Have I said recently I'm really geeky?
I'm really geeky.

So, after having just finished LoEG 2, I'm seriously scarred (Mr. Hyde having anal sex with the invisible man till he dies?), but, to quote another scarrd and deformed individual, "my resolve has never been stronger".
Okay, LoEG '55, which I've discussed here a few times, I believe, features more contemporary characters, and a few that harken back to the good old days.


Source: The Shadow radio serials, comics, and movies
A young playboy fom New York by the name of Lamont Cranston had been endowed by his creator with unbelievable powers of the mind, which he squandered in the far east as an opium druglord. After years of evil, sinful behavior, Lamont was disciplined and then re-trained as a crimefighter by a powerful mage. He returned to New York and did good deeds, building an intricate network of spies. After the British Museum, headquarters of the League, was raided by a sinister cadre of evildoers, the Shadow was hired by British Military Intelligence to track down the robbers before they could use the powerful items they had stolen.


Source: The 007 novels and films
During WWII, it was not uncommon for young men to join the military in order to defend their country. One fo these young men was a brilliant and athletic fellow named James Bond, who joined British Military intelligence. At the end of the war, he was promoted to the rank of 1st sergeant and assigned to accompany, take care of, and act as a liason for the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, a traditional group of riff raff and misfits who performed dubious acts in the name of the crown. Prevented from promotion to Agent by a man of some standing in the upper echelons referred to only as "Q", James grew bitter. His only allies in the group were a hired gun from America named Kato and the brilliant professor Quatermass. After the raid of the British Museum, Bond was made an honorary member of the league and required to seek out various person who could assist Mi5 in finding their lost toys.


Source: The Green Hornet radio serials, TV show, and comics
A Japanese man, hailing from the Philipines, Kato endured much racial discrimination until he joined a Mr. Britt Reid in California. Reid was better known as the Green Hornet, and employed Kato for a long time in his fight against evil. However, due to Kato's increasing age and an injury he received foiling a bank robbery, he retired, his young son taking his place. Kato later joined the League in the early 50's, and worked as a driver and hired gun. In early 1955, a dastardly group of thieves and villains raided the British Museum, killing all but Kato and Bond (and Quatermass, who survived by concealed his presence from the others). The two then went on an adventure to return the various devices and contrivances that had been in the museum's coffers.


Source: The Quatermass TV serials and films (and the 007 novels and films)
Professor Bernard Quatermass is a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a brown sweater and white lab coat. He was responsible for solving a number of tricky situations that endangered all of humanity (including the business with the Hobbes Lane pit) and worked with a number of brilliant scientists, including Doctors Brown and Wonka, and helped the Americans at the Groom lake and Black Mesa installations. He became a member of MI5 and had his name reduced to simply Q. He eventually joined the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, analyzing the various curiousities collected by England in her years of exploration. When James Bond joined the outfit, Quatermass refused to let him become an Agent in MI5 due to his unpredictability and lack of respect for authority. He then befriended James as Quatermass the scientist in order to improve him to the point where he would be worthy. During the raid by the mystery bandits, he faked his own death in order to more safely serve his government.


Source: The Indiana Jones films, books, and videos
Dr. Jones spent his life chasing wild artifacts and fighting Nazis. This required him to spend, on average, three days a semester at his job, after which he would depart on some damn fool idealistic crusade, flying around the world on the university's dime, coming back with nothing but crazy stories and a few mild STDs. This does not a lasting career build. After he was fired, he went into exile, exploring ancient ruins that he always wanted to see but never got to in a professional capacity. During one such foray, he was approached by the LoEG to help collect and catalogue a number of goods stolen from the British Museum.

{EDIT OMG} The Character Map is now at the bottom of the page.

-For the old art, http://forums.massassi.net/vb3/showthread.php?t=17293

I don't think people want to hear about anal sex...

Everything from Half Life to The Terminator to Reno 911. Genius.

Oh, and make sure you somehow include the star gate crew and atleast one of the Teen Titans.

[QUOTE=Ifrit Zero]:eek:
I don't think people want to hear about anal sex...[/QUOTE]
Well than Mr. Moore should have restrained himself.

-Somehow I find it very comforting to think that Willy Wonka worked at Black Mesa, perhaps even as a designer of the facility. It explains a lot.

I <3 Dr. Strangelove.

“In the mid-time of the 19th century after our savior’s birth, the ice shall threaten the world. One who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men, one whose future is paved with beauties and beasts, one who has died in time but returned to mortality, one who has held the holy chalice, one who served the hornet and dons black, and one who darts through the sky so red shall be summoned to halt the impending doom.”
-Unknown, “Gloom, Doom, and Other Scary Prophecies to Watch Out For”, 1937

History has shown that no single man or woman is capable of halting the flow of events. Only groups can do that.
The idea of a group of super-humans saving humanity from its ills hearkens back to the ancient times, when the mountains were young and the forests fair. The earliest recorded group of this kind was Jason and his band of merry Argonauts.
Throughout history, various such groups have been gathered together to fend off some form of evil. In Britain, there was Prospero and his group whose travels are well documented to this day.
In the mid seventeenth century, there existed in the American colonies a similar group. Little is known about it, as the only recordings of this group’s existence have been culled from the diary of a member who later joined the British (a group referred to as the Society of Extraordinary Gentlemen), thus having his personal affects preserved in the British Museum.
This group, referred to as the “Fathers of Liberty”, preceded the American Revolution by almost a hundred years. The records are unclear as the number or identity of the members, but this much is clear:
There was the member who joined the British, a man named “Leatherstocking.” He was raised by savages and fought like a frontiersman. He is, therefore, unworthy of comment.
There was a fellow refereed to as Chillingworth, apparently a widower. He traversed the American wilds with Leatherstocking, learning the many strange poisons and antidotes present in the many amazing flora. He helped the Fathers in their scientific efforts, when such concerns arose.
There was a strange figure, only spoken of as “the Doctor”. Apparently, this man, if man he be, brought the Fathers together to, it would seem, sow the seeds of rebellion in the colonies. This man also helped them destroy a mysterious enemy who called himself “the Master”.
Curiously, the diary entries in which this knowledge is present are written on modern pulp paper, created at a textile mill in Minnesota. This bizarre anachronism has led many to believe the documents to be cheap forgeries, though their presence at the British Museum has been documented for a fair amount of time.
Soon, Leatherstocking left the group and worked for the British. This group has also been well documented.
The American frontier gave birth to many more groups of this peculiar nature as time went on. There was, for instance, the group of southerners after the civil war who struck down a devious mastermind by the name of Loveless (Jebediah Duke, Jane Thrift, John Gray, and Nathaniel Reynolds and is also well documented in its journeys and adventures). Later, there was the curiously familiar story of the seven magnificent gunmen at a small Mexican village. Sometime around then there was a strange adventure undertaken by a man named “Pecos”, a lumberjack of massive proportions, a railroad working negro whose duel with a steam powered device was legendary, a cowboy named Chase (rumored to be endowed with amazing magical powers) and again this shadowy figure named “Doctor”. The figure has been encountered by many groups in many capacities, always under a new visage it seems. This is, to say the least, curious.
In the 1890’s, British Military Intelligence recruited a number of oddballs and misfits in order to retrieve a material called Cavorite (it later was revealed that this was for very nefarious purposes, as is well known). The group also played a crucial role in the so-called War of the Worlds, blockading London as they delivered a terrible scourge upon the aliens. Later, the surviving members reunited for a series of adventures that led them from the depths of darkest America to the brilliant cities of Africa.
And then, there was the curious events surrounding the formation of the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen in the 1950’s…

