I think that in both cases, the guys were nervous, just like a lot of guys can be. It always seems to be that the guy has to make the first move.

were you naked?

tehehe the forcefield thing was funny. Milady was convinced that he kept coming because he wanted something from the area but kept getting disappointed that we were still there or some such. I had to assure the silly girl (kidding...maybe) that there was actually a forcefield surrounding us. Drunks are funny.

You were in a nerd fest party. All those situations scream lack of confidence on both sides. If you like a guy so much, remove yourself from your "chatting" and go ****ing talk to him. However, you will be disssssssappointed later on... people with low self-esteem typically self-destruct in relationships.

lol are you kidding me? We were at a party with an a capella group whose members had egos the size of California!!

Yeah seriously - not really nerds (though they all really liked Mortal Combat). They all seemed not to have any confidence issues (at least it looked that way to us). Plus we've been told by our guy friends and I think I saw it in here a couple times that "boys don't like to be approached first" - that they want to make the first move or something like that. An assertation I am perfectly ok with. I like it when guys make the first move.

whatever. their loss...


asl plz?

Then the only answer we have left to give you is that you're really ugly, and guys were repulsed by your mere presence.

His friends wanted him to play a joke on you (the 4x guy) and his pants wouldn't let him, or he was trying to talk to you, and his pants wouldn't let him. Perhaps his pants wouldn't let him?

And the other guy is a pansy and wants the girl tomake the first move. He sounds a little like me.

[QUOTE=Blood Asp]Then the only answer we have left to give you is that you're really ugly, and guys were repulsed by your mere presence. :)[/QUOTE]


lol that explains so much about my life.

[QUOTE=Blood Asp]Then the only answer we have left to give you is that you're really ugly, and guys were repulsed by your mere presence. :)[/QUOTE]
ouch.

so much wanted to say that, but thought i'd play the wating game.. :em321:

self-confidence != ego

You wouldn't know from meeting me casually that I lack confidence, but I can never just go up to a girl.

Whether a guy will go up to a girl is perhaps the only sure way of juding their confidence. It sounds like these guys were interested but were just lacking in confidence. The number of girls that is most intimidating is 3, more and less are easier to deal with. But with 3, you know it's not just the one you're talking to that is deciding how good you are.

Also, even though guys may prefer to make the first move (though it would probably be a nice boost to confidence ot have it the other way round occasionally), they might at least like some indication that they aren't going to be shot down or laughed at straight away.

detty wins

I'd say that's a very accurate list... I'm guilty of doing nearly all of those things.

Lies, I'm much more sexy.

Sounds like some pretty weird guys to me. There could be a lot of reasons why they did that, but I have to agree with most here that the shy factor sounds reasonable. And I'm still an advocate of the equal opportunity deal -- girls should approach guys just as much as guys should approach girls. Then again, I understand why girls would rather have the guys approach them -- that whole "confidence is the sexiest part of a guy" deal. Which sucks for me, because I like my women independant and whatnot, and thusfar I've been making the mistake of not being assertive/confident enough to make it worthwhile for those sort of women.

Asked by me in a later post before your "comment"


"like what are some things u all do like indiviually

like when u like a chick or what have u. what are things u do, or rather, how do u act around her and all that?"

u would have seen that had u read the thread

[QUOTE=Blood Asp]Blah blah blah[/QUOTE]

You don't know much about the real world do you?

"They were nerds and lacked confidence"

Not all nerds lack confidence and either you are generalizing or baseing off nerdy self. You really need to get away from your computer kid. You're missing out on all the mysteries of life.

1.) Why is "comment" in quotations? Is there something better to define my post? Perhaps "horrid truth" is more fitting?

2.) I'm sorry...next time someone posts about the latest scoop and gossip girls are mass forwarding to each other via e-mail ripped directly from Redbook, I'll be sure to sit down and take notes, you know, so that I'm far more helpful. Oh wait, here's a bit of advice, when you start a thread include the topic you want to be discussed in your initial post, especially when all you really include in the initial post was copy-n-pasted directly from your friends mass-forwarded e-mail.

3.) It's "you."

^^ he's got a point though.

Roach rules.

Don't be mad, Roach. We're all friends here.

My friend has a HUGE ego and no self confidence. In fact, he decided recently to stay with his girlfriend after he found out she cheated on him several times. I'm convinced it's because he's scared that he won't be able to find another girlfriend anytime soon.

