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ForumsDiscussion Forum → Vent your job incidents here...
Vent your job incidents here...
2016-05-22, 1:18 PM #1
As you all know,I live in a **** hole, and I am no stranger to **** from customers. I start off by only telling one story, and from there let others tell their own.

I am a freelancer who does odd jobs of recording and editing social events, web dev, corporate video, product photography, etc. Most of my clients are local, every now and I then someone from another city will contact me for my services, usually by word of mouth of recommendation.

Last year, a lady called because I was recommended by someone whose wedding I recorded. I charged that person 3,500 pesos (190 usd) for the whole service (recording, editing, photography, prints, etc), which is considered a normal price in this region of the country.

This lady owns a ballroom and offers banqueting services. She wanted to make a 1:30 to 2:00 minute promotional video of what she does. After taking a bit to make an estimate, I bid the job at 5,000 pesos (272 usd). She called me up the same day, and boy was I in for a shock:

The first thing she did was call me out on trying to take advantage of her. In her limited obsolete mind, I should not charge her more per minute than the average price of minute for the wedding video. The wedding video had a runtime of 55 minutes, which means an average of 63 pesos (3.43 usd). This lady wanted me to do the job for 126 pesos (6.86 usd). I have only heard of people like this, but had never had the unfortunate experience of actually trying to do business with one. I explained to her that a wedding was a job where quantity was preferred over quality, and that there is no comparison. In her commercial I was going to use a lot more sophisticated equipment (a jib, slider, steadycam, light kits), animation, professional voice over work, etc. At the end she didn't get it, threatened to expose me and complain to some syndicate/guild of photographers (which I don't even belong to) and never would allow me to work in her ballroom (and I have not met a single person who has rented her ballroom to this date). Of course I was pissed, especially when I found out she rents the ballroom with her banqueting services at a starting price of 20,000 (1089 usd) pesos and scales it according to how many guests you'll accommodate.

I have plenty of other stories, but this is the one that popped into my head last night while talking to a colleague who has had similar things happen to him.

Ok then, your turn.
Nothing to see here, move along.
2016-05-22, 9:39 PM #2
i work in an automotive shop... there is no end to the stupid

you changed my oil now my [something] doesn't work is the big one... and then there is the "i am/was a mechanic" line when we try to explain why we are declining some service... most commonly the flat repair on the tire with sidewall damage, bald, dryrot, overly large object, object at extreme angle, or a combination of things that we won't touch
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2016-05-22, 10:42 PM #3
Wacky customers, eh.

This one time, a middle-aged Eastern European woman comes in so I ask for her ID card. So she pulls out a rather moist old ID card from between her breasts. I carefully picked up the card and quickly checked its validity. It had expired some time ago, so there was nothing I could do to help her. Inane argument ensues, during which I got tongue-tied, called her "Sir" and didn't correct myself since I only realized it about 1.5 seconds later when she was already continuing her tirade (not that she noticed it either). In the end she storms off and tells me: "YOU WILL NOT GO TO HOLLYWOOD!". The whole interaction was in English, and those were her exact words.

Trés rude.
Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum
2016-05-22, 11:45 PM #4
Your story reminds me of Papers, Please, Nikumubeki.
? :)
2016-05-23, 1:52 AM #5
Quite fitting, Mentat, since I've been 'playing' Papers, Please for roughly 8 hours a day for almost 8 years now. :P
Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum
2016-05-23, 3:25 AM #6
"I won't pay you, but it'll be good for your portfolio."

"I'll pay you in stock."

"You're charging me money? But we're friends."

"I came up with the idea, so we'll split it 50/50."

"I won't invest in your company unless you move it to the most expensive city on the planet."

"Your LinkedIn says you are an architect/systems programmer. But it also says you used Python 10 years ago, so here's a midlevel Perl job you might be interested in."

"I was a terrible engineer and I haven't done it since I became a manager, but here's a technical decision:"

"You're responsible for [new product] scalability. You don't need any say over the architecture, database schema, file formats, protocols, how key systems are implemented, which poorly-performing legacy components we will reuse, or which executive bait vaporware we'll integrate for political reasons. You're just responsible for making it scale."

"We're really impressed with the work you've been doing on [product], and we very badly want to poach you. Please let us know when we can subject you to our tech interview process."

"[Free / Hobby / Unsellable] project is [taking too long / missing feature nobody else wants]. You should [work on it full time without pay / prioritize my needs above all others without pay]."

"We're running behind. Let's schedule a meeting..."

"Your project is on schedule, so that means you have time to help with [x]."



If I had a nickel for:

- Every time I've intentionally shipped a bug
-- because management does not really value product quality, even though they claim to.
-- because our release process is so rigid that nobody is willing to make late changes, even for critical issues.

- Every time I've made people revert their changes
-- because the change didn't fix the problem it was supposed to fix.
-- because it completely broke the product in other ways, but the developer never even tried it first.
-- because it wasn't ready to ship, but was pushed anyway because our deadline-oriented release process encourages 'cramming'.