Annotations:

“In the mid-time of the 19th century after our savior’s birth, the ice shall threaten the world. One who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men, one whose future is paved with beauties and beasts, one who has died in time but returned to mortality, one who has held the holy chalice, one who served the hornet and dons black, and one who darts through the sky so red shall be summoned to halt the impending doom.”
This describes the LoEG as it stands in the 1950’s, as well as its quest. The ice is Ice-9, the apocalyptic substance from “Cat’s Cradle” by Kurt Vonnegut

“The earliest recorded group of this kind was Jason and his band of merry Argonauts”
This is a reference to the Greek Myth of the Argonauts, who traveled to the ends of the Earth in order to seek out the Golden Fleece. It contained many heroes of Greek Myth. In addition, the Argonauts are referred to as merry, which they decidedly were not. This is instead a reference to Robin Hood and his Merry Men.

“In Britain, there was Prospero and his group whose travels are well documented”
This group is described in the “New Traveler’s Almanac” section of LoEG Volume 2, and is quite entertaining.

“This group, referred to as the ‘Fathers of Liberty’, preceded the American Revolution by almost a hundred years”
“Sons of Liberty” was the name of the American Revolutionary group in Boston. The term has since been expanded in many new and interesting manners.

“There was the member who joined the British, a man named ‘Leatherstocking.’”
This is Natty Bumpo, from the book “Last of the Mohicans”, amongst others, who was featured in LoEG Volume 1, issue 2 as a member of a former league.

“There was a fellow refereed to as Chillingworth, apparently a widower.”
This is Roger “Chillingworth” Prynne of “The Scarlet Letter”, a book by Nathaniel Hawthorne, who uses the word “bosom” 37 times in it. Roger Prynne is described in his introductory passage as:
“clad in a strange disarray of civilized and savage costume. He was small in stature, with a furrowed visage, which, as yet, could hardly be termed aged. There was a remarkable intelligence in his features, as of a person who had so cultivated his mental part that it could not fail to mould the physical to itself, and become manifest by unmistakable tokens.”
It is later revealed that he has been traveling in the wilderness, learning native secrets (presumably from Bumpo). Hester refers to herself many times in the book as a widow, so presumably the deception goes both ways.

“There was a strange figure, only spoken of as ‘the Doctor’”
None other than Doctor Who, of course.

“helped them destroy a mysterious enemy who called himself ‘the Master’”
The Doctor’s main adversary and fellow time-traveler.

“the group of southerners after the civil war who struck down a devious mastermind by the name of Loveless”
This group, and it’s mission, are detailed in the fan fic “The League of Extraordinary Heroes”, by “the Visitor”, available at this page: http://the-visitor.bravepages.com/league/loeh.html

“curiously familiar story of the seven magnificent gunmen at a small Mexican village”
This is the Magnificent Seven, from the movie of the same name. The story is curiously familiar because it’s a remake of The Seven Samurai, an excellent film by Akira Kurosawa.

“strange adventure undertaken by a man named ‘Pecos’, a lumberjack of massive proportions, a railroad working negro whose duel with a steam powered device was legendary, a cowboy named Chase (rumored to be endowed with amazing magical powers) and again this shadowy figure named ‘Doctor’”
The first three characters mentioned (Pecos Bill, Paul Bunyan, and John Henry) are the main characters in a mid-90’s film called “Tall Tale” which, though cheesy, is quite entertaining. They are also classic characters of American folklore. The Doctor is, again, Doctor Who. Chase, however, is a reference to the popular novel of William Gibson, “Neuromancer”. In it, a man named Chase, who calls himself a cowboy, lives in futuristic Japan and uses his amazing (though not magical) powers to hack into super-tough security systems. Presumably, this Chase is an ancestor.

“1890’s, British Military Intelligence recruited a number of oddballs and misfits”
This is the League as detailed in the first series.

“retrieve a material called Cavorite”
The League’s first mission in the series.

“so-called War of the Worlds, blockading London as they delivered a terrible scourge upon the aliens.”
Detailed further in the second volume.

“Later, the surviving members reunited for a series of adventures that led them from the depths of darkest America to the brilliant cities of Africa.”
This describes the contents of the New Traveler’s Almanac. It should be mentioned that “depths of darkest” is usually used to describe Africa, and “brilliant cities” to describe America. This inversion is due to the fact that the majority of the adventures had in America during the League’s foray there revolve around very dark things (Thinking Machine adventures, Flatland, The Cthulhu Mythos), whereas Africa’s adventure takes them to many ancient civilizations still mighty and powerful in their own right.

“And then, there was the curious events surrounding the formation of the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen in the 1950’s…”
This is where our story begins.
It should be noted that many times Alan Moore has said he wished to make a league set in the 50’s that included the Jack Kerouac characters Sal Paradise, Dean Moriarty (a grandson of James Moriarty, foe of Sherlock) and Dr. Sax. These characters are killed off immediately in our story, in order to allow a certain frantic pace to descend on the reader. Plus, the author is unfamiliar with these characters.

