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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → Kill Mom But Don't Hurt TV, Teen Tells Hitman
Kill Mom But Don't Hurt TV, Teen Tells Hitman
2004-04-16, 1:18 PM #1
Kill Mom But Don't Hurt TV, Teen Tells Hitman

Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">MIAMI (Reuters) - A Florida teen charged with hiring an undercover policeman to shoot and kill his mother instructed the purported hitman not to damage the family television during the attack, police said on Thursday.</font>


All I can say is LOL.

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Kids must be shot by Monday.

Honesty tests for workers can't be trusted, report says.

Psychopaths are unpredictable.

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2004-04-16, 1:21 PM #2
<Ishionu> http://forums.massassi.net/html/Forum1/HTML/034439.html <--Can we make a freaking Fark forum or something?
i second this

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Free Jin!
2004-04-16, 1:21 PM #3
Oh dear.. what is the world coming to when someone values a TV over their own mother?

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WARNING: THIS POST MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF PEANUT!!!
----@%
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eJkWhoSaysNiTheJkWhoSaysNiTheJkWhoSaysNiTheJkWhoSa
ysNiTheJkWhoSaysNiTheJkWhoSaysNiTheJkWhoSaysNiTheJ
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2004-04-16, 1:39 PM #4
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by TheJkWhoSaysNi:
Oh dear.. what is the world coming to when someone values a TV over their own mother?

</font>



Welcome to the world that FOX spawned.


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2004-04-16, 1:42 PM #5
what kind of TV is it?

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2004-04-16, 2:07 PM #6
ROFL!!!!

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2004-04-16, 3:04 PM #7
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by DrkJedi82:
what kind of TV is it?

</font>


Yah, i mean, do you realize how much a plasma screen TV is today?

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2004-04-16, 3:30 PM #8
And with the increased teenaged-mom population on the rise I'd say there's no shortage of moms. But Plasma TVs on the other hand. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/eek.gif]

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You're entering a world of pain.
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2004-04-16, 7:46 PM #9
Spoiled brat... throw him in prison for a while... should fix him up.

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Don't be unwise judge me not by my size. You wont believe your eyes watch the xwing rise!
2004-04-16, 8:02 PM #10
I don't see what the problem is. I mean, if the TV got damaged, where's he going to plug in his Xbox? Which is clearly what trained him how to hire a hitman to kill his mother. If anything, the Xbox should be put in prison.

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«»The Scratchware Manifesto
-¬thoughts from beyond observance
2004-04-16, 8:07 PM #11
Yes because we all know that killing video game characters and killing a living breathing human being is the same thing. Those *******s...

Oh! Oh! While we are at it lets ban Timon and Pumba's jungle games cause they teach violence to bugs and other jungle creatures... or we could just sue the mother for being stupid enough to let her child play games he was under age for... I mean those ratings are not on the side of the box for cover art you know, and I know he's 17 but this much brain damage takes years.

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Don't be unwise judge me not by my size. You wont believe your eyes watch the xwing rise!

[This message has been edited by MechWarrior (edited April 16, 2004).]
2004-04-16, 8:14 PM #12
But she's the mother. It's impossible for her to make any mistakes in raising her children. Everyone knows all boys are ultra-violent spawns of satan, and video games are the medium for which the dark lord trains his minions in the outerworlds to be the remorseless killers that they were destined to be. If only we were all forced to go to Church.. because, y'know, no Church going boys play video games.

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«»The Scratchware Manifesto
-¬thoughts from beyond observance
2004-04-16, 8:22 PM #13
Of course I say they should team up and ban video games cause we all know there is no diffrence between fantasy and reality and that whatever you see in a video game you must act out in real life.

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Don't be unwise judge me not by my size. You wont believe your eyes watch the xwing rise!
2004-04-16, 8:28 PM #14
Exactly. Because we all know that what you see on a TV screen is actually something happening in a parallel dimension, and the actions which take place in that dimension will inevitably fall back in to this reality as the physical actions of those who viewed it. Well, those who viewed it that are under the age of 21.

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«»The Scratchware Manifesto
-¬thoughts from beyond observance
2004-04-16, 8:30 PM #15
Haha, stupid teens.

