Trojan condoms - Discussion Forum - The Massassi Temple Forums Archive

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Trojan condoms

2006-04-18, 5:17 PM #81

Ruthven

Not The Man He Once Was

Posts: 7,638

I remember someone gave me a pack of Durex cos they knew some girl [who shall remain nameless] was desperate enough to sleep with.

The fact the condoms turned out to be "small" sized ones, explained why i was in so much pain.

Ruth's Ego + 1.

[Homicide, you are hereby granted to poke fun of this post]

poke... no pun intended.

Code:

if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}

2006-04-18, 7:51 PM #82

darthslaw

Darth Slaw

Posts: 3,490

Circumference sounds wrong now, knowing the diameter that corresponds. But still, although maybe I'm missing something, wouldn't a 2.2 inch diameter condom just fall off, for the average person?

Or are we talking flattened diameter? (as opposed to the condom being rounded) That would make sense.

May the mass times acceleration be with you.

2006-04-18, 8:02 PM #83

Ruthven

Not The Man He Once Was

Posts: 7,638

flattened diameter sounds better.

Unless you have a fat one.

wow this thread is gonna buuurrrnnn

Code:

if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}

2006-04-18, 8:07 PM #84

sugarless

Sweet 'n' Low

Posts: 3,467

I do think I could have lived a full and happy life without ever contemplating the direction this thread has gone

Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.

2006-04-18, 8:08 PM #85

Ruthven

Not The Man He Once Was

Posts: 7,638

You dont know the minds of men very well do you... :confused:

Code:

if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}

2006-04-18, 8:15 PM #86

dalf

Everyone's favorite alcoholic administrator!

Posts: 8,683

Originally posted by sugarless5:

I do think I could have lived a full and happy life without ever contemplating the direction this thread has gone

Hahahahahaha!

And yeah, let's steer this thread away from it's current direction.

Code to the left of him, code to the right of him, code in front of him compil'd and thundered. Programm'd at with shot and $SHELL. Boldly he typed and well. Into the jaws of C. Into the mouth of PERL. Debug'd the 0x258.

2006-04-18, 8:35 PM #87

Seb

what

Posts: 2,277

Originally posted by Milady:

Wow...who'd of thought our (sort of) innocent dorm room debates on the reasons for naming a condom after the ultimate "insert and conquer" millitary manuever would gain international interest...ah the ironies of life.

this thread doesn't need anymore replies. insert and conquer quenched my taste for hilarious humor.

"NAILFACE" - spe

2006-04-18, 8:46 PM #88

Jep

Jep Bartholomew Francisqué de Minguo El Inigo Montoya Padré the Third

Posts: 10,237

Originally posted by JediGandalf:

Hahahahahaha!

And yeah, let's steer this thread away from it's current direction.

Mine's bigger than yours. Oh! You meant this direction?

Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless

2006-04-18, 9:46 PM #89

-Monoxide-

Banned

Posts: 2,813

Originally posted by Seb:

this thread doesn't need anymore replies. insert and conquer quenched my taste for hilarious humor.

Some sort of insertion will happen, that's for sure.

2006-04-18, 10:11 PM #90

Shintock

Balls of steel.

Posts: 7,146

[http://www.durex.com/US/images/products/sizeguides/size_easyon.gif]

Looks like flattened circumference to me, but even that doesn't seem right. Who the **** cares?

2006-04-18, 10:31 PM #91

Kieran Horn

Got One Anyway

Posts: 3,620

I don't think marketing people tend to think a whole lot about what the name of their product really means because most people won't anyway. Especially when it comes to condoms because who cares where the hell a brand's name came from as long as you get to use them?

Democracy: rule by the stupid

2006-04-18, 10:34 PM #92

Nikumubeki

NIKVMVS-REX-TODOA

Posts: 17,541

I remember reading that some Star Wars tech book would have told that in the Star Wars universe, condoms are actually small forcefields. Or something.

Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum

2006-04-18, 10:43 PM #93

CaveDemon

Banned?

Posts: 1,694

STFU! YOU ALL SUCK

Last edited by mb; today at 10:55 AM.

2006-04-18, 10:44 PM #94

Nikumubeki

NIKVMVS-REX-TODOA

Posts: 17,541

You just want to put on the Sultan.

Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum

2006-04-19, 1:07 AM #95

Gebohq

ISB Kingpin

Posts: 8,352

Originally posted by Ruthven:

You dont know the minds of men very well do you... :confused:

Maybe we should just blame this one on her being blonde...?

The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net

2006-04-19, 7:00 AM #96

Shintock

Balls of steel.

Posts: 7,146

Originally posted by Gebohq:

Maybe we should just blame this one on her being blonde...?

ZING !

2006-04-19, 7:22 AM #97

darthslaw

Darth Slaw

Posts: 3,490

Now that's not very nice :p

May the mass times acceleration be with you.

2006-04-19, 7:27 AM #98

Gebohq

ISB Kingpin

Posts: 8,352

Hey, I'm just sayin' I don't take her to be one not to usually know how a guy thinks, so missing something as obvious as knowing how us guys would reply to a thread like this seems to require her to have slipped into a blonde moment. As she said herself, "I'm easy because I'm blonde."

