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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → Dead frog thread...
123
Dead frog thread...
2005-02-26, 9:58 AM #1
This is like lightbulb jokes but better. The idea stems from my Physics teacher as he told the class, "Biology students like to kill a frog by using a large amount of ether, while physics students want to throw the frog off the roof." So this will be how the thread will go...

Like lightbulb jokes, the "how to kill a frog" comments will jump from different groups of people throughout the thread. So, the above poster will give a person or persons (such as feminists), the below poster will state how that person or person will do the killing of a frog in a wittty fashion (such as feminists will kill a frog by so and so...) and then continue the thread by giving a person or person for the next poster. Be creative and use logic. :)

So I'll start...

How will an NYPD officer kill a frog?
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
-----------------------------@%
2005-02-26, 10:01 AM #2
By shooting first and asking why it croked later

How will Bill Gates kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 10:11 AM #3
He won't kill it, he'll buy the rights to it, label it his, and sell it as a version of Windows.

How will PETA kill a frog?
D E A T H
2005-02-26, 10:15 AM #4
They'll mince it up and put in KFC kids meals....

How would the Pope kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 10:17 AM #5
[never mind. no delete button.]
If it breaks, you get to keep both pieces.
2005-02-26, 10:18 AM #6
He'll get the frog to give him a blood transfusion, bleed it dry and then some.

How would Michael Jackson kill a frog?
Xbox Live/PlayStation Network/Steam: tone217
http://twitter.com/ourmatetone
2005-02-26, 10:21 AM #7
....touch it in all the wrong places and make it share his bed.

How would OJ Simpson kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 10:22 AM #8
He wouldn't (or would he?). Either way, he'd get a bloody good lawyer afterwards.

How would Gordon Freeman kill a frog?
Xbox Live/PlayStation Network/Steam: tone217
http://twitter.com/ourmatetone
2005-02-26, 10:34 AM #9
With a crowbar



how would Brian kill a frog?
Holy soap opera Batman. - FGR
DARWIN WILL PREVENT THE DOWNFALL OF OUR RACE. - Rob
Free Jin!
2005-02-26, 10:42 AM #10
He'd suck out it's soul then neglect it's fanbased website for 3 years.

How would a wild pack of purpal mongeese kill a frog?
ᵗʰᵉᵇˢᵍ๒ᵍᵐᵃᶥᶫ∙ᶜᵒᵐ
ᴸᶥᵛᵉ ᴼᵑ ᴬᵈᵃᵐ
2005-02-26, 11:00 AM #11
They would politely ask it to die, and it would most certainly comply.

How would an ancient Greek philosopher kill a frog?
I'm just a little boy.
2005-02-26, 11:06 AM #12
It's not a question of whether the frog is dead, but of how the frog relates to the cosmos.

How would an astronaut kill a frog?
Stuff
2005-02-26, 11:08 AM #13
They would set it free.


How would a programmer kill a frog?
I'm just a little boy.
2005-02-26, 11:19 AM #14
He'd compile 'frog.exe' without including amphibia.h

How would a jazz drummer kill a frog?
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■■■■■■■■ enshu
2005-02-26, 11:57 AM #15
a jazz drummer would hit the frog with a drumstick in complex patterns in different areas without a break for about 4 hours.

How would Jeff Goldblum kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 12:02 PM #16
He would mix his DNA with the frog's and then die tragically.

How would Elvis Presley kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 12:25 PM #17
It wouldn't matter; after the frog died, every tabloid in America would be screaming "Frog lives again!" "Frog spotted in New York City!"


How would Darth Vader kill a frog?
"It is not advisable, James, to venture unsolicited opinions. You should spare yourself the embarrassing discovery of their exact value to your listener."
"Rationality is the recognition of the fact that nothing can alter the truth and nothing can take precedence over that act of perceiving it."
2005-02-26, 12:27 PM #18
He'd chew the poor bloody frog's ear off, going on about how it was destiny that they'd meet again, how he was the master now, how the circle was complete, how he is the frog's father, how the dark side is stronger. The frog would eventually die of boredom.

[edit: Just thought I'd point out the "chewing off of the ear" is a figure of speech meaning "to just not shut up".]

How would Richard Simmons kill a frog?
Xbox Live/PlayStation Network/Steam: tone217
http://twitter.com/ourmatetone
2005-02-26, 12:28 PM #19
with a little help from mister stabby
make it work out, eventually the frog becomes famous, and dies of a drug overdose

how would Master Chief kill a frog?
Holy soap opera Batman. - FGR
DARWIN WILL PREVENT THE DOWNFALL OF OUR RACE. - Rob
Free Jin!
2005-02-26, 12:30 PM #20
He'd grab his gun, say "I think we're just getting started.", aim his gun and then.... TO BE CONTINUED!

