This is a post about one of my recent experiences. It *will* bore you.
Just got out of an exam, statistics, which is arguably the hardest subject in my year. It's the reason why only 35% of my year will pass in one try.
Pfffffff.... I'm entirely shook up. That exam totally challenged my views of myself: that I'm smart, and that I'm able to learn whatever subject I want, in half the time it takes the population to do it.
But this one... man. I studied and studied and studied for this, and had nights of staying at home studying and restudying, when everyone else was out partying. But still, I think of how I did on my exam, and I honestly don't know. I think I passed, but I'm not sure at all. I might have failed.
If I failed, I honestly don't know what to change. Previous years I could rationalize lesser grades (which were still great) because I never studied, or because I have an attention disorder. Now I can't rationalize anymore: if my exam went bad, it's because of me. And I really don't know what I can do to deal with that.
Signing off. I hope you all have a good night, in contrast.
Just got out of an exam, statistics, which is arguably the hardest subject in my year. It's the reason why only 35% of my year will pass in one try.
Pfffffff.... I'm entirely shook up. That exam totally challenged my views of myself: that I'm smart, and that I'm able to learn whatever subject I want, in half the time it takes the population to do it.
But this one... man. I studied and studied and studied for this, and had nights of staying at home studying and restudying, when everyone else was out partying. But still, I think of how I did on my exam, and I honestly don't know. I think I passed, but I'm not sure at all. I might have failed.
If I failed, I honestly don't know what to change. Previous years I could rationalize lesser grades (which were still great) because I never studied, or because I have an attention disorder. Now I can't rationalize anymore: if my exam went bad, it's because of me. And I really don't know what I can do to deal with that.
Signing off. I hope you all have a good night, in contrast.
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