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ForumsShowcase → Salvia Divinorum
Salvia Divinorum
2008-09-22, 7:46 AM #1
In the beginning there was a large tree. This tree was creating itself amongst the other tree tops, intertwining with their branches and shooting off into the sky. Much like the previous tree, this tree was created from fractured patterns and fleeting images. Although this tree, unlike the previous tree, was quite realistic and sprawling in it's image.

As the tree continued to grow I decided to survey the rest of the area, and as I continued to glance around, I saw a flash of pink with a defined black outline, that much like the tree, built itself into the forestry around it. This eventually revealed itself to be a massive octopus, floating in the clouds above the trees. This creature was not a painting or a cartoon, in fact it was quite realistic, except for it's lack of details.

Suddenly I felt the pressure of this entire experience sitting upon my jaw. Not a negative pressure, but a pressure that was attempting to draw the laughter out of my body. It didn't feel as if it was being sucked out of my body or my soul, but simply being released. As if I had a stockpile of laughter that I didn't know about, and it was simply trying to show me how to express it. I recognized this feeling from before, closed my eyes, and pushed it back into my self.

I thought all of my words out before I expressed them to avoid giving into laughter and gibberish. And even though I was now able to convey my words more clearly than before, I still had occasional breaks in my english as well as the constant repetition of single words or phrases. It felt almost autistic in nature, but benign as well.

While my eyes were closed I noticed a source of light trying to reach my eyes through my eyelids, as if someone was holding a flashlight to my face. In an attempt to block the light I held up my hands, only to realize that the light was in fact emanating from the tips of my index fingers. I opened my eyes for a brief second, just to be sure my fingers were still fingers, and they were. Closing my eyes again, my fingers became light once more. I started to move my fingers in front of my face, and as I moved them I created colors from the darkness. Simple patterns and shapes continued to appear as I wildly flew my fingers about, until eventually the colors and patterns started to take form.

I saw brown, and as I tugged upon it, cobblestone roads and dirt paths appeared. I saw white, and as I drew upon it, columns and buildings, very Greek in nature, arose in place of the nothingness. And finally I saw a bright cerulean blue, from which waterfalls were being created. Every stroke I made arched itself out into gentle flowing waterfalls, not harsh like a faucet or a hose, but gentle as if they were flowing from massive streams or canals.

I had been building a city, and the more I created, the more I wanted to create. But something in me made me stop for a second. An outside voice had interrupted my flow, and with the sudden stop in my creating, I opened my eyes once again for a reassurance of my reality, and in that second I spotted the octopus once more, but just as soon as it appeared, it disappeared into the sky as if it had never existed.

When I returned my city was still standing in it's entirety, except now intertwined within it's paths and buildings the octopus lay. No worries I though, I would simply build around and on top of it. But as the first swipe of my finger occurred, my powers had changed, and instead of creating, I was erasing. No matter how quickly I erased, the land was quick to rebuild itself, but like a scab on a wound it wasn't perfect like it once was. The parts of the city that were erased did not fill themselves in with what was once there, but with stones and dirt, and only with stones and dirt, until my entire city consisted of nothing but brown.

Saddened by this, I opened my eyes, and discovered that my city had been restored to it's original form, and existed behind a small cluster of trees a few hundred yards away. But before I could react to this, a large snake, containing the same patterns and colors of the cobble-stoned road, started to climb into the trees surrounding my city, until it became part of the tree itself, hardening into bark and leaves as it became more and more intricately bound to the tree.

Suddenly the snake vanished, and with it my city as well. Desperately looking for answers, I looked to the sky and saw a face, mocking me, taunting me, and without speaking, letting me know that I couldn't enter the very city that I had just created. I yelled at him, cursing him out viciously and sincerely. And although he was scoffing at me, and I yelling at him, I didn't feel angry. No matter how I presented myself, I would always come back to a comfortable reassuring feeling, until the face slowly hid itself into the trees and eventually disappeared.