The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net

2006-04-19, 7:34 AM #99

darthslaw

Darth Slaw

Posts: 3,490

Yeah, I know. Jus' playing witcha

No worries

May the mass times acceleration be with you.

2006-04-19, 7:39 AM #100

Jep

Jep Bartholomew Francisqué de Minguo El Inigo Montoya Padré the Third

Posts: 10,237

We're all blond at some point in our lives.

Hmm, a "MS Paint your blonde moments" thread would be in order. :em321:

Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless

2006-04-19, 7:43 AM #101

Nikumubeki

NIKVMVS-REX-TODOA

Posts: 17,541

I was a blonde in my childhood... then the color disappeared o_o

Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum

2006-04-19, 7:44 AM #102

Gebohq

ISB Kingpin

Posts: 8,352

Originally posted by Jepman:

We're all blond at some point in our lives.

Hmm, a "MS Paint your blonde moments" thread would be in order. :em321:

I think sugarless would soon dominate such a thread with pages of replies...

0=)

The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net

2006-04-19, 7:58 AM #103

Jep

Jep Bartholomew Francisqué de Minguo El Inigo Montoya Padré the Third

Posts: 10,237

Zlawl

Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless

2006-04-19, 8:13 AM #104

Gebohq

ISB Kingpin

Posts: 8,352

I know. I r teh funneh.

The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net

2006-04-19, 8:55 AM #105

sugarless

Sweet 'n' Low

Posts: 3,467

oh, I can kill you

Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.

2006-04-19, 8:56 AM #106

landfish

'splodes

Posts: 4,543

oh snap!

free(jin);
tofu sucks

2006-04-19, 8:56 AM #107

Shintock

Balls of steel.

Posts: 7,146

Strangle him with a Trojan.

2006-04-19, 8:57 AM #108

Jep

Jep Bartholomew Francisqué de Minguo El Inigo Montoya Padré the Third

Posts: 10,237

Please do so publically, it will give me some inspiration for the NeS strips!

Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless

2006-04-19, 8:59 AM #109

sugarless

Sweet 'n' Low

Posts: 3,467

Originally posted by Shintock:

Strangle him with a Trojan.

LOL!

Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.

2006-04-19, 9:04 AM #110

Milady

Registered User

Posts: 99

Yes! ...and the blonde thing comes up yet again. Amazing - she can be so smart but the minute she does something ditzy (and we all know because its usually very public even if its not very frequent) its chalked up to her golden locks...I never have this problem...I'm a brunette

(she and I get into numerous fights about the social pros and cons of being one or the other)

...and about the whole "strangling with a condom" thing...that's way to S&M for my taste...

"I've never seen anyone do an interpretive dance to Mien Kampf "
- MST3K

2006-04-19, 9:05 AM #111

sugarless

Sweet 'n' Low

Posts: 3,467

Milady - I know where you sleep :p

Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.

2006-04-19, 9:08 AM #112

Wolfy

I TYPE LOUD

Posts: 10,623

That's hot.

the idiot is the person who follows the idiot and your not following me your insulting me your following the path of a idiot so that makes you the idiot - LC Tusken

2006-04-19, 9:12 AM #113

Gebohq

ISB Kingpin

Posts: 8,352

Originally posted by Milady:

...and about the whole "strangling with a condom" thing...that's way to S&M for my taste...

I wasn't gonna say anything...

In any case, let me know when you want to murder me... :p

The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net

2006-04-19, 9:17 AM #114

ore_sama

Registered User

Posts: 27

I personally like the idea of strangling with a Trojan.
Just put something in it when you're done, and it'll never be thought of as a murder weapon.

i've died a thousand deaths in a thousand beautiful places that don't exist, because when you reach utopia, there's nowhere else to go..."

Boku wa kimi no okazu

2006-04-19, 9:20 AM #115

Nikumubeki

NIKVMVS-REX-TODOA

Posts: 17,541

o_O

Star Wars: TODOA | DXN - Deus Ex: Nihilum

2006-04-19, 9:29 AM #116

dalf

Everyone's favorite alcoholic administrator!

Posts: 8,683

"In more stranger news tonight. A québec man was found dead in his bedroom strangled and tied up by condoms. Sources say that murderer found the idea from an internet forum. The owner of the forum was unavailable to answer questions. No charges will be filed on the internet forum."

2006-04-19, 9:38 AM #117

Shintock

Balls of steel.

Posts: 7,146

2006-04-19, 9:41 AM #118

Jep

Jep Bartholomew Francisqué de Minguo El Inigo Montoya Padré the Third

Posts: 10,237

Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless

2006-04-19, 9:56 AM #119

Gebohq

ISB Kingpin

Posts: 8,352

It's a good thing I don't live there.

The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net

2006-04-19, 1:08 PM #120

ECHOMAN

"Has it won yet?"

Posts: 17,215

Can you make funny balloon animals with condoms? All I can think of is a baby snake.

SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
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