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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → Why're atheists also so GRUMPY?
12
Why're atheists also so GRUMPY?
2009-01-13, 12:27 PM #1
I have actually found my favourite thing on the internet ever. Seriously, I've never had this much enjoyment from anything else on the internet. ever. Check out
http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/

It's awesome. Mr. Gruff the atheist goat has some of the best catchphrases ever, click on his face for some of his classics like:

"Jesus probably wouldn't love me anyway..."
"Coffee's the only thing that gives me solace!"
"I feel empty... I'm gonna drink more coffee"
"Nothing's gonna happen when I die.. I think.."

I actually have a dressing gown and coffee mug exactly like that, it's a little uncanny.

Seriously, this site is absolute comedy gold. Other classics include:
""Neanderthals were humans with abnormal bone growth due to very advanced age and flood-cloud-related rickets."

I really don't know if this site is real or a satire. It's ****ing insane, but it links to real sites, it has real banners, and I can find no indication that it's actually a satire of anything. Either way, it's hilarious.
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2009-01-13, 12:30 PM #2
God I hate atheists.
Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum
2009-01-13, 12:35 PM #3
Wow, they are teaching kids that the earth is 10,000 years old
"Nulla tenaci invia est via"
2009-01-13, 12:38 PM #4
It's sarcastic. Look at the Professor Giraffenstein thing:

Question: Haven't dinos been extinct for millions of years?
Answer: Wrong little buddy. Dinosaurs still walk on the land and swim in the seas! And the earth is less than 10,000 years old!

Word for word. That can't be serious.
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2009-01-13, 12:49 PM #5
I dunno, it links extensively to:
http://www.prayforfrance.org/
which is almost just as bat**** ****ing insane, but seems a whole lot more real (and there is an 'Objectif france' which seems to be part of the same thing).
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2009-01-13, 1:00 PM #6
Originally posted by FastGamerr:
God: I hate atheists.


fixdlolamirite
2009-01-13, 1:04 PM #7
http://objectiveministries.org/creation/kangaroo.html

Yeah, that's definite sarcasm.
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 1:12 PM #8
Originally posted by saberopus:
fixdlolamirite



You are SO right you sexy thing.
2009-01-13, 1:25 PM #9
Originally posted by Deadman:
http://objectiveministries.org/creation/kangaroo.html

Yeah, that's definite sarcasm.


But then if you go to http://objectiveministries.org/gametheory/ this is actually a pretty standard Christian argument. Pascal's Wager is resolved quite easily, of course, but this exact argument is precisely the same as I've heard from an awful lot of real Christians.

...unless all Christians are actually a parody. Damn, I'm really not going to be able to take anyone's religious sensitivities seriously now, my immediate reaction will be "Damn, that's hilarious satire, you genuinely sound like you actually believe that! You're amazing!" and walk off.
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2009-01-13, 1:28 PM #10
It's not just the argument, it's the way it is written: kangaroo is aboriginese for I don't know?
Not to mention I found that link after clicking on a picture of Hopsiah the Kanga-Jew.

And then theres this lovely image drawn by a child of just twenty two and a half years old

[http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/art/kidzart-crissy_party.jpg]



And the directions on how to draw the lamb? brilliants!!
http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/drawlambuel.html
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 1:41 PM #11
Originally posted by saberopus:
You are SO right you sexy thing.


Take me now.

http://objectiveministries.org/babyj/
2009-01-13, 2:35 PM #12
I remember this place from a while back, it has to be a parody.

Also, what does this remind you of:
Attachment: 20929/kidzart-jesusshineshislove.png (8,893 bytes)
2009-01-13, 2:43 PM #13
Originally posted by Mort-Hog:
But then if you go to http://objectiveministries.org/gametheory/ this is actually a pretty standard Christian argument. Pascal's Wager is resolved quite easily, of course, but this exact argument is precisely the same as I've heard from an awful lot of real Christians.

...unless all Christians are actually a parody. Damn, I'm really not going to be able to take anyone's religious sensitivities seriously now, my immediate reaction will be "Damn, that's hilarious satire, you genuinely sound like you actually believe that! You're amazing!" and walk off.

Thanks for lumping us with these people. Stereotyping against people of faith is OK, because that's what's cool on Massassi!

EDIT: Just so we're clear, I'm not defending the sort of people this site may or may not be parodying.
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http://forums.theplothole.net
2009-01-13, 2:56 PM #14
I suppose you could possibly class a reptile as a dinosaur but whatever.

Sounds like sarcasm to me.
2009-01-13, 2:57 PM #15
Originally posted by Gebohq:
Thanks for lumping us with these people. Stereotyping against people of faith is OK, because that's what's cool on Massassi!


You just stereotyped massassians....
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 3:05 PM #16
Originally posted by Xzero:
I suppose you could possibly class a reptile as a dinosaur but whatever.

Sounds like sarcasm to me.


nah u can't
2009-01-13, 3:06 PM #17
Originally posted by Deadman:
You just stereotyped massassians....

Yes I did. My hypocrisy, however, does not make my first statement any less right.
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2009-01-13, 3:16 PM #18
Actually it kinda does.
You did the exact thing you accused Mort of. You just aren't being religiously offensive.
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 3:33 PM #19
Originally posted by Deadman:
Actually it kinda does.
You did the exact thing you accused Mort of. You just aren't being religiously offensive.

