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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → I can't believe I'm doing this...
123
I can't believe I'm doing this...
2006-05-03, 8:58 PM #41
If you don't intend to do anything with her, definately tell her straight up, pretty much exactly how you told us. You don't feel the same way about her, and you don't want to hurt her feelings by going out then later breaking up.
2006-05-04, 8:55 AM #42
Change of plans -- I'm telling her today. Send her the good vibes please. She'll need them more than me.
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2006-05-04, 11:08 AM #43
:(
2006-05-04, 11:13 AM #44
Psychologists have proven the more time you spend with someone, the more affection you garner for them.

Something to keep in mind.

Edit: At least initially. :p
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2006-05-04, 11:14 AM #45
No, time allows you to truly discover if you like them or not.

If you just dont click, you'll never get on, no matter how long you get to know em.

Hence, why everyone hates their family.
Code:
if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}
2006-05-04, 11:24 AM #46
Originally posted by Ruthven:
No, time allows you to truly discover if you like them or not.

If you just dont click, you'll never get on, no matter how long you get to know em.

Hence, why everyone hates their family.


Wrong.
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2006-05-04, 11:29 AM #47
Ruthy, I think you just hate your family... Most of us like our families... >.>
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

Lassev: I guess there was something captivating in savagery, because I liked it.
2006-05-04, 11:51 AM #48
i hate people like you.
Code:
if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}
2006-05-04, 12:55 PM #49
Originally posted by Avenger:
That's a good point. But even then, if you go out to eat and are really having a good time, and laugh and so on, you can usually tell if there's something there, but I agree that it might be easier or more likely to occur in a different setting.


I actually recommend doing both before making a decision. In a dinner setting you get to pick a persons brain and get at least a sense of their personality (even though they're still putting up a "good" front). In a physical setting, I have found that I become more attracted to a girl that is good (or at least puts forth a determined effort) at some type of outdoor activity. It's also in this type of environment that people tend to drop their "act" and their true personality comes out. You can then compare the two and see how honest the person really is (which is an extreamly important thing in a relationship).

Meh, I understand some things way too much... :gbk:
"The solution is simple."
2006-05-04, 1:03 PM #50
No doubt. Going out more than one time helps get by the awkwardness of the first date too.
Pissed Off?
2006-05-04, 1:04 PM #51
I was inspired.
Magrucko Daines and the Crypt of Crola (2007)
Magrucko Daines and the Dark Youth (2010)
Magrucko Daines and the Vertical City (2016)
2006-05-04, 1:23 PM #52
How am I like being a right-hand man? :confused:

Also, I talked with her today. We went to the mall and walked around, talking about random stuff, and I told her how I felt. She seemed to understand, even agree with me on the matter -- as far as I could tell, I was having more difficulty telling her than she was hearing it. We went to my place afterwards and played SoulCalibur 2 (I tried to get her to watch Firefly, but we didn't get past the first five minutes :(). So... I think all went well.
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2006-05-04, 1:25 PM #53
Then you had rough sex?
Magrucko Daines and the Crypt of Crola (2007)
Magrucko Daines and the Dark Youth (2010)
Magrucko Daines and the Vertical City (2016)
2006-05-04, 1:30 PM #54
No. -_-
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2006-05-04, 1:32 PM #55
Not even get a quick breast fondle?
Magrucko Daines and the Crypt of Crola (2007)
Magrucko Daines and the Dark Youth (2010)
Magrucko Daines and the Vertical City (2016)
2006-05-04, 1:32 PM #56
Originally posted by Gebohq:
No. -_-


"That is why you fail" - Yoda
The tips at the end of shoelaces are called "aglets". Their true purpose is sinister.
2006-05-04, 1:35 PM #57
I think you all are failing to see the point of this thread... -_-
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2006-05-04, 1:39 PM #58
Hey I'm tall and have spikey hair too. Maybe she'll like me.

:(
2006-05-04, 1:40 PM #59
Don't be silly! :rolleyes:
Magrucko Daines and the Crypt of Crola (2007)
Magrucko Daines and the Dark Youth (2010)
Magrucko Daines and the Vertical City (2016)
2006-05-04, 1:40 PM #60
Originally posted by Gebohq:
I think you all are failing to see the point of this thread... -_-


This is the internet. Girls = sex.

Anyway, best of luck with her. If nothing else, you've gained a friend.
2006-05-04, 3:18 PM #61
Originally posted by Gebohq:
How am I like being a right-hand man? :confused:

You obviously missed the previous incarnation of his signature!

Sounds like the best possible outcome for the situation was achieved, Geb.
2006-05-04, 3:33 PM #62
I obviously did miss his last incarnation of his signature.

