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ForumsDiscussion Forum → Looking for a plot
Looking for a plot
2005-02-19, 6:21 PM #1
It's really amazing what you can do with little or no budget filmwise. I must have spent a couple hours last night watching some amazingly cheesy martial arts home-made movies, and it must have brainwashed me, because I suddenly have an urge to make one of my own.

I'm not a newcomer to the field of filmmaking, as I've managed a few short flicks before, and I think I have something of an eye for shot angles. However, for the past few months, I've been at a loss for inspiration in all things artistic. While I have a lot of resources at my disposal now, I can't, for the life of me think of any sort of premise/plot for this film, and here's where I'm hoping that the comic geniuses of Massassidom might come to my rescue.

Here are some of the elements I have available. All you have to do is put them together into something coherent and then add humor. :S

  • A derelict basement perfect for some shadow government interrogation with a window to the surface ideal for a ninja to come down and own everyone present. I have an assault rifle, uniforms for a small paramilitary squad, actors, etc.
  • A pretty imposing dam with a cliff on one side and woods on the other. It seems suitable for some sort of meditation or the entrance to that basement bunkerish sort of place.
  • Long, winding train-tracks for one of those 80's voices in your head with echoes scenes where someone takes a long, soul searching walk.
  • A ruined, hundred year old manorial garden, all overgrown with stone walls and a broken marble fountain. Good for a moody scene or some sort of endgamish showdown.
  • A beautiful wood-paneled conference room with a long table and white leather chairs for some sort of official meeting. I have actors that could go here too, and they all have sharp suits.
  • An underground network of shady tunnels that are very claustrophobic.
  • A parking lot for one of those standoff scenes where two posses meet and exchange money for goods.
  • A lake.
  • Tons of computers and equipment that I can use for a control room or destroy.
  • A sabre, a katana, a trident, an HK-USP airsoft, a BAR, a .22 rifle, a Tai Chi sword, tin foil, a toy raygun, wiffle bats, a safari hat, a guitar case, and lots of briefcases.
  • A kitchen.
  • A wooded trail ideal for some sort of patrol or ambush.
  • A veritable army of goons/minions/soldiers/ninjas, some of whom look especially goofy.


Any ideas? I can thinm of a few well-constructed scenes, but none are funny in the slightest, and few involve martial arts.
Cordially,
Lord Tiberius Grismath
1473 for '1337' posts.
2005-02-19, 6:37 PM #2
i can't think of anything funny, but i can see the basement scene slaughter by a ninja transition to a yakuza boss up on the dam asking if the job was done...
Holy soap opera Batman. - FGR
DARWIN WILL PREVENT THE DOWNFALL OF OUR RACE. - Rob
Free Jin!
2005-02-19, 8:10 PM #3
Any other ideas?
Cordially,
Lord Tiberius Grismath
1473 for '1337' posts.
2005-02-19, 8:30 PM #4
LoG: THE MOVIE

2005-02-19, 8:55 PM #5
BAR? As in the incredibly overpowered and accurate atomatic rifle made by browning and that kicked the **** out of the germans in WWII? I like... But what you need is a sniper scene like in the Bourne Supremacy, and have the sniper on the cliff, and the ninja sneaks to the top and kills the sniper. You could have the dam be a secret military base, and the sniper is looking for the ninjas (the sniper is a military guy) because they are afraid of an attack. So the sniper is killed, and a watchman hears something, and military guys come streaming out of the "base" (the dam) with their guns and start trying to attack the ninja, but the ninja owns all the military guys and then you have a scene where the military generals or whatever order people to take down the control room equipment (the control room could be in the dam) and evacuate and then they get away in a car or truck or whatever and the ninja stands on top of the dam watching them drive off...
"You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!" Anyone who recognizes this quote is awsome.
2005-02-19, 9:08 PM #6
They all get hit with a giant rock and die.

The End. <3
2005-02-20, 1:29 AM #7
Well, one real hint: If you can get some older people in, even just a few, you win a lot. Many amateur movies are ruined by the fact that all bosses, and masters, and generals, and politicians are <30 years old guys (or gals).
Frozen in the past by ICARUS
2005-02-20, 8:10 AM #8
Right, but it kind of makes all the other ~20 actors look too young.
Cordially,
Lord Tiberius Grismath
1473 for '1337' posts.
2005-02-20, 8:16 AM #9
Canadian animal rights activists are trying to blow up the Hoover Dam with briefcase bombs. The secret Ninja branch of the Salvation Army, led by charismatic young Robin Surname is dispatched in an attempt to stop them. However, they are apprahended by the CIA/FBI/other three-letter acronym and Robin is put into a make-shift detention cell. The other Ninja tries a daring rescue plan involving machine guns and kicks.

But will they manage to get him out before the Canadians blow the Dam and end life on Earth as we know it?
VTEC just kicked in, yo!
2005-02-20, 8:28 AM #10
haha, now there's a start

Here's what I've been thinking thus far scenewise:

It's a dark night, and distant headlights illuminate a forest path down which proceeds a paramilitary patrol of about 5. At the front of the group, a soldier is armed with a heavy machinegun with a flashlight, and behind him they lead a prisoner with a black hood over her head. A soldier at the rear radios into control that they have reached waypoint bravo.

In the control room, which is illuminated chiefly by the glow of a bank of monitors, an operator copies and tells them to proceed to base on foot.

On one side of the path is a large river, on the other, a long ride illuminated by the moon. The soldiers fail to notice two black figures run past, silhouetted in the light, and all at once, the ninjas are upon them.

As the squad walks, a staff slams one of them in the head, everyone looks to the right, but a second ninja jumps off a tree and breaks the neck of the nearest soldier. The front soldier turns his BAR but the ninja gets closer to the solider than the barrel. The soldier smacks the ninja with the butt of his rifle, while another soldier goes down to a dagger wound. The gunner turns around and sprays the second ninja who goes down with a thud. When he turns around, the first ninja is gone.

He looks over and the prisoner is standing alone, shivering, surrounded by the fallen bodies of the squad. Looking around for the enemy, he is met only with the sounds of the night. His flashlight goes out. He grabs the prisoner and runs on.

After an establishing shot of the dam, the prisoner and soldier go down a stairway and enter the facility.

Back at the control room, the operator verifies that the prisoner has been delivered, and instructs the soliders in the base to hold the prisoner for questioning by an incoming government liason.

While he's saying this, the camera shows two cars park on the side of a road, and men in black suits exit.

In the facility, all is quiet, as the men doze, play cards, etc. Suddenly they one hears a noise and goes up the stairs to check, there's a crunching sound, and he falls down the stairs. Everyone perks up and readies their weapons. One soldier with a pistol gets up against a corner and aims at the stairwell. Behind him, the same ninja as before enters through the window and snaps his neck. In one motion he kicks another soldier and throws a star at the light, which goes out. The first soldier with the BAR freaks out and sprays the entire room until he runs out of ammo from the stairwell (which is illuminated). He hears a noise from above and turns around, only to point his gun at the government liason. The liason shines a light into the room and sees that everyone is dead and the prisoner missing.
Cordially,
Lord Tiberius Grismath
1473 for '1337' posts.

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