Post your funny stories from life, or funny stuff from the internet, whatever. For content, I shall post what just happened to me:

A long while back, I transferred my Roth IRA to a new company. When they moved the funds, for some stupid reason they left $0.01 in the old account at my bank. So it sat for a while, as I waited to see if it would eventually be moved as well, because I mean, who would do that? But sure enough, after a couple months, it was still there. So I went to my bank teller and told them about it, and they said they'd pass it on about closing the account completely.

Today, months later, I have received the fruits of said account closure. A check for $0.01. An actual, printed, official, mailed check. Needless to say, the pure absurdity of it had me laughing for quite a while.

You don't work with people, do you?

Because trust me, they'll get someone who will raise a stink about stealing a penny. It's only a matter of time.

Oh I'm sure that's why, but the fact that it ever came to it was just hilarious, not to mention it appeared as if they were perfectly happy attempting to invest $0.01 in the market.

Haha you should totally put that check in a frame and hang it.

My dad got a cheque for £0.00 from the Inland Revenue last year.

Tossers.

Requisite Bash.org post:

<wolf> 1. Save every Free Credit Card Offer you get, Put it in pile A
<wolf> 2. Save every Free Coupon You get, put that in pile B
<wolf> 3. Now open the credit card mail from pile A and find the Business
Reply Mail Envelope.
<wolf> 4. Take the coupons from pile B and stuff them in the envelope you hold
in your hand.
<wolf> 5. Drop the stuffed to the brim envelopes in your mail and walk away
whistling.
<wolf> I have now received two phone calls from the credit card companies
telling me that they received a stuffed envelope with coupons rather
then my application. They informed me that it they are not pleased that
they footed the bill for the crap I sent them. I reply with "It says
Business Reply Mail" I'm suggesting coupons to you to ensure that your
business is more successful. They promptly hang up on me.
<wolf> Now, I did this for about a month before it got boring, so I got an
added idea! I added exactly 33 cents worth of pennies to the envelope
so they paid EXTRA due to the weight. I got a call informing me about
the money, I said it was a mistake and I demanded my change back. After
yelling at the clerk and then to the supervisor they agreed to my
demands and cut me a check for the money. I hold in my hand at this
very moment a check from GTE Visa for exactly 33 cents.

Duds, I have you on facebook, I totally need to see a picture of this check.

I got a .10 cent check once but you got me beat.

I recently received a check from my apartment complex I lived in while overseas for when I was without hot water for a couple days. That happened almost a year and a half ago, and I received my security deposit a loooooong time ago. It was nice to receive a check for 50 bucks

A friend of mine got a chequing account in grade school, and he wrote his first (custom, Toronto Maple Leafs) cheque #1 to me for $1.00, with the memo "Spend wisely."

The funny thing is, there have been many times where his account has been overdraft or whatever and he begged me not to cash it, because if I cashed that it would cost him like 10 bucks. I think I still have the cheque somewhere; it still makes me laugh thinking of our antics as 12 y/o kids.

this topic is now about cheques!

I have a checkbook somewhere but I don't use it because only senior citizens still use something as foolish, inefficient, and downright dangerous as a check in this day and age.

-Seriously, people. It's called debit. Look it up.

It has only taken me 8 years to get through my first transaction register. I'm on check 167 after all that time.

I've had a cheque book for about 8 years. I've never written a cheque in my life.

I once deposited the difference ($1200) from a college grant check in to my bank. I got a call several weeks later with the purpose of apologizing for an error that they had made. Apparently another fellow by the same name noticed that he suddenly acquired said amount out of thin air. I thanked them for their honesty, suggested that they begin verifying account numbers upon transaction & closed my account.

I was once wrongfully accused of stealing jewelry from a home in my neighborhood because the police had followed my tracks in the snow, which apparently intersected with a thief. My tracks led them first to a neighbors yard where I had built a life-size nude female body out of snow (complete with breasts & vagina). I had actually seen the police out my window before they approached me, laughing over my creation but was unaware of what I'd soon be accused of. I calmly went in to the kitchen, prepared my defense (I just happened upon it on my way home) & waited. My mother made the mistake of allowing them to enter our home (my father was a bit brighter but wasn't present). A few of them immediately started looking around while a detective & an officer began questioning me. To my surprise it wasn't about the sexy sculpture at all. They asked me if I had happened "to steal $3000 worth of jewelry from someone's home at approximately 10AM" that morning. I was confused but stated that I had not. The officer started yelling at me & called me a "****ing liar" (he was playing "bad cop" apparently). The detective (whom I assume was playing "good cop") congratulated me on my snow sculpture & pretended to just want the stolen goods back. My mother was in tears, obviously believing that I had done it & was on the phone with my father at work. He told her to demand that they leave & they did, but not before they took my shoes to match them up with the snow "prints". They returned my shoes within the hour, never apologized for the accusations & rudeness & we never heard back from them on this particular matter again. I assume that they either apprehended a suspect or at least that they eventually recognized the fact that there were several other intersecting snow tracks as well.