Well, confidence issues are one, but his personality is just annoying as hell so if I were a girl I'd probably be turned off by it too unless I was a total fake-*** like he/his girlfriend is/are.

I used to have confidence issues, but you learn rather quickly that if you take the initiative, you get what you want faster than you thought possible. Not saying I'm anything like Page...

oh...the pain...u..i mean YOU got me

its in quotations cuz u were being a smartass

Yeah. You have to put yourself out there or you won't get anything.

How did you look at them? Directly in the eye, in a focused /direct manner? I can see how many guys can assume, if girls are giving them a direct, intense stare while observing him walking towards you, that you are thinking "Umm...ok, what is he doing? Can I help you?" Especially if there are more than one of you.
They feel like they are being put in the spotlight as they walk towards you, as if they were going before the supreme court. While its bad to interpret things like this, girls have been known to be *****es in situations such as these.

...

The biggest piece of advice I would give you Milady, Sugarless, BoricuaDelight, and the rest of you, is that many people, some women included, but mostly men, interpret most of their social sitations (especially with the opposite sex), in terms of past experiences and mental labeling. For example, they might meet a girl who is wealthy at a party. Having met a few wealthy girls in the past who were very concieded, this girl is also subconsciously assumed to be a spoiled *****. Or perhaps a few girls in the past had acted interested in him and came up and started talking to him, turned out to be complete teases, so he assumes when girls come up and instigate conversations with him, they are at best looking for a O.N.S. and shouldnt be bothered with. It also can go to the extreme of "all girls are just *****es." Some people do this labeling only slightly subconsciously, some to the complete extreme.

So I would say the reason these guys might act shy, hostile, or just weird is not because of anything that YOU directly did or didnt do, or that there is anything WRONG with you, but rather his past experiences that he associates you with. On the other hand, he may put you on this giant pedastal in his mind, of which he thinks you are far superior to him. Maybe b/c of your good looks, or maybe something else he doesn't have. As a result, he will either be shy and scared (which you might misenterpret as 'not interested'), or he might feel threatened and thus attack or be mean to you so he doesnt feel so small anymore. Most guys overanalyze situations with girls, especially if they are interested, to such an extent that they cannot relate anymore, because they have reduced the other person to a bundle of thoughts, labels and judgements. This is why people of the opposite sex seem so mysterious and hard to understand sometimes.

Just from my experiences anyways....


So I would say just be yourself and dont always get wrapped up in the drama of GUYS and trying to figure out what they do and why they do it, and try not to take it personally, because its usually not meant to be. Most of the time its so complicated that noone can understand it but them, and also because then you are playing their game of complete over-analyzation and many guys are not even worth the energy

[QUOTE=Unknown User]
So I would say just be yourself and dont always get wrapped up in the drama of GUYS and trying to figure out what they do and why they do it, and try not to take it personally, because its usually not meant to be. Most of the time its so complicated that noone can understand it but them, and also because then you are playing their game of complete over-analyzation and many guys are not even worth the energy[/QUOTE]

dun dun dun dun.

[quote=Unknown User]Or perhaps a few girls in the past had acted interested in him and came up and started talking to him, turned out to be complete teases, so he assumes when girls come up and instigate conversations with him, they are at best looking for a O.N.S. and shouldnt be bothered with.[/quote]

Unless you're in some sort of a relationship, your assumption that girls looking for one night stands (or one night stands in general) shouldn't be bothered with is, at the least, flawed.

Sweet Jesus. PLEASE TYPE THE WORD "YOU" RATHER THAN USING THE DAMNED LETTER!

I have to read all of this crap for moderation. It's dribble, at least make it intelligible dribble.

The big difference between guys and girls in this case?

Girls care about all that stuff.

usux go die plox kthx.

My analyzation consists of two questions. "Do I want in her pants? How can I get in her pants?"

Overanalyze. Haha. Thread over.

He's terrified of the protective pack! That invisible force field is something we men can balk at when you see a girl you fancy in the protective care of her female friends. It's one thing to muster the cajones to talk to a certain special lass, but to talk to her IN FRONT OF a bunch of people who will tease her/you afterwards about it is an entirely different story.

Men not touching women as they please? I feel like living in a nightmare

Indeed.

Also, I have been noticing body language since last year, and what certain things mean.

I have came to the conclusion that body language differs from person to person. And some people don't know how to speak with their body.

I also agree with Yecti in which people should type "You" unless intentially talKING leik dis lolol

yes. funny.

laugh damn you, laugh!

o.O