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☖ Forums → Discussion Forum → Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris
2006-01-24, 12:35 AM #1
[http://www.monkeyview.net/id/2470/default/Chuck_Norris.jpg]

Say hello. If you do not close this within 1.12682872 milliseconds of reading this, you die due to roundhouse kick related deaths. You have been warned. Remember, ifyou can see chuck, he can see you....


















































If you cant see Chuck Norris, you are seconds away from death.
In Tribute to Adam Sliger. Rest in Peace

10/7/85 - 12/9/03
2006-01-24, 1:35 AM #2
. . .




[http://www.sorrowind.net/imagecorner/134/9.gif]
SnailIracing:n(500tpostshpereline)pants
-----------------------------@%
2006-01-24, 2:33 AM #3
http://roundhousetotheface.ytmnd.com/
Pissed Off?
2006-01-24, 3:56 AM #4
When Chuck Norris does a push up......

He pushes the earth DOWN!
"Oh my god. That just made me want to start cutting" - Aglar
"Why do people from ALL OVER NORTH AMERICA keep asking about CATS?" - Steven, 4/1/2009
2006-01-24, 5:58 AM #5
Daddy, can I be a Texas Ranger when I grow up?
Code:
if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}
2006-01-24, 6:02 AM #6
One day Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at McDonalds. When the employee asked him if he wanted fries with that, Chuck Norris had sex with his girlfriend, taped it, and mailed the tape to him for Christmas.
D E A T H
2006-01-24, 6:09 AM #7
Me like.

[http://www.igophoto.net/evcatalyst/images/__conanlever.gif]
The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.

-G Man
2006-01-24, 6:10 AM #8
In that clip of Chuck getting hit, he's not actually getting hit. They swing the thing at him, and he ducks and punches the attacker. They had to edit the film, and then cut to a clip of a guy who looks nothing like Chuck getting hit by a thing.

Watch it closely. It's obvious that I'm right.
2006-01-24, 6:53 AM #9
I think you may be...
2006-01-24, 7:38 AM #10
I think it's funny that almost all the Chuck Norris 'facts' are stolen from the Vin Diesel ones. And the Vin Diesel ones came first.
"Jayne, this is something the Captain has to do for himself"

"N-No it's not!"

"Oh."
2006-01-24, 7:42 AM #11
Hehe, that clip of Chuck getting hit in the face with a paddle is hilarious. I say good riddance. All these Chuck fanboys are annoying.
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2006-01-24, 8:53 AM #12
Someone asked God "Can you create a boulder so heavy even you can't lift it" and God created Chuck Norris
Yeah, you stay here and take life seriously. I'll go and have some fun.
2006-01-24, 9:13 AM #13
Vin Disel...has nothing on Chuck Norris. How...how could you even......ahhh **** we are about to have our first round house related death at massassi
In Tribute to Adam Sliger. Rest in Peace

10/7/85 - 12/9/03
2006-01-24, 9:23 AM #14
Chuck Norris supporters will be BANNED ON SIGHT.

Vin Diesel all the way.
2006-01-24, 9:28 AM #15
Chuck Norris rapes Vin Diesel in the face.
2006-01-24, 9:30 AM #16
I am the only one here who doesn't know or care who the **** he is?
nope.
2006-01-24, 9:34 AM #17
AND THATS WHY EVERYONE HATES YOU
2006-01-24, 9:35 AM #18
I hate Chuck Norris. I could kick his *** too.
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2006-01-24, 9:44 AM #19
My English teacher once had a student that was trained by Chuck Norris. That practically makes me a ninja.
2006-01-24, 9:52 AM #20
I have become a certified bearded ninja by posting beneath Axis.
Was cheated out of lions by happydud
Was cheated out of marriage by sugarless
2006-01-24, 10:08 AM #21
Originally posted by Baconfish:
I am the only one here who doesn't know or care who the **** he is?

