it was a bright day, bob was quietly walking to work, enjoying the beautiful scenery. he was passing through the park when it appeared, a small shadow tracking bob alone. no one noticed it until it happened. with a loud thump, bob dissapeared under the crushing weight of a large ashtray. soon, reports of oversized versions of everyday blunt objects came flooding in from around the country. a gardener virginia was crushed under the brutal weight of a gigantic bug-in-resin paperweight. in florida, a geriatric patient was smashed into a pulp by what appeared to be an excessively large rubber ball. reports came in from sporadic locations along the length of florida of similar events. the ball was found in georgia, resting on the half crushed remains of a man known by the locals simply as "bubba". then a large fax machine smashed a lawyer in D.C., impaling three passers-by as it snaked a powercord and phone cable towards a nearby house. the inhabitants were unharmed, but half the house was destroyed before the phone cord finally got connected. the entire world waited breathlessly for the first sheet of paper to finish printing. when it did, the massive message crushed a traffic cop and the crowd he had been holding back.

alright. that's all I got. this is only barely serious, as you can tell. just think, "b" movie and have some fun.

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ever find yourself in the middle of the desert, wishing you had been able to pack a gallon of water? well, now you can, with, Dehydrated Water! just add water

Carl ran for his life as a giant head of a bobble-head (sp?) rolled down the slanted street. He screamed and ran, but he could not escape the plastic baseball player's head. it crushed him, but he was still alive. He crawled to the side of the street near a conveinience store when something hot land on his pants leg. He looked up and saw a giant ignited candle that had landed on the roof, its front tilting over the roof, dripping hot wax on the street! More wax dripped and sizzled on the pavement. He amnaged to open the door and safely get in the store. He was safe.

...Or was he?

Carl gasped for breath and had his face to the ground. He was alive. It was a miracle! He looked forward and crawled to the register. I managed to get hisself up and nearly fainted when he saw that a giant doll was at the register. "Uh...um..." he stammered. "Hello! Welcome to Frank's Conveinience(sp?) store. Can I help you?" it said in a cute, toy-like voice. "Er...I'll just get a back of Marlboro cigerettes, please...and an ambulence..." He mumbled. "May I see your I.D?" it responded. He slowly handed the doll his Driver's Lisence when he realized he's doind business with a giant, talking doll. "Here you go, and the ambulence is on it's way!" the doll cheerfully said while handing him the cigerettes. "...Thanks..." he responded. He lit the cigerette up and remarked "What the heck is going on?!

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Blue Moon Jedi Mercenaries: Book 0
Current Writers: Mikeyman and Tracer

WWWWWWAAAAAFFFFFFFFFFLLLLEESSSSSS!!!! WAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHA!!

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| Mikeyman wuz here |
| ...Am I never? |
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