haters stay home! i'm gonna guzzle that fan-focused devotion

use it to generate some capital c content for my fan account on instagram

I have so much consumer surplus right now

Delightful how you can strip away the fluff to leave "suffers, but concludes". God rest ye, Star Wars.

Ohh I see, this movie wasn't made and released specifically for the 10th anniversary of TODOA.

Boh.

Hey hey hey, be careful. You don't want to associate yourself with this movie.

For free.

hey @disney execs, in exchange for 1/4 of your christmas bonus I'm willing to let you tell your shareholders it was all my fault. hmu.

why did you not capitalize content

i long-form capitalized it

Boh

Saw it this morning.

Eh.

I don't think I can explain why or even if I understand why I had any shred of optimism for this "final" movie. I guess it was a naive hope that in an effort to recover from the awful film that preceded it, they would produce such a terrific product that would have no possibility of not being flawed but still do wonderful with what they had left. And I'm sure they tried but this whole damn trilogy was doomed from the start. The Star Wars Sequel Trilogy is Disney's biggest failure and it was all completely avoidable.

pic related, it's wookie06 in the pic

Need mouse ears on the Star Wars monolith but other than that, pretty good.

Let me be perfectly honest on another thing. Even though I know this latest movie is pretty bad, I still WANT to go see it. I want to see it on the big screen with overpriced concessions and long periods of pain in my bladder. I'm trying to remain strong though. I must wait until I see it on used bluray (since Netflix isn't an option).

You know, had the second movie been good I really could have forgiven TFA. Most of my criticism with that film is pretty minor compared to what they followed it up with. Not having a plan for a cohesive trilogy is unforgiveable, given they knew that's what they were making. You know, if you think about it, the first two trilogies really start with a stand alone film and then the middle film picks up later and works with the last film. Even though I really don't like TLJ, perhaps they would have been better off to embrace it and bring that film's story arcs to a conclusion rather than try to correct and retcon it. That probably would have worked better but it's all really academic now, isn't it?

so basically you're judging a movie you haven't seen yet?

i just saw it...

is it the best SW movie? no
is it the best of the sequel trilogy? no
is it better than TLJ? very much so

remember how TLJ had a go nowhere side story that literally bogged down the whole movie? yeah there is none of that

is there fan service stuff tossed in? most certainly

does it backpedal a bit on some of the stupid **** from the last one? a little

does a more grown up baby yoda show up and force choke the absolute **** out of palpatine saving the day? mando jetpacks in and airdrops the green kid

Yeah, sure, I guess.

It's been a terrible trilogy and there really is no excuse for it. Koobie could have written a better one.

I watched it

it was alright

I liked it pretty well for what it was. More than anything, this sequel trilogy just feels like B-grade fan-fiction, and I think if you watch it through that lens, it's far more tolerable. I don't even think that's a ridiculous thing to say. It's no different than the 100 different story arcs for all the super hero comics and movies. They all have their own interpretations of things, and the only "canon" bits are specific parts of each hero's story and surroundings. It doesn't excuse The Last Jedi for just actually being a bad movie, but it certainly helps when you look at this sequel trilogy as a whole.

The bits with Palpatine in this movie felt incredibly rushed, some of the "big reveals" were beyond obvious ahead of time, but it more or less delivered on what it had to do. It didn't feel like a Michael Bay film. It didn't even really feel like a stereotypical JJ Abrams film. If anything, it felt like Star Wars, looked like Star Wars, but with modern blockbuster film pacing. There were some really cool shots and cinematography, undoubtedly the most complex of any of the Star Wars movies thus far, and I thoroughly enjoyed the score. I thought John Williams even mailed it in a bit on The Last Jedi, but he certainly tied everything up with a nice bow for Skywalker.

I have additional thoughts, but they're all spoiler-worthy, so if you want to read, do so at your own risk.

