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ForumsDiscussion Forum → Serial butt slasher
Serial butt slasher
2011-07-28, 2:54 PM #1
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/43889408/ns/local_news-washington_dc/t/serial-butt-stabber-sought-virginia

Discuss
2011-07-28, 3:02 PM #2
+1
TAKES HINTS JUST FINE, STILL DOESN'T CARE
2011-07-28, 5:09 PM #3
I used to go to that mall when I lived in Fairfax. Can't say I'm that surprised.
"I'm afraid of OC'ing my video card. You never know when Ogre Calling can go terribly wrong."
2011-07-28, 7:29 PM #4
dear god why!? were they attractive butts? that would compound the tragedy!
Welcome to the douchebag club. We'd give you some cookies, but some douche ate all of them. -Rob
2011-07-29, 3:09 AM #5
Butt cutter/ass slasher is a hero of the people.
2011-07-29, 4:11 AM #6
****. They're on to me.
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2011-07-29, 4:30 AM #7
I'd go down the middle and see if they noticed anything skiffing through their buttcrack.
nope.
2011-07-29, 5:48 AM #8
I go to that mall sometimes. My best friend works there in her second job. Despite the fact that none of us want it to happen to us, we still can't help but chuckle a little when talking about it because, dear god, what the hell is wrong with the DC area?

But he's using a box cutter, which I think makes it all even worse, because those things are not clean. It's bad enough to get slashed in the butt without compounding it by getting an infection. Of the ass. Ew.
Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.
2011-07-29, 7:41 AM #9
What a bummer for those shoppers. The bottom line, ass far as I can tell is he must have just cracked. He's rearly cheeky to think he can get away with such behavior. Butt at least he's not a killer.

edit: Had to squeeze something in.
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2011-07-29, 10:55 AM #10
Originally posted by Ni:
What a bummer for those shoppers. The bottom line, ass far as I can tell is he must have just cracked. He's rearly cheeky to think he can get away with such behavior. Butt at least he's not a killer.

edit: Had to squeeze something in.


:neckbeard:
2011-07-29, 11:01 AM #11
In heinydsight I should have posteriored "I'd like to see him behind bars." I guess I wasn't anal enough with my pun searching. I'm sure if he was caught, he wouldn't be over the moon and he'd probaby be let off with a slap
on the wrists anyway unless he had other weapons in his arsenal because derriere probably isn't enough evidence.


Sorry I just can't help myself :P
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2011-07-29, 1:27 PM #12
You're an ass.
nope.
2011-07-29, 1:40 PM #13
I can see this has become the ass end of everyone's jokes.
I can't wait for the day schools get the money they need, and the military has to hold bake sales to afford bombs.
2011-07-29, 2:22 PM #14
well we are at the ass end of the internet
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2011-07-29, 6:06 PM #15
:-/

At least the stabbings aren't accompanied by a whispered "Welcome to the world of AIDS."

It's a perversely amusing news story, but there are so very many reasons it could suddenly and permanently become unfunny.

Afterthought: Alternatively, the butt-slasher could be an alien invader taking tissue samples. Or I could just be overthinking this.
2011-07-29, 7:43 PM #16
...wtf
Epstein didn't kill himself.

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