Ok, I'll explain this as short and comprehensive as possible.

For the last 5 years, I have been with my girlfriend. For the 5 years we've been together, I've had to come to her house, she would never come to mine. In the last 5 years, she's probably been only a handful of times.

Her main excuse most of the time for not wanting to come over, is because my dad smokes cigarette's in the house. She says taht she is both allergic to the smoke, and she doesn't like it.

Today, she tells me she bought a pack of cigarette's (25 cigs) and has about less than half apack left. She has smoked this within a 2 month period, which to say the least, isn't all that much or that bad.

I totally lost it on her.

My reason?

She has been saying for the last 5 years that she is allergic to smoke and it boethers her and she doesn't want to come over because of that. Yes, there are other reasons (like dog hair, dirtyness, which I understand), but she uses the smoke one quite a bit.

Yet she smokes...And she inhales the smoke, she doesnt just puff it for fun.

It made me feel like she didnt even want to bother being around me, didn't want to sacrifice anything to see me (i.e.sucking it up for one night), because she ****ing smokes!!!

I mean, I realise smoking that little is not enough really, but still, you don't use that as an excuse to not come over when you smoke!!

Do you guys think I had a valid reason to get pissed off? Or did I overreact?

I'd say its a perfectly valid reason to be pissed off, but totally losing it with her was maybe over-reacting a wee bit.

The worst part is during our argument, she said she hated me. Then said she didnt mean it and she actually meant she hated what i was doing to her (meaning arguing/being mad).

Still, she could have said the latter part instead of "I Hate you". Ouch, anyone?

I make sure any new girlfriends of mine understand something.

1.) No drugs/poisons. This includes cigarrettes. Yes, it is a drug/poison.
3.) That is all.

she hates you because you're an arguing couple?

dude, i think you've got other things to work out, healthy relationships have craploads of arguing and people getting pissed off with each other from time to time.

Smack her around, I've never found being addicted to cigarettes attractive in regards to girls.

What's point 2.) ? :p

To Temperamental:

Sounds to me like she was making excuses... for some reason.

Upset, I suppose. Getting totally mad, meh.

/me dr. phils Temp

From my point of view, she isn't addicted.

I knew she had oneor two inher life before, thats normal, I could care lessif she smoked in fact fully.

It's not eventhe fact that she smoked, it's just the factthat she used "Im allergic" or "i dont like being around it" as an excuse to not come over, yet she was smoking herself.

Ask her why she really didn't want to go to your house since she's not being honest with you.

She said because it's dirty and full of dog hair (she is a clean freak)

That is an understandable excuse, I never challenged her on that. But the smoking one we had many many fights over.

Lies. Slander. Scandles. Sex. Propaganda.

Don't sweat it if she's mad at you. Just ignore her for a few days, and then talk about it later after both of you have had a chance to calm down. If she calls you during that time and wants to talk about it, thats cool, but dont call her.

Believe me Page, I don't intend on calling or talking to her for a fewdays most definately. It's actually one of her pet peeves, when I ignore her.

Punch her in the throat. She'll think it's sexy.

I wouldn't believe that excuse especially if it is known that you're not very meticulous. But do challenge that. Clean up your house, then invite her over. If she still refuses, then there is an underlying problem which will be detrimental to your relationship, IMO.