1. Snoke being a experiment by Palpy felt completely half-assed. I think JJ had no idea where to go with that after the events of TLJ, so had to concoct something that felt like "no rly im the big bad behind all this" with Palp. There's so many parts of this that doesn't make sense, but it's easy to ignore because Snoke was worthless anyway.

2. Palpy already being "back" was dumb. I think the only reason they did that was simply because of timing. It really felt like the first half of this film should have just been its own movie, replacing TLJ entirely. Would have given them more time to fully bake out the reasons behind everything that's happening. I'm sure this will be expanded in all the new official canon comics and books and such, but meh.

3. Rey being the granddaughter of Palpatine was pretty anticlimactic, and still begs a lot of questions. Less so about whoever Palpy shagged or force-inseminated, but moreso about who his child was? Why would that person have not actually been the rightful successor, instead of just a normal person that then protected their daughter..? That whole thing just felt strange, but maybe I missed a key detail there. That whole sequence was pretty fast-paced.

4. Leia's integration into the movie was actually really well done. I think that was maybe the most surprising thing to me, because going into the movie I felt like every scene with her was probably going to feel forced and out of context. They did a great job utilizing what she had previously recorded and then building around that, up until her actual death scene, which felt a little weird and forced. I'm sure that was just a limitation of what they were able to use, though.

5. Han coming back was a surprise, but felt really weird. I get that it was a "vision" and not really a Han force ghost, and in fact my guess is that Leia was actually supposed to be the one to do this in the original story arc, ultimately causing her death similar to Luke in TLJ, but I guess it still kind of worked.

6. Was really expecting the end battle to include force ghosts of Anikan, Yoda, Obi-Wan, Luke, etc as a final aid to Rey defeating the Emperor. The voices were a cheap and inexpensive way for them to do that, but seemed odd to not go all-in there. I suppose an in-universe explanation might be that a force ghost can only be seen if you've actually interacted with that person, because I'm pretty sure we've never seen otherwise, but that feels like an excuse for actors' schedules not lining up, or just the cost to include them in general.

7. The end scene of Rey saying she was a "Skywalker" felt odd. The whole movie was about healing and the whole theme for Rey the entire trilogy was about accepting who she was. She was a scavenger, an orphan, and now a Palpatine. Her now taking the Skywalker surname kind of goes against that theme.

The sequels do feel like fan fiction. Odd that they have that quality, which I can't really describe, and that the prequels, which are worse movies and more amateurish movies, don't. Maybe the fan fiction quality is the derivativeness of them. Or maybe it's that the filmmakers who made them are actually fans.

Or maybe George Lucas’s problem is that he wasn’t good enough technically to tell the good story he wanted to tell, and the base amateurs who made the new trilogy have access to all of the technical talent and money in the world but have no idea how to effectively use any of it.

The only fanfic I ever read that was tolerable was My Immortal, and that's only because it's actually just the best parody of fanfic ever written.

Speaking of, I played a tabletop with my RPG friends called "Blades in the Dark". I wrote a character named Dementia, who wore a full length black cape, fingerless gloves.. and wore about 50 knives. Tried to one up every character on toughness.. but in a roleplayed way, so I'd try to make him realistic when he inevitable failed to intimidate anyone. Constantly pissed off NPCs when he'd say **** like "alive or dead? I prefer DEAD".

The GM loved it. He thought it was the most hilarious character ever seen. Everyone else in my party HATED it. We lasted two sessions before they made me reroll characters.

There's no point to this story other than I'm proud of myself for successfully writing the most insufferable RPG party member ever.

That was close to how I was thinking of it. Lucas thought himself an auteur-blockbuster director akin to Spielberg despite not having a shred of his talent. He had ambition and confidence without even being aware that he lacked the capacity to execute. Abrams and RJ are movie nerds whose aesthetic sensibilities were shaped by imitating the external features of Spielberg movies (or the original Star Wars, or 80s blockbusters generally) without being able to capture the animating spirit that made them so fresh to begin with (and makes them a joy to watch even after all these years and after seeing them countless times).

