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ForumsInteractive Story Board → Sith Hell (PLEASE dont go and screw up this story...)
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Sith Hell (PLEASE dont go and screw up this story...)
1999-10-15, 8:32 PM #1
Sith Hell (PLEASE dont go and screw up this story... If people write seriously im gonna make a level based on it. The general idea is kind of a cross between the darkside and hell, the ultimate evil. I Will ask one more time, PLEASE dont go and screw this up, if i like how it turns out, it will become the plot for the level. One more thing, if this story does start going good, and someone comes along and decides to f@#k it up, ignore thier post as if they never posted. One last thing, ONLY i can conclude this story. Now without further adu...[Err, i think thats the right word...})


Sith hell.

There is a sith temple that exists, that is so dark, the light side cannot exist there. Until now, this has been unknown.. But until now, it was of no concern, to the SW galaxy we know, but so much sith power has built up that it has literally torn a hole in the dimention.....

Somewere on Corsacuant....
All the jedi are practicly knocked out with a sense of the biggest disturbance in the force... A meeting is called of the newly re-forming jedi council.

Luke: "Something has gone terribly wrong...."
Mara: "We all sensed it..."
Kyle: "What are we going to do?"
(There are others there too but im focusing on these three, as the whole story will.)
Luke: "We have to do something.... We know were it is, we have to stop this... before..."
There is no need for luke to finish his sentince, everyone knows what must happen...."


They take a ship and head into the dimention hole...
On the other side...
Kyle: "I no longer have control of the ship...."

The ship is guided to a red planet and lands near a swampy forest.

Mara: "I dont like the looks of this..."
(In the level this part will be very similar to the MOTS sith emple swamp.)


Ok people, your turn. And rember, im not taking any shit on this story....

------------------
Thats one small post for me... One giant leap towards my goal of 1000 posts before the year 2000...

AHHHHHHHH! Y3K! Damn, i gotta lay off the Futurama episodes....
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-16, 10:12 AM #2
(a non-story reply)

Wow sounds cool and don't worry if someone goes and makes a joke of this I'll edit the Sith Heck outta their post [http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif]

------------------
-ThreeDee
Emissary from the Third Dimension

In the deathmatch of life, there is a timelimit, but no fraglimit. :)
1999-10-16, 8:45 PM #3
Hey thanks. my idea is for the massassiites to make most of the levels plot. Thats if anyone ever adds anything to it....

ANd i will eventually come up with a better name than Sith hell, but when i was writing that post, it was all i could think of at the time...

------------------
Thats one small post for me... One giant leap towards my goal of 1000 posts before the year 2000...

AHHHHHHHH! Y3K! Damn, i gotta lay off the Futurama episodes....
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-16, 9:16 PM #4
In my philosphy Hell is not so much fire and brimstone and all that stuff, but rather is total seperation from God that results in people being consumed by something with in themselves (example: natural desire to eat food becomes gluttony, natural sexual disire becomes lust, ect, becuase they become all importatnt to us.) SO, you could have freak changes start to break out among the characters at different times, when some disire of theirs becomes lethal important to them (to the point when they are willing to kill to get that disire).
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin that which dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me."

~St. Paul to the church in Rome recorded in Romans 7:15-20.

So that we are set free from sin by Jesus, so we celebrate his birth on Christmas. Remeber this day with joy, when the angels sang, peace on earth good will toward men.

~Merlin
1999-10-16, 9:55 PM #5
Kyle, Mara, and Luke emerge from the ship.

Mara: Ughhh! It stinks worse the sewers of Nal Hutta here.

Dead Corpses of animals liter the ground.

Kyle: Well the ship won't start at all. We'll have to find another way out of here. If we can. . .

Luke looks about. Suddenly he sees what looks like a putrid decaying human corpse with Leia's face.

Luke (half in shock): Kyle, look!

Kyle looks over there and sees nothing.

Kyle: I don't see anything.

Luke turns to look at Kyle then he looks back and there is nothing there.

Luke: I thought I saw Leia dead.

Mara (shivers): This place reminds me of. . .

Kyle (with a stony face): . . . Dromund Kass.

Mara nods.

Kyle: We can't trust anything here. We don't know what's real and what's not. . .
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin that which dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me."

~St. Paul to the church in Rome recorded in Romans 7:15-20.

So that we are set free from sin by Jesus, so we celebrate his birth on Christmas. Remeber this day with joy, when the angels sang, peace on earth good will toward men.

~Merlin
1999-10-17, 6:55 PM #6
Kyle: Maybe me and Mara should lead, we have had more experience in swampy areas

Luke: ok, ill tag along behing

**They walk very slowly though the muck, making sure not to step into a possible trap**

Mara: I really have a very bad feeling about this place

Kyle: Yeah me too

**They continue to walk slowly**
**They hear a Grawl, as if from a Wampa-type creature**
**Mara and Kyle Stand there, they look behind them to find luke missing**

Kyle: Where Luke?!