I was once clothes-lined by a clothes-line. It was dark, we were playing "ninja", I was running through a yard that I was familiar with & the next thing I know, my legs are in the air, higher than my head & I'm landing on my back & the wind leaves my lungs. The sick thing is that I was then attacked by other "ninjas" (one was beating me with a jump-rope & another a mop stick) & was incapable of saying anything other than "hhhuuuggghhh". Once the beating was over & the air returned to my lungs I told those mother****ers what had happened. They merely laughed & resumed beating me.

got a check for $1.03 for overpaying my last car payment.

Okay guys, funny story:

Once upon a time there was this businessman, right? Most of his businesses were complete failures, with him often reneging on his personal and business debts. People still thought of the man as a highly-skilled executive. He was terrible at business, but very good at marketing himself.

The businessman was a registered Democrat, believe it or not. Anyway, this businessman decided he wanted to become the President of the United States. The Democrats thought he was a joke, so he ran as an independent. A good, moderate platform, too: pro-choice, instituting universal healthcare, in favor of middle-class tax cuts, abolishing the estate tax, free trade and a large one-time levy on all rich people. He didn't win, obviously. Who would throw their vote away on an independent?

The businessman grew jaded, misanthropic and opportunistic. The years passed, and his businesses continued to fail, his creditors continued to have to sue him to get loan payments, and he continued to market himself as a success. He satisfied his bloated ego by mocking new college grads on a television show, for which no genuinely successful CEO would have the time. Eventually, the businessman felt the time was right to try again.

He thought about the Democrats, the party he loved... but he knew they would never support him. The businessman had spent his entire career marketing himself as a self-entitled rich white baby boomer, and he was reviled by everyone except other self-entitled rich white baby boomers. He knew he had only one chance: he registered as a Republican. He changed his platform to oppose everything he ever thought, and sold the whole package to the self-entitled rich white racist baby boomers at Tea Party/neo-fascist rallies. He knew, finally, that he had a chance.

And Trump would have gotten away with it, too, if he hadn't tried to claim that Obama isn't an American citizen.

Vote Trump/Palin in 'NaN.

That story is a lot less funny if you live in the US.

Birtherism would be humorous if the fanatics that subscribed to it (& the ones that are being intellectually dishonest by giving the subscribers a forum) weren't so influential. I already personally know a few people who would love to vote for Trump if given the chance. When I asked one of these people why they were more willing to believe Trump than Fukino they replied "do you honestly think that someone that wealthy could be dumb enough to put their reputation on the line if there wasn't something to it?" These people are perfectly fine with dismissing McCain actually being born in another country (not that I'm suggesting that he's not a Naturalized Citizen). He's just too much of a "patriot" I guess. I think that this birther thing is more wide-spread amongst Republicans & tea-baggers than most of us would imagine.

Woohoo, way to threadcrap.

NoESC, I got the same type of check when I paid off my car last year. Mine was $10 or so I think. The reason for those checks is because they usually give you a payoff amount that's good until a certain date, but if you pay it off before that date, you actually owe less interest, so they're repaying you the extra interest that you paid.

Me or Jon'C? I just figured that it was over since everyone is just posting stupid "har har I got a check" stories. Surely there are some humorous non-check stories that someone could tell. CM didn't call the thread "stupid check stories".

The other day I went into a shop and it was absolutely boiling inside. I said to the guy behind the counter that it must have been over 90 degrees in there and he told me to stop being so obtuse.

Haha...good one. Hadn't heard it that way before.

The greatest tragedy of the climbing income gap is the fact that America's rich are now so stupid and out of touch with reality that they actually believe global warming is a liberal conspiracy to steal their gold.

A 5% loss in profits to prevent an apocalyptic release of methane sequestered in arctic permafrost?? Like hell, lie-berals.

A 2% raise so our own employees can buy the products we create, ensuring that our company continues to exist ten years from now? **** that, I retire in 9.

I think the most amusing part is that Joncey is actually playing with the idea of Trump running, and winning the presidency.

I think it's remarkable that you think it's impossible for an idiot failed businessman who presents an image of success to win the presidency. Did you forget about 2000 and 2004 already?

Oh, Trump is going to run. No two-faced ****-for-brains baby boomer is going to be coy and cute about something they don't plan on doing.

I'm definitely not worried about him winning.

At this point any one on the side of the income gap that Trump isn't who doesn't vote democrat is an idiot. Even if the democrats are wrong about everything, at least they don't believe in that 'trickle down' nonsense.

One time while I was still working at the porn store, I got clubbed in the dick with a dick.