Now, i dont want to offend anyone, but why do jehovas witnesses come to your door? Does anyone ever listen to them? What do you do to turn them down? My favourite is to hand them a book on evolution and tell them about your beliefs.

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In soviet Russia, thread posts YOU!

I warn them, then I tell them I have guns, lots of guns. Then they leave.

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mir·ow ( V ) Pronunciation Key (meer-oh)
Someone or something that possesses unfathomable awesomeness

I remember we once just finished painting the stairs so we blocked them off. A Jehovas Witness moved our mini blockade aside and walks up the stairs >.<

Another time I was at my friends, one came by and asked "Would you like to join our religion" and my friend said "Only if you buy my girl scout cookies"

Good times.

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(>º_º)> ±h³ ѳv³®-£ⁿd¡תּ9 §±ºr¥ <(º_º<) | (>º_º)> תּℓζ ШǿѓЖ§|-Юρ <(º_º<)

haha...my friends' personal favorite way to get rid of them was to invite them round back to help with a goat sacrifice.

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Tell me not in mournful numbers, Life is but an empty dream, For the soul is dead that slumbers, and things are not as they seem. Life is real, Life is ernest, the grave is not it's goal; Dust thou art, Dust thou returnest, Was not spoken of the soul.
~William Shakespeare

1:Pretend to care what they're talking about

2: make an excuse to leave the door, promising you'll be back in a min.

3:close door(lock door if you can do it with out them noticing)

4:time how long they stay

5:see if you can beat that record next time one comes

Ugh.. I hate when people do this

These people believe in their religion enough that they want EVERYONE to be helped, and if this is the best way to do it, then gosh darn it they'll do it. They want to save you, and you just give them hell, along with 75% of the people they say on their route...

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"Just remember -- No matter how bad things get, Northern Minnesota will always be there"
-- Garrison Keeler

Used to let my dog loose on them.

Never been bothered since.

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WAITER: Here’s your green salad, sir.
ANAKIN: What? You fool, I told you NO CROUTONS! Aaaaaaargh!

According to my mate his cousin had an axe with red paint on it next to his door which he put up his sleeve if he saw them coming, then he left it poking out slightly, unfortunately the police came round that night.

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In soviet Russia, thread posts YOU!

We've got a city-enforced "no solicitors" warning, so we've not seen JW's for a while. When they did come to our door, we simply told them, "No, thanks. We're not interested," and the people were content to move onto the next house.

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<ubuu> does hitler have a last name?
<jipe> .. yes, Ubuu, we're racist commy nazi jews, and we hate male pattern baldness
<Professor`K> Sorry, but half-way through your logic, my head exploded

Answer the door.

Naked.

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Just say: "No thanks. I'm still full from the last Jehova's Witness that came around. Why don't you come back tomorrow around lunch time?"

My classic reply is "sorry, but we're godless heathens doomed to a life of torment and misery."

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Wise men say that fools rush in where angels fear to tread, so look before you leap, so to speak, because the grass is not always greener on the other side of the hill.

Most the people around here are a bit dull really, and I don't usually get Jehovas Witnesses, so when I did I was a bit excited really. I mean, I've had people try to convert me before, but not like this.
They came only second to the fellows in Finnsbury Park trying to convert me to radical Islam.
I thought the Jehovah's Witnesses were fairly interesting, and I had a nice discussion with them. They were playing the anti-American card, but not very well, as it really had nothing to do with anything at all. I get sort of irritated when people do that, just throw it in to make them more popular.
We talked for a while and after flooding me with a dozen or so leaflets (which burnt very well to start up the stove), they walked off.

I did some research after that, and I am now armed with a barrage of questions and I plan to slaughter them. with my mind.

I thought it was quite amusing. I didn't really have anything to do. I expect the milkman, the postman, but not the debateman.

I can imagine that this novelty might be lost on you if you have such people calling regularly, but I look forward to their next visit.

I was going to say google it, and I did. Quite frankly, I'm appalled by what I found. I don't want to link to a few of the articles I found, because I'm not sure of their validity, but if they are true, Jehova's Witnesses are.. really.. well, I don't know how to say this.. the life of a JW sounds really really.. uncomfortable..

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Have a good one,
Freelancer

"So, youre Jehova's Witness? I'm Cthulhu's Defense Attorney.."

There was a really old very kinda curmudgeony kinda bulldoglooking very devout Jehovah's Witness in the phi of western religion course i took. He got frustrated a good bit, and frequently went on tirades and tangents about things which had utterly nothing to do with the topic at hand. And he'd do it incessantly. And answer unrelated questions and go on these. Finally the teacher [retired old catholic priest guy, with a little white beard that you just wanted to put on a shelf and pinch his cheeks] finally told him off. Then one day he came into class saying he got married over the weekend and was never seen again.