Mara: oh no...

-------------------------------------------

Kyle and Mara: LUKE!, luke!, LUKE!, LUKE!

**suddenly a wampa-type creature jumps out at them startling them both**
**Kyle and Mara stand there... lightsabers drawn and ready**
**The creature backs away**

Kyle: what in the name of the Force was that?

Mara: I dont know.

**Kyle and Mara walk farther through the muck to find more woods and even deeper swamp water**
**Kyle Checks out his lightsaber to find it not working anymore**

Kyle: Hey, my lightsaber isnt working anymore.

Mara: mine either

Kyle: I really sence alot of... evil in here

Mara: oh my god! look!

Kyle: what what? I dont see anything

Mara: its gone

Kyle: what was it

Mara: it looked like... a Sith lord

Kyle: but isnt Vader dead

Mara: it was something... other than vader

Kyle: well lets quit talking and try to find luke, its getting cold now

*Mara agrees and they continue to walk through the muck just to come to a temple that was hundreds of years old"

Kyle: I think this is the Dark Temple,

Mara: lets check it out

**Mara steps toward the building**

Kyle: no we cant, The lightside cant exist in here, the darkside is so powerful, the force will not go with us if he enter the temple

Mara: and with our lightsabers malfuncioning...

Kyle:... we will virtuly be a moving target... for... whatevers in there...

**Suddenly they hear lukes crys for help comming from the inside of the temple**

........................................
[Continue from here]

------------------
- Commander JeDi BoY of Red Squadron
-- Is that a Cheeseburger or a Stormtrooper


[This message has been edited by JeDiBoY (edited October 17, 1999).]
"Enemy of my Enemy is my Friend"

"If you make it easier, it makes you lazier!"
1999-10-17, 8:11 PM #7
Kyle and Mara have no choice. They must enter the temple. But without the force or thier sabers, they will probably stand no chance.

Mara: "We have to go in..."

Kyle: "Yeah, your right..."

They both walk towards the temple and stop in front of a large door. They notice a sign over the door.. The sign reads: "Abandon all hope."

Kyle: "Now, how are we supposed to get in?"

The temple doors slowly slide open by themselves, behind them is a ghost vision of Obi-wan. (Like in ROTJ)

Obi-Wan spirit: "I come as a message, If you enter, this temple, you will not leave. The lightside does not exist in there."

Mara: "We can't even defend ourselves..."

Obi-Wan spirit: "I will restore your lightsabers. So you can defend yourselves...
But the force.. The lightside is weak at the most in there, even with my help.I cannot help you beyond this point." "The force will be with you... always." With that obi-wan's spirit dissapears, and there lightsabers activate.

Mara and Kyle step past the entrance door, wich closes behind them with a loud thud.
Mara: "I guess we can't leave..."

Kyle: "Never before have i felt so much evil. This place is gonna make Droumund Kaas look like a day in the park..."

Luke's voice faintly in the distance: "Leave... Leave.. While you still can. Save yourselves..."

Mara: "Luke! Were coming to get you..."

A low evil bellowing laugh eminates from the passageway...

To be continued....

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...

[This message has been edited by Ares (edited October 17, 1999).]
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-18, 1:26 PM #8
(woohoo! Let's see if I can't spice things up a bit...)

*Kyle and Mara continue to tread in the Sith-like Temple, hoping to find Luke...in one piece.*

Mara: "Man, this place gives me the chills."

Kyle: "Me too Mara, me too."

*Many thoughts were running in Kyle's mind, but the one that seemed to press the most was about Mara. He thought about how much easier it would be to fend for himself if Mara wasn't there to distract him, and it would be easier to leave alone, without worrying about anyone else but himself. He was thinking of how he could "accidentally" loose her-then he thought how silly he sounded and casted out the evil thoughts. But they still wispered in the back of his mind...)

Mara: "Watch out!"

*Kyle snapped to attention, but he saw nothing.*

Kyle: "Mara, this isn't the time to be playing jokes."

Mara: "I wasn't! I saw it dart across ready to attack, but when I looked where it should of been, it wasn't there."

Kyle: "I think your seeing things Mara, you can't let fear control you."

Mara: (in a cold voice)"Thanks for believing in me Kyle."

*They continued onward and behind them, the shadows creeped behind like apparitions.*
-----------------------------------------
*Meanwhile, Luke has found himself in a dark void, which he appeared to be standing in the middle of.*

Luke: "MARA! KYLE!"*his voice echos off*

*He feels alone, yet he can sense another presence there. He feels weak, yet he has not struggled with anything. He feels powerless, yet the Dark side is there, beckoning him...*

(in case anyone wants to know, the moving shadows are real bad guys. They blend in the background(camaflouge), but prefer to hide in the dark. A person can't directly see it unless they believe that they really are there, like confronting a fear. They only have power if they believe they have power, but make sure any battle has a struggle. I will introduce a more physical bad guy in the next post.)

