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ForumsInteractive Story Board → The Never-ending Story Thread²
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The Never-ending Story Thread²
2004-03-14, 12:40 PM #121
Meanwhile, back at the camp, CM and Qwerty are beginning to stir

CM: Ah, that's better. Now I’m hungry, though. Hey, get up!

He nudges Qwerty until he finally wakes up

Qwerty: Ugh. What do you want? I'm not working today. It’s my day off.

CM: Umm... do you know where we are?

Qwerty: What? Oh, sorry bout that. Just a bit of early morning amnesia. Anyway, what is it?

CM: Do you have any food in that pack of yours? I’m famished.

Qwerty: well, I’ve got some energy bars in there. Not the best breakfast, but it will give you energy.

CM: I guess it will have to do. Pass it over.

Qwerty gives him a small bar of some sort. CM bites into it, and then spits it out.

CM: This tastes like crap!

Qwerty: Well excuse me. I don't see you with any travel sized nutritious foods. It’s just an early design, anyway. I haven't gotten to taste yet.

CM: Well, what's in it?

Qwerty: Um, well I’m not entirely sure, but-

CM: Ok, that's it. You don't even know what's in your own food? I'll last till we can find something edible. That definitely isn't.

Qwerty: Well, it can’t be that bad. Let me try.

Qwerty takes the bar from CM and takes a bite, then spits it out.

Qwerty: Yes, well... perhaps I need a bit of work on the taste-

Cm: Ha! Told you so!

Qwerty: Oh, be quiet. I told you it was an early design.

Qwerty throws the bar away and takes out his monitor.

Qwerty: Hmm.. lets just see where we are, exactly… Oh no. No no no!

CM: What is it?

Qwerty: Its Thrawn42689. He’s headed this way! And let me see... yes, he has Ahnuld with him. But how did they find out where we are?

CM: It doesn’t matter. We have to get out of here. With what you’ve told me of Thrawn, I don’t want to fight him just yet. But I need a visual to teleport!

Qwerty: Well, I happen to have some photographs of the surrounding terrain, but where do you want to go?

WHERE WILL CM AND QWERTY HEAD NOW? WILL THEY EVER ESCAPE FROM THOSE ANNOYING ROBOTS?[/b]

Thrawn42689, distant: I heard that!

What? Wow, that’s some good hearing he has. Anyway: WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED TO TOD? WILL QWERTY EVER LEARN ANY MAGIC? AND WILL AIKANARO RETURN WITH A PINK TUTU? ALL THIS AND MORE MAY OR MAY NOT BE ANSWERED ON THE NEXT EXCITING EPISODE OF NES²!!![/b]


------------------
"No good can ever come from staying with normal people"
-Outlaw Star
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul"
-Tycho, Penny Arcade
"I'm a Cannabal-Vegitarian. I will BBQ an employee if there is no veggie option"
-DX:IW

[This message has been edited by Noble Outlaw (edited March 14, 2004).]
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
The Never Ending Story²
"I consume the life essence itself!... Preferably medium rare" - Mauldis

-----@%
2004-03-14, 6:00 PM #122
On a planet far away a warrior stands when suddenly an alien being rised up from out of nowhere and stares right into the warrior's face, pointing it's weapon.

Alien: sslaarghyfgysdsakjg sslhjkgsahkjaj

The warrior quickly raises her weapon and fires at the alien, the alien steps back and falls to the ground

Qhobeg: DIE SPACE PIRATE SCUM!!!

Qhobeg then runs to the nearest save point

Qhobeg: That's enough Metroid for today... what else do these guys have... oh look Mario Kart..

Qhobeg continues playing on the Gamecube of Heroes

------------------
wang is within all
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2004-03-16, 3:11 AM #123
*TLTE comes to. He is not, in fact, blown into component atoms. He is rather well, actually. Well...he is suffering from neck pains, and to be brutally honest, he needs a shower after his voyage through Hell. But really, compared to being blown into component atoms, he is doing VERY well. And many of the NeS Heroes are permanently in more dire need of a shower than he.*

TLTE: So what now? Hmmmm.....er......hmmmmmm..........hmm-hmmmmmm......oh yeah!

*He opens his eyes. A haunted house stands before him.*

TLTE: Groovy.

*TLTE enters the house, fumbling for the ghost repellant on his utility belt as he does so. After a surprisingly long time, he realises that he has neither a utility belt nor ghost repellant, and quite honestly, doubts the existance or at least the effective potential of such a substance. Relatively nonplussed, he walks up the creaky stairs.*

TLTE: Heeeeere, Gebby Gebby Gebby Gebby.....Kriiiiiiiiiigggg, where are youuuuuuuuuu......Cooooool Mattttyyyyy??

*Various huge red eyes and razor-sharp fangs hang on the periphery of TLTE's vision, surveying his progress.*

TLTE: Hmm..... Ford??? JK the White??? Highemperor???

*At that point, his blissful search is interrupted by a generically-terrifying, fang-gnashing monster.*

Monster: RRRRRAAAAAAAAAGHHHGHGHGH!!!!11oneoenone

TLTE: Roiks! Roim retting outta rere!!!!

*He does as Geb would do. The monster gives pursuit...*


[This message has been edited by The Last True Evil (edited March 16, 2004).]
The Last True Evil - consistent nobody in the Discussion Forum since 1998
2004-03-16, 4:34 PM #124
Meanwhile (NeS count: ow, my head) in a still-yet-to-be-disclosed location, Evil Geb monitors the signs of the newly-arrived villian-types on a nearby monitor.

Evil Geb: I will have to meet with these robots soon, but first, to figure out where my counterpart is...

The evil Gebohq types "Gebohq" in what appears to be a search bar, and the monitor flickers for a moment, followed by some churning sounds.

monitor: Search results: 7 matches found.

Evil Geb: What? This piece of junk must be broken... where's the first one.

The monitor changes to show signs of himself on a map of the room he is occupying.

Evil Geb: Right -- NOT ME you worthless scrap of metal!

monitor: [http://forums.massassi.net/html/tongue.gif]

The computer screen then shows a map of the Hall of Heroes, and a lone sign quite stationary.

Evil Geb: That's better. Hrm... best pull him here and confront him alone while I have the chance. This wayrail contraption should help me do just that...

Giving the nearby console a good kick, the forum wayrail device coughs and sputters, and the giant ring device begins to charge...

-----------------------------------------

In the Hall of Heroes...

Qhobeg: Last lap and I'll win the 150cc all cup -- what the??

A green portal suddenly appears, sucking Qhobeg inside.

Qhobeg: No, not when I'm so close to beating the game!

--------------------------------------------

Evil Gebohq smiles as Qhobeg is dumped in front of him, but it quickly fades as the wayrail device apparantly dies on him, leaving only a few flickering flourescent lights to shine any life in the chamber.

Evil Geb: Damn it! No matter, at least now I can settle my score with you, Gebohq.

Qhobeg: Huh?

