I really don't like making threads about my relationship issues, but in this case I'm thinking that hearing from others who have been in this situation might help.

Background:
My ex-girlfriend and I broke up in December. We had been going out 3.5 years, and ultimately she realized that she couldn't be with me because she's very religious and I'm agnostic. The break-up isn't really what this thread is about.

I took the break-up really well. There were aspects of the relationship that I wasn't happy with, and I guess I had my doubts that it was going to work. I've moved on and am seeing another girl. She (my ex) moved across the continent and is with another guy.

Here's my question. Every time I see a picture of them together (facebook, msn user picture, etc) I just get this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. Seeing her with somebody else is just incredibly hard for some reason, even though I've well moved on. I guess it's kind of a territorial, "she's mine" kind of thing. Really primal, I guess. But yeah, does that ever go away?

Don't worry, the feeling should fade with time.

I hope so. We don't hate each other or anything, the break was clean, so it'd be nice to still be able to talk to her.

It's been a month. You don't just get over someone you were with for three and a half years. It takes time, booze and hookers.

a week for every month.

[edit] moved to pm

In my experience, not really. The best thing to do is just stop looking at pictures of her, and focus on the new.

Yeah, that's why I had to cut her out. I can't stand to think of her happy with someone else, and I hate myself for that.

I broke up like.. 6 months ago. Still on my mind sometimes, though I no longer want her back.

Due to me being agnostic as well, I have a hard time trying to find the right lady.

It is perfectly normal to have those emotions upon seeing those pictures.

Like Bobbert said, the feeling should fade with time.

EDIT: And your quote is still in my sig, so you should feel happy

If it makes you feel any better, I just ate the most delicious egg roll from a local Asian cuisine place called Lin's Garden.

Hurts like a b***** for a long time. Then it only hurts a little.

Time doesn't heal all wounds - it just dulls the pain.

b*****?

That's what she'd want to know

beotch

Not really, you just stop noticing it as much, and stop seeking those things that remind you of her.

Good luck man.

I keep a few pictures of my ex (of a year and a half, broke up this summer) around. I don't keep them visible, but it doesn't feel right to throw them away or destroy them.

It, of course, depends on the situation, but I don't like to deny or hide or try to forget a year and a half of my life.

I wanna break up with someone...

Kill her

with fire

it'll go away.
best cure is going on a binge. as many as you can in as little time as you can. you don't have to tell anyone or brag about it, it'll just help you. :/ really.

Tell her you're pregnant.

.

.

I really want to know how this works too. I have been going back and forthe between the same two girls for like 5 years now.

Im with the one i really love ( if you saw my last thread the "whore" ) andi broke up with the one that was really good to me, aside from being a controling *****.

Yet, i do not care for this *****., yet the thought of her with someone else and not me, that is really pissing me off, and its only been like 21 days, seince the break up.

I dont know, how dose one just let that go?

I kept the letters, birthday present, pictures.. All stashed away where I don't see them, but I couldn't throw the stuff away. No matter I how I look at it, That was a damned good year of my life and I'd like to be able to look back and remember it that way. However, my second relationship sucked and i try to stay away from her as much as possible.

I can tell you that in my experience it doesn't really get any better. It hurts less, but whenever I see a picture of my ex anywhere I get the same pit. What's worse, is I'm a protective person. So periodically I'll check her blog to see how her life is going and whatnot. Apparently she installed some script to track logged in users, and sent me an email that was seemingly benign. Just a, "hey, what's up. How are you?" type of deal, but it made me want to puke.

I left HER because she was using drugs and doing other things that I didn't agree with. So I can only imagine how long it would last if I got dumped.

Pff, I bet the egg roll I ate tasted MUCH better than the one you ate. I ate it at a Vietnamese Noodle place called Pho 2000.

With a guy she's been "with" for a month? Pretty quick after the breakup for such a major move.

This. (however immoral)

Emphasizing

Yeah, I'd never get rid of this stuff. I don't really have a lot of it, but after I broke up with my ex we decided not to have any contact for a few months, to give us both a chance to get over it. My birthday fell during the period of no contact and he broke the rules to send me a card and a beautiful letter. I come across it every so often and it always makes me smile (and feel sad). But it's worth the pain to remember the good times. It does take time though. I'll also emphasise the booze option, though I'd recommend booze and friends, rather than hookers.

It often varies from one person to another. I've had friends break-up with their girlfriends and really be fine within days, whereas I've met others who were depressed and having a terrible time for, honestly, well over a year.

In my case, love quickly flipped on its head and became hate because she'd cheated on me. I'm not sure if that made it harder or easier in and of itself, but it took me a while to get over it. I'd say a couple of months where I had a terrible time and then it faded. However, even a year and a half past now, I still get jolts of pain, or a sad thought now and again, especially if I think where I could be, had things not gone horribly wrong, had she been faithful and had that child actually been mine.

Bah, I'm ranting. I guess what I'm trying to say is try and let the thoughts of this fade away. Focus on your new woman, enjoy time with her, spoil her and try to bring some happiness. At least for me, seeing my woman's smile always makes me forget the woes of life.

wtbGirlfriend plzkthnx ;_; (:awesome:)

Yeah it goes away... 3.5 years is a long time, it tooke me about 6 months or so to get over that feeling after my 18month relationship... So, just give it time, and be glad you found someone better.

They were good friends, and she'd always wanted to move away from here, only reason she was staying was that I went to school here. But yeah, it's a reckless and stupid thing to do. Isn't my place to judge, though.

As for the recommendations of going on a binge, I've pretty much got that covered. Been partying pretty hard for the past month. It helps.

I had some bad experiences with girls in high school, and over time I definitely feel a lot better about it than I did back then. Obviously nothing like being with someone for 3.5 years and then suddenly not, but I'm hoping eventually I'll feel about my ex the way I do about those girls.

Thanks for the words of encouragement, all.

Can I be one of the hookers friends?