Massassi Forums Logo

This is the static archive of the Massassi Forums. The forums are closed indefinitely. Thanks for all the memories!

You can also download Super Old Archived Message Boards from when Massassi first started.

"View" counts are as of the day the forums were archived, and will no longer increase.

☖ Forums → Showcase → Fight to the Start
Fight to the Start
2008-05-06, 1:04 PM #1
First song in a while I'm really enjoying working on. It should automatically start to play once you click on the link below. There is a two second pause after about 20 seconds, that's going to be vocals and drums when it's finished.

Let me know what you think of it so far. Thanks in advance.

http://ursession.com/Jonny

P.S. Listen with headphones if you got 'em.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-06, 2:38 PM #2
4 stars. It's perfect.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-06, 7:54 PM #3
Needs drums :downswords:

But seriously it's really good.
D E A T H
2008-05-06, 8:07 PM #4
That is actually pretty good.
Bassoon, n. A brazen instrument into which a fool blows out his brains.
2008-05-07, 7:33 PM #5
Pretty damn cool so far, SAJN. Looking forward to hearing a more complete version!

:tfti: :tfti: :tfti: :tfti: :tfti: :tfti:
2008-05-07, 9:28 PM #6
If you guys wouldn't mind. I'd like to know what you think of the second track called RIFF, which is literally A 15 second track showing off a riff I am thinking about using. It sounds like it's from something, but that might just be because it's esentially me climbing up a scale. Let me know if you think it's too cliche to be used or if it's alright.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-07, 9:29 PM #7
They're all without flaws.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-07, 9:33 PM #8
First of all, the sarcasm is not appreciated. Second of all, I'm a lot more accepting to criticism concerning my music than I am with my poetry because I haven't performed any of these before and I know they can use improvement. Whereas with my poetry I am overly protective because I view them all as my children. Hate me for shrugging off your poetry comments, but when it comes to music, I take everyones comments because I don't really consider myself a musician. It's more of a hobby.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-08, 6:40 PM #9
RIFF is cool, but I mean... not very substantial at this point, and I don't mean because of the lack of other stuff, although that COULD (and probably will) add a lot of depth...

Tell me about the riff a bit? Is it just a neat sounding riff.
2008-05-08, 8:19 PM #10
[Edit: See below, saberopus]
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-08, 9:03 PM #11
No... I don't think I'm going to contribute to your double standards with music and poetry. I can't respect someone who asks for criticism and then ignores it, quoting all of his friends' opinions over decent critiques.

And then claims music is like, totally different. This stuff wasn't anywhere near my music tastes, and kind of sucked in my opinion. I decided not to post as much, since everyone else seems to like it, you'd use that as an excuse to ignore my posts.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-08, 10:29 PM #12
Originally posted by SAJN:
First of all, the sarcasm is not appreciated. Second of all, I'm a lot more accepting to criticism concerning my music than I am with my poetry because I haven't performed any of these before and I know they can use improvement. Whereas with my poetry I am overly protective because I view them all as my children. Hate me for shrugging off your poetry comments, but when it comes to music, I take everyones comments because I don't really consider myself a musician. It's more of a hobby.


I really dont even know what to say to this.


So because your focus is on poetry... you dont want people to help you improve? But because you dont care about music youll accept any critique?

I tried, but seriously dude get the **** over yourself. Don't expect me to post in your threads again either.
[01:52] <~Nikumubeki> Because it's MBEGGAR BEGS LIKE A BEGONI.
2008-05-08, 11:09 PM #13
No, it's because my focus on poetry is focused at specific people. So I take the words from those specific people more to heart than from 'internet people'. It's also because you can read a poem written for a slam, but it's a whole different story once you hear it performed. With music, it too has a specific audience, but it's a much larger audience, and it's a lot easier to take advice concerning music because poetry is as personal as it gets for me. It's my personal thoughts and emotions. I don't respond well to people telling me that my personal feelings and emotions are either wrong or trite. Because in my head if it's what I personally think, how can it be improved? You can't improve something that comes from the heart. Sure you can change the word choice around and the flow of it, but once I have something written the way I personally see it perfect, it's really hard for me to change. I don't reject critisism on purpose. I don't aim to displease, it's just hard for me, and I've admitted that. But when it comes to music, it's easy for someone to say "That sounds catchy" or "That sounds bad". It's not as personal to me. I can be accepting of it very easily. And please, let's not turn this thread into an argument over me being a scum bag or something. I really do want my music being critiqued, not my ability to sccept critisism on poetry.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-08, 11:30 PM #14
Your "weakness" argument is moot considering you post your poetry, and then deny criticism. It'd be different if we discovered your poetry on your personal website and called you out on it, but you actually ask us for our opinion, and then degrade it because we're internet people, and our opinions don't matter.