I don't have my one book handy, and I can't quite find the exact thing I had in mind online at the moment, but this will have to do for now:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypocrisy#A_Common_Fallacy
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2009-01-13, 3:37 PM #20
Yeah yeah yeah I'm always the first to make that argument. Also the first to point out everyone is a hypocrite. But pasting that blanket statement doesn't help here.
You can't get all offended by something, do the exact same thing, and expect your argument to remain strong.
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 3:40 PM #21
Hey, kid...

Wanna read some Ayn Rand?
Hey, Blue? I'm loving the things you do. From the very first time, the fight you fight for will always be mine.
2009-01-13, 3:47 PM #22
Originally posted by Deadman:
Yeah yeah yeah I'm always the first to make that argument. Also the first to point out everyone is a hypocrite. But pasting that blanket statement doesn't help here.
You can't get all offended by something, do the exact same thing, and expect your argument to remain strong.

I'm simply saying that me, being a hypocrite in this case, does not make the statement "Mort-Hog is stereotyping Christians" any less true. So yes, it does help, because you're trying to claim that the statement is LESS TRUE because of what I've done. If you wish to claim that my argument will fall on deaf ears because of my hypocrisy, then I can't argue with you there, but that's a different claim.
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2009-01-13, 4:12 PM #23
Originally posted by Deadman:
And then theres this lovely image drawn by a child of just twenty two and a half years old


aw skeet skeet skeet y'all christians
If you think the waiters are rude, you should see the manager.
2009-01-13, 5:38 PM #24
Originally posted by Gebohq:
I'm simply saying that me, being a hypocrite in this case, does not make the statement "Mort-Hog is stereotyping Christians" any less true. .

That wasn't my point, I think you kinda missed the whole conversation we just had.


Speaking of missing something:

Should I know what
Originally posted by Michael MacFarlane:
aw skeet skeet skeet y'all christians


means? o_O
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 5:40 PM #25
ets en da picshur
2009-01-13, 5:46 PM #26
Originally posted by Deadman:
That wasn't my point, I think you kinda missed the whole conversation we just had.

I guess I did...?
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2009-01-13, 5:55 PM #27
Originally posted by Gebohq:
My hypocrisy, however, does not make my first statement any less right.


Originally posted by Deadman:
Actually it kinda does.


Originally posted by Gebohq:
I'm simply saying that me, being a hypocrite in this case, does not make the statement "Mort-Hog is stereotyping Christians" any less true


Originally posted by Deadman:
That wasn't my point


blargles
2009-01-13, 5:59 PM #28
Guess that makes two then saber :p

*sigh* nevermind -_-


woah, :p isn't an emoticon?
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 6:00 PM #29
:P
2009-01-13, 6:47 PM #30
I'M NOT GRUMPY :argh:




Just misunderstood. :(
I can't wait for the day schools get the money they need, and the military has to hold bake sales to afford bombs.
2009-01-13, 6:59 PM #31
God probably wouldn't have loved you anyway ;)
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-13, 7:03 PM #32
Originally posted by Deadman:
God probably wouldn't have loved you anyway ;)


I feel empty now.... I'm gonna go drink some more coffe now. :saddowns:
I can't wait for the day schools get the money they need, and the military has to hold bake sales to afford bombs.
2009-01-13, 7:06 PM #33
Catch up on some secular tv while you're at it
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2009-01-14, 2:15 AM #34
Originally posted by Gebohq:
I'm simply saying that me, being a hypocrite in this case, does not make the statement "Mort-Hog is stereotyping Christians" any less true. So yes, it does help, because you're trying to claim that the statement is LESS TRUE because of what I've done. If you wish to claim that my argument will fall on deaf ears because of my hypocrisy, then I can't argue with you there, but that's a different claim.


Damn right I'm stereotyping Christians. The whole point of religious identity is that it can, to some degree, be stereotyped. You all fundamentally believe the same 'thing' (for Christians, it'll be some nonsense regarding Jesus ****ing Christ). Homogenisation of thought is the whole point of religion.

And I have absolutely no respect for this. In fact, the idea that religious belief should be inherently deserving of respect is something I am very opposed to.

But thanks to this site, I am now going to find Christians hilarious, not just stupid!
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2009-01-14, 10:38 AM #35
Originally posted by Deadman:
Should I know what


means? o_O


The dreadlocked man (Lil John, perhaps?) in the picture is saying that.

And I just realized that in the middle of the picture the dinosaur is assisting someone in a holy water kegstand. Incredible.

Best of all, perhaps, is this account of an expedition to find Apatosaurs in the African jungle. It reads like it was written by some nineteenth-century explorer with an awesome beard.
If you think the waiters are rude, you should see the manager.
2009-01-14, 10:59 AM #36
Mort, homogenization of thought is the whole point of society
2009-01-14, 11:55 AM #37
Quote:
Stubbingwicke was an Evolutionist! What's more, he was involved in a conspiracy to stymie our attempt to uncover evidence that would vindicate Creation Science. But who exactly was he working for? The NCSE? The Smithsonian? The American Atheists? The usual suspects fluttered through my mind like bitter, God-less butterflies as I reeled from this revelation


yes
2009-01-14, 12:05 PM #38
Oh....My.... God....

[http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/art/kidzart-tommy_holy_spirt_fill.png]

I thought that was bad but THEN...

[http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/art/kidzart-earl.png]

Thats wrong on SOO many levels..
2009-01-14, 12:05 PM #39
Originally posted by saberopus:
blargles


blargles
2009-01-14, 12:28 PM #40
Okay, it's a fake. Real life is hilarious, but it's seldom this hilarious.
If you think the waiters are rude, you should see the manager.
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