I don't think that was contradictory. I think it made a lot of sense, actually. (I added a little bit with my edit.) She does accept who she is by the end of the movie. Throughout the trilogy, her past is a burden to her. In TFA, it keeps her on Jakku as she waits for her parents to return. In this movie, when she discovers that she's Palpatine's granddaughter, and she realizes it's the source of her power, she's terrified by the implications, because it might mean her destiny is to be a Sith. By the end of the movie, she recognizes that who she is isn't fatalistically determined by her ancestry, but that she's free to live as she chooses, unencumbered by her past. She adopts the Skywalker name because it's how she can most authentically be herself.

I really wish Kylo had lived--the redemption & immediate death felt too much like a Xerox of Vader and it was imo a bummer for the ENTIRE Skywalker/Solo family to be dead by the end of the trilogy, especially with the last two movies seeing basically the entire republic & resistance slaughtered. This trilogy had a whole lot more mass murders than the OT/Prequels huh?

The rest of the movie I could take or leave-- the complete abandonment of the romance between Finn and Rose was pretty hilarious

Also since Rey adopted herself into the Skywalker family, does that mean she kissed her brother? It's like poetry. It rhymes

Royal Tenenbaum’s style!

hi i'm here now - I liked it.

They should have killed Chewbaca - revealing he was alive took away any stakes regarding which way Rey would end up.

LOL @ everyone that said "but Rey CANT be a nobody"

I just watched it. I enjoyed it a lot. Not the story I was expecting. For sure there are issues but this one is my favorite of the latest trilogy.

I just made an amusing discovery--the Star Wars wiki has this elaborate overwrought retcon to justify the scene in The Force Awakens when they can somehow see "the republic" getting blown up in the sky

THis is classic star war

I guess Koobie finally found that Star Wars science thing to write about.

Hah, what a beautiful effort.

Just saw it. Felt like a checklist of Star Wars wrongs that the author felt like had to be righted, especially from TLJ.

WTF, JJ wasn't the one expected to subvert our expectations. My ****ing expectations on who would subvert my expectations have been subverted.

blockbuster storytelling is hell in 2019

The original trilogy was a series of B-movies at best.

I really don't know what y'all were expecting.

We were expecting what we got, a B Minus caliber movie. What we hoped for (with the ST in general) was some B Plus caliber movies.

>:(

Still surprising to me that a trilogy was made (in 6 years) with no real over-arching plan in the beginning. What a **** show.

I don't believe that. I mean I know it's true but it's also utterly incompetent. Disney may be many things but I'd never expected incompetence.

I was quite disappointed with the visuals at the end. The set design was far too sparse. It felt less like an intentional choice, and more like they just ran out of time.

I also hate the overuse of heavy handed blue filters. Yes, blue and orange are complementary. That isn't the last word on the use of color in film. It sucks.

Also, The fleets at the end were boring and looked stupid. Yes, there's a whole lot of ships, but it doesn't feel like a compelling engagement. It was just a big mess. Rouge One has been by far the best at this, and it's a real shame that they didn't take a page from that book.

On positive Star Wars news The Mandalorian season seemed to have done unexpectedly well. I say "unexpectedly" because it seems Disney may not have been expecting much from it demonstrated by missing an entire holiday season of tie in merchandise. Baby Yoda could have been 2019s Cabbage Patch doll. I liked the "fan service" (I despise that term) as well as the new things they chose to do. The humor was well done. It occasionally felt a little low budget but to me that added to the charm. I like that the episodes were relatively short and easily digestible.

When I first heard about Disney+ I was like, screw them. Then I found out it was like $7/month and I was like, screw them now I have to get it. Then with Marvel and Star Wars stuff they pissed me off and I was like, screw them. Now that I've viewed The Mandalorian I'm moving back towards compromising my principles and subscribing. Screw them!

Yeah, wtf, why aren't there baby yoda things everywhere? Not that I mind really but it just seems like a huge opportunity for $$ wasted.