There is an objective observation pertaining to effective language. The minute you accept that your writing is **** (this is something all writers must learn to admit), and that there is an infinite potential for improvement, you can succeed as a writer, and learn the intricacies of language.

"How can you judge poetry, man" is the exact reason I hate teaching poetry to high-school seniors. You get the same in college level creative writing class, but then you can tell them that they're horrible poets and that they should drop out without looking back. 9th graders, amazingly, grasp the concept of objective language with subjective interpretation better than some scholars.

Why I'm still posting: This applies to music, visual art, design, and cave drawings. It's why people criticize your beloved SOAD. It's why people criticize you as a person. You're constantly full up on your own sense of art, and the Ad Populum fallacy that justifies that arrogance.

I don't think you're allowed to pick and choose which kinds of criticism you get in which threads you post when you boast artistic liberties like that. You should expect these kinds of arguments. Instead of being apologetic, maybe you can embrace them, and become a more open person.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-08, 11:34 PM #15
You don't understand as well, that the reason I have such a hard time with you telling me how much I suck, is because you're sitting over there calling me arrogant, stewing in arrogance.

Not just on my threads but on other threads, you're always showing yourself off one way or another, fighting for a spot at the top. When I post, it's garbage, but useless vlogs of you shaving your *** or buying cigars and energy drinks are oscar winning films.

You need to take a step down just as much as I do.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-08, 11:40 PM #16
The difference is that I can take an entire internet forum making a 20 page thread about me in stride, and laugh about it. You ball your angry fists, stomping your feet crying "Art!"

My faults don't negate your own. I think you're an arrogant child who wants to be taken seriously, but isn't willing to wear a tie. If you want to call yourself a poet, earn it. That doesn't mean impress people who already like your stuff, but impress people who don't. You'll learn far more that way then you ever will pandering to a convenient audience.

But you're right. My vlogs that I've never posted in the showcase forums are why you're bad at accepting criticism. My criticism of your poor movie tastes is why no one on massassi likes your writing. My soap box is why your's wobbles.

The two are unrelated, and you're being evasive.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-08, 11:56 PM #17
I'll tell you what, SAJN:

MB and I will remove all of our posts in this thread if you're willing to take part in a scientific experiment.

You and I will write a poem over the weekend. We'll post them here, provide eachother with criticism, revise, and then submit them to an agreed-upon poetry forum. We'll ask for criticisms and ask them to determine the better poem. Not to prove who's a better poet: I don't think there's such a thing. It's to prove the concept of language effectiveness, and that objective people will likely agree with the criticisms people on this site have had, even people who you think are biased.

We'll have a similar topic, so the point is more clear.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-09, 11:07 AM #18
--------- CUT STUPID BABBLING HERE --------

Anyways, I think it was really well done, however around 0:50, I was expecting a change in the instrument or pattern, and it didn't come. Needs drums, but you already know that :P
A computer's worst nightmare:
0010111010011110210011010001

HazTeam Website-=HT=
2008-05-09, 12:01 PM #19
Guys...the best critic is always yourself. It's good to have constructive criticism from people you respect (and know what they're talking about) but at some point you have to say screw it and try to make art with the skills you have. Honestly, the best way to improve is to record the gig, listen to it the next day and then work on the things you didn't like.

Quote:
So because your focus is on poetry... you dont want people to help you improve? But because you dont care about music youll accept any critique?


His point is obviously that he considers himself a better poet than musician, and that his music is more in need of help than his word writing.
COUCHMAN IS BACK BABY
2008-05-09, 12:03 PM #20
RIFF has been updated from about 16 seconds to 59 seconds. I added in the second riff as well as a bridge or something. I'm currently working on it, but now you can put a sound to the tabs that I posted.