Will Evil Gebohq find out Qhobeg is not really the real Gebohq? What will Qhobeg do? Are there REALLY seven Gebohqs floating around, here on the Never-ending Story Thread? Now THAT would be pretty scary...
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-03-17, 7:45 AM #125
Geb is wandering around the creepy underground complex (which is also haunted) beneath a haunted house (which is also creepy), when he hears a bloodcurdling scream.

Bloodcurdling Scream: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Geb: Huh?

Suddenly TLTE bursts out of the shadows, running past Geb at hyperspeed.

Geb: Huh. I wonder what that was all about.

He keeps walking along the wall when suddenly a horrific monster comes out of shadows in front of him. It is all fangs and claws, red eyes and bloodstained teeth-

Geb: Ewwww, bloodstained teeth!? Brush sometimes, willya?

Uh, Geb-

Geb: *begins to lecture the monster on the virtues of good teethbrushing like the poster child he is* -prevent plaque buildup...

Meanwhile, the monster stops and appears to be listening attentively.

Monster: Garoff?

Geb: Yes, indeedy, I like the mint flavor paste too.

Geb?

Geb: And the plain gel is - What IS it, Narrator?

You do realize that you're lecturing a 20 ft tall, 100 ft long monster with 18 heads, a scorpion's tail, and pincers?

Geb: Huh? *takes a good, hard look into the shadows* ...

-----

TLTE is running down the creepy underground passageway (which is also haunted) beneath the haunted house (which is also creepy), when he stops to catch his breath.

TLTE: *panting* Uh, uh, uh... I wonder if I lost it.

Suddenly, he hears a bloodcurdling scream not unlike the one he uttered a few minutes ago.

Bloodcurdling Scream: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Moments later, Geb bursts out of the shadows, gebbing at full tilt beyond TLTE.

TLTE: Well, it looks like it's time to join the rat race again.

Rat: Hey! I resent that language!

TLTE: But- *hears the monster roaring down the passageway* Nevermind. *TLTEs it*

REMINDER: As we know from NeShattered, TLTEing consists of producing clones of oneself.

TLTE: *to clones* You... must sacrifice yourselves for me. *runs off* You will be rewarded in Heavennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn- *as he falls down a deep chasm*

The TLTE clones look at each other, then geb it themselves, but are careful to leap OVER the chasm TLTE fell into.

-----

Geb: *huffing and puffing a couple hundred miles down the passageway* Doesn't this creepy underground hallway (which is also haunted) EVER end?

Better hope not, Geb, cuz that monster's only seconds behind you.

Geb: WHAT?

Suddenly, the monster with 18 heads, red eyes, bloodstained teeth - well, actually, they're mint-stained now - pincers, and a scorpion's head bursts out of the shadows, running past Geb.

Geb: Huh, that was weird. Wonder what spooked it.

A little belatedly - due to its mental, ah, slowness - the monster lets out a bloodcurdling scream, which, for the sake of space, will not be reproduced here.

Geb: *scrutinizing the shadows* Er, hello?

Suddenly, a wind bursts through the chamber, as wild and frenzied as a hurricane. Streams of fire scorch down the passageway, barely missing Geb, and then-

All is silent. Not even a rustling can be heard. For a few moments there is no sound. Then soft footsteps become audible in the blackness. Out of the dark comes a figure, standing at 7 feet in height, with a dark blue robe and hood covering his face in an ebony silhouette blacker than the depths of evil's heart, and long fingers so pale and gaunt as to be skeletal.

Morthrandur. The Sepulchral Phantom.


Morthrandur: Welcome, Gebohq. I've been expecting you.[/b]

-----

TLTE: *collapsed in a heap at the bottom of the chasm he fell into* Owie...

Mysterious Voice: Get up.

TLTE: Huh? Who's there?

Mysterious Voice: I SAID, get UP!

A hand reaches out of the darkness to haul TLTE roughly to his feet.

TLTE: Hey, watch the cool Matrix-type trenchcoat, comrade.

The "comrade" to whom the mysterious voice belongs steps out of the shadows. He is dressed in metal plate armor, with a sword of white power hanging at his belt, and a hooded black cape flowing from his shoulders. Despite his new attire, the black hair and royal blue eyes mark this new arrival definitively as-

TLTE: Highemperor?!

Highemp: In the flesh. Well, sort of.

TLTE: I thought you were DEAD.

Highemp: *regarding him coolly* I WAS dead - well at least insofar as you define death. But you're supposed to be dead, too. Absolver's saving your life saved the NeS - but it also created a paradox. The dead now walk.

TLTE looks somewhat timidly around, as though expecting to see flesh-eating ghouls appear at any time.

Highemp: *shaking his head* No, old friend, you, you and I, we are the dead that walk. When you were killed, reality shifted to heal itself of this paradox - where both answer and question had reassembled themselves in the Shattered NeS, now only the answer existed - in the form of you. But there can be no answers with a question - in the form of myself.

REMINDER: This is referring to TLTE's first post on NeShattered, where Highemperor is called the Questioner, and TLTE is called the Answerer.

TLTE: Hmmm. . . so you're saying that reality healed this paradox by resurrecting you?

Highemp: Quite. *a faraway look of extreme tiredness appears in his eyes as his face sags* I am tired, TLTE. So tired. I merely, dearly, wish to return to my slumber.

TLTE: *bracing himself* So why not just kill me? That would allow you to return to Heaven as well, would it not?

Highemp: Yes... and don't think for a moment I haven't considered it. Yet, through the Sepulchral Phantom's scheming, your existence became inextricably tied to that of the Neverending Story. No one can kill you unless they also wish to destroy the NeS.

TLTE: I'm surprised you even care.

Highemp: *his look hardens* I don't. But... once, a long time ago, a man named Geb called me friend. It is for his sake that I do not strike you down.

TLTE: *nods* Then I shall help you, Highemperor. I shall help you find a way to return to your sleep of death.

-----

Meanwhile, a couple hundred miles away, in the creepy underground passageway (which is also haunted), Gebohq faces down the Sepulchral Phantom.

Gebohq: What do you want?

Morthrandur: *spreading its hands* The same thing you want. To sustain the truth, the good, within us for all eternity.

Geb: What do you mean?

Morthrandur: It's quite simple, Gebohq. Everyone has a legacy that they wish to leave behind, through which all that was good and true in them may live on forever, dying without loss.

Geb: *breathing softly* The NeS.

Morthrandur: Yes.

Geb: You're saying you want to PRESERVE the NeS? Then why have you been trying to KILL it!

Morthrandur: Come with me.[/b]

The Sepulchral Phantom walks down the hallway, seeming almost to float about the ground. Torches light themselves as he walks by, illuminating the path for Geb. After a moment's hesitation, Geb follows.

They walk deeper and deeper, until they are no longer within what can truly be called the planet Earth anymore, but have passed through a portal to another realm.


Morthrandur: Behold. My kingdom.

Geb: Whoa...

All around them, light shines. It is the brightest, the purest, the most intense light Geb has ever seen. And yet it illuminates; it does not blind. It sears through the Sepulchral Phantom's robes, and in a dazzling display of fireworks, Morthrandur's robes disintegrate, and his body turns to androgynous golden light, with a miasma of star-filled mist covering his vitals. Geb stares at him, awestruck, wondering what his face looks like, for Morthrandur's own glow obscures it.

