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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → Funny Away Messages
Funny Away Messages
2004-11-18, 7:52 PM #1
On iChat, I frequently look at other people's away messages. An old friend who LOVES action movies had this as his away message, and it CRACKED me up.

Quote:
"He was trained to follow orders. He became a hero by defying them." - Tears of the Sun



Yeah, so post your favorite away message. They can be your own or they can be other people.
former entrepreneur
2004-11-18, 7:54 PM #2
I just made this my away message on Jabber:

Quote:
Sorry, I'm off to eat poutine, drink beer, smoke a cigarette in Church and then I'll finish the evening off having sex while watching the hockey game.


Does anyone else here use Jabber?
2004-11-18, 8:45 PM #3
This is a accidental one back in my EQ days about a year ago

I was raiding Vox with people and I had to take out the trash, it was a dull moment, so I decided to change the away message to "afk for sec"
Now, me being very stupid at the time, type it as "afk for sex"
Really akward after you tell them you're 12 :o
2004-11-18, 9:05 PM #4
'Sleep is cooler than you.'
I don't use it that much. Mainly because when I'm asleep, I'm offline. But I have it for those nights when I have to stay online to download something.
"In the beginning, the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move." - Douglas Adams
Are you finding Ling-Ling's head?
Last Stand
2004-11-18, 9:25 PM #5
My current 2 favorites that I use:

"Seperate the whites and the colors? What are you, some kind of laundry racist?"

and

"Ahhh, Cheese. Is there anything you can't do? You cheer me up when I'm sad, you fill my belly when it's gurgly, and when I'm full, I can roll you up into a ball and play with you."
2004-11-19, 12:12 PM #6
eating gruwl, yum yum yum

I'm out, like a fat kid in dodgeball...

sleep to forget about today, and wake up to your message tommrow.
Laughing at my spelling herts my feelings. Well laughing is fine actully, but posting about it is not.
2004-11-19, 12:33 PM #7
"Just remember... If the world didn't suck, then we would all fall off."

;)
2004-11-19, 12:41 PM #8
Someone I know uses "Work and class, it sucks ***."
the idiot is the person who follows the idiot and your not following me your insulting me your following the path of a idiot so that makes you the idiot - LC Tusken
2004-11-19, 1:29 PM #9
"And sleeping is a gateway drug to being awake again." - Wearing a Raincoat by They Might Be Giants

AHHaHH! I'm covered in water and soap . . . . wait a second, I'm in the shower

"Its like black licorice is slowly kicking my ***." - John Robbins on Jagermiester
"It sounds like an epidemic."
"Look, I don't know what that means. But it happens all the time." - Penny Arcade
Last.fm
2004-11-19, 1:39 PM #10
I have no humerous ones. But thankfully I don't post emo song lyrics or such tripe. Ugh I can't stand those on me friend's away messages.
Code to the left of him, code to the right of him, code in front of him compil'd and thundered. Programm'd at with shot and $SHELL. Boldly he typed and well. Into the jaws of C. Into the mouth of PERL. Debug'd the 0x258.
2004-11-19, 1:46 PM #11
Lesbian vampire killing warrior pincess pirate... thing...



my best friend.
Sneaky sneaks. I'm actually a werewolf. Woof.
2004-11-19, 1:50 PM #12
That's her MSN name, not her away message. :p

"I'm currently either:
1. Away.
2. Sleeping.
3. Busy.
4. Ignoring you.

Pick whichever offends you least"
2004-11-19, 1:57 PM #13
I use: "I have beaten you to a state of unconsciousness" in place of "sleeping."
This Space Intentionally Left Blank.
2004-11-19, 2:05 PM #14
I have a friend who uses "eating hair" and "sexplodes" a lot.

I'm currently set to "Help!" Because I can. Oh well.

Maybe I'll change it to "Get the f*** of my internet!"
Catloaf, meet mouseloaf.
My music
2004-11-19, 2:14 PM #15
Quote:
Originally posted by gothicX
That's her MSN name, not her away message. :p

"I'm currently either:
1. Away.
2. Sleeping.
3. Busy.
4. Ignoring you.

Pick whichever offends you least"




GRRRRRRRRR. GRR. GRRR. I mean, nobody knew.... you could've just pretended it wasn't her msn name... :p
Sneaky sneaks. I'm actually a werewolf. Woof.
2004-11-20, 5:54 AM #16
My custom AIM gaming away message:

"I am playing a game, and cannot be contacted. My real life is suspended until further notice, but when the suspension has lifted, I shall be available via AIM again. Please do not try to contact me, as no one wants to talk to a person who is in a vegetative state, with their hands literally glued to the mouse, in a dark, dark room."
2004-11-20, 8:59 AM #17
Mine is "Shhhhh!" most of the time. Pretty funny to come back and see how whoever I was talking to repiled to it.
The tired anthem of a loser and a hypocrite.
2004-11-20, 9:08 AM #18
I either have a blank away message or this:

"Don't be offended if I don't respond, I'm playing a game...... Yeah, it sucks, deal with it."

I've got better ones, but I don't want to look through all of them
2004-11-20, 10:05 AM #19
"I'm busy not being here. Leave a message."
2004-11-20, 12:20 PM #20
Quote:
"Rape the cows and massacre the women.
...no wait, the other way around!" -[a viking]


Quote:
Interdum feror cupidine partium magnarum Europae vincendarum
Sometimes I get this urge to conquer large parts of Europe.

Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
When catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults

Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.
I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head


Quote:
To see how to keep a retard busy, Click here.
May the mass times acceleration be with you.
2004-11-20, 5:58 PM #21
It doesn't work.

*clicks frantically*
Catloaf, meet mouseloaf.
My music
2004-11-20, 6:44 PM #22
My standard is usually "A way to be away." Some others include:
  • Feeding my "food" addiction
  • Half-life: it's better than a whole life
  • *insert original-yet-uninformative away message here*
  • Whee vs. Wraa: who will win?
  • "Sleep is for the weak. And teenagers." ~Janitor Bob, The Never-ending Story Thread
  • sha-sha-sha-SHOWER! </chia pet>


And a few lines from The Neverending Story movie's opening song :) There are others, but those tend to be the ones that get used, or as in the Half-Life case, reused :D
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-11-21, 3:15 PM #23
Quote:
procrastination is like masterbation, its all good until you realized you ****ed yourself

Another one I saw today. lol
An admin may remove this if it is against the rules -- it doesn't seem to be, but my judgements are worthless ;-)
May the mass times acceleration be with you.
2004-11-21, 11:16 PM #24
^HAHAHAHAa!!

That was awesome.:D
2004-11-21, 11:43 PM #25
On the occassion that I'm online, but away(I tend to just turn off my client when going offline), I usually use this one, because its true:

"A man's gotta believe in something...
I believe I'll go fishing."
Marsz, marsz, Dąbrowski,
Z ziemi włoskiej do Polski,
Za twoim przewodem
Złączym się z narodem.

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