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited October 18, 1999).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-18, 5:20 PM #9
Im lovin this stuff... Aparition enemies... Great idea, fighting amongst themselvs. Cogging em' will be hell though..(it seems it wil come to that)
Man, i coulda never come up with this all myself...

Keep it up people...

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-19, 3:00 PM #10
[non story post]

This will be a sweet level cant wait to play it

oh Ares, I know alittle bit on levels, 3dos, and cogging, if you need any help, just ask.
I would love to help in this JK level

------------------
- Commander JeDi BoY of Red Squadron
-- Is that a Cheeseburger or a Stormtrooper
"Enemy of my Enemy is my Friend"

"If you make it easier, it makes you lazier!"
1999-10-19, 5:16 PM #11
Soon Padowan. Soon i will begin construction of this level. But for now everyone, lets stick to the story...

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-19, 7:23 PM #12
(I'm back! And the show goes on...)

*Luke feels abandoned from the Light side. Some ally the Force was he thought. Yet the Dark side was always there for him, ready to serve his purposes...he suddnely hears a voice. But it's voice isn't a single voice, but a million voices, echoing, crying, sreaming, vomiting, mocking, hating, dying.*

Voice: (in emperor's voice)"Yes Luke, release your anger. Only then can you join the Dark side of the Force."

Luke: "Palpatine? That can't be. Who are you?"

*Out of the darkness, a body emerges. It wears flowing black robes, you could not see its hands or feet. A hood was drapped over where the head should of been. It then reached to pull the hood off. He then revealed his face: flawless yet with no features. Where its eyes should of been were deep sockets instead, and in each glowed a red pupil, like the embers of a dying fire, or a dying soul.*

Voice: "We are the Darkside. We are one. We are your allies."

Luke: "You are wrong. The Light side is my only ally. (he adds with bitterness)"I'll never join you."

*The Darkside draws close to Luke*

Darkside: "If the Light side is your ally, where is it now?(it pauses to let the words sink into Luke's mind) We never abandon our allies Luke, like your "friends" have."

Luke: "You lie, they haven't abandoned me" *But Luke thought maybe they have, maybe they fled without him, leaving him to rot on the forsaken planet. He grew angry at them, wishing he could see them again, if only to spit in their faces...*

Voice: "Yes, yes...you will be ours."
--------------------------------------------
*Kyle and Mara continue searching for Luke in a vain effort. Mara was still mentally recovering from her experience with what she thought she saw. She thought about Kyle, about how she despised him for always acting superior to everyone. Every since she trained under Kyle, he has only belittled her. She knew that she was better than him, in more control of the Force than Kyle because he had grew too strong in the Force too quick and could not control it. She knew because Kyle strayed to the Dark side before, and she thought what she could accomplish without him.*

Kyle: "Mara, look over there."

*Mara looked over into a dark corner. It looked like a pulsating pile of oily muck, like dark matter.*

Kyle: "What do you think it is?"

Mara: "I don't know, but I'm gonna find out."

*Mara walked over closer to the muck, lightsaber ignited. She poked at the pile and as she figured, it didn't react. Mara then walks away from it.*

Mara: "Figures, nothing but a pile of-"

Kyle: "Watch out!"

*Mara turned around, but before she could defend herself, the dark matter leaped at her and latched on to her body. When it made contact with her, Mara felt like extreme cold and heat had swept her body. She could also see killing others with a foriegn lightsaber, like seeing though a Sith's eyes. It felt like an eternity. Just as Mara felt she could not fight it any longer, Kyle slashed at the dark matter, and it fell to the floor.*

Mara: "What took you so long?"

Kyle: "Did you want me to hit you? And it was only two seconds, so I wouldn't be complaining."

*The two continued down the Dark citadel, the growing hatred for each other becoming more pressing...*

(Merlin, I introduced your Darkside badguy from teh neverending story. I felt he was more appropriate here. OK, now someone else continue please)

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited October 20, 1999).]

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited October 22, 1999).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-19, 7:51 PM #13
Mara and Kyle are now walking down a passageway, arguing.

Mara: "I could of easily defended myself against that damn dark matter thing, but nooooo, you had to come in with your great big ego, and your greater than everyone attitude, and what kind of Jedi are you? a true Jedi would of easily been able to figure out how to save me in a split second!"

Kyle: "Dont you give me that. I didnt want to chance striking you, now that i think about it though maybe i should of...."

Mara: "THAT IS IT! I am fed up with you Katarn, Some Jedi you are, you couldnt even control the force at Droumund Kaas! I ended coming in and Saving your ass..."

Kyle: "Dont give me that bull, Im no Jedi? this coming from Palpitines former assasin..."

Mara stops for a second: "Wha.. What are we doing?"

Kyle stops, realizing the same thing: "Were fighting eachother instead of this temple, its trying to get to us... We have to overcome it Mara, before it destroys BOTH of us..."