Morthrandur: You approve?

Even his voice is changed somehow, as though instead of being dark and foreboding, it is triumphant and righteous. Or perhaps it was always that way, but without the shining light it was impossible to tell.

Geb: This is. . . amazing - Losien!

He sees Losien running up the hill to him, and he hugs his sister tightly.

Losien: Hello, Geb.

Geb: Hey, sis!

Morthrandur: This is my future, the future that awaits all things, including the Neverending, your story thread. But only if one lets himself see it.[/b]

Geb: What - what do you mean?

Morthrandur: I have "attacked" you, as you put it, and tried to "kill" the NeS, only to strengthen you. It has worked, has it not? Your legacy springs eternal, Gebohq, and it has touched the hearts and minds of so many about you. That is the greatest blessing one can ever receive and hope to give.[/b]

Geb: Yeah, but what does that have to do with anything, other than assuring me that the NeS will never die, which I already knew anyway?

Morthrandur: Because the NeS is not MEANT to never die. Life, death - these are only the beginning of eternity, and you stunt your legacy's growth if you never let it die.[/b]

Suddenly, the light disappears, the rolling hills of gold vanish, and Morthrandur is back in the cloaked, pale form of the Sepulchral Phantom in a cave lit my flickering torches.

Geb: Hey! What happened?

Morthrandur: *laughing almost melodiously* Gebohq, here is the key. You are a passionate soul. You were always meant to be. But everyone must surrender to a greater passion - the passion of what they truly believe.[/b]

Geb: So what does this have to do with me?

Morthrandur: Quite simple, Gebohq. You are a follower of the WriterGod. You work HIS will, not your own. Remember that, as I strengthen you. But do not tell anyone of our meeting.[/b]

Geb: Strengthen? You mean attack? You're going to attack us again?!

The Sepulchral Phantom fades away, and Geb is left in the flickering torchlight.

Geb: Of all the rotten luck... *gebs it to the nearest exit*

------------------
Visit my all-new website, the Lazarus Citadel[/url!
Visit my all-new website, the [url=http://com3.runboard.com/blazaruscitadel]Lazarus Citadel[/url!
2004-03-18, 8:01 AM #126
*In the Evil Hall of Heroes, Evil-Reverse Gebohq prepares to do away with Qhobeg, believing him to be the authentic good-guy Gebohq.*

Evil Geb: (drawing a pistol) "See you in hell, Gebohq!"

*Suddenly, the door is kicked in by two uniformed officers! They aim their guns at Evil Geb.*

Officer: "Drop it, Sanity Police!"

Evil Geb: "Who?"

Sanity Officer: "We're with the Sanity Police, and you sir are under arrest."

Evil Geb: "What?"

Sanity Officer #2: "We do have a warrant, if that's your concern."

Qhobeg: "What?"

Sanity Officer: "No need to worry, Quho-Qu-Qhuoa-Queuy..."

*The two Gebs wait as the Sanity Cop figures out how to pronounce "Qhobeg".*

Sanity Officer: "...uh, Queue-bag."

Sanity Officer #2: "You see? This kind of thing is exactly what's wrong with the world. People with unspeakable names strolling around like they own the place...even with just one of you it was pushing the limit, but we were willing to turn the other cheek until this 'Seven Gebs' nonsense started cropping up."

*Schemes begin to perkolate in Evil Geb's mind.*

Evil Geb: "Seven, eh?"

Sanity Officer: "Yes, well, regardless, we're taking both of you into custody. So please lower your firearm and allow my partner to apply the handcuffs."

Evil Geb: "I don't think so! (to Qhobeg) I'll sort you out later, scum."

*Evil Geb Gebs it.*

Sanity Officer #2: "...That alone is cause enough to lock you up forever. Honestly, what effect does it have? Are we supposed to be dazzled by your feats of amazingness?"

*The other Sanity Cop slaps the cuffs on Evil Geb and Qhobeg, and the four leave the Hall of Evil Heroes.*

Sanity Officer #2: "I mean, I could understand if there was a cloud of smoke, or a blinding flash, or something - anything, really - but you just expect people to become totally disoriented whenever you 'Geb' it."

Qhobeg: "Could we stop at a donut shop?"

Sanity Officer: "No, sorry. We're on a tight schedule - got to round up some fellow calling himself the Sepuch, um..."

Sanity Officer #2: "You see what I'm talking about?"

Sanity Officer: "...Sepchurchical..."

Qhobeg: "I didn't realize the situation was that bad."

Sanity Officer: "Septic?"

Sanity Officer #2: "Believe it."

Sanity Officer: "...uh, calling himself THE PHANTOM."

*Lightening crashes.*

Not meanwhile, The Last True Evil pulls out his boomstick and watches the shadows play around him.

HighEmperor: "Hey, you aren't listening."

TLTE: "Not now. The dead walk."

HighEmperor: "Didn't you hear my heartwrenching and overly-serious speech?"

TLTE: "Gimmie some sugar!"

*TLTE unloads his shotgun on a zombified TwistedSpasm, the pellets shredding the undead monster.*

TLTE: "Groovy."

HighEmperor: "No! Listen! I need you to help me return to the land of the dead!"

TLTE: "Quiet down! There's deadites. And they're evil."

*TLTE begins his hunt for the Evil Dead, leaving HighEmperor alone in the scary chasm.*

------------------
Shut up. I'm GOING to do this whether you like it or not.

[This message has been edited by Tracer (edited March 18, 2004).]
COUCHMAN IS BACK BABY
2004-03-18, 4:23 PM #127
Back with the Sanity Cops...

SC1: You, Evil Geb, in the car...

They lower Evil Geb into the back of the car then turn to do the same with Qhobeg only to find him gone and the 2 of them handcuffed together

SC2: I hate it when this happens...

SC1: Yeah... first that Cthulhu guy now this...

Meanwhile back at the normal HoH...

Qhobeg: oh good the game is still on... i'm glad i paused when i did...

Qhobeg continues his game of Mario Kart

------------------
wang is within all
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2004-03-19, 4:11 AM #128
*MEANWHILE, IN THE 'REAL' WORLD...*

GebohqtheWriter: Think of the looove! THE LOOOOVE-

*He is cut down in a rapid crossfire that is rapidly enveloping the NeS Offices. True to form, most of our beloved staff are either too lazy, boozed up or busy playing computer games to notice. But those who care about more than their doughnut supplies, T1 connections and clouded sex lives are rapidly caught up in the escalating situation.*

HighemperortheWriter: I swear by the sacred Rite of Azermaniroth, Keeper of the Third Lunar Jewel, I will end your inane story arcs!

*Arrayed in a sweeping cape that appears to be made out of tea towels, and screaming in a deity-like squeak, HighemperortheWriter has barricaded himself at one end of the office block, throwing cardboard cut-outs of lightning bolts down the hall at...*

TracertheWriter: Flibbledy-dibbledy! Nyaaaaaaaahhh! Silly story arcs forever!!!!

