After Bush's turn is up, lets say, YOU ran for president, and were elected. What do you do?

I'd ask how the hell a Scottish guy ended up as President.

Then I think I'd celebrate.

I would disband and restructure both the legislative and judicial branches.

testicle tuesdays

I'd think "wow, at least I beat that Scottish guy, the American populace has more sense than that".

Then I'd teach them how to speak in the Queen's English and start taxing their tea.

I'd proclaim the second tuesday of every month Psyduck Awareness Day.

Take over Hawaii.

Ballot

[X] fishstickz

Annex Canada and Mexico, then liquefy the entire population of Africa for use as fuel in the top-secret mega-reactors of pure evil. Then I'd blow up Pluto for posing as a planet for so long.

demand emergency power as chancellor

destroy america... and thailand.... and ... any country with brown people.

then... declare myself emperor.... and bring back the ol empire.

if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}

I would do a jig.

[QUOTE=Vincent Valentine]I would disband and restructure both the legislative and judicial branches.[/QUOTE]
<3

In all seriousness... I'd gather my cabinet and lay out a plan for the next four years. Start by raising taxes across the board, with a curve roughly inverse to that you see with the current administration. This will go toward government funded alternate fuel source research.
I'll make sure my VP is a psychopathic woman who can make a man cry just by scratching the back of her hand. She will inform all those nice Big Oil people who funded my campaign that I'm going to destroy their main source of income. I will then have them all infected with AIDS. Within three months, there will be a cure.
Next on the agenda, the removal of the trade embargo with Cuba. We supply them with cable and Internet, we make good with Castro, eh, it's all good. Now... about those other places... namely... Iraq.
Now, I've been against the war in Iraq since it started, but now we're stuck. I can't think of many easy ways to get this situation under control. I'll probably... hmmm... We start by instituting the Draft, something that I'm vehemently against. Before we do so, we will require women to register with the selective service. I'm also vehemently against this, and i'll tell you why. Look at the anti-draft measures taken during Vietnam. Men would shoot themselves in the foot and such to avoid being drafted. Now, women have a special trick they can pull.
Get pregnant.
With my measures thus far, I have increased the population tenfold.
But I'm not finished.
We flood Iraq with soldiers and ALSO with pundits and politicians and brilliant statesmen and religious leaders and whatever they need us to flood them with until there's a frikkin' GOVERNMENT.
Once that's set up, we withdraw (nearly) all troops from Iraq.
We're going back to Afghanistan to get my ****ing Bin Laden. *******.
Seriously. The Afghanistan war was the war we needed after 9/11. We need Bin Laden put before a tribunal or whatever, and we need to get him. We need to get him good.
Now, four years are up. I've invented a viable alternate fuel source, cured AIDS, saved the Iraqi people, made peace with Cuba, expanded Women's Rights, and captured the mastermind behind 9/11. Hopefully, people will look past the fact that I'm a CG Despot and elect me again.
This is where the real fun begins.
Now, assuming there's no war still going on (a HUUUGE assumption to be making) I'll disband the Selective Service by citing it as a violation of the Third Amendment. Once it's gone, we increase military wages. And I don't just mean Army and Marines, I mean Navy and Coast Guard and National Guard and everything.
Remove the Gun show Loophole. A license is required for Hunting Knives. Increase funding to state departments of Health, Services, Family, Children, those sorts of things, in exchange for compliance with the "Children and Families Act" which will set guidelines for... you know, stuff. I'll put together an independent commission to come up with it, pass it along to congress, whatever.
Borders, borders, borders, what to do about borders... Close 'em. Both sides. Grant amnesty to any families living in America. After a while, open the borders, with some new security measures in place (all that jazzy stuff they want around there, you know). Legalize Prostitution, have it be covered under the Children and Families Act, tax it. Either legalize Mary-Jane or ban tobacco. Probably the first. Tax it.
Gay marriage... Create an amendment requiring states to recognize unions from all other states. Fiddle with Common-law.
Foreign affairs... Gonna want to help out Mexico, to reduce influx of immigrants. Terrorists? I don't know. Tell the FCC to reduce the state of hyper-fear that the media has induced in America, or else it must immediately disband. An example may be made of Bin Laden. Iran I'm going to try to get to relax with the whole bomb thing, but we're going to want to stick with the UN on this one.
North Korea, I'm gonna... I don't know. As far as I'm aware right now, Kim Jong Il is literally crazy. So, probably use covert methods to destroy the North Korean economy, culture, government, etc. Make the whole thing implode. Maintain the DMZ during this internal crisis so that South Korea doesn't try anything funny. Use the same covert methods to install a puppet democracy that, over time, evolves into an actual democracy, or else merges with South Korea.
Taiwan and China... that's a toughy. We're going to want some serious peace talks between the two, and save India for later. Once Taiwan and China are appeased, on to India. As we've discussed here before, far east Asia is the likeliest origin of World War III right now, and we don't want that.
Figure out how to let Russia manufacture something important for us so they can build up their economy. Make peace with France. Make formal apologies for the many times we've snubbed them over the years, possibly make some sort of reparations in return for the aid they gave us during the Revolution.
Now... Africa...
... This is a toughy.
We're going to need to flood the American consciousness with some serious pro-African propaganda. Get people to care about what's been happening on this continent. Stop the killing, stop the bloodshed. Get the UN involved. DO NOT SEND TROOPS TO AFRICA.
Other stuff... enhance the communications infrastructure of the nation and world. The more international the average person's view of the world, the better. Fund better fiber-optics in many nations, make the Web truly World Wide.
By now, time's up. I'll want to endorse someone who shares my values (maybe try cloning myself), but do not let my VP run. She'd destroy the world just to satisfy her murderous urges. After I've been replaced, I'll write a tell-all book about how I got all my ideas writing a post stream-of-consciousness on a Star Wars website eight years ago.

