Ok, long back story. Basically like a month and a half ago my friend introduced me to this girl online. We just started talking online and we really got along good. we talked online for about 2 weeks before calling each other. We usually talked on the phone for about 3 hours, easily. About 2 weeks ago i meet up with her in DC, and we go and see Million Dollar Baby. We end up making out the whole movie and leaving early because the seats were too uncomfortable, but by that time it was about 12, so i had to go home. So the next day we set up plans to meet again, today.

At about 11 today i ask my parents if i could go to DC to see her. They said that they would think about driving me, if i left at an appropriate time. I said that i wanted to leave at about 2. They said that they couldn't drive me, so i asked if i could take the metro, and they said that i was forbidden to go on the metro. So then i argue with them for about an hour about why i should and ****. They told me that if i went that they would take everything that i ever loved away from me. that means that they would take all of my guitars, my skateboard, my friends, my computer, my iPod, my ****ing door. everything., I told them it was worth it and i walked off.

I really really really REALLY want to see her, and i know that my parents will never let me go into DC and that they will take everything i love away. I dunno, i think the consequences are worth it, but i also think that they aren't...

Why couldn't you just leave earlier? I mean...couldn't you have just said "Alright, well, what's a good time to leave?"

It sucks to be in this position, and the fact that you're underage probably doesn't make it any better/easier. Personally, I'd get your license and a car ASAP and just try to maintain the relationship until you two can meet up with regular ease. Easiest solution (at least by the sound of it)

Dis-obeying your parents, even if they are a bit over-protective, really isnt the best way to show how mature you are.

How old exactly are you? By DC I assume you mean the District of Columbia, and Washington is a pretty sketchy place. But since you didnt state your age, one really can't form an opinion about whether or not you should be allowed to go to DC alone, or meet up with strangers from the internet even.

Maybe you should have checked with your parents before committing to a time to meet? I dunno.

How old are you? Its not a good idea to go. Why not tell the girl why you can't go and arrange a better time with your parents to go?

the reason i couldn't go earlier is because she was at the gym. I'm 15 and 1/2. In VA you have to be 15 1/2 to get your permit, however they won't let me get my permit because of insurance rates, and my grades.

The situation has changed however. She is coming to my house instead of me going to DC. So all is good so far.

I have lived in DC so i know what its like, and i go there every once in a while, so i wouldn't say its soo sketchy. But that is because i've lived there.

1. You are 15 1/2...you are in your crazy 'love' hormone of death puberty stage. You don't LOVE her. I've seen this happen millions of times. In highschool you see girls and guys "Oh man, he/she is the love of my life!" They break up a week later, about a few days after that they both have new boyfriends and girlfriends, and you know what? They 'love' them too.

2. Listen to your parents. It was not worth getting all your stuff taken away. I would bet money that this relationship won't last very long. Here are my two main reasons. First of all, how many people do you know that are around your age have dated girls for a year or longer/ maybe even married them? The second part that makes it even worse is that you guys live THAT far apart. You have long distance and age going against you.

3. Shame on you for making out during such a great film like 'Million Dollar Baby' :p

4. Buy her a bouquet of bacon. Chicks dig it.

My two cents.

1) & 2)

Three pairs of aunts and uncles I have met each other in Freshman year of High school. Been married 10 years, no (major) problems. 2 kids, house, suburbian lifestyle.

Now I'm not saying that happens for everyone, or even that it'll happen here. Just give the guy at least a shadow of a doubt, eh?

well, she just went home. When we came back after i went to get her, i saw that my door was gone. My parents thought that i actually went to DC so they really took my door away. I just said to her "yeah, i'm gonna go ask my parents for my door back." it was the most akward thing ever.

I'm not grounded, and i got to see her, so case closed heh.

Just the fact that your parents took your door away makes me giggle. If my parents said that it would be an empty promise...Well my parents wouldn't say that, because I never use my door anyway.

Rofl, the door? That's like, the most pointless punishment in the world! Here, take my beloved dust collection on my desk while your at it!

Hehe, my door is equally useless.

And damnit, now I want bacon.

If they took your door away they mean business. It would behoove of you to obey their every wish for the remaining 2.5 years you have. I'm with SAJN here. It really isn't worth it to lose your parents' trust over this. Would you rather have your remaining years under their watch good ones or bad ones? I'd really hate to be cliché here but damnit it's soo true. You will appreciate this later on in your life. Trust. Me.