Mara: "Your right. We almost gave in to the Darkside, we have to stick together, more now than ever..."

Darkside thinks to himself: "You will give in to the Sith, Jedi's... It is only a matter of time..."

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-20, 11:52 AM #14
Actually the darkside enemy I introduced then, really isn't a single enemy in the usuall sense. I based it off of material I read that was in a book about case studies of demonic possesion. What happens is this character is both, all the people that every were part of the darkside, and yet controlled by a single entity (in the book that would be satan and the others lesser demons) and it keeps using I and we and me and us interchagenabley. And there are thousands present. And it only hates for hatred sake. At least that was what it was when I introduced it before someone kick it out of the other story, thanks for bringing it back.
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin that which dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me."

~St. Paul to the church in Rome recorded in Romans 7:15-20.

So that we are set free from sin by Jesus, so we celebrate his birth on Christmas. Remeber this day with joy, when the angels sang, peace on earth good will toward men.

~Merlin
1999-10-20, 1:23 PM #15
(Sure thing merlin...would you like to write some with the Darkside character you introduced? It would help to know how he as a character acts, though now I know he is really many. I'm liking this story, but my brain is starting to run out of stuff for this[besides the final battle of course, I got that figured out] and would like some other situations unless you want to get to the climax now. And about the Dark matter enemies: they are suppose to be like the souls of former sith, and you can only hurt them if you believe you can hurt them[like in the book "IT"]. Later.)
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-20, 8:12 PM #16
Mara and Kyle press on into the templa with the power of darkside growing every minute.

Kyle: Somethings not right, weve been walking for hours yet weve gotten nowhere

Mara: ive realized that too, it must be some kind of trick we have to find a way ....

A noise that can only be described as rusted metal grinding against bone emerges behind Kyle and Mara.

Kyle jumps to the left while Mara jumps right. When they are ten feet apart fromm each other, a huge balck stone slab splits the two apart.

Mara: Kyle!!!!!

Mara ignites her lightsaber and slashes into the ancient stone. As soon as the briliant blue saber came into contact with the stone it immediatly shut down.

Mara: Shaph i knew it. it's corash stone. The lightsaber cant cut through it. I need another way to reach kyle.
--------------------------------------------
Kyle: MARA!!! danm i neeed her help... Luke is a gonner without the combined power of me and Mara

Darkside as Luke:Kyle over here

Kyle: Luke is that you?!?

--------------------------------------------
u can contune on with the story ill add on later



------------------
~RobX
[url="mailto:RobX2001@aol.com"]mailto:RobX2001@aol.com[/url]RobX2001@aol.com</A>
http://nwg.itgo.com-curious aint ya :D
Got Cog's?
mailto:RobX2001@aol.comRobX2001@aol.com</A>
Next Wave Gaming

I find your lack of underpants disturbing


1999-10-21, 5:17 PM #17
*As Kyle is interuped by a fake Luke
Mara remembers she brought a blaster with her, she takes it out and shoots it... nothing happens...*

*Mara Hears kyles screams from behind the rock... but there nothing she can do*

Mara: I hear you kyle, and is that luke?!

Kyle (Faint Voice): Mara!... use the Force and lift up the rock! im too weak right now, I think I hear Luke!

*Mara Uses the force and lifts up the rock just enough so she can see kyle, then it falls back down*
***BOOOOOM*** was the sound when it came crashing down

*Unstable Pillers started falling down at the sound and crash of the concussion*

Mara: this part of the temple is COLAPSING

Kyle: QUICKLY MARA! THERES NOT MUCH TIME! I Cant go on without you!

(((([ ooooooooooooohhh A Cliff Hanger here! you decide what happens next! ]))))

------------------
- Commander JeDi BoY of Red Squadron
-- Is that a Cheeseburger or a Stormtrooper


[This message has been edited by JeDiBoY (edited October 21, 1999).]
"Enemy of my Enemy is my Friend"

"If you make it easier, it makes you lazier!"
1999-10-21, 6:16 PM #18
Mara has no choice. There is only one thing that could possibly destroy this obstacle. Force Destruction.

Mara: "Kyle, Use destruction on the wall, two blasts SHOULD blow through it."

Kyle: "In i SITH TEMPLE?!? Use the darkside?!?"

Mara: "We have no choice!"

Kyle: "Your right, on 3..."

Mara and Kyle have no choice but to use a dark power. Mara and Kyle open thier minds to the Darkside...

Mara: "1... 2... 3!"

With that, both release a amplified blast of destruction(because of all the dark power), that easily blows through the wall.

Mara Dosent waste any time for the dust to clear, hoping the wall was blown. She leaps through the dust and lands safley on the other side, just in time too. Kyle sees the tunnel collapse on the other side.

Kyle: "Mara, we are weak to the Darkside now because we had to open our minds to it. Resist it!"

Mara: "Im trying...."