*Entrenched in a fortress entirely composed of paperclips, TracertheWriter dodges the faux bolts of wrath and returns fire with an equally deadly weapon he has surrounded himself with; a limitless supply of codfish.*

TracertheWriter: I'm on a holy quest to restore zaniness to the NeS! Booga-booga!

HighemperortheWriter: Zounds! Such stark evil requires me to draw on my Highemperor-invincibility! EXECUTE POWERPLAY ATTACK!

*A stack of A4 paper with 'LoLOLOLOL I'm better than j00' flies down the hall, smashing itself and exploding on the paperclip shield. A volley of codfish fire in counter, slopping wetly down HighemperortheWriter's cubicle.*

GebohqtheWriter: Ugggghhhh...help me...

*TLTEtheWriter runs through the barrage, leaning by his fellow author. Geb has fallen bravely defending, as always, the interests of his story. A lightning bolt hangs from his ear; many codfish grimly decorate his chest.*

TLTETW: What would you have me do, my goofy captain?

GebTW: Stop...the chaos...

*TLTETW nods grimly, standing up. As if on cue, TracerTW and HighemperorTW rise up, weapons in hand.*

HighemperorTW: Join me, TLTE! We're both serious writers! Together, we'll turn the NeS into The Sombre Chronicles of the Sepulchral Phantom...people will love it, I swear!

TracerTW: Join me, TLTE! You can only redeem your past serious storylines, and your subsequent role in the rise of the EeP, by zanifying the NeS once more! Here, have a bucket of codfish!

*TLTETW looks left and right, the parallels of writing styles offering him a slice of eternity each.*

Serious...quirky.

Thrilling...humourous.

Intense...light-hearted.

Ultimate power...unlimited codfish.


*His soul bending with the pressure, TLTETW does the only sane thing he can do in the situation.*

TLTETW: I'LL OFFER MYSELF UP AS SACRIFICE!!!

*He runs over to the glass window and jumps through it, braving a 100-foot drop into the official NeS Jelly Swimming Pool. HighempTW and TracerTW both walk to the blasted window, looking down in awe.*

HighemperorTW: By the Wings of Hualestria!

TracerTW: I can't believe he turned down the codfish.

*BACK IN THE REALM OF THE NES!!!*

*TLTE stops, staring blankly ahead, bolt upright. Highemperor looks at him oddly.*

Highemperor: Are you alright?

TLTE: (relaxing) Yeah, my writer has bailed on me again. Let's keep moving...

No codfish were hurt in the making of this post, though some were heard to groan at their excessive use in every punchline.

[This message has been edited by The Last True Evil (edited March 19, 2004).]
The Last True Evil - consistent nobody in the Discussion Forum since 1998
2004-03-19, 9:47 AM #129
Meanwhile, in the office, CM sits in the middle of the office. Suddenly, CM stands up in fury.

CMTheWriter: WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT THE HELL UP? I'M TRYING TO MAKE A POST FOR SUBARU HERE!

At the same time, flames erupt behind CM, for dramatic effect

All: Wohhhhh.....

GebTW: How'd you do those flames?

CMTW: What flames? AHH! FIRE!!!!

Having forgot to put a heatsink on his new webserver, the computer had erupted in flames, catching the entire cubicle on fire.

CMTW: OMIGOD!!!! SOMEONE SAVE ME!!!!

Wai: Don't worry CM, I'll save you!

CMTW: Oh thank good... wait... YOUR A CHARACTER IN NES! HOW CAN YOU BE HERE?!

Wai: When I say wandering, I mean wandering. Now, you want to burn to death or what?

The fire had already consumed the walls to CMTW's cubicle, and was now spreading outwards. The only thing still keeping CMTW from catching on fire was his Tuna Ham Turkey Raw Beef sandwich, which is literally disgusting enough to ward off the devil.

CMTW: Oh, right. Sure!

Wai yanks the keg of water off of the water dispenser, and attaches it as fuel to his flamethrower. He then sprays the flames with the water, and puts it out.

CMTW: *sniffle* MY SERVER!!! NOOOOOO!!!!

CMTW kneels down to a scorched-black case, with oozing silicon and PCB pouring out the front and back. He cries, and hugs it tightly...

CMTW: My poor baby... many a website we've hosted together... why... why did you have to go? Not like this!!!!

TracerTW: I thought that thing was some piece of junk you picked up off the corner of your street.

CMTW: But it wasn't just any piece of junk, it was MY piece of junk! I'll never have another one like it!

TracerTW: Well think of it this way, it's probably worth more now that it is melted down to its component materials.

CMTW: Oh, that's right. Oh well.

CM stops crying, gets up and kicks the case over.

CMTW: That's right you smoldering pile of poo, you're going to the recycling factory! Well, Wai, thanks for your... Wai?

Wai appears to have disappeared, just as he appeared. Who knows where he is wandering now... And now back to our regularly scheduled NeS...

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net
2004-03-19, 1:10 PM #130
Then... suddenly as if from no where the door marked "Authorzied Personnel Only" opens and Cthulhu pops his head out...

Cthulhu: WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE!?!?!

All: uhm....

CMtW: How can you be here? you're... WTF is going on???

Cthulhu realizes he is talking to the writers and pops back into wherever he was and closes the door

TracertW: what is behind that door...

Jim7tW reaches for the door and opens it only to find a strange portal... he steps into the portal and falls to the ground

Jim7tW: ouch...

Jim7tW stand up only to find himself in the remains of The Arena

OMG ONE OF THE WRITERS HAS FOUND HIS WAY INTO THE NES... WILL HE FIND A WAY OUT? WILL HE BE STUCK IN THE NES FOREVER? WILL HE NOT WATCH HIS STEP AND GET STUCK IN THE PLOTHOLE? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON WHEEL... OF... FORTUNE!!!

------------------
wang is within all
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2004-03-19, 6:09 PM #131
Meanwhile in the Hall of Heroes, Noble Outlaw the Writer suddenly materializes behind Qhobeg.

NOtW: Hello, Qhobeg. It is I, Noble Outlaw.

Qhobeg: Hi, how yah... wait, aren't you one of the writers? What are you doing here?

NOtW: I am not here in the flesh. This is simply a hologram. I have come in this way to impart on you information of great... wait, is that mario kart?

Qhobeg: Sure is.

NOtW: Then i'm getting in on this. Prepare to be beaten!

Qhobeg: Don't count on it. I've been getting good at this.

And so, important information forgotten, Noble and Qhobeg begin to play mario kart

------------------
"No good can ever come from staying with normal people"
-Outlaw Star
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul"
-Tycho, Penny Arcade
"I'm a Cannabal-Vegitarian. I will BBQ an employee if there is no veggie option"
-DX:IW

[This message has been edited by Noble Outlaw (edited March 19, 2004).]
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
The Never Ending Story²
"I consume the life essence itself!... Preferably medium rare" - Mauldis

-----@%
2004-03-21, 3:44 AM #132
We return to Cool Matty and Qwerty's adventure through the wilderness, where they seem to have stumbled upon something...