No. I'm in the dark too.
Hey, Blue? I'm loving the things you do. From the very first time, the fight you fight for will always be mine.
2006-01-24, 10:29 AM #22
Originally posted by Freelancer:
I hate Chuck Norris. I could kick his *** too.



Haha, you are going to die due to roundhouse kick related injuries. I pity the fool.
In Tribute to Adam Sliger. Rest in Peace

10/7/85 - 12/9/03
2006-01-24, 4:22 PM #23
Chuck Norris is the only person in the history of Tae Kwon Do to be promoted to an 8th degree black belt.

That's actually true, and rather impressive. He also went something like 18 years without ever finishing less than first in a fighting competition.

The man really is a badass. He just has really bad acting skills and political views.
>>untie shoes
2006-01-24, 4:28 PM #24
Aka there's now way in hell that Free could ever kick his ***, even as Chuck advances into old age. BWahahnanhayayhaa.
2006-01-24, 4:55 PM #25
And that's damn true.
Pissed Off?
2006-01-24, 4:57 PM #26
Aw, come on. Give me some credit. I could probably kick his *** when he's on his deathbed...
"it is time to get a credit card to complete my financial independance" — Tibby, Aug. 2009
2006-01-24, 4:58 PM #27
Maybe :p

http://chucknorriscantstoptherock.ytmnd.com/
http://chuckkick.ytmnd.com/
http://everydaychuck.ytmnd.com/
http://chuckfacts.ytmnd.com/
http://chucknorrisposter.ytmnd.com/
Pissed Off?
2006-01-24, 5:04 PM #28
Originally posted by Freelancer:
Aw, come on. Give me some credit. I could probably kick his *** when he's on his deathbed...


He'll never die.
2006-01-24, 5:09 PM #29
Originally posted by Avenger:
Maybe :p

http://chuckfacts.ytmnd.com/

I laughed so hard at that one
2006-01-24, 5:37 PM #30
Yeah, I thought that one was pretty good.
Pissed Off?
2006-01-24, 5:38 PM #31
You guys obviously do not understand the significance of Chuck Norris. Shame on you. Shame. On. You.
In Tribute to Adam Sliger. Rest in Peace

10/7/85 - 12/9/03
2006-01-24, 5:40 PM #32
Chuck Norris' boot to their face will make them understand.
Pissed Off?
2006-01-24, 5:42 PM #33
No, it'll make them die.
2006-01-24, 5:44 PM #34
Finally. Someone has understood Chuck Norris.
In Tribute to Adam Sliger. Rest in Peace

10/7/85 - 12/9/03
2006-01-24, 5:48 PM #35
Originally posted by Baconfish:
I am the only one here who doesn't know or care who the **** he is?


Nope, me too.

All Chuck Norris does now is informercials. Yeah, real great acting career right there.
2006-01-24, 6:00 PM #36
HAVE YOU NOT READ WHAT HAS BEEN WRITTEN HERE? DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH YOU ARE PUTTING YOUR LIFE AT RISK? DO YOU CHOOOSE JUST NOT TO LISTEN?

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a ****ing Indian.


DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT COULD HAPPEN TO YOU?

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris has counted to inifity. Twice.



DO YOU UNDERSTAND NOW?

Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

HOW ABOUT NOW?


The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.



OR NOW
In Tribute to Adam Sliger. Rest in Peace

10/7/85 - 12/9/03
2006-01-24, 6:01 PM #37
LMAO
Code:
if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}
2006-01-24, 6:10 PM #38
Chuck Norris can lick my balls.
2006-01-24, 6:10 PM #39
can I ?
Code:
if(getThingFlags(source) & 0x8){
  do her}
elseif(getThingFlags(source) & 0x4){
  do other babe}
else{
  do a dude}
2006-01-24, 7:21 PM #40
LOL @ Ubuu's post :)
Historians are the most powerful and dangerous members of any society. They must be watched carefully... They can spoil everything. - Nikita Khrushchev.
Kill one man, and you are a murderer. Kill millions of men, and you are a conqueror. Kill them all, and you are a god. - Jean Rostand.
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