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<landfish> FastGamerr > Satan
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2004-04-16, 8:33 PM #16
Of course Jin because the evil people who made TV actually put brain transmitters that only effect the young because their brains are not properly developed yet. So they are using this to secretly make an army of stupid mindless zombies that are willing to kill even their own parents for the good of the greater cause.

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Don't be unwise judge me not by my size. You wont believe your eyes watch the xwing rise!
2004-04-16, 8:41 PM #17
Exactly. The greater cause being a conspiracy involving anarchy, communism and John Romero.

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«»The Scratchware Manifesto
-¬thoughts from beyond observance
2004-04-16, 9:34 PM #18
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Jin:
But she's the mother. It's impossible for her to make any mistakes in raising her children. Everyone knows all boys are ultra-violent spawns of satan, and video games are the medium for which the dark lord trains his minions in the outerworlds to be the remorseless killers that they were destined to be. If only we were all forced to go to Church.. because, y'know, no Church going boys play video games.

</font>


I haven't laughed that hard in quite awhile.

Thank You.

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2004-04-17, 5:44 AM #19
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Jin:
Exactly. The greater cause being a conspiracy involving anarchy, communism and John Romero.

</font>


Exactly its and it all links back to the green men from Mars that Nasa edited out of their pictures.


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Don't be unwise judge me not by my size. You wont believe your eyes watch the xwing rise!
2004-04-17, 9:29 AM #20
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Noble Outlaw:
Yah, i mean, do you realize how much a plasma screen TV is today?

</font>


If it was expensive, maybe he aimed to sell it off to get money to start again - ever think of that?


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2004-04-17, 11:05 AM #21
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Jin:
no Church going boys play video games.

</font>


that was satire, but still, you may be interested to know that at my church's youth group, we have Halo LAN parties.

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Ω of 14
New! Fun removed by Vinny :[
2004-04-17, 11:22 AM #22
...and the lord did grin...

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2004-04-17, 11:34 AM #23
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Jin:
But she's the mother. It's impossible for her to make any mistakes in raising her children. Everyone knows all boys are ultra-violent spawns of satan, and video games are the medium for which the dark lord trains his minions in the outerworlds to be the remorseless killers that they were destined to be. If only we were all forced to go to Church.. because, y'know, no Church going boys play video games.</font>


ROFL



------------------
Kids must be shot by Monday.

Honesty tests for workers can't be trusted, report says.

Psychopaths are unpredictable.

Jay Leno's Headlines > Everything
||Arena of Fire || Grand Temple of Fire ||

The man who believes he can and the man who believes he can't are both right. Which are you?
2004-04-17, 2:41 PM #24
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by SAJN_Master:
...and the lord did grin...

</font>


As funny as this thread has become, that had me laughing the hardest [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif]

------------------
"No good can ever come from staying with normal people"
-Outlaw Star
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul"
-Tycho, Penny Arcade
"I'm a Cannabal-Vegitarian. I will BBQ an employee if there is no veggie option"
-DX:IW
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
The Never Ending Story²
"I consume the life essence itself!... Preferably medium rare" - Mauldis

-----@%
2004-04-17, 4:15 PM #25
Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by MechWarrior:
Exactly its and it all links back to the green men from Mars that Nasa edited out of their pictures.


</font>


You fool. NASA isn't real.
2004-04-17, 9:57 PM #26
[http://home.hot.rr.com/fzone/abouttobake.jpg]

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A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk I have a workstation...
2004-04-18, 4:37 AM #27
LOL...this thread has gone insane.

------------------
Kids must be shot by Monday.

Honesty tests for workers can't be trusted, report says.

Psychopaths are unpredictable.

Jay Leno's Headlines > Everything
||Arena of Fire || Grand Temple of Fire ||

The man who believes he can and the man who believes he can't are both right. Which are you?
2004-04-18, 11:55 AM #28
It was sane to begin with?

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Don't be unwise judge me not by my size. You wont believe your eyes watch the xwing rise!
2004-04-18, 12:23 PM #29
It might have been.

------------------
Kids must be shot by Monday.

Honesty tests for workers can't be trusted, report says.

Psychopaths are unpredictable.

Jay Leno's Headlines > Everything
||Arena of Fire || Grand Temple of Fire ||

The man who believes he can and the man who believes he can't are both right. Which are you?
2004-04-18, 5:15 PM #30
Maybe the TV had a v-chip and the kid wanted to get his mom killed so he could search her room for the code so he could watch some Skinemax.

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