so. I'm avoiding work the best way I know how - starcraft. Nobody is around so I start trawling through the games on battlenet. There's one called mini starcraft and being the girly girl that I sometimes am, I can't resist joining something with mini in the name. As it turns out, mini starcraft is a 64x64 with endless resources and everything sped up, as in most (all?) UMS maps. The map is 3 v 3, but the guy hosting it starts the game with just two on each team. I notice that the two players I'm playing against have some [b0o8] type clan tag in their names. Oh dear.

You still with me? Alright, so the game starts. I'm protoss. Immediately one of the two clan guys starts pissing off my teammate by rushing. After pestering him for a while, the guy just leaves and I'm left alone to face these guys. "Sod it", I think, may as well carry on. I start to expand, and bearing in mind that it's me vs two of them, I figure it's a good idea to put up some defenses. What follows is a description of the conversation during the game, with my text in limegreen, true starcraft stylee.
____

oh look, it's a cannon f**

...

let the f** have his fun

1 - wtf? a cannon f**?

2 - I'm a girl, imbecile. "maevie"??

fine. her fun

*pause as we continue playing for a few minutes, they realise I'm holding my own*

u wanna join a clan?

hahahahaha

omfq no

fine, then die like the b**** you are

how very mature, thanks

*they attack, I obviously die*

im a homo male

um...good for you?
____

apart from the guys last, quite random line, I was just laughing all the way through. I would also like to apologise to anyone here in a clan, I realise not everyone is that bad.

This is why the D2 community is so much better. For the most part there aren't any more ******* who like to *clan* like that. Just don't play on Open Bnet. For the love of god. That's a nightmare. But ladder games are nice.

Diablo II makes up for it's lack of clans with its abundance in hackers

It's nice to comment on stuff you don't know about isn't it Jon?

That's why you don't play on Open Bnet. Ladder games are clean, and for the most part devoid of hacking. Especially after the 1.10 patch.

Ouch. Aaron, that was below the belt. Assuming I have no idea what I am talking about like 90% of the time! Shame on you! Shame!

Okay, you got me. I've never laid a finger anywhere near Diablo II. I have a few friends at school who used to play all the time. They ended up stopping because it was near impossible to play the game without having people around them hacking. They said people would set their characters to paths all day, and map hacks to reveal stuff that you shouldn't see, and money and blah blah blah...

Then again maybe they didn't play these 'Ladder Games'...you and your 'lingo' >.> <.<

[Edit: maevie, there are the same type of people in Warcraft III. In WCIII people always make custom maps and then make the thumbnail of the level gay porn or ****** or something gross like that. Then there are always the people who take the game wayyy to seriously. Ex. One time I was playing with 3 other people. The guy on my team started spamming the chat with "WTF are you doing guy! You are building on my space! What is wrong with you! You dumb f***ing noob! Jesus!!! Get your barracks out of here guy!!!!" This is why I try to play games with only people I know.]

Hehehe. You two seriously sound like you're married.

Anyway yeah, I usually only play with Flex (who's never around these days), and lately happydud and Fishstickz have been getting me into UMS games. But there was nobody around so I braved it. I had one really awful game with people just swearing at eachother constantly. I did meet a couple of reasonable human beings though.

The only thing we DO agree on is politics. Somehow we still manage to get along with eachother. :p I think we both know not to take each other too serious.

Anyway back to what you said. I never played Starcraft, but I have never heard a bad thing about it. I keep seeing it for like $2 at EBGames and I figure "Nahh, I'll pick it up next time."

BUY IT. NOW. :p

She speaks the truth!

I stopped playing online because of these "people". Not many of my friends are into online gaming, or have the games I like to play, so playing with people I know isn't really an option. SP gaming all the way!

I can't buy Starcraft now

I need to earn $500 in 69 days. (Germany Spending/Lunch money)

I need to earn $35 in 47 days. (Guild Wars)

I need to earn $5 in 9 days ( Poker 100% legal activities)

I need to earn $2 in 18 hours (I owe a friend money for him buying my school lunch today)

I need to get a new job...

So the soonest I can buy Starcraft is in 70 or so days :p

Hey maeve, what realm do you play on?
Be prepared to get sieged into the ground

Haha, are you kidding? :p

HUK! ^_^ PKPKPKPKPKPK

LOL U PK HOMO

LOL LET'S DO ANDY RUN LOL

DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!
DOES ANY1 HAEV SOJ???!?!??!??!??!

I think I had a copy of Starcraft somewhere.

But it's the same with many other games.

That's... something.

I've seen worse.
The horde on my server is just....
But yeah, b.netters suck.
They laugh at you if they think you 'suck'.
When you manage to beat them using the strategy that 'sucked' they go and claim
"HAXZ0RZ!!!"

My favorite line, FAVORITE line ever.

Dud, Maeve and I are playing a game of Turret defense with one other guy. Maeve and dud are doing things their way, when this guy starts.

Guy: You guys need to get kerrigans.

Maeve: Im not a guy.

Guy: Whatever

Dud: Me and maeve are saving for probes to get cannons, we need them in the later levels.

Guy: You guyz need to get kerriganz! Or we l0se.

Dud: We are doing just fine

Maeve: We are saving, why dont you just let us do it our way.

Guy: You two are F***ing over the internet. Aren't you?

Dud: Constantly.

