Massassi I am getting laser eyes put in tomorrow and I need your help with two things:

What are all the things that could go wrong I can stay awake about tonight? Earthquake could happen during surgery, since I live in a place where people own more than a few guns it's pretty likely the place will get robbed while I'm under the laser, and it's possible it could be a fly by night scam that will just look like the empty blockbuster it used to be in two weeks.

What sunglasses should I buy? I figure I should protect my investment. I look like a combination of Adrien Brody and Alan Cumming so use that for face shape.

Oh the place also only accepts bitcoin so hopefully the price doesnt drop while they are doing it or they wont finish since I wont be paid in full!

It's actually relatively rare 'round here when I can post something Deus Ex related. (And yes, Deus Ex itself instead of that certain other thing)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfowSe522yI#t=0m27s

(FGR in the house with 18-year-old memes)

Good luck with the ocular re-enhancementing, Spook (not to be confused with the FGR collaborator Silver Spook).

I am scared from reading this thread!

Good luck man.

Make sure you type up and have ready an "I'm blind now goodbye massassi" letter in case the worst happens.

RIP

My dad had that done and after ~20 years he can't see very well again. My wife had it done and after ~15 years she needs glasses again and can't drive at night. I'm not convinced. 15-20 years seems like a long time but consider that it ends up worse than when you started... I'm not talking about just normal degeneration due to aging, but things like halos and spots that weren't there and interfere with night and normal vision and can't be fixed with glasses.

ur gonna be so good looking

I talked to my wife, she said her eyes started going wonky about 5 years after the laser surgery, and she needed glasses again after about 7.

Life's too short to worry about whether earth will still be inhabitable in 5 years, Brian

I mean it can't get any worse you eyesight-***ed *******.

Some years ago a colleague got her eyes lasered and she told me that there are exactly three surgeons in the world that perform this surgery perfectly. One in Cologne, one in Israel and one in the US. Hope you got the right one.

I thought it was mostly done by computers these days? The doctors clamp your eyes, mostly line up the computer/laser, and then press go? Actually thinking back, that's not fully true. I watched a video of a friend of mine getting it done and while the laser/computer made the cuts, the doctor used tools to pry back the clear membrane over the eye and then put it back after the next laser step. It was pretty freaky and required a lot more manual ... uh ... tugging? than I was comfortable with.

The whole idea makes me squeamish. I'm a lot better than I used to be. I used to get nauseous just thinking about it, and almost to the point of vomiting talking about it or watching the video. I couldn't touch my eye or even think about contacts. Nowadays I do wear contacts occasionally (for things like paintball/snowboarding/other sports where glasses are annoying) and putting them in/taking them out doesn't bother me at all, but I'm still not comfortable with the whole laser surgery thing. Maybe in another 10 years.

Oh man, think of the guys who were the first ones to get this surgery done.

Thanks babe. Did you work on that game? I want to write and direct one like that.



What procedure did she get? Over the years of considering this I haven't been able to find any info on regression that wasn't anecdotal (which is still pretty important info in this case) and the negative anecdotes seemed to come from people with significantly worse vision than I had originally who got LASIK or LASEK. My vision has also not changed even a small amount since 2011.

Jon is right though, the collapse is imminent and I want to be able to have fun shooting people over food and water and not worrying about if the person in my sights is actually one of my wives because my glasses fell off! Ten years down the line Earth will be a Venus hellscape which is why I am hitting the sauna as often as possible now to condition myself for that environment. We will all be fighting blind at that point though.



Well I certainly wasn't going to let a (((NAZI))) or an JEW cut on my eyes. I bet I got the right one. He looked like he was 14 years old though.



It was largely done by the computer, but he definitely put instruments on my eyes to control the laser somehow. I got PRK, because I like to dive and jump out of planes and do casual martial arts, so the flap is not a good idea by all accounts. PRK is more traumatic since it basically abrades that membrane and lets it heal rather than a flap but supposedly has less likelihood of the already unlikely event of the flap coming open.




Not to further put your off of this but I could definitely smell my cornea or some other tissue during the main laser steps.

Nah, only supplied a handful of wacky voiceovers.

oh and did you make this happen

And all because of Russian hackers.

FGR I was super freaked out I was going to have some sort of freakout and do that to myself. Luckily they gave me valium.

Jones it's not the Russian hackers it's the chinese hoaxers

How do they prevent your eyes from moving during operation, involuntary or otherwise? Or does it matter?

In the laser arms there were a set of red lights (which I assume they used to orient it) and a green one in the middle they had me focus on. From the simplified answers they were giving me to my valium fueled nerd questions it seems like the laser orients itself to the eye dynamically. I think (from what I can remember listening to them) the reshaping of the cornea took about 20 seconds, so it wasn't too difficult to keep my eyes from moving.

My wife had Lasik done almost a full year ago. She had horrible vision, both near and far, and now her vision is fantastic. She said it was hands down the best decision she's ever made, and while it's obviously only been a short time, she's had no side effects. Her eyes can be a bit dry at times, but not anything unbearable. Also, she does say that when driving at night, she sometimes sees a bit of a "halo effect" from oncoming traffic headlights. Again, nothing to write home about as she can still see just fine at night. Hope your surgery went well!

I'm thinking about going with ortho-k instad. It's special contact lenses that you wear while you sleep. While you're asleep it reshapes your cornea. In the morning you take the contacts out and you can see normally. I'll save Lasik for later in life if this doesn't work out.

What was the second best? Buying an insta-pot? Getting guac on her burrito? Paying for the extra insurance on her phone? Hopefully choosing to marry you was somewhere in the top ten.

I'm going in this Friday, but I'm getting PRK instead. Hopefully the recovery isn't too awful.

Even if it regresses a bit when I'm older, it'll still be worth it not to be dealing with a -8.00 prescription.

thats actually what i got

The biggest thing to worry about here is that enhancing your vision is technically a civil violation of the Foreign Intelligence and Surveillance Act, which only allows enhanced vision for certain members of the intelligence services. They can't imprison you or anything, but if they find out, they can repossess your eyes.

Possibly. What's hilarious is the first two you mentioned are things she's obsessed with.

Spook, so how are your eyes now?

If he doesn't respond soon Brian, I guess that'll be your answer.

He's probably struggling to get a screen reader set up.

My eyes are healed way ahead of schedule according to follow-up exam. I'm going between 20/30 and 20/20 depending on how recently I put in the medicated eye drops I'm on for a few weeks. I just notice a bit of oddness from the eye drops which make it hazy and increased halos around lights at night, which I think may have been worse before because of how dirty I let my glasses get. All in all I am 100% satisfied and am definitely feeling more attractive and confident in for example swing dance situations as well as shop settings or alleys.

Awesome I'm glad it's working out. Good about feeling more attractive in alleys, that's always important.

There is nothing you can do in an alley that won't be better with confidence. Unfortunately, almost all of them are safer with glasses on.