CM: Whoops! Ow!

And of course, CM quite literally stumbles on something...

CM: Oh... ow... my head... jeez, what the hell was that?

Qwerty: It seems you tripped over a fallen sign... it reads... "Ahead: The Haunted House of Unexplained Overly Disgusting Enviromentally Safe Ghouls"

CM: Enviromentally safe Ghouls? Sounds frightening..

Qwerty: Without doubt. We should go around it.

CM: But don't you see? We were meant to go there! How else could we stumble upon such a find?

Qwerty: Because we are unlucky?

CM: You have no faith!

Qwerty: I thought that was obvious, I am a scientist.

CM: Meh.

Voice(far away): AHHHHH!!!!!!

CM: Woh... who was that?

Qwerty: Sounded like someone in trouble!

Voice(far away): Don't hurt me! I'll give you a donut!

CM: Wait a second... THAT'S GEB!

Qwerty: Who?

CM: The dude I was talking about! The one I am GONNA KILL IF I GET MY HANDS ON HIM... COM'ON!

CM and Qwerty take off for the haunted house, where the voices came from. They soon arrive at the house, and walk in.

Qwerty: *cough* Kind of dusty in here! Don't they know of sterilization, or something?

CM: Shutup. I need to find Gebohq...

Suddenly a loud scream draws nearer, and nearer, and nearer... and finally, out pops Gebohq from a door, running across the hall to the other side, with some sort of huge monster behind him.

CM: There he goes! Get him!!!

CM takes off, and Qwerty, after deciding that he had nothing to lose, followed. Cue classic hallway chase scene from Scooby Doo.

Geb: AHHHH!!!!!

Monster: MORE DONUTS!!!! MOOOOORE DONUTS!!!

CM: GEBOHQ, GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE SO I CAN BLOW THE LIVING SNOT OUT OF YOU!

Qwerty: Wait for me! I'm no athlete!

Finally, they all run into eachother in the middle of the hallway, and fall over.

All: Ungh! Ow!

CM: Get off of me you freaking monster, Gebohq is mine!

CM gets up, and a ring of flame encompasses him. Without any delay, he proceeds to incinerate the monster.

Gebohq: Thank you CM, he just loved those donuts! I told him I already ate the rest of the box, but the thing wouldn't listen. You can't just get fresh donuts like that at all times of the day!

CM: Shut. Up.

Geb: What are you so upset about?

CM: You, Geb. YOU. Mimiru, she's dead! I looked for her, and tried to find her. I COULDN'T. You know why? BECAUSE SHE'S DEAD. You know why she's dead? BECAUSE YOU HAD TO GO ON THAT ESCAPADE OF YOURS, AND TAKE EVERYONE ELSE WITH YOU. You don't think about everyone else when you warp us all over, and change the story. You just do it! You say its for the betterment of NeS, or it's for comedy relief. No way. In reality, your a cold-blooded killer. So how many other people you going to kill with your pointless story games?

Geb: But CM... she's...I...

CM: SILENCE, GEBOHQ! Flames surround CM for dramatic effect

Geb: If I knew this would upset you so much, CM, I wouldn't ...

CM: Wouldn't have WHAT, Geb? Killed Mimiru? No Geb, there is no turning back now. I won't let you get away with this. You understand me?

Geb: But... she's really not...

CM: Your time ends here, Geb. I'm sick of it, and I won't let you kill anyone else. Screw the EvilGeb and such, it is YOU that is the evil one. For all I know, they're just a ploy! A coverup!

Geb: If they were ploys, they'd be making more donu...

CM: No more talking, Geb. You die, now.

CM lifts his staff to the air, and casts fireball. A fireball shoots out from CM's other hand, and hits Geb squarely in the chest, throwing him against a wall.

Geb: Ow! CM, cut it out! Won't you talk about this?

CM: Too late for talk, Geb. You didn't give Mimiru a chance to "talk".

Suddenly, footsteps are heard. One of the doors in the hallway opens to reveal...

TLTE: Gotta find deadites, com'on deadites! My guns hunger for flesh! Bwahahahahaa! Woh, hello!

Geb: TLTE! Hey! I was wondering where you ...

CM: Shut up! Both of you! No more interruptions!

CM casts flame, which ignites Geb's shirt on fire.

Geb: HEY! THAT HURTS! Geb tosses off his shirt, revealing a perfectly toned body, something a woman would DIE for.

TLTE: Dang, Geb. You been working out?

Geb: Nah. When I say "controlling NeS", I mean it. Why not get a little something out of it for myself, you know?

TLTE: Makes sense. Should have let me in on it, I'd given you something worthwhile!

Geb: What, like a Gamecube?

TLTE: I thought you already had one!

Geb: 2 is better than one! Well what about donuts?

TLTE: No, not donuts either...

Geb: Then what could possibly be of any worth to me?

TLTE: Cash?

Geb: Psh, who needs cash?

CM: Dammit, both of you, JUST. SHUT. UP!

Flames grow larger around CM

TLTE: Wow... what's got you all upset?

CM: He killed Mimiru! And now he's gonna die for it!

CM starts casting another spell, but suddenly, realizing the danger Geb is in, TLTE pulls out a pistol.

TLTE: Don't do it, CM. This isn't the way to take care of this situation...

CM: Stuff it. You can't hurt me.

He continues casting his spell. TLTE, however, doesn't bluff. He fires the pistol at CM. CM stops casting, and the flames surround CM. The bullet hits the flames, and instantly incinerates into ash.

TLTE: There's no way! That's a silver bullet too! Why you little...

TLTE runs at CM, preparing to do a linebacker tackle. CM just raises his hand, and throws TLTE back against the wall with amazing force, simply with telekinetic ability. Right after this, Highemp walks in another door.

Highemp: Dammit TLTE! Come here and help me! Oh... wait... what is going on here?

CM: I'm trying to kill Geb here, for killing Mimiru! Now will everyone STOP INTERRUPTING ALREADY?

CM pulls out his rusty dagger, stained with blood. He proceeds to walk over to Gebohq.

TLTE: That's it. Lets see him block THIS.

TLTE pulls out a double-barrel shotgun, and loads it with explosive shells.

TLTE: This baby will blow apart a rhino at 20 paces!

Highemp, realizing the true nature of the situation, puts his hand on TLTE's gun, lowering it.

TLTE: What are you doing? I gotta take him down, he's going to kill Geb!

Highemp: Don't interfere. This needs to happen, and I don't think you, or me could stop it.

CM: Say goodbye to NeS!

CM raises his dagger above Geb, and begins to bring it down to Geb's defenseless chest.

CM: THIS IS FOR MIMIRU!

Suddenly, a different door bursts open...

Mimiru: CM!

CM flinches for a second... but continues to drive it down.

Mimiru: Tsukasa!!!! What are you doing?! STOP!

CM stops an inch from Geb's chest. Sweat rolls down Geb's cheek. CM slowly turns around, to confirm suspicions that were floating around in his head...

CM: Mimiru?

Mimiru: How... how could you possibly... want to kill Geb?