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[Blue Mink Bifocals !] [fsck -Rf /world/usr/] [<!-- kalimonster -->] [Capite Terram]
"That's why we had to beat you with tennis rackets".
NPC.Interact::PressButton($'Submit');

In my experience, its not a good idea to try to find out about ANY religion by going to a search engine and looking it up that way. I've yet to find a good site on any religion doing that that actually gives truthful, un-biased information.

one of them was basically a man and his wife who had been raised JW, and he gave an account of getting excommunicated because he gave permission for his daughter to have a blood transfusion that would save her life. He gave accounts of being ordered to spy on other members, being forced to meet a quota of selling magazines, and a mandatory 100 hours per month of going door-to-door. He said even as a small child, he would go door to door.

The "Watchtower Society", which is supposedly God's mouthpiece to the earth, ordered him to their headquarters in NY and he was told he would be doing important administrative work for the church, and that he would receive a much better education than he would going to college. After all, JW's are discouraged from attending college. For what reas is anyone's guess. When he arrived, he was forced to work in a factory binding books for 14 dollars per month. Can you say cult? And of course, this "education" was nothing more than hard labor.

He accounts his recovery from being a JW, by studying the Bible, which they are forbidden to do without the aid of special literature. the "elders" found out he was secretyl studying the bible and they had a trial for him, and added a bunch of stuff to his permanent "file", which would follow him wherever he went. This doesn't sound like a church to me.

And, why would he lie? After all that crap they did to him, he was still nice about it and described becoming a Christian. What does he have to gain from it?

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Have a good one,
Freelancer

http://www.religioustolerance.org/

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<ubuu> does hitler have a last name?
<jipe> .. yes, Ubuu, we're racist commy nazi jews, and we hate male pattern baldness
<Professor`K> Sorry, but half-way through your logic, my head exploded

True. That's why you read several sites, from the people who are/have following/followed the religion.

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For a healty meal, eat mashed potatoes, peas, and catloaf.
Massassi's cuttin' into my free time, man.
Valuable Life Lesson: Frog + Potato Gun = Blindness
Worship Examples - Christians' love for God should be seen and heard, not merely talked about. It is through actions that one is determined to be Christian, not through words. Words (and thoughts, as well) deceive even one's own self, but the heart speaks truth.

[This message has been edited by DogSRoOL (edited August 29, 2004).]

and that's unbiased information?

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║ TheJkWhoSaysNi║ -----@% (Snail racing. ) .║
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║Warning: This post may contain traces of nut║
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It's better than information from groups against the religion you're trying to learn about. They follow it, so they know how it works.

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For a healty meal, eat mashed potatoes, peas, and catloaf.
Massassi's cuttin' into my free time, man.
Valuable Life Lesson: Frog + Potato Gun = Blindness
Worship Examples - Christians' love for God should be seen and heard, not merely talked about. It is through actions that one is determined to be Christian, not through words. Words (and thoughts, as well) deceive even one's own self, but the heart speaks truth.

They will also disassociate themselves from family members if they attend a different church (even if only once).
Very loving.

[This message has been edited by DogSRoOL (edited August 29, 2004).]

Ditto. In fact, I'm nice to them. Hell they need it after hundreds of people give them hell.

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There is no signature

Lots of the sites I've seen are from people who DID follow the religion and they still give incorrect information about it.

If a JW comes to your door, just say your mormon.

I thought mormons were nuts, but JW scare the hell out of me.

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The easiest way to kill a soldier is to make his commanding officer a politician.

So Christians can argue with them. (Do Mormons call them selves Christians or what? I duno. Pretty wierd what ever it is.)
Mormons not morons. That was a rather amusing typo.

[This message has been edited by Obi_Kwiet (edited August 30, 2004).]

Hell, the JWs are a cult. I thought everyone knew that.

Scientologists are even more wacked out, and some people say that their "church" is just a front for organized crime. Makes sense, b/c what better way to evade taxes than to turn your organization into a religion?




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I have found that you can transform your character solely by the power of belief: as you believe yourself to be, so you shall become over time.

The president of the church encourages it.

(oops, sorry. I thought you said Mormon. O_o)

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The easiest way to kill a soldier is to make his commanding officer a politician.

[This message has been edited by Kieran Horn (edited August 29, 2004).]

Morons, hehe.