And yes, I'd say everything turned out pretty well. I'm fairly certain I succeeded in the biggest goal I wanted to accomplish -- good communication. I explained how I felt, and told her that she could talk to me about whatever, because I know it's really hard to talk to someone when they don't seem to want to talk to you, and it leaves you with question and doubt and all sorts of things that just aren't good for any sort of relationship, friends or otherwise.
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2006-05-04, 3:45 PM #63
How can you know you cannot love her if you don't keep an open mind and respect a proposal? If there has not been a proposal, then you would be wrong to think you are obligated to act: a crush does not demand action. Furthermore, dating, as they call it, does not necessitate physical contact. If there is one dilema, it follows from the fact that you are male, which puts you in a peculiar position, as only males and not females are expected to put forth proposals. I once learned I was admired by a female and made a proposal, leading to a stagnant and distanced relationship. Because there was never feeling in it, no damage was done. Damage can only be done when false feelings are expressed. Make a proposal, if only to learn of her and allow for her to learn of you, in an honest fashion devoid of lust.
2006-05-04, 3:48 PM #64
Blast, I'm too late. No matter. For further advice regarding the topic of love, read Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice as to learn of Fitzwilliam Darcy, a capital fellow worthy of emulation.
2006-05-04, 3:57 PM #65
Personally, I think he made the right choice. Really...if there's no spark, why enter a relationship? It just leads to...erm...bad. (My vocabulary is on summer break early.) I had a situtation like this with a friend. He liked me and told me he did. I knew there wasn't a spark there, but I went on a date. The whole thing was just...bad. We're still friends (technically) but any time we hang out or talk, he tells me I'm horrible for not giving him more of a chance and for having unrealistic expectations...

Also...girls can sometimes take "just a date" as being in a relationship. It's best to avoid it all.

p.s. I always thought Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy had a bit of a spark there in the beginning.
"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."
2006-05-04, 3:57 PM #66
No, I want to give Darcy a good whack upside the head with the giant stick he has shoved up his arse
Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.
2006-05-04, 3:58 PM #67
I always liked Darcy. :(
"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."
2006-05-04, 4:00 PM #68
most people I know do, and the way he's portrayed in the newer movie is more likeable than in the old movie and the book, but I still can't really like him as a character for the most part.
Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.
2006-05-04, 4:05 PM #69
My apologies for expounding upon the unrelated topic of Mr. Darcy, but: the movie does not do Austin justice, only potraying asthetics and lacking the delightful complexity of the original text (but this is nothing new in regard to movies derived from literature).
2006-05-04, 4:12 PM #70
I just can't say that P&P is Austen's best. Sense and Sensibility has better characters I think, but of course that's just me. Most people love Darcy, so don't go by what I say, but it's hard for me to find redeeming qualities until the end, which means you have to suffer through him being a supreme, though complex, *** for the majority of the book.

And I tihnk you were right, Geb.
Fincham: Where are you going?
Me: I have no idea
Fincham: I meant where are you sitting. This wasn't an existential question.
2006-05-04, 4:17 PM #71
I think it's ridiculous to only enter a relationship if you have a spark. Think about how many people you've had a crush on over the course of your life. Now calculate the odds that one of those crushes will be mutual. Depending on the average crush frequency, I would peg it as far less than 1% of the time.

Then there are other kinds of sparks - less infatuatory. More like 'meh - I'd hit that.' This is more what you should base your willingness to date on - not that topmost category. Besides, once you actually get to know someone, it's possible that you will really grow fond of them (and no sooner).
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2006-05-04, 4:33 PM #72
Quote:
I think it's ridiculous to only enter a relationship if you have a spark.

I concur.
2006-05-04, 4:35 PM #73
Well, from my experience, the person you'll end up being really in love with will not be the person you have (/had) a crush on. And you can only see if you're really fit for each other after you're already *in* a relationship, I believe.

Other than that, there's always random sex. The advantage of not being in love. Meh. But, you know. Just do whatever feels natural.

EDIT: Now playing in WinAmp: Joe Satriani - What Breaks A Heart.
幻術
2006-05-04, 4:37 PM #74
On the contrary, I think internet pornography, devoid of disease, sufficiantly fills the niche for lust, leaving to real life only the desire to love.
2006-05-04, 4:41 PM #75
Em. No.

Don't know about you, but to me sex is a little bit more than what you can do with your right hand. If you catch my drift.
幻術
2006-05-04, 4:41 PM #76
Try using your left. It's a doozie!
2006-05-04, 4:42 PM #77
Originally posted by Ruthven:
i hate people like you.

I'm going to go cut myself.
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

Lassev: I guess there was something captivating in savagery, because I liked it.
2006-05-04, 4:52 PM #78
Originally posted by Koobie:
Em. No.

Don't know about you, but to me sex is a little bit more than what you can do with your right hand. If you catch my drift.


Forgive the ignorance of those of us uninitiated, but perhaps only imagination is needed to sustain novelty.
2006-05-04, 5:14 PM #79
just be **** buddies, you don't need a 'spark' for that just some alchohol
"Nulla tenaci invia est via"
2006-05-04, 5:15 PM #80
z@n always has the best advice...
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

Lassev: I guess there was something captivating in savagery, because I liked it.
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