The showcase forum is mainly for graphics and designs etc, and well since I started writing poetry (which this is) yet one day I want to transfer that into writing songs I thought this post could be posted in the music forum

Anywho now that i'm done ranting, here's a link to a new poem I wrote. It's def. not amazing and I'm sure could use work. I'm open to any comments which I mean constructive critism by comments, NOT bashing me and ripping my work.

Anywho here's the link to my poem:

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&blogID=9330029&friendID=3589686&Mytoken=20041207132440

Laura

That was cool. I'm going to invite you to my friend's list on there.

Constructive Critism - It's cliche. It's like every poem I see on the back of a teenage girls english notebook. Once I read the first line I kind of went 'not another', but I continued to read to see if this was original, and I'm sorry to say...it isn't. I once wrote a song/poem just like that, everyone said it was heart felt and deep...but it was just making fun of all the poems/songs just like it. You could start to fix it by thinking up some original metaphors and sentences. Another thing that helps is using more then one word to describe one word, it makes the poem seem more unique.

I would say something useful, but i dont really understand peotry myself, not my fortay

Thnx Schming. I added you back

Laura

Poetry.
Forte.

[/spelling nazi]

Some guy on my myspace friends list that I chat with liked the poem. He said he writes lyrics and that it sounded like lyrics and asked if he could put music to it. I gave the green light. I think that's cool, I even mentioned here wanting one day to start writing lyrics and put something I write to music, I cant wait till Donnie sends it back to me with the music behind it

Laura:cool:

I would say something useful, but I don't really understand pottery myself, not my forte.

I do sort of understand ptoeryt, and I have to go with Sajn on this one. It's not bad, but art is graded on a curve.
Stick with it though, I've written pyeotr worse than this one.

*explodes*

?

*eats Catloaf*

STOP EATING MY LOAF!!!

*munch* *munch*