How would Christopher Walken kill a frog?
Xbox Live/PlayStation Network/Steam: tone217
http://twitter.com/ourmatetone
2005-02-26, 12:32 PM #21
with stylish leather gloves on his hands.

How would a metal band kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 12:37 PM #22
The lead singer would bite off its head on stage as a publicity stunt.

How would Colonel Walter E. Kurtz kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 2:35 PM #23
He'd watch the frog crawl along the edge of a straight razor, because that's his dream. That's his nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor, and surviving.

How would a pacifist hedgehog kill a frog?
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■■■■■■■■ enshu
2005-02-26, 2:37 PM #24
Quote:
Originally posted by Tenshu
He'd watch the frog crawl along the edge of a straight razor, because that's his dream. That's his nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor, and surviving.

How would a pacifist hedgehog kill a frog?


Total accident. Hedgehog fell down a cliff backfirst onto the frog.


How would an Everquest addict kill a frog?
"Jayne, this is something the Captain has to do for himself"

"N-No it's not!"

"Oh."
2005-02-26, 2:41 PM #25
He wouldn't kill it at first, but then when it disturbs his gaming, he'll annihilate it utterly by beating it to death with a mouse shouting "WHY DID THEY NERF THE MONK!!!?? WHY!!?!"

How would a philosopher kill a frog?
Yeah, you stay here and take life seriously. I'll go and have some fun.
2005-02-26, 3:03 PM #26
By smothering it with the "truth."

How would Hillary Clinton kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 3:11 PM #27
After her husband gets impeached, she beats it to death, blaiming it for his "incident"

How would a world of warcraft addict kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 4:18 PM #28
He'd forget to feed it.

How would Kreia (from KotOR 2) kill a frog?
Xbox Live/PlayStation Network/Steam: tone217
http://twitter.com/ourmatetone
2005-02-26, 7:58 PM #29
Her actions causes the game to go in a crash, thus killing the frog.

How would Jaiph kill a frog?
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
-----------------------------@%
2005-02-26, 8:11 PM #30
He would leave it stranded on an island resort with murderous Jedi knights.

How would a Frenchman kill a frog?
I'm just a little boy.
2005-02-26, 8:16 PM #31
He would commit suicide.

How would George Bush kill a frog?
My JK Level Design | 2005 JK Hub Level Pack (Plexus) | Massassi Levels
2005-02-26, 8:25 PM #32
He has a button on the arm of his chair that, when pressed, will nuke all the frogs in the world.

How would Strong Bad kill a frog?
Stuff
2005-02-26, 8:28 PM #33
He would make fun of its bad spelling.


How would gandhi kill a frog?
2005-02-26, 8:28 PM #34
Firecrackers.

How would a hobbit kill a frog?

[Edit: Bah, this was supposed to be for George Bush. Damn you, kyle.]
I'm just a little boy.
2005-02-26, 8:34 PM #35
Quote:
Originally posted by Echoman
This is like lightbulb jokes but better. The idea stems from my Physics teacher as he told the class, "Biology students like to kill a frog by using a large amount of ether, while physics students want to throw the frog off the roof." So this will be how the thread will go...

Like lightbulb jokes, the "how to kill a frog" comments will jump from different groups of people throughout the thread. So, the above poster will give a person or persons (such as feminists), the below poster will state how that person or person will do the killing of a frog in a wittty fashion (such as feminists will kill a frog by so and so...) and then continue the thread by giving a person or person for the next poster. Be creative and use logic. :)

So I'll start...

How will an NYPD officer kill a frog?

Shoot it.
2005-02-26, 8:35 PM #36
Quote:
Originally posted by Stinkywrix
How would gandhi kill a frog?

He would incite a riot.
My JK Level Design | 2005 JK Hub Level Pack (Plexus) | Massassi Levels
2005-02-26, 8:37 PM #37
Quote:
Originally posted by Flirbnic
How would a hobbit kill a frog?

He would throw it into Mount Doom.

How would Ahnuld kill a frog?
My JK Level Design | 2005 JK Hub Level Pack (Plexus) | Massassi Levels
2005-02-26, 8:44 PM #38
Quote:
Originally posted by Daft_Vader
How would Ahnuld kill a frog?


He'd go back in time to save John Connor from the frog.

How would reality TV kill a frog?
The music industry is a cruel and shallow money trench where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side.
2005-02-26, 8:46 PM #39
They would tell the frog that it just won a large sum of money then when the frog found out it was all a lie he'd commit suicide.

How would Max Payne kill a frog?
Think while it's still legal.
2005-02-26, 8:51 PM #40
With bullet-time and a sawed off shotgun in the bathroom. Duh.


How would Japanese scientists kill a frog?
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