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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → I have decided to auction off my soul....
I have decided to auction off my soul....
2004-02-16, 7:15 PM #1
Do I hear $50?
2004-02-16, 7:20 PM #2
How about a barrel of monkeys that is missing two monkeys?

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2004-02-16, 7:21 PM #3
we already own it.

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o.0
2004-02-16, 7:22 PM #4
i'm a religious type, so i'm incredibly afraid for you. good luck with that though.

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2004-02-16, 7:22 PM #5
Eh....maybe if the barrel had all the monkeys....
2004-02-16, 7:23 PM #6
That's right! You'll need to get it back from Massassi first.

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"Church, women are like Voltron, the more you can hook up, the better it gets!"
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2004-02-16, 7:26 PM #7
I bought a kid at my school's soul for a quarter. I am strongly considering selling it on e-bay. Hmm.... The only problem is, I have this feeling doing something like that is "wrong"...

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"The Oracle told me I would die with my boots on. I've worn tennis shoes ever since." - Axis
2004-02-16, 7:45 PM #8
Yeah, also I don't think e-bay lets you sell souls. I think it has come up before and they ruled it a part of the body, and it is against the TOS to auction it off.

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All opinions expressed by Hinch are the explicit views of Hinch, and only Hinch and his 7 other personalities. In the event that said personalities are in dispute, the majority shall prevail. All opinions are held in perpetuity of the present, past, and future throughout this universe, mirror universes, and all multi-verses, including alternate time lines.
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2004-02-16, 7:46 PM #9
Going once, going twice, SOLD to Clueless for one barrel of Monkeys -2!

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2004-02-16, 7:48 PM #10
Oh well, at least it's magical.
2004-02-16, 7:55 PM #11
[http://forums.massassi.net/html/frown.gif]

[This message has been edited by Chaotic Ghost (edited February 16, 2004).]
2004-02-16, 8:21 PM #12
I was having a conversation once with my sifu about atheists.

I told him, "I meet these people who seriously believe there's nothing more to life than chemicals an electricity. There's people out there who think all of our emotions and abilities and personalities can be explained by mere chemistry."

So sifu says, "Tell them you'll buy their soul for a dollar. If they don't believe it and they fear for their afterlife, they won't take the dollar for anything. If they do believe it, to them it's just free money. That way, when we're all in Heaven, you and I both will have a whole bunch of slaves for the rest of eternity."

Words to live by.
2004-02-16, 8:22 PM #13
hehehe

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2004-02-16, 10:01 PM #14
Except for the obvious: How is buying a person's soul, with the intention of turning them into a slave, any less evil than not believing you have one?

Better to rule in hell than serve in heaven?
2004-02-16, 10:02 PM #15
That was poorly worded. I meant evil as relative to the morals and ethics of Christians; not that disbelief is inherently evil.
2004-02-17, 1:44 AM #16
I've always jokingly give out "copies" of my soul... and I'm Christian. It's a joke!

Right?

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2004-02-17, 2:41 AM #17
In highschool i got a freshman to give me his soul in exchange for a ride home one day. did up a little bit of paper work and everything.

Hehe buying souls in a catholic school . . . fun times, fun times

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2004-02-17, 2:45 AM #18
I want to sell someone my soul. I just have to find soem poor sucker.

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WOOSH.
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Warhead[97]
2004-02-17, 3:48 AM #19
It'd be nice to rack up a few souls in my portfolio, just to say I have 'em. But not at $50.

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Steal my dreams and sell them back to me.....
Steal my dreams and sell them back to me.....
2004-02-17, 4:37 AM #20
I still own the soul of one Louis Poe. He sold it to me for $.50 while we were still in high school. Ah yes, the best purchase I've ever made. It was originally on a full sheet of paper, however I burnt the edges slowly so as to torment him a bit. Now all that remains is the center of the page which states:
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Written on Louis Poe's soul:
Contract legally binding. I bestow my soul into the hands of one Aaron Shanas for the sum of $.50. All rights and guarantees of the soul now belong to him.
-Louis Poe (signature)
</font>


I keep it in my wallet. Every now and again I consider throwing it away, but I'm not sure if it would damn him, or free him. Neither of which I want to happen. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif]

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2004-02-17, 4:57 AM #21
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by BV:
I've always jokingly give out "copies" of my soul... and I'm Christian. It's a joke!

Right?

</font>


THERE ARE NO JOKES HERE. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/tongue.gif]

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2004-02-17, 4:58 AM #22
lol yecti [http://forums.massassi.net/html/wink.gif]

well, none of us is entitled to sell our souls... maybe we could work a rental or lease deal with Brian... or does Bri even have the keys to the soul-closet anymore?
i had them for a while... [http://forums.massassi.net/html/wink.gif]

anyway...
all your sould are belong to massassi

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2004-02-17, 5:59 AM #23
Somehow I should have seen it coming - people pissing and moaning that it's evil to steal people's souls.

Consider this - the police don't consider your car stolen if you give the person the keys.
2004-02-17, 6:25 AM #24
Yeah, but you're exploiting a false belief (in your opinion) in order to trick them. If you're trying to get into heaven by following the rules you believe in, it's your duty to help the poor atheist see the error of his way. Not to mention the fact that you're following the example set by, you know, SATAN!

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Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here.

[This message has been edited by CygnusX (edited February 17, 2004).]
Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here.
2004-02-17, 7:59 AM #25
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Axis:
I bought a kid at my school's soul for a quarter. I am strongly considering selling it on e-bay. Hmm.... The only problem is, I have this feeling doing something like that is "wrong"...

</font>


Selling souls on e-bay has already been done.... I saw someone selling one for $100.00. Of course it got taken off...
No sig.
2004-02-17, 8:56 AM #26
Ebay.

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I can't think of anything to put here right now.
I can't think of anything to put here right now.
2004-02-17, 9:04 AM #27
Well then Cygnus, wouldn't I be both giving him worldy posessions (whatever I paid for his soul) and saving him (taking his soul to heaven with me, provided that's where I'm going) all in one fell swoop?
2004-02-17, 9:33 AM #28
Yay! Another pointless thread!

Post count +1

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2004-02-17, 9:55 AM #29
I'll give you $0.03 for your soul. Only after you sell it do you realize that "soul" is a collection of spirit, body, and mind!

...oh wait. I wasn't supposed to say that yet. Crap!
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by BV:
I've always jokingly give out "copies" of my soul... and I'm Christian. It's a joke!</font>
It's illegal to make copies of souls.

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2004-02-17, 12:38 PM #30
I loaned my soul to God. Apparently he was running low on non-corrupted souls, and needed some fresh ones.

Of course, over three years, with interest and inflation, he now owes me three and a half souls. That'll come in quite handy when I go to hell.

"What? I didn't do good in life? I'll do better next time!"

Satan- "There... is no next time."

"Sure there is. *Hands Satan a soul*. There, you got what you wanted, now I'll be heading back now."

Satan- "Erm... ok?"

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2004-02-17, 2:12 PM #31
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Yecti:
I still own the soul of one Louis Poe. He sold it to me for $.50 while we were still in high school. Ah yes, the best purchase I've ever made. It was originally on a full sheet of paper, however I burnt the edges slowly so as to torment him a bit. Now all that remains is the center of the page which states:
I keep it in my wallet. Every now and again I consider throwing it away, but I'm not sure if it would damn him, or free him. Neither of which I want to happen. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif]

</font>



Did you try xeroxing it?


you get An army of clones to serve you in the afterlife for 10 cents a copy. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif]




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Most people regard me as the dark and immoral side of Massassi. At least I'm getting what I want out of life.

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