Also, gammasts, I was going to use the first half of that to just let play, and then start to sing at the second half. I was thinking it would sound less repetitive with the drums changing at the half way mark as well as vocals kicking in. But what do you think? I was considering cutting it short and changing it up sooner like you said, but I'm not sure if I should do that now, or wait until I get drums/vocals in it to see if I like it or not.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-09, 12:52 PM #21
Not arrogant at all.
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2008-05-09, 3:19 PM #22
Here are the tabs to "FIGHT TO THE START" and "RIFF"

Code: 
Tabs for FIGHT TO THE START

OPENING                                            
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|-----------------5h7-7/9-9-10p9h10p9h10p9-
D|-----------5/7-7--------------------------
A|-----5-7-5--------------------------------
D|-5h7--------------------------------------

RIFF 1
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|----------------------------------9/16\9--
A|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-14--7/14\7--
D|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-14----------

RIFF 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-----------------------------10/15\10-----
A|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--8/13\8------
D|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------

RIFF 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|----------------------------------7/13\7--
A|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-12--5/11\5--
D|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-12----------

RIFF 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|------------------------------9/16\9------
A|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--7/14\7------
D|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------

MAIN RIFF
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-14----------
A|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-14----------
D|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-14----------

MAIN RIFF (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------
A|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------
D|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------

MAIN RIFF
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-12----------
A|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-12----------
D|-7-7-7-7-10-10-10-10-14-14-15-12----------

MAIN RIFF (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------
A|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14--------------
D|-6-6-6-6-9-9-9-9-14-14-15-14-------------- x 2


Code: 
Tabs for RIFF

RIFF 1                                              
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-----7----6-------------------------------
A|---------------7----7----7/9--------------
D|-4-4--4-4--4-4--4-4--4-4------------------

RIFF 1 (Cont.)                                              
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|---------------7----6----4---------------- 
A|-----9----7-------------------------------
D|-0-0--0-0--0-0--0-0--0-0------------------ x4

BRIDGE 1
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-4-4---------------4-4--------------------
A|-4-4---------------4-4--------------------
D|-4-4-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-4-4-0-0-0-0-0-0-0------

BRIDGE 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-4-4---------------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--------
A|-4-4---------------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--------
D|-4-4-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--------

BRIDGE 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-4-4---------------4-4--------------------
A|-4-4---------------4-4--------------------
D|-4-4-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-4-4-0-0-0-0-0-0-0------

BRIDGE 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-4-4---------------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--------
A|-4-4---------------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--------
D|-4-4-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--------

BRIDGE 1 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|------------------------------------------
D|-2-2-2-2-2-2-12\4-------------------------
A|-2-2-2-2-2-2-12\4-------------------------
D|-2-2-2-2-2-2-12\4-------------------------

RIFF 2
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|-----7----6------------------------------- 
D|---------------7----6---------------------    
A|--------------------------7---------------  
D|-4-4--4-4--4-4--4-4--4-4------------------ 

RIFF 2 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|-----7----6------------------------------- 
D|---------------7----7---------------------    
A|--------------------------7/9-------------
D|-5-5--5-5--5-5--5-5--5-5------------------ 

RIFF 2 (Cont.)
E|------------------------------------------
B|------------------------------------------
G|---------------------------7-------------- 
D|-----0----0----0----0---------------------
A|-----0----0----0----0---------------------        
D|-0-0--0-0--0-0--0-0--0-0------------------ 

RIFF 2 (Cont.)
E|-----9----9----9----9----9----------------
B|-----9----9----9----9----9----------------
G|-----9----9----9----9----9----------------
D|-7-7--7-7--7-7--7-7--7-7-7----------------
A|-7-7--7-7--7-7--7-7--7-7-7---------------- 
D|-7-7--7-7--7-7--7-7--7-7-7---------------- x 2
Think while it's still legal.
2008-05-09, 4:22 PM #23
Wow guys, I participated just as vehemently as the rest of you in the poetry threads, but this is a guitar piece.

Who gives a ****?
D E A T H

↑ Up to the top!