Kyle and Mara are both able to resist the darkside, but are left very weak in the process. Kyle and Mara sit resting.

Mara: "We cant stay in this area for long, we have to get moving..."

Kyle: "We have another problem too. We have just run out of food rashons... We need to find or get supplies.."

To be continued...

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-21, 6:28 PM #19
Hey Ares, I'm loving the story. But I want to know if you could edit one of your posts to talk about what the sith temple looks like. Give it definition and quality that is worthy of this story. Wish I could think of something to add(hate writer's block). Maybe at one point later on, Kyle and Mara split up where the Darkside can prey on them alone, without support. Then they could meet up where Luke is and then have the final battle, where perhaps they can find out that Obi-won's words about the force is with them always being true and absorb and reflect the power of the darkside. What do you think?
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-21, 6:46 PM #20
I'd just like to point out that Force destruction isn't indiginous to the darkside, whether you are on the dark or light side is determined by HOW you use the force... not WHAT PARTS of it you use..

[http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif]

------------------
-ThreeDee
Emissary from the Third Dimension

In the deathmatch of life, there is a timelimit, but no fraglimit. :)
1999-10-21, 7:08 PM #21
I agree with Threedee, to a degree. I say change your post to mention that Mara hopes the destruction kills kyle or somehting to that effect. And you liking the story threedee?
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-22, 4:29 PM #22
why would she want to kill kyle?

------------------
Good pitching can always stop good hitting and vice versa.
- Yogi Berra?
‹^› //‹{°;°}›\\ ‹^›
1999-10-22, 4:56 PM #23
--I've come as requested!--

Dark Voice (to Luke): You know, your sister's dead body you saw in the swamp. That wasn't an illusion, it was a vision! Of her future!

Luke (miserable): Shut up!

Voice (every pause is followed with and echo sound like those in Mots sith catacombs): But you can't silence me. . . I am part of you. . . (rising to a cresendo) You can't deny it. . . I WILL HAVE YOU!!! (Scream fades into nothingness.

---------------------------------------------

Meanwhile Mara and Kyle have continued to walk.

Mara: Kyle I'm sorry about . . .

She turns to look at Kyle but he isn't there.

Mara: Kyle? KYLE!

Kyle suddenly has found himself in a room filled with sith carvings in the walls. The air is stale in the room. He looks about and suddenly realizes this room has no exits! No doors, no tunnels, nothing!

Dark Voice: That's right Kyle, no exits! Just like being seal in a . . . tomb. Your tomb Kyle. Unless you join us.

The shadows on the far side of the room begin to flow from their places. They swirl and merge to form the shadowy form of a man.

Kyle: What are you!

Voice: I am the darkside. It past (the shadow in a flash of light now looks like Darth Maul) . . . It's present (in the same fashion it becomes a figure he doesn't recognize, but he has no doubt it is the image of some living dark jedi) . . . It future (in the same fashion, again, it now looks like Kyle himself the voice is now his voice too). . .Your future. . . You have no choice, just as you really didn't at Dromund Kaas. You were always meant to be a dark jedi. Just so far you've avoided that fate. You could have killed Jan that day, then killed Jerec in the valley and taken your true calling. You were given another chance at Dromund Kaas. But Mara intervened and averted your destiny then. But it has ALWAYS BEEN YOUR DESTINY. Now you will fufill you destiny. . . Either as one of us or a corpse.

Voice fades into whispers and vanishes.
---------------------------------------------

Luke still in that dark place and now the voice returns. He could hear what had been said to kyle.

Voice: We know you could hear what I said to Kyle. It is your destiny too Luke. . . You nearly took it when you battled your father. You did take it for a time while you served the Emperor. You have felt that call many times.

Luke refuses to listen.

Voice: We didn't tell you yet how your sister will die.

Luke despite himself feels he wants to know in hopes of preventing it.

Voice: You will kill her. Once you join us you will use the force and bring her to the swamp. And then you will strike her down as a sacrifice to us for eternal life that we offer. We did not even offer it to Palpatine, but you, YOU are . . . special. But before you can do that you will have to do something worse. You will join us by offering us an even better. . . . sacrifice. To strike down you wife, Mara.

Luke: You know I won't join you, you know I won't do THAT!

Voice: But you won't think that when the time comes. When you do the act you will tell her you . . ."love" her and then you will kill her and you will like it! We know you will, because for us you already have. . .
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin that which dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me."

~St. Paul to the church in Rome recorded in Romans 7:15-20.

So that we are set free from sin by Jesus, so we celebrate his birth on Christmas. Remeber this day with joy, when the angels sang, peace on earth good will toward men.

~Merlin
1999-10-22, 6:36 PM #24
Man this rules!

But when did Luke marry Mara?

hmm.
In the deathmatch of life, there is a timelimit, but no fraglimit. :)
1999-10-22, 6:40 PM #25
Well, i know no one force power is indigionous to either side, but i think in a place like this, they would want to avoid using any dark power, it just seemed like the right way to put it.