Were they..going to kidnap your friends?

why don't you just stand on some train tracks and smile.

hehe yeah they took the door, which is actually pretty big for me because i use my door all the time. But they day went well, she came to Falls Church (where i live) and we just hung around for the entire day. It was fun and ****. I do think that my parents still don't trust me, but i think i gained some respect by not disobeying them, which is a good thing.

i still cant believe they took my door though....

You should just pretend that you don't notice your door is gone, and go about your day acting like it's there... pretending to open/close it, changing your clothes in plain sight, etc.... see what kind of reaction that gets.

I don't see why they should have gained respect for you.

You argued with your parents for an hour. You basically tell your parents you don't care and walk off. The girl ended up hanging out with you anyway, so in the end you still got what YOU wanted.

SAJN--it's **** like this that makes people dislike you terribly. In one post you've:

Basically told his parents how to parent
Insulted him for doing something that wasn't...wrong
And told him how to be himself.

Lay off. Seriously. He didn't do anything wrong. And everything's fine. No reason to incite a flame war.

And I know tons of people who arue with their parents. It doesn't mean they're bad kids...they just disagree. And parents rarely ever see it from an objective viewpoint--all they know is that they want what they want (for whatever reason. Note, I'm not saying this is inherently bad or anything)

Calm down guys. Don't make this thread be closed.

I kinda agree with SAJN really.

He didn't do anything special by not disobeying them. He didn't really need to make the choice.

People don't hate me. I don't explode like you are doing on every debate.


"I don't see why they should have gained respect for you." That is what I said, in response to him saying "I do think that my parents still don't trust me, but i think i gained some respect". I just said I don't see why they would have gained respect, then I listed reasons.



I never told him how to be himself, and he did do something wrong. He argued with his parents for an hour. They didn't want him to go on a metro because they obviously feel it isn't safe or maybe they didn't want him to go. Either way, they are the parents. Your problem is that you like to rebel against adults, when most of the time they KNOW WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT.



I haven't flamed anyone so far. You are the one getting way out of hand in almost every thread on the Discussion Page.


The parents saw that a 15 1/2 year old going on a metro alone to D.C. was a bad idea. They stopped him from going. He argued. He was wrong. Case closed.

Actually, they pretty much don't know what they're talking about.

Here is what I gather from his first post...


Him: Can you drive me to a girls place in DC?

Parents: Yes, if you pick an appropriate time.

Him: 2 pm

Parents: We can't make it then.

Him: Can I take the metro

Parents: No.

Then he argues with his parents for an hour. The parents threaten to take away his valued items if he disobeyed them.

So in other words, he asked to go out, his parents agreed if it was a good time. So he gave them only 3 hours notice and they said they couldn't make it. He asked to go on the metro, the parents thought it was a bad idea, they said no. He argued. They, like good parents threatened with punishment.

The parents didn't just push over and say "Okay, whatever , just go to DC alone" No, they did what parents should do, they said no and they backed it up with punishment.

His parents tried to compromise, he said it was his way or no way, so *kaput*.

SAJN... I'm not trying to incite a flame war between you and I, but in all honesty, it really seems like your opinion of Parents is really too high...

I must agree with you on your points... to an extent anyway...

I do think he wasn't really right to argue with his parents, I know a lot of people do it, but it's really not the best way to go about getting something you want, at least I don't think so, other people have different opinions of that, and they're free to have them, if it's what works for them, then they can use it if they want, but I don't agree with it.

I can definitely understand his parents taking his door... but only because they thought he went to DC, but since he didn't go to DC, and I'm sure his parents know that at this point, I think he should be given his door back, although actually it IS his parents door since they're paying for the house and many of the things which make up the house (walls, doors, windows, floors, etc...)


But that's a bit besides the point I intended to make

Despite the fact that parents have a lot more "life experience" than your or I, doesn't mean they know what's best for us in every situation. Sometimes they don't know all of the factors in a situation and; therefore, they can't quite make the greatest decision for some situations. In this case, he's been to DC before, like he's said, he's even lived there before. As far as taking the metro there instead of having his parents drive him... it may not be as unsafe as his parents might think... if you think about it, it's not really more unsafe than if he drove himself there. It's possible that the metro isn't as bad as his parents (seemingly) think that it is (i say seemingly because I don't know if they've been on it before, 'nor do I know what kind of information his parents are basing this decision off of)

Basically, yes parents do have more experience than their kids, but that doesn't mean they always know what's best, even if it might seem like it. But that doesn't mean you should disrespect them, you'd be more likely to get something you want if your open to compromise, and talk about the situation calmly and clearly, at least in all of my experiences it is.