-Okeedokee, any suggestions for Fathers of Liberty members? I deliberately left it open. Also, it seems that Nick Calloway is actually Nick Carraway. Oops. I shall be certain to fix this when I post a new copy of the map.

Okay, can anybody guess what these are?

Four of the swords kept at League headquarters before it was bombed and raided. These are now in the hands of the enemy.
Unfortunately, none of these are textures, but the colors are right.


Name: The Vorpal Sword.
Source: Jabberwocky (by Lewis Carroll)
Backstory: Found during an expedition led by Dr. Jones into the now-legendary Godstow/Folly Bridge anomaly ( http://www.enjolrasworld.com/Jess%20Nevins/League%20of%20Extraordinary%20Gentlemen%202/Notes%20on%20League%20of%20Extraordinary%20Gentlemen%20V2%201.htm Scroll down to the page 28 annotation) During which all but 18 of the original 60 members were killed by mysterious dragon-like creatures. The sword, if sword it be, is made up of many segments of blade, strung together by a thin metallic cord. It is unclear as to what purpose it served, as it's far too ugly to be a ceremonial sword, and has no clear method of operation in combat.
Comments: I had a lot of trouble coming up with this. I could go with the DnD Vorpal, which means really really sharp but otherwise exactly the same as any normal sword. Boring. I once saw an entertaining picture on the internet that featured it as basically a cracked and dented buster sword type thing, but that seemed too unserious. Then, I read the poem a few more times and began to wonder about the sound "Snicker-snack". Why the hell would a sword make that noise? Because, it's really a sword/whip hybrid (like in Soul Calibur or whatever), strung together by some sort of eldritch glowing energy thing. I also wanted to get some lightsaber imagery in there, as well as a sense that this wasn't made by or for human hands. Hence, the weird swirly bits and the claws and everything.


Name: Green Destiny
Source: Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Backstory: The mystical Jade Blade was on loan from the Chinese government during the revolution, and the British government kept it. Ancient legend says that the sword has been fought over a great deal ever since it's creation. Looks like peaceful times for Green Destiny... for now.
Comments: I loved and hated doing this one. Mostly hated. Because I'm gonna have to texture in all the obscene little carvings on the blade (who the hell carves on the blade of a sword anyways? Guh), and I hate texturing. Oh well.


Name: Excalibur
Source: Arthurian Legend
Backstory: Who doesn't know what Excalibur is? Found in a dried lakebed clutched by the skeleton of an ancient woman, it's finally in the hands of mother England again.
Comments: "Don't touch that! James, don't let Cranston touch Excalibur!" "Why not?" "It's Excalibur! He's American! It's probably high treason or something!" Not a lot of agreement on what it looks like, so I cherry-picked some features from a lot of designs.


Name: Anduril
Source: Lord of the Rings
Backstory: An archeological dig at an ancient royal burial site located this bizarre sword. On the surface, it seems just like any other sword, if maybe a little shinier. However, when X-Rayed for archival purposes, it was revealed that there were ancient fractures inside the "Flame of the West" (as it was called on the crumbling sheath), fractures that had aparently... healed. An inscription deep inside the blade named it "Narsil", though many ancient language scholars including Professor Tolkien claim that the sheath labels it "Anduril". Both names are listed until the matter is resolved.
Comments: Damn this one took a long time to make. You know why? Because LotR fans are geeky, and have had 50 years experience of being geeky. I think it came out pretty close to the movie prop.

-Which, I understand, comes out pretty close to the sword as described in the book.

Ok, so I've just read the New Traveller's ALmanac all the way up to the begining of the Africa adventures. Oh Emm Gee. My particular favorite moment is either Captain Hook at the pirates' convention being guarded and evasive about from whence he hails, or, in the midst of Lovecraftean nightmarishness hearing the tale of a mysterious and monstrous talking cat wandering the streets, tormenting people. Yes, you read that right:
The Cat in the Hat is a servant of Lovecraft's Deep Ones.
Wacky adventures in Massachusetts.
Okidoki, so here's a new list of stuff that will be adressed in the story:

Brutal Murders in Washington (the state, not the capital)! Man's head found in driving wheel a mile from the banks of the Wishkah river, body not yet found. Aberdeen Police have wife in custody, refuse to comment whether as witness or suspect, more on page 2!

Remains of hunting expedition led by famous American singer, playboy, and amatuer hunter Willam "Bungalow" Shears found in heart of African jungle, story on page 3!

Senator Muffley declares aspirations for 1960 presidency. Lifelong friend benjamin Rand says, "He's gonna take this country to the top!" Story on page 3.

Sorry, just some headlines there, now where were we...

There will be a mention of two men who worked for the American government, though it is not quite clear when they began this work or for how long they were in operation. It is clear, however, that Misters B.A. and L.C. interacted with at least two members of the 1898 League...

There will be a mention (probably in a revision of the earlier posted introduction) of a group of warriors predating Jason and his band of Merry Argonauts, their journeys recorded in an artifact found near the "Flame of the West", an ancient text roughly translated as the "Red Book of Westmarch" by Professor Tolkien.

There will be more mentions of Suess characters, now that the hole has been opened by Mr. Moore.

-this is just scratching-the-surface stuff. Right now I'm writing a backstory for Quatermass that links the events of "The Quatermass Conclusion" with the knowledge that he is actually Q.

New Character map.

-Some new additions. Some are quite silly.

I don't understand this AT ALL. PLEASE tell me what's going on.