- Every time I've thought about quitting / changing careers / going Galt

- Every time I have actually quit, and got offered more money to stay, and took it, because I am my stupid reptilian hind-brain.

- Every pointless meeting I've been required to attend
-- because management/sales doesn't understand the product/company/their job well enough to answer questions without R&D present.
-- because a junior engineer sent a poorly worded e-mail to their manager.
-- because some manager is bored / has uninformed opinion of project risk.
-- because it is required by our process.
-- to discuss reducing the number of meetings.

- Every important meeting that has been skipped / rescheduled
-- because one person is sick.
-- because one unimportant manager is busy.
-- because we are behind, and only have time for the pointless meetings right now.

- Every (big-a) Agile backfire:
-- Daily scrums, which rapidly mutate into biweekly hour-long meetings
--- because managers demand constant status updates, but are too "busy" to attend daily meetings.
--- because managers book time in 30-60 minute blocks / have too much to discuss.
--- because engineers save all of their questions for the team meeting, instead of promptly asking individual members.
--- to continue the email thread / IM chat from right before the meeting started.
-- Short sprints, which fail
--- because systems work is too big / complicated to turn around in a single sprint, so they are effectively ignored.
-- Frequent release to get faster feedback, which fails
--- because major features are too big / complicated to turn around in a short release, so important work is left unprioritized.
--- because the release process isn't changed / can't be compressed, and eventually dominates development time.
--- because most customers are tech conservative and don't run minor releases / anything less than 2 years old.

- Every time I've been assigned at the last minute to write a report / deliver a presentation
-- because a manager forgot they were supposed to do it
-- because a manager tried, but cannot do it

- Every time a junior/mid has borked up a project
-- because they were told how to do something and didn't listen / intentionally disregarded the advice.
-- because they started with the most complicated change, and can't get their code to compile again.
-- because they took too long / complained / can't justify progress, and now management thinks the project is high risk.

- Every time a senior/principal has borked up a project
-- because they were asked to produce data / a report to justify implementing a feature, but implemented the feature instead.
-- because they didn't understand something, and instead of asking questions they behaved randomly.
-- because the spec wasn't detailed enough / was open-ended, and they don't know the code well enough to make good decisions.
-- because the spec was too detailed, so they didn't read it.

- Every time a senior/principal doesn't know how to use their own product outside of a test harness, and doesn't care to learn.

- Every time someone has asked me to sign an NDA before discussing their idea
-- because they've radically overestimated the value of an idea.
-- because they've radically overestimated my interest in hearing about it.
2016-05-23, 6:09 AM #7
"I like the outline around that picture. We should use that, but make it half as thick."

- "It's one pixel wide. You can't make it smaller."

"Just make it half a pixel."

- "A pixel is the smallest unit we have. We can't make it smaller."

"I know that a pixel is the smallest unit. Just make it half a pixel!"
Sorry for the lousy German
2016-05-23, 7:58 AM #8
Originally posted by Impi:

"I know that a pixel is the smallest unit. Just make it half a pixel!"


that's where you wait a minute, give them the exact same thing, and tell them it's half a pixel
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2016-05-23, 8:02 AM #9
Originally posted by DrkJedi82:
that's where you wait a minute, give them the exact same thing, and tell them it's half a pixel


I think that's actually what we ended up doing.
Sorry for the lousy German
2016-05-23, 10:05 AM #10
"Don't worry about downtime, it just reminds our customers why they pay us. If the systems never go down, they'll forget why they pay our fees." -- one of my employers, until 2 days of downtime cost us our second-biggest client. Thankfully I wasn't involved in that project and didn't get the blame. >_>

Originally posted by Jon`C:
If I had a nickel for...

You don't sound jaded at all, Jon.
And when the moment is right, I'm gonna fly a kite.
2016-05-23, 12:34 PM #11
I don't have a job anymore, which is nice, because the state is paying for my undergraduate.

Do have to deal with bull**** from the UC system, they allow only two for-credit graduate courses, on the quarter system so I can only take one series with a bunch of bureaucratic hoops to jump through. Also can't get financial aid for summer courses because they only teach classes for idiots during the summer, and you need at least 6 units of courses which I only need 5 for breadth. So I'm studying knot theory this summer under the guidance of a pretty good topologist. Which sucks because he's teaching graduate topology which I now can't take. At least I'll get to study category theory in algebra with a good algebraist who probably won't mentor anything. ****ty letter of recommendation scenario but at least my GPA is fine. Also **** studying for the GRE, nobody wants to solve hard integrals.
2016-05-23, 2:51 PM #12
The entire summer I spent working at a national lab, and realized how absurd the American defense budget is while getting paid a pittance as an engineering intern. Manager kept talking about how I'm going to save them so much money doing this analysis of COTS $30 switches to replace $10k switches on equipment.

The first non-theory research project I was given and told to use a program written by a physicist. I now realize the utility of my EE/CS background when doing physics work.
I had a blog. It sucked.
2016-05-23, 6:51 PM #13
Originally posted by Jon`C:
"I won't pay you, but it'll be good for your portfolio."