Wait, did I read that wrong? I said 'parents know what they are talking about', and you said 'no, no they don't.', and then I posted why they DO know what they are talking about. Unless we are both mixed up. Or maybe just I am mixed up.

Oh, I'm sorry. It's just (I realize you are talking about the parents) but you said adults (which seemed like a broad generalization) so I made one too based on my experience that adults mostly are about as clueless as any child or teenager or senior for that matter...That's my opinion...I just really don't like adults. :p

I agree with SAJN as well. While it's great that you got to see her and what not, DC isn't the greatest neighborhood to be in. I'm almost 17, and my parents would never even consider letting me go to Baltimore or DC by myself, let alone by myself, let alone to meet a person I've only met once or twice before.

And SAJN is also right about the 'you didn't show your maturity' bit. You ended up getting what you wanted in the end, and you still lost your door.

The 'we'll take away your door' punishment isn't a practical punishment so much as it is a mental one. It's saying "You have no where to hide, we don't trust you and we have to watch everything you do."

Oh, that was bad typing on my part. I meant parents, not adults in general. Heh, sorry.

Alright. I see what you meant now.

on a lighter note, I second this...you should totally do it!

Heh, hell no. I disagree with my parents all the time. My friends mom is a total *****. She kicked all of her sons out of the house the day they turned 18. She took my friend out of her will etc..She is a horrible parent. She doesn't watch her two 1 year old kids, she falls asleep on the couch watching TV everyday, while they play in the kitchen near knifes and stuff. Some parents are horrible, some are great, some are average. The reason I am fighting so strongly for the parents is because he was wrong and they were right. THIS TIME. For all I know his parents could be spawns of Satan. But that doesn't matter right now. What mattered was that he was wrong and his parents were right.

Also, don't worry, I know you won't start a flame war. See you stated your opinion/argument in a kind manner, and that's the way debates should be



I agree that parents aren't always right, but like I said above about them being right this time. If he lived in DC before doesn't that mean his parents did too ;). I mean, for some reason his parents didn't think the metro to DC was safe. You need to realize, it isn't worth seeing a girl. In a car you are by yourself, in a metro you are with many many other people. Even if the chance of him getting kidnapped or harmed are slim, his parents seemed to be just playing it safe.

I see, I think I just misunderstood what you were saying when you posted that, my apologies.



I understand what you're saying, but in all honesty I think it really just depends on where they're getting their information about the metro, it could be quite unsafe, but it could also be no less safe than going to a mall alone, just depends on where they're getting their info from, but either way they have their kid('s/s') best interest at heart, and just want them to be safe, so I can most definitely understand their decision.

I was just simply using that as an example to explain how their decision may not have been quite as good/informed as it could have been is all.

I haven't been to DC, so I can't argue, but I guess DC really isn't safe according to some friends...

SomeGuyOnAIM: heh
SomeGuyOnAIM: the DC metro /isn't/ safe
SomeGuyOnAIM: even if you're a twenty five year old man with shotguns for arms.
SomeGuyOnAIM: I was actually driving there today
SomeGuyOnAIM: I saw sixteen murders, five muggins, and thirty seven people get assulted.
SomeGuyOnAIM: A normal day in DC.

I haven't been there either... and yeah, if the metro is that bad, I definitely would have made the same decision his parents did, no way I'd want my kids alone on there.

Some of you think losing the door to your room is no big deal, but it's never happened to you. If it did, you'd feel much differently.

His parents may be a little over protective, but they are doing what they think is best for their son. The potentail punishment is a little steep in my opinion, but there could be other cirsumstances we don't know about.

Finally, losing your parents' trust is, quite possibly, one of the worst things you can do.

I think taking of the door is a very serious punishment and if my (future) kids ever get out of line majorly, I'll do it. While it is a harsh punishment, it gets its point across...

some guy on aim is completely bull****ting you then, because there is only one place in DC where that happens, and thats southeast DC. Her house is in Northwest, so i'm on the complete other side of the city than that.

Also, i should've noted earlier that i got my door back the second i came home and my parents noticed that i didn't go to DC.

For SAJN, i'd have to say that my parents were wrong, ONLY because they banned from the metro not because they thought it was dangerous, but because i went to see a movie two weeks ago and i came back an hour late due to the metro. So they said that i couldn't ride it anymore. Thats why they didn't want me to ride the metro. If i hadn't been late two weeks ago then they probably would've said yes if i asked.