I love battlenet. I used to be a diabloII + expansion junkie on closed Battlenet. I tried open (aka cheater) battlenet once, and all sorts of crazy **** happened. For insiders: I saw a guy with a ring - embedded with a rune. That's freaky. I also came across people who hit you with a sword across 5 screens. The strangest thing I saw though was a barbarian who wielded a buriza bow and could use both multiple arrow and guided arrow, infinitely. AT ONCE.

Dj-Yoshi and I were playing a game of WC3 against these two other people. They were good, I won't deny that. But we thought we could challenge them none the less. So as we're playing along, the two opponents couldn't shut up on how "1337" they were. It was like "omg guyz l00k how n3wb they are lololol" Finally I just left because I really didn't want to read 13 year old tripe.

O_o

I really need to get in a game of SC with you all sometime

Ok, I was playing WoW for the first time, and some guy is like "This lag sucks, why doesn't Blizzard just get more servers?"
So I can't resist... I pipe up "Wow, genius. Quick send that to tech support I don't think they've thought of that"

INSTANTLY about 10 people call me a fat nerd who gets picked on, wears glasses, has no girlfriend, only plays WoW, doesn't go outside, and then a bunch of random gay comments.

Now THAT is a Blizzard community.

I like it when all the begginers in WoW got their first quests they would always spam things like "Where can I find the NightElf Healer! I need to do a quest!" and it's always fun to screw with them and say "He's at Ironforge!"

Hehe.

Go here and read first log entry

Its quite hilarious.

B.net is pretty much crap yeah. If they aren't using map hacks their backstabbing you.

I never play strategy games over the internet, mainly because I suck so bad at them. I mostly do FPS(which I rule at) and RPG(which are fun if I don't get too bored leveling). I remember getting WoW the second day it came out(it wasn't planned and was one of those knee-jerk buys) and there was one guy on the general constantly *****ing about the loot lag. However, most everybody else actively chatting in general told him to shut up at one point, which made me smile.

Ha, if I had SC on here, I might actually wing it.

Then again, I suck at SC like nobody's buisness. Single player kicks my ***. A lot. =\

I have starcraft, but it's been a long time since I've played. If I find my CDs I'll play with you maevie

Me and some friends are going to start playing again. Last time I checked, I schooled them all, 1v2 (2 at a time). I suppose it helps that I used to play with people that played in the WCG though :p

And you get used to the people in BNet--or you join the 'elite' circle and stop playing public games. The latter is what happened to me (though trust me, I do not match up to any of the decent guys at SC. Still fun)

Don't you hate it when you start up a 2v6c game (I do these all the time) and you name the game 2v6c IMPOSSIBLE! or 2v6c xpert only or something like that...and some guy joins, I say
"this is going to be really hard"
"ok, don't worry I rulez at this map lolz!!!1"
countdown...

"I'm going to zealot rush!"
*smacks forehead*

"Stacked cannon defense. No noobs"

During the game:

Me: Uh. Why aren't you stacking?
Guy: How du u stak?
Me: notice how it says no noobs?
Guy: we need tu lirn at sum pont
Me: Why don't you do that in a game that DOSEN'T SAY THAT. *abuses reds kickage ability*

Same here.

Multiplayer game developers should always bear in mind that you can never underestimate the general flock of online players.

Zeal rush is a very usable strategy. Unfortunately, most people suck with it. They never get goons.

WarCraft 3 is by far the worst... DOTA... omg those games can get rather bad. From leavers to noobs... to people who play the game way to much and think it's real.

I have had to come up with a whole new series of insult, and sometimes I have to range into other languages to properly diss the people in DotA games. My God.

This is also pretty much why I don't prefer multiplayer games. At least, when you just drop in the middle of some random folks. With a scheduled game, you tend to know the players, or at least, their preferred playstyle a bit. There's no way that I would still be playing NWN if the only way I could play was by dropping in the middle of a random game or Persistant World, instead of a scheduled game.

I love it, when I have to hold myself against two opps, because my teammate had to leave or something.
I love it even more, if I can hold out for over half an hour although I play serg and the opps are both toss.
And I love it most when they apreciate how I played by giving me ally all.
But I haven't played SC over B.net for ages because of suckers that call you a noob for managing a drop on them.

Hackers on SC Bnet do suck, thats why I usualy only play with friends or people who play honestly and I've be-friended them on Bnet, they can be rare at times.

I did have one way to stop my loosing via backstappings tho, One hack I had notifyed me if an ally un-allied me, this was a clue that he was going to back stap, the hack then auto unallied me the second he fired on one of my units, thats where they try and catch you off guard, is ammas an army and then attack when you don't expect it, oten I've got defences in place and set up enough to repel the attacker and it's also more then enough to wipe out the backstabber.

They rely on the fact that thery can have your turrets/cannons/defensive units wiped out by the time you can un-ally them, but with the program, I counter as soon as just one of my units is fired on, complelty catching him offguard and annilating his strike force, sucks when they work together tho, you don't have enough resources to fight on two fronts when you expected to only fight on one, but you still get to inflict some serious damage.

One friend had a hack with the ally alert hack was a drop hack, if they did not re-ally him, he'd warn them to re-ally or be defeated, if they did not comply and attacked, he'd use the hack on them and they'd lag out of the game.

I'd get that all the time. Zerg is actually easy to fend off with...hordes of lings are your friend