...
Well, this is always fun to hear, 10 posts into a topic, that someone doesn't get it.
Let's go procedurally.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a comic book series by Alan Moore and Kevin O'Neil. It was adapted (disasterously) as a movie starring Sean Connery.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen consists of Allan Quartermain (from H.R. Raggard's Quartermain series), a sort of great white hunter/explorer archetype (from whom we get Indianna Jones); Wilhemina Murray, heroine (actually, damsel in distress, but she's a sufragette now) of Bram Stoker's Dracula; Captain Nemo, from Jules Verne's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, which I'm sure we're all at least passingly familliar with; Dr. Hawley Griffin, H.G. Wells' Invisible Man (he fakes his death apparently); Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Robert Louis Stevenson's proto Hulk (and apparently a commentary on Homosexual urges, as evidenced in Hyde's killing of Griffin in the middle of the second volume by sodomizing him to death and subsequent claim that Jekyll's only two "sins" were "borrowing a book and never returning and sometimes thinking of other men while playing with himself"); Campion Bond, a back-engineering of James Bond (happens a lot in the League series: whenever a character is needed but doesn't fit in the time perios, it's always his or her father or mother, etc) and coincidentally the fattest, meanist, most slimy greaseball Mason in all of British Military Intelligence; (briefly) Professor James Moriarty, "the Napolean of Crime", Sherlock Holmes' greatest enemy and boss of the League until they foil his evil plan involving Cavorite; Mycroft Holmes, Sherlock's older, portly, smarter, reclusive brother; (briefly) August C. Dupin, Edgar Allen Poe's brilliant detective; and the Wolf of Kabul, who I am not yet familliar with.
That's the easy half of the explaination.
Don't watch the movie, read the comic. It's vastly superior and just plain cool at times (although at other times things like Hyde butt-shecksing the
Invisible man to death happen and it's scary and funny at the same time).

-Any questions?

Oh em gee.

-I just noticed I called him "Bud Abobot". Fixing the Master copy as we speak.

I'm actually a comic nut, so I'm amazed I've never heard of this, why wouldn't I have?

Weird. It's really good. You should be able to check it out at your local library, after all, it is pretty much a victorian novella. Except illustrated...
And, with, like, more graphic violence and stuff...

-There's been at least one copy at every library system I've seen in the past, say, three years?

Will do. Seems interesting enough. So this character map, what in the world is it?

It seemed funner than just listing characters and mentioning their relationships wo each other (though I do that with the main characters), and easier than creating an interactive hypertext cross-referenced index. A Character map is a graphic display of each character's relationship. Thus, we have Benjamin Rand (Being there) who mentored Senator Muffley (Dr. Strangelove) who is a friend of Lamont Cranston (the shadow) who went to a party at the Overlook Lodge (The Shining) with Nick Carraway (The Great Gatsby) who is the father of the Narrarator Fight Club (and thusly, of Tyler Durden).

-It doesn't have items or events on it, and there's still some characters missing.

Okay, wait, so you're just blathering about someone elses work? Why do you have things like Black Mesa on there? You aren't writing your own installment? WTF is this a showcase of?

There's too many words. Put an abbreviated version for ADD people like me.

I am writing my own installment. That's why I said

So, yes. Fan-fic/comic. I revert to my stance on geekiness as an excuse for this behavior at my age.
[edit] Actually, I now see that nowhere have I mentioned this is a fan-work of mine. Oops. Yar. Half fan-fic, half comic (though I keep saying manga because that's how I learned this geekiness), just like the original was half comic, half "supplimentary fiction". Even if this wasn't a showcase of my writing (it is, hence the little introduction thing I posted), it's a showcase of character profiles, concept art, 3d models, and the character map, which I'm still working on (Next I think I'll add either some villains, some more main characters, or the mental hospital and all its wards (including Jack Merridrew, Holden Caufield, and others)). So...
Fan-installment.
Fan-art.
Fan-fic.
Fan-atic.

-And I thought I abbreviated pretty severely on some titles, like SC&tWoT (Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow) and C&tCF (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory)...

And on the fifth day he bumped.

-Stuff tomorrow. New entry, sorta.

And twenty-four minutes into the sixth day, he posted.
This is the background of Quatermass, IE why it is he's also Q. Complicated...

Huffity, puffity, Ringstone Round,
If you loose your hat it will never be found,
So pull up your britches right up to your chin,
And fasten your cloak with a bright new pin,
And when you are ready then we can begin,
Huffity, puffity, Puff,
Huffity, puffity, Puff.
The words echo like a bad sound effect. Like a bad voiceover, the cinematic equivalent of a thought bubble.
Huffity, Puffity…
Blinding light… the planet people… how dare they harvest us…
Huffity, Puffity…
I’ve gotta do this… this is my last great addition to humanity…
Huffity, Puffity…
I should have spent less time at the office, maybe…
Huffity, Puffity…
Oh god it burns… detonator… detonator…
Huffity, Puffity…
You bloody bastards… the crop is fighting back…
Huffity, Puffity…
An old man dies so the youth of tomorrow can live.
Huffity, Puffity…
Fair trade.
Huffity-
Whoosh

Goddamn, I died.
I should have seen this coming.
It’s fairly obvious that I would have died.
I would have thought that heaven would be… warmer.
And without metal floors.
And this queer surgical appliance white look to everything.
And this annoying humming noise.
And this dandy old looking ******* staring down at me…

“My dear Bernard, it seems you’ve taken a spill,” the Doctor said.
Professor Bernard Quatermass, last hope for humanity and brilliant scientist, sat up and winced. His skin felt like he’d been out in the sun for about 5,000,000 years too long.
“Where…” Bernard began, before his throat closed in dryness. His clothes were singed black, he now saw. His hair, as he rubbed his head, felt crispy and rough.
“If the question you’re asking is ‘where am I?’, then I’m afraid I can’t answer you,” the Doctor responded. He wore a green coat with question marks emblazoned on it. He had a smirk that was beginning to infuriate Quatermass.
“Grandfather,” a young girl nearby said in that “I can’t believe you just did that” voice teenagers are so good at, “Why have we picked up another pathetic life-form?”
“Get the man some water, Susan,” the Doctor responded in that crotchety old man voice Quatermass had noticed in himself of late.
Quatermass got shakily to his feet, like one of those baby giraffes, legs in danger of buckling at any moment. Susan returned with some water. Quatermass greedily gulped it down.
“Come this way, Professor,” the Doctor said, then left the room. Quatermass glanced at Susan then followed the Doctor.
The Doctor walked into a room with a high, vaulted ceiling. There were two chairs seated at a small wire table. Everything was still the same white as before, but after a while… it kinda began to grow on you. The table and chairs were all of an ergonomic design. The Doctor sat at one, Quatermass at the opposite.
“I’m sure you’re confused about the events of today, Professor Quatermass,” The doctor said, folding his hands on the table.
“I set off a bomb,” Quatermass managed after a moment of throat dryness.
“Yes, yes you did, Bernard. You showed those aliens good, didn’t you?” the Doctor said, smiling.
“… Needed to save humanity” Quatermass choked out.
“Susan, get the professor another glass of water.”
Susan walked in, bearing a tray with two glasses on it. One was for Quatermass, regular water. The other… it looked very sinister. The Doctor too a sip and set it down as Quatermass re-hydrated.
“Professor Quatermass, what if I told you that you had a second chance?” the Doctor said as he finished.
It was good that he had waited. Otherwise, Quatermass would have choked up all that water.
“Second chance?” He managed, this time out of throat moisture overload, “You mean I didn’t get ‘em?”
The Doctor laughed. It was strange to hear.
“No, no, you got ‘em. You got ‘em good. But that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about giving you a second chance at life,” the Doctor got serious as he continued, “I’m talking about sending you back. Re-substantiation. Making you your old self again. Giving you a second chance to make all the mistakes again.”
Quatermass looked at him. His gaze was like the eternal void.
“You’re going to make me do all this again? Which god did I anger so terribly?”
“Oh, sorry dear boy, I didn’t mean to imply that you have to do it all again.”
“That’s exactly what you implied. And don’t call me boy, I’m at least twenty years older than you by the looks of ya.”
“You have no idea, Professor Quatermass.”