-The end.

thats all well and good, but i'll beat you in the elections because everyone wants Testicle Tuesdays.

I'd send Bush to Elba.

I'd pull our guys out of Iraq, no matter what.

Then I'd encourage a strict policy of isolationism.

I'd find ways to focus on helping Third World countries with their problems.

The US would continue getting over oil.

We'd place a renewed emphasis on exploring space and bettering ourselves.

Plus, I'd sleep in everyday. And host a late-night talk show.

I wouldn't live in the White House--or even Washington DC. I'd live in a nice house out in the country.

I'd have like two Secret Service guys. I'd learn how to handle myself, so between the three of us...nothing'd happen.

I'd drive myself and fly myself everywhere.

My mom would cook my meals.

I'd be single and go out with any woman who dug me for my power.

All my friends from college would live with me till we got married. And they wouldn't have to work. Or if they did, they'd have really flexible schedules.

Plus I'd like to kick out everybody in Congress and elect/appoint people who didn't care about politics when the old folks were in there.

And I'd run on the Independent ticket.

I would have Jack Thompson hung for high treason.

First I'd completely pull out of Iraq and explain very nicely to the people that we tried to help, but you're far to immature to be a successful democracy, and which them luck with what ever new dictator they set up. Then every time they get uppity, we carpet them. That solves that.

Then I'd play mean psychological tricks on the UN and convince them that sending troops to fix up Africa is key to them getting very large bonuses. And on alternate Wednesdays they switch job with the janitors.

Then I'd probably make a bunch of arbitrary laws just to annoy special interest groups that are particularly obnoxious.

Then, because the American people are idiots, people would be elected via UT 2004 DM ladders, and congress would spend all day safely LAN partying.

Then I'd force Californians to use hydrogen powered cars so they can find out why they are a bad idea.

After that I'd spend a lot on the military so we can get some new guns and tanks into games.

Three words: reign of terror

First and foremost, I would exfiltrate Iraq and Afghanastan immediately and cease all other imperialistic activities. I would then adopt a foreign affairs strategy which attempts to increase our credibility with the world by actually being part of the world instead of bullying it.

Second, I would reverse Bush's economic policies that benefit primarily the rich at the expense of the poor, and reprimand state governments that attempt similar shenanigans. I would also attempt to severely diminish the power and size of state governments.

Third, I would outlaw lobbying in all forms immediately and eject all politicians who've taken these bribes in the past five years.

Fourth, I would attempt to restore our government's system of checks and balances. The power of the executive branch would be severely neutered, and the power of the judiciary would be brought up to par. The anti-corruption measures discussed earlier would keep congress in line.

Fifth, I would attempt to put a dent in Bush's historic deficit. This isn't hard. It pretty much involves prohibiting deficit spending (effective the start of my term).

Sixth, all government surveillance programs would be immediately halted and disbanded forever.

Seventh, I would have a frank discussion with the citizens of the United States about the latest craze, terrorism. Basically I would attempt to repair the damage Bush has done to all of us in the name of preventing it. Mostly by restoring civil rights which have been revoked for the "war on terror."

Eighth, there would be massive cuts to federal programs. Especially education. The federal government would be at least 1000% more effective for 1/10th the cost, and would focus on programs real people need.

Ninth, would be education reform. America would be transformed from pathetic, paper-pushing, administrative-overhead leeches on the world to scientists, innovaters, and intelligent people. We would reclaim our scientific heritage.

Tenth, economic freedom would be severely limited for the rich and limitless for the poor. It's really that simple. The richer you are, the more say the government has in what you can do with your money. And if it involves screwing the poor, the government will simply take your money and give it to the poor.

Eleventh, the government would provide the necessities of life. This is fairly straightforward. Our current government provides us with cheap water (free if obtained publicly for personal use). Yet it fails to provide us with one of the fundamentals of life: shelter. I'm not saying everyone has to live in government-issued housing, as that might dampen the spirits of some. I'm saying that if America has homeless citizens, then America is pathetic. How many homeless citizens could we get off the streets if we had spent 300 billion dollars on THEM instead of an absolutely fruitless war? It cost us 300 billion dollars to do nothing except alienate the world. JESUS H. CHRIST! WE COULD HAVE DONE THAT FOR FREE. WHY NOT ****ING USE THAT MONEY FOR SOMETHING REAL PEOPLE ACTUALLY NEED, *********!

Yeah, I am fairly certain I would be hailed as the greatest president ever and America would be approaching utopia status as I left office.

It's not hard. Actually all it really takes is a president that can ward off the personal temptations of corruption. History shows this time and time again.

I would be Hitler 2.0

I would build a spacefleet to wreak havoc on the surface of Venus for being such a crappy planet. Then after the the drugs began to take hold, I'd blow Planet X away before it swings by the inner Solar System again and throws everything out of whack. I will forever be remembered as the Great Emperor and Savior of the Solar System, not some lowly US president.

Play videogames, get drunk, go bowling with the secret service.

Free beer.

Vote Spork 2008

I'd appoint Freelancer as my personal executive and let him run things while I retreat with my harem.

Something other than desert wars.

Like, hmm, conquering space with LASERS.