Now to get back to the story...


Kyle has bean sealed in his tomb unless he turns to the darkside. "YOU WILL NOT GET AWAY WITH THIS DARKSIDE!" He yells.

voice of Darkside echoing: "I already have."

Kyle rembers what luke told him about a conversation he had with Obi-Wan on the Falcon

(Begin flashback.)

Obi-wan: "Rember a Jedi can feel the force flowing through him"

Luke: "You mean it controls your actions?"

Obi-Wan: "Partially. but it also obeys your commands."

(End flashback.)

Kyle closes his eyey and lets the force enter him. Kyle then realives there is something not quite right about the room. He can feel that it is only a illusion. and resists it. He opens his eyes, and watches the room disolve away.

Mara was about to continue walking, thinking she had become permenanty seperated from Kyle. She is about to start walking when suddenly he appears in front of her.

Mara: "Kyle!"

But Kyle is to weak to respond.

Mara thinks to herself: We need to get some supplies and set up camp somewere safe, we need rest.

Darkside to Mara: "Your friend has a strong concience. Lets test YOUR endurance now."

Mara sees a pair of stone skeleton statues holding scythes come to life

Mara: "Oh this cant be good..." Lights her saber and prepares for combat..

(Unlike most things, the skeletons weapons cant be cut through with a saber.)

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-22, 7:23 PM #26
--I got Ares ok to do this--

Suddenly Luke finds himself with his saber drawn standing behind the two skeletons. He quickly strikes down the two skeletons. Then he rushes over to Mara. For a moment they embrace.

Luke: Thank the force you are alright.

He kisses her.

Luke: I love you mara.

No sooner had he spoke those words but he felt a strange urge with in himself. He is still holding his lightsaber in hand.

Mara: I love you to --

Luke activates his lightsaber blade and the green blade extends outward and it stabs into Mara's stomach.

Mara (in extreme pain): LUKE . . .

Mara falls to the ground clutching the wounds gasping for breath.

Luke feels the urge flow over him a second time. He turns his lightsaber so the blade point straight down over Mara.

Mara: Luke. . . what are you . . . Luke, no. NO!

Luke stabs the blade downward into Mara, and as she dies she screams, like Luke screamed as the Emperor attacked him on the second death star, but this time their was no Anikin to save her from Luke.

Luke stared at her for a couple of minutes after she stoped moving. Then slowly he backed away from her dead body. Then he turned and ran. Not caring where he ran as long as it was away from what he had done. And after running through some dark tunnels he found himself at the temple entrance. But he didn't stop he ran until he reached the ship. Then he went inside to the cockpit and found it fully operational.

Luke looks down at his hands as he did once on the second death star when he saw the similarity between his hands and his father.

Luke (to himself): What have I done?!

Voice (whispers in his ear): Now you are one of us!

Luke was terrified of what dark urge possessed him to kill Mara. Now he knew there was no reason to stay here. So he started up the ship and headed home.

---------------------------------------------
Meanwhile Mara stood ready to fight the skeletal warriors.

--In case you didn't guess it all that Luke just did is an illusion meant for him. Please do have him just get out of it. I was thinking of him going back to coruscant and meeting Han and Leia and others he knows. But they don't show any love for him only cold indifference. As if they know what he has done (even though he knows noone else knows). He has to deal with it now (in the illusion of course.)

[This message has been edited by Merlin (edited October 22, 1999).]

[This message has been edited by Merlin (edited October 22, 1999).]
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin that which dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me."

~St. Paul to the church in Rome recorded in Romans 7:15-20.

So that we are set free from sin by Jesus, so we celebrate his birth on Christmas. Remeber this day with joy, when the angels sang, peace on earth good will toward men.

~Merlin
1999-10-22, 8:56 PM #27
(Hmm...I wonder why you threw in the stone skeletons Ares(cough)? Heehee, but I'll go with it. May I suggest though that you refine the skins for the enemies you made though)

*Mara lashes at the stone skeleton in front of her, attempting to chop the scythe in half when to her surprise it stays very much in one piece*

Mara: "Well, I guess you want to fight the hard way."

*the skeleton in front of her arches its scythe to cleave her head, but Mara strafes to her right as it comes down and she slashes the foe's back with her lightsaber. Mara looks down confidently at her now still opponent, but then senses that someone is still behind her. The other skeleton! She quickly ducks, just in time as she sees the scythe swing right where her neck was. She backs up, preparing to fight the enemy.*

Mara: "Come here you ugly creep."