Bernard Quatermass was rowing a boat in the channel, fishing. He was catching nothing. He also happened to be trying to forget the horrendous experience he’d just had.
One of his closest friends had become a hideous monster after a trip in a rocket of Quatermass’ own design.
He’d had to electrocute him to death.
The fish weren’t biting at all. It was like something had scared them away…
His watch had stopped. Quatermass looked down at it, and tapped it and held it to his ear. This is the scientifically approved way of checking to see if a watch is broken.
A small burst of static electricity arced out and grounded on his ear from the watch.
“Ouch,” he said, then held it back.
Another arc slipped along the boat, feeding into the water.
Uh oh.
There was a sudden stuffiness… and then… light.

The next day, the boat washed up on shore. Professor Bernard Quatermass was sprawled out in it, looking severely sunburned. A bobby showed up, having spotted the boat during his rounds.
As the copper helped him out, Quatermass’ mind was ablaze.
“What you have done in your previous life is concrete. The pit is sealed, the Planet People’s god is dead. However, you must prevent further chaos from enveloping humanity. Don’t let the Black Mesa people start a resonance cascade. Don’t let the oceans freeze. Don’t let the Pod People spread. Don’t let anything… too bad happen.
“This is your second chance.”
The words faded from Quatermass’ mind. They slipped into his subconscious and buried themselves. After a few moments, the memories of the planet people and the pit and everything began to fade.

British Military Intelligence, Division 5. Supposedly controlled by the Masons. Could be, could be.
The British Museum. Long standing monument to England’s passion for the extraordinary. Ancient paintings and portraits hang in the main gallery. Shakespeare’s bald countenance smirks across the ages and the hall to the grizzled visage of one of the men he immortalized in the written word, Duke Prospero. Gathered around the hero in ancient oils were his men; Caliban, Ariel, Christian, and Owe-much. Nearby was a small bust, labeled “Dux Omnium”, their liaison to the throne.
Nearby, preserved in ink, the Society of Extraordinary Gentlemen gazed out longingly at the rest of the hall. Mr. Gulliver, the Blakeneys, Dr. Syn, Ms. Hill, and Mr. Bumpo stood haughtily, while a bust nearby, marked “K. Münchhausen”, smirked anciently.
An aging photograph further down the line showed quite a motley crew, consisting of a man ape, a woman in a scarf, a man in a hunting jacket, an Indian with a compass, and… well, some clothes. Floating clothes. Here, too, was a bust.
Marked “C. Bond”.

“The man’s family history alone is enough to reject him!” shouted general Mainwaring.
“I think he could be a valuable asset,” Special Agent Palmer responded, cleaning his glasses, “What do you think, doctor?”
Professor Bernard Quatermass sat at the table with three other men. The first was General Mainwaring, who it seemed had been destined for Military Intelligence since his first tour of duty (in France in 1919). Agent Palmer was one of MI5’s best, and Quatermass had taken a liking to him. The other man was Mainwaring’s assistant, formerly of Naval Intelligence, a stark middle aged fellow named Fleming, who was taking notes.
Quatermass set his own pencil down, still trying to draw up plans for an impossible to crack safe. Know science, no peace. No science, know peace.
“I haven’t become familiar with the young man. I assume he’s good enough to be in your little organization.”
Mainwaring rolled his eyes. “Okay, let me ask the other doctor.”
Quatermass stiffened, then pulled the file towards him.
By the time it got their, he had erased his own emotions.
“Commander Bond of Royal Naval Volunteer Reserve, trained at Camp X, learned from the best, et cetera et cetera…” Q read aloud, grumpy that his important safe safety planning was interrupted so rudely. “Ah, here we go… ‘destroyer of equipment.’ What does that mean? Is he a luddite?”
“He just uses his gadgetry very well, that’s all,” responded Palmer.
“Well, I’ll keep an eye on him, I guess. If you think he’s really that good, I’m sure I can make him great,” said a suddenly much warmer Quatermass.

A new addition to the hall, a black and white photograph. In it, a man in a dark cloak, labeled “Dr. Sax” in the captions, sipped a martini. Two young men, Mr. Paradise and Mr. Moriarty, smoked silently. A man with a small amount of chew (the brand undecipherable) in his cheek, whose caption marked him “Kane”. An Asian fellow in a black tunic loomed silently behind the partiers, denoted simply as “Kato”. Our dear professor Bernard was lounging in a chair, a cigar perched at the end of his finger tips. “Quatermass” read the caption. And, nearby, a pedestal.
Someday it would hold a bust.
Right now, it held a black and white snapshot.
A washed out face was holding out a hand in self-defense.
The plaque was labeled “J. Bond”.
Orbis non sufficit.

*Annotations*

“Huffity, puffity, Ringstone Round,
If you loose your hat it will never be found,
So pull up your britches right up to your chin,
And fasten your cloak with a bright new pin,
And when you are ready then we can begin,
Huffity, puffity, Puff,
Huffity, puffity, Puff.”
An old nursery rhyme, the basis in some ways for the film “The Quatermass Conclusion”

“Blinding light… the planet people… how dare they harvest us…”
This is a reference to the events of the Quatermass Conclusion, in which Quatermass sacrifices himself while detonating a bomb under an alien spacecraft to keep it from “harvesting” humans.