CM: I thought... I thought he killed you!

Mimiru: Did you even ask? Did you LOOK for me?

CM: Of course I looked!

Qwerty(Silent until now): CM, no you didn't. You always assumed she was dead...

CM: But...

Mimiru: And you never asked Geb... he found me earlier... and we split to find a way out of this place... but as usual... you don't think things through!

CM: But... I didn't mean...

Mimiru: I don't care! I don't want to see your face again, CM! You hear me?

Mimiru takes off for the door out of the building. CM quickly follows in pursuit.

CM: Mimiru, please! Wait!

Mimiru, tears flowing from her eyes, busts out of the door, and runs into the forest. CM stops at the door, realizing what he had done.

CM: How... how could I be so stupid! STUPID!!!!

CM takes off into the forest also, in a different direction.

TLTE: Well... that was different...

Geb: So... anyone for some donuts?

Qwerty: You were out of them earlier!

Geb: Shhh... I always keep donuts on hand for emergencies!

Qwerty: And the monster wasn't an emergency?

Geb: Oh, right. Oh well. Donuts for everyone!

TLTE,Highemp,Qwerty,andGeb: YAY!!!

What will happen to Mimiru and CM? Is the haunted house finally finished? Where are the rest of the heroes? Find out next time!

NSP: Please don't post for Mimiru or CM, thanks.

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net
2004-03-21, 10:49 AM #133
NSP: Hmm… seemed to have developed a small plothole. Better get out my plotdivot replacement mix.

About two hours earlier, Qwerty and CM were at their makeshift camp, hastily packing to get out of the area before the robots arrived. Qwerty is fiddling with is monitor, as usual.

Qwerty: Where do you want to go? I’ve got pictures in here for all around.

CM: Just pick one. We've got to get out of here.

Qwerty: *sigh* Very well. Random it is

He punches a few buttons and the screen resolves into an image of... trees. just trees.

Qwerty: Here you go. One random surroundings picture.

CM: But that's just trees. How will we know where we've gone?

Qwerty: Hey, you asked for random, you got random.

CM: Alright, i guess it will have to do. Let’s go.

Qwerty: Wait just one second. have to set up a little surprise.

Qwerty rummages in his pack and takes out a small disk. he puts in under the ashes of the failed campfire.

CM: What's that?

Qwerty: A proximity mine. Let’s get out of here before it turns on.

The two disappear as CM teleports. A few minutes later, Ahnuld and Thrawn42689 reach the campsite.

Ahnuld: hey, look! It’s their ca-

*KABLAM*

CM and Qwerty appear in a small grove. once again, CM is rather wasted after the teleport, and takes a nap. Qwerty, not wanting alert the robots to their presence another time, sets up a portable space heater, and sets a few traps from his bag. Within a few minutes, CM wakes up to the small of cooking meat.

CM: Ah, thank god. No more of those blasted 'energy bars'. what type of meat is that?

Qwerty: Um, meat. Just eat it.

CM: Well, i need my strength. I guess I’ll have to choke it down. Hmm... since we have some time, and those robots shouldn't be able to find us, you want me to teach you some magic? Maybe then you'll quit bugging me about it.

Qwerty: Sounds good. Let’s get started.

CM then continues to attempt to teach Qwerty. After about an hour or so, Qwerty manages to make a small spell. He is able to use electricity, and so this spell results in a shock to CM.

CM: Ack! Hey, that hurt! I think that's enough for now. You've gotten the basics. Lets get moving. I don't want to take any chances as far as those robots are concerned.

Qwerty: Very well. Let me just pack up my stuff.

The two figures move almost silently though the forest. However, after about an hour, CM stumbles on something.

CM: Whoops! Ow!

And so we come to the present.[/b]


------------------
"No good can ever come from staying with normal people"
-Outlaw Star
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul"
-Tycho, Penny Arcade
"I'm a Cannabal-Vegitarian. I will BBQ an employee if there is no veggie option"
-DX:IW
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
The Never Ending Story²
"I consume the life essence itself!... Preferably medium rare" - Mauldis

-----@%
2004-03-21, 9:20 PM #134
TLTE: So what are we going to do now?

Gebohq: Well, in the absence of CM to teleport us out of here, I say we negotiate the haunted house and cleanse it of demons.

Highemperor: You're thinking of what I'm thinking, aren't you?

Gebohq: Yes. A creaky old house...dilapidated, in the middle of nowhere...very creaky...filled with demons...

Highemperor: The PERFECT location for a new NeS Headquarters.

*The two of them don priestly gowns, chew on garlic and move on to the next room eagerly. Qwerty moves to follow, but notices TLTE standing motionless, his fists clenched to white balls, a fine smoke pouring from his ears, his face red with transparent fury.*

Qwerty: Er....are you all right, buddy?

TLTE: I...hate...wizards.

Qwerty: What? Wh-

TLTE: ALWAYS throwing other people around with telekinetic ability, dousing people in mystical flames...it's...it's like they think they're so much BETTER than everyone else!

Qwerty: Well...uh...I guess they kinda are, aren't they?

*His face now a delicate shade of violet, TLTE turns to Qwerty, in a grim parody of politeness.*

TLTE: whyuhseh?

Qwerty: Huh?

TLTE: whyuhseh?

Qwerty: I didn't g-

TLTE: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?

*Qwerty recoils in the face of TLTE's impotent rage. The aggrieved Russian spy rubs his temples, regaining his natural colour.*

TLTE: I've had enough of this, I really have. Every story arc I've been in, there's always some smart-arse magician who clicks his fingers and throws me ten miles, or blinks and incinerates my overcoat...NO more.

Qwerty: Well I mean...I share your concern, but there's really bugger-all we can do about it, isn't there?

TLTE: Says you. No, with you as my witness, this day brings a new chapter to the TLTE saga - spy, swordsman, fiancee of Losien, waffle-maker and-

*He quickly removes his overcoat and scribbles something on the back, in indelible ink.*

TLTE: -"Wizard Hunter".

Zounds! Get going, Gandalf! Move away, Merlin! Pack your bags, Prospero! TLTE has had quite enough, apparently! Will this change his relationship with magic-users in the group? Will the haunted mansion indeed be used as the next NeS headquarters? Questions, questions...find out (hopefully) in the next edition of NeSquared!
The Last True Evil - consistent nobody in the Discussion Forum since 1998
2004-03-22, 3:54 PM #135
Inside the mind of Qwerty.

Qwerty: Damn it! Why did i have to learn magic now? I guess i'll just have to keep it under wraps for now. Its not like i know too much of it and this guy looks like way more then a match for me.

Some interesting developments indeed! Qwerty, now within the camp of the enemy, so to speak. What will happen? Will he be found out? Will Gebohq and Highemperor feel the wrath of TLTE? Find out next time in NeSquared!