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║ TheJkWhoSaysNi║ -----@% (Snail racing. ) .║
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║Warning: This post may contain traces of nut║
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I'm kinda fed up with Jehovas to be honest. The local chapter around here resorts to some really silly tactics to get you talking at the door.

End of last year I answered the door and there was a man and a woman there saying they wanted to talk to me about the farmer's crisis caused by the drought....which is fair enough to I listened and we discussed the drought. Then he went to give me a booklet on the plight of the farmers....as he gives it to me a copy of the Watchtower falls out; he'd hidden it in the back of the farm crisis booklet. At that point he gave up all pretence about giving a crap about the farmers and started asking personal questions.

I'm sorry, but that royally pisses me off. It's bad enough they come to your home, but to misrepresent themselves like that is just pathetic. People can follow whatever religion they want as far as I care, but don't come harrass me at home and resort to silly games to get my attention. It's just as annoying as telemarketers.

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

Agreed, IF JW(or any one for that matter) want to preach religion in a public place in a non-intrusive way More power to them.
heck I'll be the politest person they'll meet..

But has soon soon has you start taking steps to sell your religeion in a way you Know annoyes the Heck out of people at home it crosses a line..

Besides, If any thing that door to door crap really discredits pretty much any thing they have to say..

My dad works continental shifts, to provide for my family, ie he works 7 days a week, but gets 2 days off that rotate during the week. One Sunday he was washing the car, because it needed doing...

A JW walked past our house and ask my dad "How dare you clean your car on the sabbath?!"

He basically replied along the lines of...

"I work EVERY day of the F***ing week, who the **** are you to tell me when the **** to wash my ****ing car?! Piss off and don't ever come back here or I'll break your ****ing legs!"

I've never been so proud of my dad losing his temper

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If at first you don't succeed, lower your standards.

Answer the door in a pair of soiled boxers and a dirty, wrinkled wifebeater. Make sure your hair is unkempt. Have porn blaring from the TV as LOUDLY AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE. Invite them in for a chat. They'll run away screaming, guaranteed.


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http://www.jedilegacy.net/gonk/

Good god, what kind of JW do you get around there Martyn, Jaiph? Here they just come to your door, "Wanna hear what I have to say?", "No thanks.", "Okay, have a nice day."

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There is no signature

This one JW lady and her daughter come to my house every once in a while and want to talk to my mom -- my mom and she are friends (I guess -- it's hard to tell if she is or if she's just being nice). If my mom's not home, the lady gives me some JW info pamphlets or something to look at.

If they try to talk me into converting, I'd say "no, I'm not interested" (then I'd add "get a life, jeez!" ).

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nytfyre m0d || f33l t3h p0w3r || t3h l0st c0gz || OMF > *

I'd hate to be the one to tell you guys this, but you're all pretty well misinformed. It's a religion, and like any other religion they preach what they believe in, and they do not force their opinions on anyone.

Now I don't know any of you, so I don't have the right to say that I'm disappointed in you, but it is a damn shame that instead of going to the source that you rely on what you find on the internet. I'll just leave it at that, I'm pretty disgusted right now.

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"I'm praying for mayhem, I'm praying for tidal waves, I wanna see the ground give way, I wanna watch it all go down..."

I hope you READ what happened (ie read what I wrote) before you say you're disgusted with me/my dad...

...if you did, then fair, enough, be disgusted, but asking someone in the street "How dare they" wash their own car is not on thank you very much.

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If at first you don't succeed, lower your standards.

We have a kingdom hall just round the corner, so we get all the local nutjobs...

(Disclaimer to all those easily offended: I mean we get the worst of the JW's, not that all JW's are nutjobs...)

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If at first you don't succeed, lower your standards.

You know, I'm not going to get neck deep in another pointless argument here at Massassi, but I am going to tell you that I'm not here to justify anyones actions. I was pretty clear in my statement, I'm out right disgusted.

It wasn't even about your post Martyn, since JW's have nothing to do with the Sabbath or whatever, but it's about all of the immature remarks and the spreading of lies. So all of you continue on, I'm done here.

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"I'm praying for mayhem, I'm praying for tidal waves, I wanna see the ground give way, I wanna watch it all go down..."

Yeah, they want to save me. If you had any idea how many times I've heard that - from all kinds of christians, not just these guys. It's annoying, and it just pisses me off. Not to mention how disrespectful it is to try and 'convert' someone. You're basicly walking up to them and saying "what you believe is wrong, and what I believe is right". You think it's bad that I give them hell? They should consider themselves lucky I can resist the urge to punch them in the face. I have zero respect for these people.


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WAITER: Here’s your green salad, sir.
ANAKIN: What? You fool, I told you NO CROUTONS! Aaaaaaargh!