“I should have spent less time at the office, maybe…”
Often it is said that nobody on their deathbed will say “I should have spent more time at the office.” This fits in with Quatermass’ character in the final film, a somewhat grumpy old man who’s basically tired of “it”.

“You bloody bastards… the crop is fighting back…”
“You bloody bastards” is the last line of Beneath the Planet of the Apes, after which the speaker detonates a nuclear device, destroying the planet.

“An old man dies so the youth of tomorrow can live… Fair trade.”
This is an abstraction of a recurring line in the film “Sin City”, wherein Bruce Willis sacrifices himself twice for a girl. The line is “An old man dies so a young girl can live… fair trade.” Half the time, this is followed by a gunshot.

“I would have thought that heaven would be… warmer.”
It should be painfully obvious, based on the subsequent conversation, where the main character is.

“’My dear Bernard, it seems you’ve taken a spill,’ the Doctor said.”
Bernard is, as the next paragraph reveals, is Professor Bernard Quatermass, hero of the British television series. The Doctor is Doctor Who, also of a British television series. It should be noted that many people claim that Doctor Who is, in fact, more or less based on the Quatermass serials.

“… out in the sun for about 5,000,000 years too long.”
The third Quatermass film is referred to by two titles, “Quatermass and the Pit” and “5,000,000 Years to Earth”.

“If the question you’re asking is ‘where am I?’, then I’m afraid I can’t answer you,”
Quatermass is in the TARDIS (Time and Relative Dimension in Space), which is dimensionally transcendent. This means it’s bigger inside than out.

“He wore a green coat with question marks emblazoned on it.”
This is the First Doctor, played by William Hartnell.

“‘Grandfather,’ a young girl nearby”
This is Susan, the first companion of the Doctor we ever meet, who refers to him as Grandfather.

“Why have we picked up another pathetic life-form?”
In the unfortunate film “Star Wars, Episode I: the Phantom Menace”, Obi Wan Kenobi says of Anakin Skywalker, the chosen one who shall bring balance to the force (kinda), “Why do I get the feeling we have picked up yet another pathetic lifeform?”

“Yes, yes you did, Bernard. You showed those aliens good, didn’t you?”
It’s worthy of note, just for humor’s sake, that the Doctor is himself what Earth humans would refer to as an “alien”.

“I’m talking about sending you back. Re-substantiation. Making you your old self again. Giving you a second chance to make all the mistakes again.”
This rings quite thematically with the Doctor, who’s powers are never fully revealed during the course of the series. One known power is the power to regenerate, to create a new body when he is killed or too old or the actor wants too much money. Presumably, he has the power to, in a roundabout way, do this to other people.

“That’s exactly what you implied. And don’t call me boy, I’m at least twenty years older than you by the looks of ya.”
The Doctor is very much older than Quatermass.

“One of his closest friends had become a hideous monster after a trip in a rocket of Quatermass’ own design… He’d had to electrocute him to death.”
Recounts the events of “The Quatermass Experiment”, the first serial about the professor.

“The pit is sealed, the Planet People’s god is dead. However, you must prevent further chaos from enveloping humanity. Don’t let the Black Mesa people start a resonance cascade. Don’t let the oceans freeze. Don’t let the Pod People spread. Don’t let anything… too bad happen.”
Let’s go in order:
The pit is sealed: This is the pit from “Quatermass and the Pit”. It has a Martian vehicle in it, amongst other things.
The Planet People’s god is dead: In “The Quatermass Conclusion”, the Planet People are chanting at ancient stone circles and praying to lights in the sky. Quatermass blows the lights up at the end of that story and the beginning of this one.
Don’t let the Black Mesa people start a resonance cascade: This refers to the events of “Half-Life”, a very popular video game. In the LoEG universe, Quatermass presumably had some hand in the design and creation of the Black Mesa facility, most likely with an eye towards the prevention of resonance cascades. Oops.
Don’t let the oceans freeze: This refers to “Cat’s Cradle” by Kurt Vonnegut, a fantastic novel about the end of the world. It’s also a reference to the events of LoEG 55, in which the League must prevent a madman from using Ice-9 to freeze the world’s oceans.
Don’t let the Pod People spread: This is a reference to the events of “The Body Snatchers” by Jack Finney, later made into the wildly popular film “Invasion of the Body Snatchers”. The film has been remade twice, with another in production.

“British Military Intelligence, Division 5. Supposedly controlled by the Masons”.
It is in the world of LoEG.

“Shakespeare’s bald countenance smirks across the ages and the hall to the grizzled visage of one of the men he immortalized in the written word, Duke Prospero.”
In the world of LoEG, it’s accepted that the writers of all the famous books that these characters come from (H.G. Wells, H. Rider Haggard, etc) either knew the person they wrote about or were like the famed novelists of the west, writing stories about famous gunslingers (who then subsequently read them and had a good laugh at the stuff people come up with). Duke Prospero is from “The Tempest”.

“Caliban, Ariel, Christian, and Owe-much. Nearby was a small bust, labeled “Dux Omnium”, their liaison to the throne.”
The first league (Prospero’s Men) has been described in great detail in the New Traveler’s Almanac section of the second volume of LoEG. Caliban and Ariel are his companions from the Tempest, Christian is the traveler from “A Pilgrim’s Progress”, and Owe-much is from “The Floating Island” and serves as ferry-boy for Prospero’s Men. The Duke of Omnium (or at least a relative of his), from the Palliser novels by Anthony Trollop is their connection to the government, their Campion Bond.

“Mr. Gulliver, the Blakeneys, Dr. Syn, Ms. Hill, and Mr. Bumpo stood haughtily, while a bust nearby, marked “K. Münchhausen”, smirked anciently.”
This picture appears in Volume 1, Issue 2 of LoEG. Gulliver is Lemuel Gulliver of “Gulliver’s Travels”, the Blakeneys are from “The Scarlet Pimpernel”, Dr. Syn is from the “Sacrecrow” books, Ms. Hill is Fanny Hill, from the erotic novels, and Mr. Bumpo is Deerslayer from, amongst others, “Last of the Mohicans”. K. Münchhausen is the Baron Münchhausen, notorious tall-tale-teller, who apparently was being honest the whole time.

