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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → Religion is fun.
Religion is fun.
2005-05-10, 1:05 PM #1
There are thousands of religions out in the world. And many of them have "creative" qualities. So, let's make our own!

First, we need a scenario that would explain how the world existed. Any interesting ideas?

Please don't turn this into a flame war. [/color]
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
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2005-05-10, 1:07 PM #2
A small, cancerous lump in Brian's left ear.
the idiot is the person who follows the idiot and your not following me your insulting me your following the path of a idiot so that makes you the idiot - LC Tusken
2005-05-10, 1:07 PM #3
We need something better than an omniscient creator.. that one's too cliche. Oh! and there's a mandatory 10% tithing paid to me the church.
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2005-05-10, 1:09 PM #4
My favorite creation story is the Coyote Stories from Native American folklore....... go with something like that.
"Those ****ing amateurs... You left your dog, you idiots!"
2005-05-10, 1:13 PM #5
We are simply a snot rocket being shot through the vast space known as the great Snarkoid's kitchen.
"If you watch television news, you will know less about the world than if you just drink gin straight out of the bottle."
--Garrison Keillor
2005-05-10, 1:13 PM #6
The world was created in 1982 when a dinosaur on the planet Jupiter took a massive dump and it drifted to this area and Earth was created. Anyone who has memories before 1982 are all liars.
I can't think of anything to put here right now.
2005-05-10, 1:16 PM #7
There are already too many fascinating religions to need a new one.
2005-05-10, 1:23 PM #8
In the words of Reverend Love-GoY
Quote:
<GoY> religion is a personal subjective thing that can't be "argued" onto someone by a general objective debate
<GoY> and it's futile to try
<GoY> On the other hand, mode +b is a very objective thing indeed.
Holy soap opera Batman. - FGR
DARWIN WILL PREVENT THE DOWNFALL OF OUR RACE. - Rob
Free Jin!
2005-05-10, 1:25 PM #9
The sad thing is that most of the world's religions probably started out JUST like this.

"Hey guys! Let's make up a religion. In the process we can make ourselves wealthy and powerful!"
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2005-05-10, 1:30 PM #10
Quote:
Originally posted by Wolfy
A small, cancerous lump in Brian's left ear.


And when Brian decides to scratch it, we all die?

And, Schming share some!
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
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2005-05-10, 1:36 PM #11
Everyone knows that the universe was sneezed out by a being called the Great Green Arkleseizure.
Hey, Blue? I'm loving the things you do. From the very first time, the fight you fight for will always be mine.
2005-05-10, 2:15 PM #12
Quote:
Originally posted by - Tony -
Everyone knows that the universe was sneezed out by a being called the Great Green Arkleseizure.


I follow this religion.
2005-05-10, 2:17 PM #13
Well, if we're going to create a religion, we need a religious text.

Quite obviously, this religious text should be The Holy Post Your Desktop Thread.
the idiot is the person who follows the idiot and your not following me your insulting me your following the path of a idiot so that makes you the idiot - LC Tusken
2005-05-10, 3:13 PM #14
In which case, many of the verses will be about Jessica Alba.
2005-05-10, 3:22 PM #15
There won't be no virgin birth, then.
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2005-05-10, 3:31 PM #16
Our concsiences will be wiped clean with the coming of the great hankie!
2005-05-10, 4:02 PM #17
Quote:
Originally posted by Echoman
And when Brian decides to scratch it, we all die?

And, Schming share some!
You're all going down
2005-05-10, 4:44 PM #18
Quote:
Originally posted by Freelancer
The sad thing is that most of the world's religions probably started out JUST like this.

"Hey guys! Let's make up a religion. In the process we can make ourselves wealthy and powerful!"

Yes, pastors are quite wealthy. :rolleyes:



I say we take Futurama's example, where Bender got lost in space, and tiny humanoid life forms started growing on him. Those that could see him thought he was God, and everyone on his butt didn't believe he existed, despite the fact they were actually on him.
Catloaf, meet mouseloaf.
My music
2005-05-10, 4:47 PM #19
Quote:
Originally posted by Mort-Hog
There won't be no virgin birth, then.
Virgins are kinda rare, anyway. :p
Catloaf, meet mouseloaf.
My music
2005-05-10, 4:48 PM #20
Quote:
Originally posted by DogSRoOL
Yes, pastors are quite wealthy. :rolleyes:



I say we take Futurama's example, where Bender got lost in space, and tiny humanoid life forms started growing on him. Those that could see him thought he was God, and everyone on his butt didn't believe he existed, despite the fact they were actually on him.


I think he was more alluding to Roman Catholics in the Dark Ages. The priests/cardinals/etc etc. got quite wealthy off the people. But the religion was created before then, so I digress.
D E A T H
2005-05-10, 5:01 PM #21
Quote:
Originally posted by DogSRoOL
Virgins are kinda rare, anyway. :p


Because the majority of'em are here.
"We came, we saw, we conquered, we...woke up!"
2005-05-10, 6:28 PM #22
:(
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
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2005-05-10, 6:31 PM #23
Where did you get the idea that I was talking about a few, narrow forms of Christianity? I find it disturbing that you can't take "most of the world's religions" to mean anything other than Christianity. Second, what, was your religion created in modern times? Was I talking about contemporary pastors? No, not unless your religion was founded yesterday.
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2005-05-10, 6:52 PM #24
Back to the topic...

I suggest our symbol be this:
Attachment: 5024/relig_symbol.jpg (9,162 bytes)
the idiot is the person who follows the idiot and your not following me your insulting me your following the path of a idiot so that makes you the idiot - LC Tusken
2005-05-10, 7:36 PM #25
I think it needs to be a bit more sexier. ;)
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
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2005-05-11, 4:32 PM #26
Well, we could go with a non-omniscient creator. He just showed up and farted. Wham! the universe was born. In the meantime our creator is stoned out of his mind and watching all the pretty colors that are in his fart...
MithShrike: First Mateneer
Pimpin' Yerba Mate Drinker
2005-05-11, 4:47 PM #27
http://www.ucpress.edu/books/pages/2792.html

link to the Coyote Reader...

I wish I could find my book now...
"Those ****ing amateurs... You left your dog, you idiots!"
2005-05-11, 5:20 PM #28
It all began with the Monad. The Monad was the first conscious mind. The Monad gradually became stark raving mad. From this madness came delusions of the physical world, and they were perceived as real. The Monad also developed multiple personalities. The conflicting will of these personalities caused them to diverge into separate minds entirely (this is symbolised in the Bible with the story of the forbidden fruit).
I'm just a little boy.
2005-05-11, 5:31 PM #29
...And then I am sent to be your last and final hope.
Very funny Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.

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