------------------
"No good can ever come from staying with normal people"
-Outlaw Star
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul"
-Tycho, Penny Arcade
"I'm a Cannabal-Vegitarian. I will BBQ an employee if there is no veggie option"
-DX:IW
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
The Never Ending Story²
"I consume the life essence itself!... Preferably medium rare" - Mauldis

-----@%
2004-03-22, 4:59 PM #136
NSP: I come bearing images. I'm not joining in as I am waaaaay not into it. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/tongue.gif]

[http://www.oscempire.net/images/NeS/uncreative.jpg]
[http://www.oscempire.net/images/NeS/nesbut1.jpg]
[http://www.oscempire.net/images/NeS/nesbut2.jpg]
[http://www.oscempire.net/images/NeS/neslongbut.jpg]

Nothing spectacular, but I'm rather uninspired as of the moment. Perhaps if somebody would email me with some concept images I could do something better. I'll do more when something comes to mind. The NeSI is really hard to draw from. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/frown.gif]


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-=I'm the wang of this here site, and it's HUGE! So just imagine how big I am.=-
1337Yectiwan
OSC Returns!!
10 of 14 -- 27 Lives On
-=I'm the wang of this here site, and it's HUGE! So just imagine how big I am.=-
1337Yectiwan
The OSC Empire
10 of 14 -- 27 Lives On
2004-03-23, 2:25 PM #137
(NSP: I'm posting this for Highemperor, who wrote this post. I made a few alterations, but nothing major. I find it an entertaining flashback-y type tiny tale anyways.)

Austria, A.D. 1888.

A lonely castle stands upon a desolate mountain crag, just waiting to be explored by the words and jabs of myself, the Storyteller, ancestor to the Narrator. A single man banging coconut halves together rides up the overgrown path to the castle. He bears a strong resemblance to a certain Gebohq, with copper hair which flows to his shoulders.

He is none other than Erro Ohq II, founder of the League of Heroes and unsung hero himself.


Erro: *panting* Whew! Screw the Monty Python-like low budget, I'm gonna get an actual horse next time I go up this hill!

Yes, friends, this is the incredible, the amazing, the absolutely fearless daredevil who-

Erro: AAAAGGGHHHHHH, AAAGGGHHHH! It bit me! Gerroff, geritoff! *swats at the flea that bit him*

Yes, ahem. We now turn our attention to a peak not too far distant, where the rest of the League of Heroes rides their horses, waiting for Erro's signal.

The Thirteenth True Evil (T13TE): Hmm. It appears Comrade Erro is in trouble.

Badger: Is that the signal?

King Emp (king of the country of Armenia): No, but it will serve as a distraction that we can use as a cover to get in.

T13TE: But who will protect Comrade Erro?

King Emp: *voice grim* I will. *brandishes his longbow*

T13TE: Ah, of course, Comrade King.

King Emp: I told you, it's not "comrade", it's "your majesty".

T13TE: OK, Comrade.

King Emp: *sigh* Just go already.

Badger: Come on, T13TE!

As they ride down the hill, King Emp watches them momentarily, then turns his attention back to the distant figure of Erro Ohq II, who is vainly trying to kill the flea the bit him.

Erro: Yowza! It bit me again!

Suddenly, an arrow goes whizzing by his ear, nailing the flea to a tree. Erro turns to see King Emp on that far away peak, saluting him. But when he turns back around, it is with a groan.

Erro: *with a groan* Swell, just my luck.

Two bulky men in heavy plate armor with batlike wings and spiralled horns stand before him.

Bulky Man #1: Prepare to meet your maker.

Erro knows King Emp's arrows don't have a chance of penetrating their armor, and so flinches, closing his eyes as he prepares for the inevitable killing blow. Instead, he finds himself being hoisted up by the arms, one bulky man on each arm, and taken towards the castle.

Erro: Where. . . where are you taking me?

Bulky Man #2: We just told you. To meet your maker. . .

---------------

8th dimension, Haunted House, A.D. 2004.

Highemp: *taking the garlic out of his mouth* By the hoary hosts of Hoggoth! The things TLTEtW will make me do!

Geb: "Hoary hosts of Hoggoth"?

Highemp: *knowingly* Means "Silver beard of some guy named Hoggoth". Just imitating TLTEtW's redition of me.

Geb: Ah. So what now?

Highemp: We get rid of the demons, I suppose. This really WOULD be a cool Hall of Heroes.

They set about their work, killing demons left and right. As a pair, they are unmatched in skill, unrequited in bravery, and unhinged in sanity.

Highemp: There, that should be the last of them.

Geb: *peeking out of closet* Is it safe to come out now?

Highemp: Safer than it is in there. What do you think those red eyes behind you are?

Geb: Yowza! *darts out of the closet*

Oh, dear! A monster in the closet! A new hall of heroes in the 8th dimension! What will happen next? Find out next time on the Neverending Story Squa-

Voice: Wait.

What? Who dares interrupt me?

Voice: I do.

A figure steps out of the shadows. It is an older man wearing a tophat, who bears a certain resemblance to...

Highemp: Who are you?

Old man: I am Mustang.

Geb: Mustang?

Mustang: Well, horses came before cars, didn't they?

Geb: I thought Mustang was a car...

Highemp: Are you saying you're the ancestor of Ford?

Mustang: Indeed, you recognize the lineage. Though my knowledge of magic, I have slowed the aging process, perhaps at a cost too high... Though I am now past my prime, I was in the fullness of my strength back in the year 1888.

Geb: Why are you coming to us?

Mustang: I wish to tell you what happened that year, in Austria, 1888.

Geb: A message, then?

Mustang: ... yes.

And so Mustang begins telling them the story of the League of Heroes, and their storming of Castle Desmond all those decades ago...

--------------------

Austria, Castle Desmond, 1888.

Erro: *flanked by two guards* So, Count Desmond, you're the one behind all the attacks.

Desmond: *fiddling with a device on his table* Very good, Ohq. Your insight serves you well. Tell me - *he holds up the device* - do you know what this is?

Erro: Of course. It's a silver nunchukus.

Desmond: Again, Ohq, very good. But this is no ordinary nunchukus. It is Mors Dei - Latin for "death of God". Yes, I see by your shocked expression that you realize what that means. This weapon is capable of killing a deity.

Erro: *in a strained voice* And which deity do you plan on killing, Desmond?

The room suddenly grows very chill as Desmond smiles grimly and replies.

Desmond: All of them.

Erro: Why? What do you hope to gain?

Desmond pauses for a moment. Then he turns to regard Erro Ohq II with a malevolent grin.

Desmond: Ohq. Tell me what you think I am.

Erro: Easy. A vampire, a villain, a slimy piece of worm-ridden filth that will get no such pleasure from me!

One of Desmond's lackeys, a portly man named Lucas, with visions of starships in his head, takes note of that phrase. "Slimy piece of worm-ridden filth" is taken down in his notepad, to be passed on to his great-grandson George someday.

Desmond: True on all counts. Well, except for easy. I think myself a gentleman. Anyways, I'm not QUITE a vampire.

Erro: Then what are?

Desmond: I am NeSferatu.

Erro: Don't you mean nosferatu?

Desmond: No, Ohq, I most definitely mean NeSferatu.

Erro: What is that?

Desmond: Tell me, Ohq, have you ever heard of the Never-ending Story?