“consisting of a man ape, a woman in a scarf, a man in a hunting jacket, an Indian with a compass, and… well, some clothes. Floating clothes.”
Mr. Hyde, Ms. Murray, Mr. Quartermain, Captain Nemo, and Mr. Griffin, the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, as seen in Volumes 1 and 2.

“Marked ‘C. Bond’”.
This is Campion Bond, liaison between the government and the League. The significance of the name shall become apparent.

“The first was General Mainwaring”
Captain Mainwaring was the leader of the volunteer defense force in “Dad’s Army”, a classic British sitcom from the 60’s and 70’s. It should be noted that of the adults in the group, he was the only one without combat experience, except for being in France during 1919 (“Somebody had to clear up the mess").

“Agent Palmer was one of MI5’s best”
This is Harry Palmer, of the Harry Palmer series of films starring Michael Caine.

“formerly of Naval Intelligence, a stark middle aged fellow named Fleming”
This is Ian Fleming, author of the James Bond books. He did in fact serve in Naval Intelligence as an assistant to the director. Presumably he was transferred to MI5, where he met Bond, as we shall soon see.

“Know science, no peace. No science, know peace.”
The more common form of this is “Know God, Know Peace. No God, No Peace.”

“Okay, let me ask the other doctor.”
We are witnessing a side-effect of the re-substantiation process, wherein the personality of the old Quatermass, the Quatermass who set off the bomb (a crotchety old man who doesn’t have time for pansies like Bond) usurps the tenuous amalgam he has become after re-substantiation. This leads inevitably to one conclusion: Professor Bernard Quatermass and the grumpy scientist known only as Q (from the 007 series) are one and the same.

“Is he a luddite?”
The luddites were a cult of anti-technology freaks in Britain.

“A new addition to the hall, a black and white photograph.”
This is the League to be chronicled.

“Orbis non sufficit.”
According to “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service”, this is the family motto of the Bonds. Coincidentally (or not) it translates as “The world is not enough”.

-busy busy busy.

And here's the whip.
It is WIP.
Hah hah.

-Hope to have more swords up real soon for yall, real soon.

This is far too much >_< too absorb. for us. i believe i speak for everyone. the models are nice, the rest, and all the text, is simply KILLING me.

:-p

Glamdring > Anduril.

I know. I'm doing this just to make you crazy.

-Expect more sometime soon.

Nooooo!

There will never be a 5 day period without some kind of post! Muahahaha!

-You are all my prisoners of Geekiness! Ah hahhahahahahaha!

CLEAR YOUR CACHE BEFORE VIEWING THIS IMAGE.

More Characters, new groups and locations.

-More soon. Muahahahaha. Ah.

Dude, seriously, this is the most absurd thing I have ever read.

For future reference, everytime someone will say something to the likes of "I'm crazy" I'll link him to this and say he's not even trying.

From looking at that diagram. This looks like some kind of fanfiction of biblical proportions.

Or you could always hit Shift + Refresh to force the browser to redownload the page and all the images on it. :p

... Yeah, I suppose you could.
...
That knowledge would have helped a great deal when uploading this, I think.


I don't half-*** fan fiction. this one just happens to snowball easier.

-I'm thinking next, a Phurba and maybe an airplane of some kind.

A Phurba, one of the items stolen from the British Museum.


This is a Phurba, a mystical dagger in many ancient asian cultures.


Each Phurba has three points to its blade and two spirit faces, one calm and one angry. Each one contains a spirit, usually a contained demon. this is the sleping face.


The Shadow is familliar with Phurbas. They can be "woken" by the power of a psychic like Shadow and Shiwan Khan. This is the angry side.


This is a close-up of the Angry face. Note the gleeeful expression in the eyes and the razor sharp (and buck) teeth.


This is the sleeping side. Good night, fair Phurba.


Detail of the ornate grip. Bumpy, just like ancient people like their artifacts to be.


Detail of the head cap. Also bumpy. Ancient people were funny.

-Love, Jarl.

Information on many leading sceintists of the 1950s:
Professor Bernard Quatermass (Chronicles of Quatermass, 007) is known for being a grumpy old doctor who builds things almost manically. He seeks to bring order and responsibility to the young British Military Intelligence agent James Bond.

Doctor Emmet Brown (Back to the Future) is a dedicated inventor who spends his days trying to outdo himself and others. Recently, he proposed a device vaguely referred to as a "Flux Capacitor". Watch out, this guy's got big things in his... future... Muahahahaha! Sorry.

Doctor Seuss (kinda the same as the author) is a young American linguist who's translations of the Vonyich Manscript, as well as those of the Necronomicon and An Account of Figures on the Angst Road (commonly referred to by its adapted title, And to Think I Saw it on Mulberry Street) are widely considered to be the best of their kind. Unlike other translators, Seuss works exclusively withthe "hands off" documents, the ancient texts written in such strange gobbledegook that only a truly warped mind can undertand them. Seuss is capable of this because he suffered unspeakable traumas early in childhood, resulting in several interesting brain problems. His friend and, ironically, translator for the rest of the world, Teddy Geisel, publishes most of his books for the common populace.

Professor Tolkien (Again, kinda like the real guy) is a man in his early 60's, a man who wrks with the rest of the crazy ancient manuscripts, the ones that are just plain too LONG for anyone else to translate. In addition to the most accurate modern version of Beowulf, Tolkien is currently hard at work on two newly discovered manuscripts. The Red Book of West-March was found at an Englich archeological site, referred to in local legend as the "Resting Place of the Flame of the West". The Red Book was found in a thick chest made of some uncertain metal, along with a number of interesting items including a sword (detailed above), a small dagger of material identical to the chest, a battered crown, and a strange object, a small golden ring. The Red Book appears to detail a group not unlike Britain's Leagues of Gentlemen, whose journey is as yet unspecified, as the translation process is not yet complete. The other document was found in the ruins of a Martian Tripod, presumably an ancient text from their own homeworld. The document, a diary referred to as "The Journal of the Whils", appears to be a 6-part dissertation on morals, politics, and military philosophy. It has not yet been translated.

Doctor Clayton Forrester (War of the Worlds) is a man in his early thirties, a brilliant nuclear physicist and a leading studier of the Martian ruins. It is unclear so far where this knowledge will take him.