Once more I closed my eyes and saw only darkness. The kind of darkness that we all see when we close our eyes. And then I opened them, and just like the rest of the world, I saw trees and grass, and a nighttime sky. No more cities, no more snakes, just the world for what it was. And with that I walked back home, keeping in mind what I had just created and lost all in one night.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-09-22, 5:39 PM #2
tldr

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)
Bassoon, n. A brazen instrument into which a fool blows out his brains.
2008-09-22, 5:45 PM #3
sajn_master
gbk is 50 probably

MB IS FAT
2008-09-22, 6:23 PM #4
this would be another fine addition to the erowid experience vaults for sure.
2008-09-22, 7:09 PM #5
Quote:
Genocides are going to occur as long as we put profits before people. - Serj Tankian 2008


:cool:

it could just b the lamp shinin on my comp screen but tha text look brightr on the rite side whitch looks rly sweet dood...........gj man
Quote Originally Posted by Chaz Ghostle
some gay men prefer to have partners with smaller, softer bodies[. . .]It really all comes down to what you like.
2008-09-22, 7:17 PM #6
Parts of it are bold, lol.
2008-09-22, 7:34 PM #7
suz i meant th poem (??? short sotry?? didnt read it actualy soz man...........) not the serj text :cool::cool::cool:
Quote Originally Posted by Chaz Ghostle
some gay men prefer to have partners with smaller, softer bodies[. . .]It really all comes down to what you like.
2008-09-22, 9:52 PM #8
i'm guessing you want some feedback:

I think there are some sentences where your use of a word more than once just doesn't seem to flow right e.g. "But something in me made me stop for a second." In this case the repeated use of 'me' doesn't quite flow I don't think. Perhaps something like "But something from within made me stop for a second."

Also there are some sentences back-to-back that seem contradictory. e.g. "But something in me made me stop for a second. An outside voice had interrupted my flow, ..." In this case the 'something inside me' being 'an outside voice'. Now I know this story is a bit nonsensical or dream-like in and of itself, but even dreams have some sort of sensical flow. So perhaps consider changing one of the sentences e.g. "But something from within made me stop for a second. A murmuring voice had interrupted my flow, ..."
"What is and what should never be"
Sector 3027 - AA
Space Station Saber Training
2008-09-23, 12:53 AM #9
I saw 1 comma lacking, one in the 2nd paragraph "that, much like the tree". Also, perhaps adding some commas to give more emphasis in these spots "As the tree continued to grow,[\b] I decided..." and "While my eyes were closed, I noticed..."
:ninja:

Well besides my insane proofreading (well the lacking one had me rereading that sentence a few times), and the fact you prob hate me now, I really enjoyed reading this. I loved the imagry of being put into God's shoes to create the world how you'd want, only to have Him taunt you by having you destroy everything you've just created. I take it's symbolic of how we want perfection and beauty, yet as we try to shape it, we only end up staining our creations, ultimately ruining them? Or could it be symbolizing that we should not force ourselves to attempt to live other's lives, to stop our envy for we will only tear apart the beauty around us trying to obtain that? Perhaps I'm just reading my own life expirences into it. *shrugs*
Major projects working on:
SATNRT, JK Pistol Mod, Aliens TC, Firearms

Completed
Judgement Day (HLP), My level pack
2008-09-23, 7:24 AM #10
You could be right in your take on the story. To be honest, even I don't know what it means. I was sort of nix on any sort of back story for this, but I'm still trying to figure out what it all means to me. The story isn't a story I sat and created, but it's a literal re-telling of what I saw when I tried salvia a few nights ago. That's also why the grammar may be FUBAR in more than a few places >.>
Think while it's still legal.
2008-09-23, 8:05 AM #11
describing drug induced hallucinations is not worthy of a showcase post
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2008-09-23, 8:18 AM #12
Says you. I say it is, BAM. Posted.
Think while it's still legal.
2008-09-23, 8:23 PM #13
doesn't keep it from sucking
eat right, exercise, die anyway

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