So my wife and I have been doing way too many cryptic crosswords lately...and this thread is the result.

Dream up some cryptic clues for a Massassi crossword...if one existed. I'll kick off with some easy ones:

Eek! I’m backwards and stretched around twin donkeys! (<-- if you can't get this one, you really suck )

To worship this deity, some risked rising waters

The first couple ascended very eagerly, but faced a devil by any other name

SavageX lost his head and it's landed in the pork! What could you eat that with now?!

Bane of a confused russian intelligence, but without them we're sitting in the dark

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

Spork!

I can't get the rest. :/

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Space Colony Inc. Phoenix Suburban City Dereliction

Massassi

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"Windows [n.]
A thirty-two bit extension and GUI shell to a sixteen bit patch to an eight bit operating system originally coded for a four bit microprocessor and sold by a two-bit company that can't stand one bit of competition."

And I think the last one is GBK.

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"Windows [n.]
A thirty-two bit extension and GUI shell to a sixteen bit patch to an eight bit operating system originally coded for a four bit microprocessor and sold by a two-bit company that can't stand one bit of competition."

Spork and Massassi are correct. GBK is not.

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Baby Mama's Drama

Cogs?

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"Windows [n.]
A thirty-two bit extension and GUI shell to a sixteen bit patch to an eight bit operating system originally coded for a four bit microprocessor and sold by a two-bit company that can't stand one bit of competition."

No.

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Baby Mama's Drama

Brian

and

The Massassi Brute Squad?

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IMPORTANT NOTICE PLEASE READ

Employees dying on the job are faling to fall down. THIS PRACTICE MUST STOP as it becmes impossible to distinguish between death and the natural movement of he staf.

Any employee found dead in an upright position will be dropped from the payroll.

[This message has been edited by Elana14 (edited August 03, 2004).]

No and no.

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Baby Mama's Drama

Last one: Windows?

To Worship this deity, some risked rising waters: Flooding?

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"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net

Windows = yes

Other one = no

Clue: The two that haven't been got yet are both member names.

NEW ONES:

A great mind with scrambled A.I. shall light the way

They began to arrive carrying children, at the Massassi refugee center!

[This message has been edited by Jaiph (edited August 03, 2004).]

Me?

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Check out the following stories over at the Interactive Story Board:
The Never-ending Story Thread or visit the new webcomic version!
The Vision Cycle series
Featured Story: Scions of Light

Brian.

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Drugs & Stupidity, Tons of it.

I remember I made a cryptic crossword and posted it here AGES ago...

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tristan is the best friend of the jedi

"I am the signature virus! Copy me into your signature so that I can take over the world! Moohahahee!"

Yay, you get the double choc cookie

Here's some solutions and info for anyone still confused about the concept:

Eek! I’m backwards and stretched around twin donkeys!

So first, reverse I'm to Mi as the clue hints. When something is 'stretched out around' like that it means you need to stick something inbetween Mi. In this instance 'twin donkeys' which translates to 2 x *** ...leading to Massassi

SavageX lost his head and it's landed in the pork! What could you eat that with now?!

When you see 'head' or something similar it may mean the first letter(s) of a word....and conversely words like end or bottom may mean the last letter(s) of a word. So SavageX lost his head (S) and it landed in the pork...which means add the 'S' to 'pork' = Spork! The last bit is just a logical clue to help.

Bane of a confused russian intelligence, but without them we're sitting in the dark

Ok so russian intelligence = KGB (well it could mean the new one, but noone cares about that one it's not cool). Confused KGB means things need to be re-arranged = GBK...and we all know what his 'bane' is and the logical clue in the second half narrows down the few possibilites to....Windows

A great mind with scrambled A.I. shall light the way

I was surprised you got this one so fast Great mind = brain. Scrambled A.I. means re-arrange the 'a' and 'i' and the last bit is just a logical clue to assist.

[This message has been edited by Jaiph (edited August 03, 2004).]

Well, here are a few guesses based on things to do with water, but they're probably wrong:

Archimedes (for the Archimedes screw)
Iceman (does anyone else even remember him?)

I dunno. Too cryptic.

I should have got the GBK one. Dammit!

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Snail racing: (500 posts per line)

--------@%

The Massassi JO/JA Single Player contest info

Nope, hint: when you see words like 'partial' or 'partly' or any other word similar in meaning, it may mean a word is hidden in the upcoming text.

...and a hint for one of the other ones noone has gotten yet: sometimes a word clues you in that you should take note of the first letters (or maybe even last letters) in an upcoming string of words. Be aware that things like commas and fullstops, etc tend to end a wordgame.

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

The first couple ascended very eagerly, but faced a devil by any other name

Avenger?

Nope, but let's just say you are very close to the answer

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

Kedri?

Answer based on finding letters in the clue rather than having any idea on why it's this answer.

Yup, bingo 'some' is just like 'partial', so if you see it it often means there is a word hidden ahead. The deity bit is just a general hint.

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

The first couple ascended very eagerly, but faced a devil by any other name

CaveDemon

Got it, grats

Only one left... disappointed no-one else has tried their hand at making one though

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

yeah ... by first couple I thought you meant Adam and eve hence Avenger ... but the you was a give away ...

Ok here's one ...

A form of expressionism between a disc jockey though before harden without its arden.

[This message has been edited by CavEmaN (edited August 03, 2004).]

Darth J!

That was a good one, took me a while

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

TACC?

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Drugs & Stupidity, Tons of it.

Winner! You get the special Gonk shaped cookie

500 Romans crowded into Noah's sanctuary, the first three and the last three from foreign places

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

[This message has been edited by Jaiph (edited August 03, 2004).]

My guess is dark forces but thats just based on the second half of the clue... no idea really... these are amusing, heh.

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Drugs & Stupidity, Tons of it.

Yup

500 Romans (D) crowded into Noah's sanctuary (Ark), the first three and the last three from (for)eign pla(ces)



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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

e;f,b



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http://www.jedilegacy.net/gonk/

[This message has been edited by Gonk (edited August 03, 2004).]

With no more sick to pillage, Gandalf left his profession for a bachelor's life

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

JediGandalf

Negative.

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

pagewizard!

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/end boob rant

Direct hit!

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Cantina Cloud | BCF | The Massassian 1, 2 & 3 | Gonk WoW Petition <- SIGN!
Corrupting the kiddies since '97

I just got the first half of the clue, clever! gandalf and bachelor were enough to get the answer

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/end boob rant

Heres another... (also to help relieve Jeff from mental breakdown).

object:

A meeting between a talking horse and an auditor over missing mister australian dollars' round room lacking

hint: something you see on the front page of massassi. use your logic ... its pretty simple.



[This message has been edited by CavEmaN (edited August 03, 2004).]

O_o I must be really retarded...i get none of these...

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Why Did the Chicken Cross The Road?

>>The Bible's Answer:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

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nil nip nada zip zero naught lip zil