*The skeleton executes an underswing, arching it from floor to ceiling, and nearly slicing mara in half vertically. Mara then swings with her lightsaber at the skeleton creature, but it blocks her attack. She swings several more times, but the skeleton blocks her with its scythe. It then begins to perform a very powerful down swing, but as it comes down, Mara grabs teh stick and holding on to it, pulls it over her with the skeleton still holding to it. The skeleton then shattered on the ground from the force of the move Mara pulled. Mara stares at the skeleton, not quite sure if she is to believe it were truely defeated.*

(I wasn't sure how good these guys are, so I left their demise uncertain. Also, I plan to bring back the apparition creatures for Mara and Kyle to fight. And has Luke in the story gone into a mental breakdown or something? All three are going to be pretty weak when the final battle comes, don't you think? And when you make the level Ares, how about some zombie-like guys outside the temple to blend in with the dead bodies that are suppose to be laying around. Oh, and something else, are you going to introduce the spider creatures you wanted to do?)

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited October 23, 1999).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-23, 2:21 PM #28
--Hey for an enemy you could have a head that suddenly flies up from the ground where it was laying and for an attack it head bangs you! (like a storm trooper punch) and cuase they fly about it'll be hard to hit them!
"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin that which dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me."

~St. Paul to the church in Rome recorded in Romans 7:15-20.

So that we are set free from sin by Jesus, so we celebrate his birth on Christmas. Remeber this day with joy, when the angels sang, peace on earth good will toward men.

~Merlin
1999-10-23, 6:23 PM #29
Bout the head enemies... I have something similar completed. Im bascly recreating the Lost Souls from doom... Man those things were annoying... Anyways, like the doom version they will have a trail of fire behind them (sprites) and they will shoot fireballs. (Basicly the temple equivalant of a Mynoc{The flying things in JK}.)

The skelletons will basicly be the Temple equivilant of a stormtrooper, not overly smart, but tough.

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-23, 6:30 PM #30
(This sounds fun! I can't wait to see it finished! [http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif] )
The trick to flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
1999-10-23, 8:11 PM #31
(I'm assuming that how Mara fought the skeletons was OK Ares, so I am going to continue, and check your mail)

*After the attack with the skeleton warriors, Mara stood in ready position, expecting them to come back to life and continue fighting. When she feels that they have been defeated, Mara walks over to the temporary camp where Kyle lies recuperating.*

Mara: "How you coming along Kyle?"

Kyle: "I've felt better. We need to find something to eat Mara, I've forgotten how long its been since I've last eaten."

Mara: "I'll try to find something, just hang in there."

*Mara then searches around the temple, wondering how she would be able to find something eatable in this wretched place. But after some wandering, she found a exit ouside the temple into a dilapetated garden area, scattered with dead bodies and overgrown plants. She grabbed one of the dead bodies and some berries and took tehm back to the camp, where she prepared tehm to eat. They both started eating, noticeing the food was bitter and did not feel that it filled their stomachs.*

Kyle: (after he had finished eating)"We should get some sleep. We can't go on fighting not fully concsious."

Mara: "I suppose. But I don't think either one of us will be having plesant dreams."

*They both then uneasily fell to sleep. The two both had nightmares of the hooded figure clad in black robes, of shadows that attacked them, of fighting each other. When they woke, Mara turned to Kyle.*

Mara: "I had terrible nightmares, all involving a figure in black robes. I couldn't see his face under his hood."

Kyle: "I had similar visions. we should continue our search for Luke."

*They packed up the camp and continued to follow down the Dark Temple. A shadowy figure swept by them.*

Mara: "There it is again! Did you see it Kyle?"

Kyle: "Yes, I saw it. But I don't want to fight it, whatever it is."

Mara: "We have to Kyle, we have to confront our fears. How else can we be prepared for the hooded man in our dreams?"

Kyle: "Your right Mara, let's confront it."

*They walked to the shadowy corner they believed it fled to, using their sabers to light the darken area. As the darkness dispersed, a greyish/black sillouette still stood there, a vague shadow in a human shape. In a sudden motion, it lept towards Kyle, attacking it with what appeared to be its arms. Kyle swung madly with its saber, finally striking it, the shadow being then fell to the ground.*

Mara: "Look Kyle, more of them!"

*Barely visible in the dark places of the temple, they could see darker black moving against the black shadows of the temple. Kyle then charges at one of the shadow beings, but before he can strike it, it seems to dissapear from his sight.*

Mara: "Kyle, behind you!"

*Kyle spun around, swinging his saber to strike the attacking shadow. But the shadow quickly strafed away from his saber and attacked his side. Kyle then delievered a blow with his saber before it could evade his attack. Mara had been watching Kyle fight off his opponent and did not see the approching shadow coming for her. Sensing its presence, she turns around to defend herself.*

Mara: "We have to move away from here quickly."