"I'll pay you in stock."

"You're charging me money? But we're friends."

"I came up with the idea, so we'll split it 50/50."

"I won't invest in your company unless you move it to the most expensive city on the planet."

Not gonna quote everything.


Ye are the most afflicted of all.

At this point, all I want is a simple stable job I could do from home, 40 to 50 hours a week, and make 1000 to 1500 usd.
Nothing to see here, move along.
2016-05-24, 12:24 AM #14
Am I the only person here that thinks $270 is retardedly cheap for filming/editing/producing a wedding video? I've never gotten married (thank god) but that seems incredibly cheap. Maybe just cause Mexico is CHEAP and POOR!

(jk I love you, Gold.)
2016-05-24, 1:48 AM #15
Originally posted by Reid:
I don't have a job anymore, which is nice, because the state is paying for my undergraduate.


Ah, that reminds me. In Germany, when you are getting unemployment benefits your applications can be paid for by the government. Including cost of paper, printing, mailing, etc. and also driving to an interview. But only if you do boring standard applications that will only get you hired in boring standard jobs. The designer we hired did of course (like every other applicant) a beautifully designed portfolio with all her nicest works and she got jack **** by the government because it wasn't a standard application. Of course it was more expensive than a standard application but she didn't even get the standard amount to recover some of the costs.

She was hired so it wasn't that big of a deal but I wonder how many people are still unemployed because they let themselves be bullied by the government into writing bad applications.
Sorry for the lousy German
2016-05-24, 7:04 PM #16
Because paying for a standard application is the same as bullying anyone making a fancy application.
2016-05-25, 11:29 AM #17
The programmers next door to me spend all day, every day, loudly complaining about stupid ways other programmers wrote their code

Do all programmers hate each other's code? This seems to be a commonality
2016-05-25, 12:43 PM #18
No.

Super junior developers are obsessed with code cleanliness and complain constantly about it. They grouse about how the company should give up its entire competitive advantage to do a clean rewrite. 100% this attitude has nothing to do with real product quality concerns (quality is proven to decrease following rewrites). People who obsess over this are usually masking anxieties about uncertainties or an inability to deal with unfamiliar code bases, or they aren't mature enough to understand the bigger picture problems in software and latch on to the one thing they do understand. This mindset is generally a great way to get fired.

It's a different story when you don't follow instructions, when your work is consistently wrong, when you aren't a team player, when you consistently don't follow process, when you can't deliver on reasonable deadlines or require an unreasonable amount of supervision. None of those problems are unique to software.
2016-05-25, 2:57 PM #19
Originally posted by Impi:
Ah, that reminds me. In Germany, when you are getting unemployment benefits your applications can be paid for by the government. Including cost of paper, printing, mailing, etc. and also driving to an interview. But only if you do boring standard applications that will only get you hired in boring standard jobs. The designer we hired did of course (like every other applicant) a beautifully designed portfolio with all her nicest works and she got jack **** by the government because it wasn't a standard application. Of course it was more expensive than a standard application but she didn't even get the standard amount to recover some of the costs.

She was hired so it wasn't that big of a deal but I wonder how many people are still unemployed because they let themselves be bullied by the government into writing bad applications.


My honest guess is that employers would find a way to get prospective employees to pay for the costs of employing a person somehow through the application process, e.g. your application must provide proof of a tuberculosis minus test, so they set a standard to prevent abuses and to force employers to cover their own costs. But that's just speculation.
2016-06-04, 1:26 AM #20
Well... I got another one.

Lady calls me because her company is going to hold some 2 hour seminar, wants a two camera coverage with editing. She finds my editing costs too expensive, so she only wants the recording and says she will do the editing. Fine, I bid lower. She accepts, asks for my phone number (when she already had it) and hasn't called back since.

:confused:
Nothing to see here, move along.
2016-06-04, 8:58 AM #21
Adviser didn't bother to tell me he didn't have funding for me for the fall, conveniently the week after most teaching assistantships were assigned, so I'm scrambling to find a class at this university that I'm qualified to help teach and wants more TAs (or a new adviser who hasn't chosen some incoming students for all open positions yet).
I had a blog. It sucked.
2016-06-04, 9:07 AM #22
I was pooping on the other side of the work building (since it's the most convenient toilet for Nikumupoops) when I noticed a hangnail on my right pinky finger. And my nail cutter was in my locker on the other side of the building. Moments of inconvenience were had.

...

:ninja:
Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum
2016-06-04, 12:20 PM #23
Originally posted by Zloc_Vergo:
Adviser didn't bother to tell me he didn't have funding for me for the fall, conveniently the week after most teaching assistantships were assigned, so I'm scrambling to find a class at this university that I'm qualified to help teach and wants more TAs (or a new adviser who hasn't chosen some incoming students for all open positions yet).


This is the worst one so far.
2016-06-04, 12:53 PM #24
I've been reassured by my academic adviser and an older student that the institution isn't going to hang me out to dry, but **** me if it wasn't horrifying.
I had a blog. It sucked.

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