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ForumsDiscussion Forum → How do you wipe your Fanny? Stand or Sit?
123
How do you wipe your Fanny? Stand or Sit?
2010-03-02, 7:56 AM #41
Originally posted by KOP_AoEJedi:
I don't even know how people sit and do it. I'm not even fat and my ass is too big to get a hand under there without doing some serious leaning. I'm a stander.


Either your badonkadonk is bodacious or your toilet seat is tiny..
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2010-03-02, 7:58 AM #42
The answer to this entire thread should be:
[http://akbrookmire.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/iace_1970_bidet.jpg]
Quote Originally Posted by FastGamerr
"hurr hairy guy said my backhair looks dumb hurr hairy guy smash"
2010-03-02, 11:03 AM #43
Amazing we got this far without a bidet reference
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2010-03-02, 11:40 AM #44
I never realized anyone stood while doing that.

Wow.
Though my butt cheeks get spread apart more when I'm sitting on the can, if I stand and try to wipe I'm apt to get poo all over my hands trying to wipe. Or at least I would imagine so, I've never tried it. I'll try it next time I poop and see how it goes. I don't imagine I'll like it though. Just seems awkward.

Besides, most public bathroom have TP dispensers aimed kinda low, so you know, you can get access to it while SITTING.
2010-03-02, 11:41 AM #45
Originally posted by Deadman:
Amazing we got this far without a bidet reference


that's a bidet? wtf

That's just a whack sink. Wheres it flush? Why does it squirt from the bottom? it would be covered in poo, squirting liquid poo all over you. uhg
2010-03-02, 12:14 PM #46
You don't poop in a bidet. You go to the bathroom in the toilet, and then use the bidet to clean you.
-=I'm the wang of this here site, and it's HUGE! So just imagine how big I am.=-
1337Yectiwan
The OSC Empire
10 of 14 -- 27 Lives On
2010-03-02, 12:19 PM #47
ahhghhh
2010-03-02, 1:09 PM #48
My dad has one of those expensive toilets that doubles as a toilet/bidet... you poop, flush, as it flushes its sprays you off.... oh yeah, and it has a heated seat.

He's wierd.
Quote Originally Posted by FastGamerr
"hurr hairy guy said my backhair looks dumb hurr hairy guy smash"
2010-03-02, 1:27 PM #49
[http://img.youtube.com/vi/crfGXmxJ1vM/0.jpg]
2010-03-02, 1:29 PM #50
I don't understand how sitting is logistically possible, even for someone as skinny as me.
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2010-03-02, 1:41 PM #51
Crap... I just pooed and forgot to try wiping while standing up.

No pun intended.
2010-03-02, 1:42 PM #52
Originally posted by Mort-Hog:
So tempted to post tubgirl...

[http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/1/1a/Howtubgirlworks.jpg]
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2010-03-02, 1:59 PM #53
Originally posted by KOP_AoEJedi:
My dad has one of those expensive toilets that doubles as a toilet/bidet... you poop, flush, as it flushes its sprays you off.... oh yeah, and it has a heated seat.

He's wierd.


The heated seat part would be awesome.
2010-03-02, 2:21 PM #54
Originally posted by Freelancer:
I don't understand how sitting is logistically possible, even for someone as skinny as me.


How is it not? You're sitting, your ass cheeks are apart and ready for easy wipeage.
Standing makes no sense at all to me.
Do you crap, stand up and... what? raise the toilet seat, wipe and drop the paper down? Do you have to lean over so your ass is apart (which would be messy) or do you just force it in there (which would be very messy)
I seriously don't get it, and what with all paper being aimed at sitting height and everything... how does it even occur to someone to try it standing up?
It sounds so uncomfortable and messy.
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2010-03-02, 2:27 PM #55
Originally posted by Alan:
[http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/1/1a/Howtubgirlworks.jpg]


I lol'd
-=I'm the wang of this here site, and it's HUGE! So just imagine how big I am.=-
1337Yectiwan
The OSC Empire
10 of 14 -- 27 Lives On
2010-03-02, 4:04 PM #56
Originally posted by Cool Matty:
The heated seat part would be awesome.