Doctor William Wilson Wonka (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) is a young inventor, nuclear physicist, and inventor. He worked extensively in America, including on Project Rainbow, which led to fruition in the so-called Philadelphia Experiment. After the naval disaster, the Invisibility/Teleportaion Engine as well as the project in general were moved to the recently constructed Black Mesa Reseach Facility. Recently, Dr. Wonka has entered the private sector, working as a "chocolateer" for Sunmark Inc.

-Thart's gonna have to do for now.

One of the main characters of the story, a famous scientist from British TV. Also Q, from the 007 series, as we later learn.

One of two heroes in the "Back to the Future" series of Time Travel yarns.


This is the mechanical contrivance that makes Time Travel possible in the B2TF series.


Author of many strange Lewis Carrol-esque tales, including "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" as well as others.


This is a bizarre ancient text of unknown origin which features writing in a completely unknown language, pictures of strange and alien flowers, bizarre figures, and naked women. It's believed that HP Lovecraft based the Necronomicon off it, though in the world of the League we learn it is in fact this book's direct opposite.


The aforementioned fictional book that contains, well, a lot of crazy stuff. How to resurrect ancinet gods, that sort of thing. Polar opposite of the Vonyich Manuscript.


A running gag in the world of LoEG: childrens books about fantastic lands and things are commonly horrific monstrosities and eldritch ancient wastelands when transferred to the League universe. Examples include Wonderland, Oz, Seuss' creatures (a dreadful talking cat stalked Mulberry street further east), Toyland (Frankenstein ends up here somehow), Santa Clause, need I go furhter? I can.


Theodore Geisel is the real name of the real Dr. Seuss.


Author of "Lord of the Rings"


The most common (some would say only) criticism of J.R.R. Tolkien's works.


Something the actual Tolkien actually did.


Name of the fictional book that the Hobbit and Lord of the Rings are taken from. It recounts the tales of pre-historic Britain, specifically the area in and surrounding the Shire.


"Flame of the West" is the name of Anduril, the Shards of Narsil, as wielded by King Aragorn of Gondor, Lord of Men, again from LotR


Possibly Mithril, made by the Elves in the LotR series.


Presumably Sting, Spider's Bane. Wielded by Frodo and Bilbo Baggins during their adventures abroad in LotR.


Possibly Aragorn's Crown. Almost certainly.


Never send a Hobbit to do an Elf's job, apparently. This is almost certainly the One Ring, the Ring of Power, forged by the Lord of the Rings in the fires of Mount Doom, a device so evil it can... do lots of evil stuff. It's wearer turns evil too. That's how you know it's evil. Thought to be destroyed in the Cracks of Mount Doom, but apparently not.


This is the Fellowhsip of the Ring, charged with destroying it. It consisted of Frodo Baggins, a young hobbit and adopted son of the Ring's discoverer, Bilbo Baggins; Aragorn, Son of Arathorn, heir to the throne of Gondor, Lord of Men; Gandalf the Gray (AKA Gandalf the White), powerful mage and general meddler; Samwise Gamgee, gardener and the Joe Perry to Frodo's Steven Tyler; Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck, Frodo's cousins (and they're extremely close in an ambiguous way); Gimli, a wise and cantakerous dwarf; Legolas Greenleaf, effeminate yet deadly elf; and Boromir, son of the Steward of Gondor, and purveyor of such wise knowledge as "One does not simply walk into Mordor".


Although, if the Ring still exists, it may mean that the quest is in some fundamental way different in the LoEG universe.


The Wells Martians (War of the Worlds) were not in fact from Mars, but from some other distant planet in a another galaxy. Apparently, it's far, far away...


Something of an anomoly. The Journal of the Whils is the fictional compendium from which the Star Wars saga has been culled. It is actually a two-part document (The First Part, The Rise of the Empire; and The Second Part, The Adventures of Luke Skywalker), though it's likely that the parts are split into three seperate entries.


Main character of the 1953 version of War of the Worlds.


Possibly because the invasion happened 50 years early.


The mad scientist of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, a book by Roald Dahl, played by Gene Wilder and Johnny Depp in the cinema.


This is exactly the sort of thing Wilder's Wonka would say.


A strange case in American history is that of the Philadelphia Experiment. A Naval Destroyer (USS Eldridge) was turned invisible by means of a mysterious field. Unfortunately, the ship was, in the process, teleported from Philadelphia to Norfolk, Virgina and back again. In even more unfortunate news, the crew suffered strange side effects. Some disappeared during the teleportation (thgouh some sort of half-real dream world), some spontaneously combusted when back on the mainland, some went insane, sone could walk through walls, others turned invisible and were never seen again, were abducted by flying saucers, saw ghosts and strange dream-shapes, and other wild stuff. The experiment supposedly took place in 1945. Of course, there's little evidence that such events ever took place (and that which exists is wrtten in a shaky hand in colored pencil), but if it did, it fits entirely at home with the rest of the League madness (dream worlds, strange monsters, invisibility, magic, science, etc).


A brilliant yet simple deduction. Black Mesa is the location of the famous game "Half-Life", about a scientist named Gordon Freeman who must escape or stop a deadly alien invasion. The game shares many themes with the story of the Philadelphia Experiment.


Chocolateer is Wonka's unnoficial title. For the company name, quothe the Gene Wilder film:



-Actually, the "Inventor, physicist, and inventor" line is something I typed in accidentally in my haste. Strange how things work out like that, eh?

You have more time than humanly possible. Get. A. Girlfriend. She'd be in love with you if you spent this kind of effort on her.

This is rebound material.

-And I really don't spend that much time on this stuff. I mean, I don't wanna say it writes itself, because that would be terrifying to watch (where did this text come from?), but I just sorta lean back, and the connections come out of nowhere.

This is probably the worst counsel I've ever heard.

Unless, of course, you're a heterosexual male.

Trying attachments again...
Here we have Kato and Prospero from the Green Hornet and the Tempest.
For Kato, I used the "Black Mask" version with the original mask.
for Prospero, I looked at the existing pictures and such of other leagues in the texts, noted the recurrence of certain styles and roles, and went with this decidedly unsusual design. Vivi' (FF9) hat, fur trenchcoat, etc.
Rough sketches, you understand.

-Kato's mine, Prospero's Moore's.