*Mara and Kyle head for an exit while defending themselves from the shadow beings.*

(Ares, this would be the only place in the level with lots of these types to fight off. They would usually be spaced out, hiding in the shadows and creeping up behind them to attack them. They would be the opposite of a skeleton warrior: smart and fast but weak. The two bad guys should compliment each other nicely. And of course the Darkside character would be smart, fast AND strong: he has to be a pain in the a** to fight, after all, he's the collective darkside)

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited October 24, 1999).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-23, 10:07 PM #32
Hmm those head enemies... a lot like Zelda [http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif]

Also don't use sprites for the trail unless you have something particular in mind... just have a pulse making persuation particles behind it, but make a new template for them with the blood or fire mat... Looks better, more 3d [http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif]

------------------
-ThreeDee
Emissary from the Third Dimension

In the deathmatch of life, there is a timelimit, but no fraglimit. :)
1999-10-23, 10:07 PM #33
Well, right now im focusing on the story before the level. I would like to have the story completed before i start the level, that way, i dont have to make up stuff as i go along. I will construct the enemies first though. When it comes time for the level, i will design the level around the story.

But as you probably have all guessed, the final version of the story will be edited to work better, amd be more evened out. there are parts of this story that i can already see will need serious adusting, but im not worrying about that now.

Look for a version after the Level is released (if ever) of things cut from it.)

SITH HELL OUTTAKES!
Luke: "I thought I saw Leia dead."
Mara (shivers): "This place reminds me of..."
Kyle: "Um... err... ah crap, what was my line?"
-Beep-

Sith Skeleton comes at mara, and trips on a crack in the floor.
Sith skelleton(face down on floor.): "Ah *beep*..."
-Beep-

Sith Skeleton swings scythe at kyle, misses, and gets blade stuck in wall.
Sith skelleton: "Um, a little help please.."
Kyle and Mara assist in trying to yank scythe out of the wall, but fail.
Sith skelleton(Towards offstage): "How many times do i have to tell you idiots to use FOAM props..."
-Beep-

Mara cuts skelleton in half, and looses her balance falling backwards and landing on top of kyle.
Other Sith skelleton: "This is my opponent?"
Mara: "When the *beep* is someone gonna call cut?"
Director: "Cu-"
-Beep-

Alright, he he, seriously now, lets get back to the real story...

------------------
Y2K is coming! Be afraid... Be VERY afraid...
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-23, 10:16 PM #34
ROFLMAO!!!!!God, the outakes are hilarious! OK, and none of the serious adjusting has to do with my parts, do they?(obviously there won't be a part where you have to find food and sleep)but the rest is fairly OK, right?
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
1999-10-24, 6:36 AM #35
i have an idea for the dark enemies: have them wearing an all black skin. also make the skin transoarent(im assuming that the whole level would be dark)

------------------
SAY IT AINT SO! I WILL NOT GO! TURN THE LIGHTS OFF! CARRY ME HOME!-Blink182
SAY IT AINT SO! I WILL NOT GO! TURN THE LIGHTS OFF! CARRY ME HOME!-Blink182
1999-10-24, 7:48 AM #36
Right on the mark Bobafett, they would be translucent and black/grey skin. They would also be as non-corpral looking as possible(meaning that the arm will look more like a wave of smoke). Now making them fast and smart is the hard part...
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
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1999-10-24, 10:20 AM #37
also set the light mode to 3 or whatever so they can be seen in the dark level, especially if they're translucent

------------------
-ThreeDee
Emissary from the Third Dimension

In the deathmatch of life, there is a timelimit, but no fraglimit. :)
1999-10-24, 10:30 AM #38
oo this is gonna be neat [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif] ! If you need any extra help, i'd LOVE to help with the skins! [http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif]
The trick to flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
1999-10-24, 12:32 PM #39
What the hell am i getting myself into here... lol...

Yes about 90% of the level will be dark, (except fior the few parts that take place in outside areas.)

And i plan on having the level steadly go deeper and deeper. Like there going down into the bowels of hell...

What im toying with the idea of doing for computer enemy intelegence, is possible starting with the Synced enemy cog, (Works in SP too...)

Oh crap i have to go right now... Ill write more later.

Ok, were was i.. Oh yeah, What im toying with the idea of doing for computer enemy intelegence, is possible starting with the Synced enemy cog, and making it smarter. The way i figure it, you can make the cog smarter than a AI because with AI:
1.) There are very few commands that can be put in the AI file.
2.) The commands even when used as best as possible, arent overly bright anyway.

But with cogs, there is a emormous field of commands that can be used in any order and applied to eachother in almost any way, wich SHOULD make it possible to make a computer enemy with a COG ai, much smarter than one controlled by JK's normal AI files.

[This message has been edited by Ares (edited October 24, 1999).]
Shutup brain or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
1999-10-24, 3:55 PM #40
Threedee, about the shadow enemies. I suppose they could be light to the point that you can see them at all, but they have to be able to hide as well, we don't want attacking lightbulbs. Remeber, in the story, they have trouble finding them. Man, I'm loving this story!
Oh, and Ares, should I draw some pics of teh characters(like the shadow beings, the Darkside, and dark matter) along with the surroundings and possibly some level designs(for what has been written already)? I could e-mail them to you, and you could either use it as a guide or forward the e-mail to someone else to make.

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited October 24, 1999).]
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