Maybe not...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/6559373.stm
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. " - Bertrand Russell
The Triumph of Stupidity in Mortals and Others 1931-1935
2010-03-02, 4:09 PM #57
The only thing more awesome than a heated toilet is a toilet catching fire.
If you think the waiters are rude, you should see the manager.
2010-03-02, 4:17 PM #58
Surely if it caught wire while you were using it, it wouldn't be that way for long.
nope.
2010-03-02, 5:23 PM #59
Lets all make videos of ourselves wiping and post them here!
2010-03-02, 5:24 PM #60
Also, imagine getting a blumpkin and then having her wipe yer ass for ya too!
(all while sitting down)
2010-03-02, 5:54 PM #61
Originally posted by Squirrel King:
Also, imagine getting a blumpkin and then having her wipe yer ass for ya too!
(all while sitting down)


Even kings envy such luxury.
:master::master::master:
2010-03-02, 7:06 PM #62
How can you sit and wipe?

I've tried it and it's impossible! And I'm a very skinny guy...

Also... fanny... wtf?
ORJ / My Level: ORJ Temple Tournament I
2010-03-02, 7:13 PM #63
Reach between not around.
2010-03-02, 8:01 PM #64
ew, i'd be afraid of getting poo on my testicles.
My girlfriend paid a lot of money for that tv; I want to watch ALL OF IT. - JM
2010-03-02, 9:16 PM #65
I eat some TP after every meal. Wipes itself.
Little angel go away
Come again some other day
Devil has my ear today
I'll never hear a word you say
2010-03-02, 9:17 PM #66
I eat only foods high in fiber. And I don't drink water, ever. Wipes itself.
2010-03-02, 9:27 PM #67
Originally posted by saberopus:
I eat only foods high in fiber. And I don't drink water, ever. Wipes itself.


That's not "Wipes itself". That's pooping sticks, man.
Little angel go away
Come again some other day
Devil has my ear today
I'll never hear a word you say
2010-03-02, 9:51 PM #68
umm, standing wipe. I don't get the sitting wipe. In fact, I read this thread, and went to go take a poo to test out the sitting wipe... and I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was afraid I'd dip my knuckles in the poo water. Also, I usually wipe then take a visual of the paper, and keep wiping till I can't see poo, to make sure I got it all, and there's really no easy way to pull the paper back out to check it out. How do you know if you got it all? And, reaching in between your legs? How are you not worried about dribbling pee on your wrist? (or at the least rubbing your wrist on your balls)?
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

Lassev: I guess there was something captivating in savagery, because I liked it.
2010-03-02, 9:55 PM #69
God knows if your wrist touched your balls you'd be screwed.

I guess that old joke where the Marine says to the Seaman "in the marines they teach us not to piss on our hands" must be true to some degree.
>>untie shoes
2010-03-02, 10:14 PM #70
I'm right handed, so I lean on my left cheek and wipe from behind/to the side ish.
2010-03-03, 1:46 AM #71
That's really great.
COUCHMAN IS BACK BABY
2010-03-03, 2:04 AM #72
Wow, see, at most, I was expecting like, a couple of people joke voting stand.
But the poles are split right down the middle
They're really cheek to cheek
Anus
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2010-03-03, 2:39 AM #73
I get my servant to do it
2010-03-03, 4:13 AM #74
Sit at front of seat, lean slightly forwards, hand behind you and under, wipe. There is plenty of space, and I have a fat arse.
Detty. Professional Expert.
Flickr Twitter
2010-03-03, 4:17 AM #75
I don't understand how it's physically comfortable to stand and wipe. Sitting and reaching around the side is a lot easier, and while I am not fat or chubby at all, I am not a hugely skinny guy either and I have absolutely zero problems reaching around the side to wipe front to back.....Never have I had an issue in any sized bathroom.
2010-03-03, 4:20 AM #76
People crapping standing up just wish mom and dad were doing it for them again.
Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless
2010-03-03, 5:03 AM #77
I'm surprised no one said "three seashells" yet
2010-03-03, 5:22 AM #78
I'm not going to google that so instead I ask: why would anyone say three seashells?
You can't judge a book by it's file size
2010-03-03, 5:30 AM #79
Originally posted by Temperamental:
I don't understand how it's physically comfortable to stand and wipe. Sitting and reaching around the side is a lot easier, and while I am not fat or chubby at all, I am not a hugely skinny guy either and I have absolutely zero problems reaching around the side to wipe front to back.....Never have I had an issue in any sized bathroom.


Try it, it's easier. Also, like Sarn said, it's easier to check the paper to see what's come off.
ORJ / My Level: ORJ Temple Tournament I
2010-03-03, 5:50 AM #80
How is it possibly difficult to check the paper if you're sitting down?
Detty. Professional Expert.
Flickr Twitter
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