Erro: Sure. It's in the prophecies of Nostradamus. An asteroid will come, bearing the incubated seed of a never-ending story. But that's not for another hundred years!

Desmond: A small matter for one of my capabilities and longevity. The point, Ohq, is that I live off the essence - the blood, if you will - of stories - never-ending stories in particular. I need that Never-ending Story in order to survive.

Erro: What does this have to do with us? The rest of the world? I mean, seriously. Killing gods? All these attacks?

Desmond: My assassins are collecting the life force of all those they have killed, for within every person is a potential spark of a story. Is not humanity itself the greatest never-ending story of all?

Erro: So what's your plan?

Desmond: Haha! You hope to stall for time, so your friends will come and save you and stop me, is that it? Very well, I shall humor you. Never-ending stories are the source of my strength. Humanity is the source of neverending stories. And YOU, my dear Ohq, you are the quintessence of humanity. I need merely feed from you, and I shall be triumphant! *turning to the guards* Place him upon the altar.

The guards do so, and Count Desmond, the NeSferatu, prepares to feed upon him, when King Emp rushes in, felling several lackeys with his bow.

King Emp: Not while I still have strength!

Desmond: You shall not have strength for long, my boy! Guards!

Together, Erro and King Emp make short work of the guards. As a pair, they are unmatched in skill, unrequited in bravery, and unhinged in sanity. They turn to face Desmond himself last.

Desmond: Insolent curs! You shall never win!

Lashing out with a bolt of power, he strikes King Emp squarely in the chest, knocking him unconscious to the ground. He did not wake up the rest of the battle, leaving Erro alone to fight the NeSferatu.

When the other heroes get there, Desmond lies dead on the ground, and Erro lies unconscious with King Emp. . . except that Erro is now a very old, old man.


--------------

Geb: Whoa... pretty deep stuff here, Mustang. So what DID happen in that battle?

Mustang: No one knew, except for Erro, and he refused to tell, or even talk about that night again for the rest of his life. He's dead now, though, of course.

Highemp: Interesting. . . Why tell us this now?

Mustang: I have reason to believe that the events of that night will affect us all in days soon to come.

-----

(NSP: Highemperor requests that the writers leave the events of 1888 alone and that he'd like to continue that substory on his own for right now. I'm not a fan of keeping writing to themselves, but that's me.)

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited March 23, 2004).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-03-24, 2:50 PM #138
Nearby, in the forest...

Subaru: I sure wish I knew where I was! This is making me mad! I have a very good sense of geographical location, from my constant traveling, but this forest doesn't even seem recognizable!

Subaru continues walking, and thinks hard about her surroundings. After a few minutes, she stops. She hears someone crying...

Subaru: I wonder who that is? It seems to be coming from the west...

Subaru walks in the direction of the crying...

Subaru: Who's there? Are you alright?

???: Is that you? Subaru?

Subaru: How do you know it's me?

???: It's *sniffle* me, Mimiru...

Subaru: Mimiru! Thank goodness! Why are you crying?

Subaru rushes over to Mimiru, who seems to be a mess. Her clothes are torn from running through the woods, and her makeup is running from all the crying she has been doing.

Mimiru: It... it was Matt...

Subaru: What happened? Did something happen to CM?

Mimiru: ... he ... he almost... *starts to cry*

Subaru: Come on... you can tell me! I'm your best friend, you know that!

Mimiru: ... He... he almost killed Gebohq...

Subaru: What?!

Mimiru: He thought Gebohq had killed me during the warp... and he tried to avenge me by killing him...

Subaru: But that's crazy! Surely someone tried to stop him!

Mimiru: I don't know... I came in only moments before Matt was going to kill him. I called out to him, and just barely saved Geb... but then we got into a fight.

Mimiru: It seems he didn't even look for me, he just assumed I was dead! As if I couldn't take care of myself?

Subaru: Oh come now, you know better than that. CM loves you. Do you think he would take such drastic measures if he didn't love you? He only wanted to protect you, he's said that many, many times.

Mimiru: He is so overprotective though. He must think I'm a weakling!

Subaru: He wouldn't attempt to teach you magic if he thought you were a weakling... even if that did turn out bad...

Mimiru: Oh please! I didn't mean to catch his cloak on fire!

Subaru: There's that smile again! I knew I'd get you happy.

Mimiru: Oh, Subaru... maybe I was wrong about him. But he can make me so mad sometimes, you know?

Subaru: Well the only way to fix it is to talk with him. Where is he?

Mimiru: After I ran into the forest, he took off into a different direction... oh my ... what if he?

Subaru: What?

Mimiru: What if he tries to kill himself or something? He's unstable enough to try something like that...

Subaru: No use worrying about it... he'll come back. I know he will. Where are the others?

Mimiru: I guess they are still at that spooky mansion north of here.

Subaru: Well, let's meet up with them. Maybe CM rejoined them.

Mimiru: Maybe... Thanks Subaru...

Subaru: Hey, that's what friends are for! Girl power forever, right?

Mimiru: Heh, yeah. Let's go.

And so Mimiru and Subaru head back to the mansion to rejoin the crew. But where is CM? Find out next time on the Never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever

Subaru: Ahem?

Oh, sorry. Neverending Story ^2!

NSP: Feel free to post for any of my characters now. CM, Mimiru, Subaru, heck, even bring Wai back if you feel like it. Just keep in mind CM is nowhere to be found, and Wai is out wandering somewhere. If you post about them, at least don't make it a plothole [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif]

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net

[This message has been edited by Cool Matty (edited March 24, 2004).]
2004-03-25, 7:00 PM #139
(NSP: From Highemperor.)

1898 A.D. London.

It is now ten years after the death of Count Desmond and the premature aging of Erro Ohq II. Erro, though only 43, lies on his deathbed, dying from his premature old age.


Even now, though frail, he lies at an impressive length of almost 7 feet - despite his aging, he kept growing - lying swathed in a dark blue, almost black, robe. Even now, his strength his unparalleled - not his physical strength, but his purity of heart and hunger of stomach. Erro fixes his eyes on someone behind King Emp, who sits at his bedside alone.[/i]

King Emp: Erro, there's no one there.

Erro: Yes. . . only. . . an old friend. . .

King Emp: Erro, stay with us, just a little longer. Your son and wife will almost be here.

Erro: King, my oldest, and dearest friend, give them my love. Please.

King Emp: *choking back tears stoically* I... They know.

Erro: *sighing out his last breath* ... Morthrandur...

King Emp sits there for a long time, his face impassive. He leans forward and kisses the dead forehead, before pulling the hood over the pallid face.

King Emp: Be at peace, son of Gondor... er, England. For I... I will not.

The funeral is short but big. Erro is much loved by the people, who turn out for him, just as he had devoted his entire self to them. At last every one leaves, save for King Emp, who stands before the mausoleum. On the doors of the mausoleum are etched these words.

~~~~~~|~~~~~~
~~~~~~|~~~~~~
------|------
~~~~~~|~~~~~~
~~~~~~|~~~~~~
~~~~~~|~~~~~~
~~~~~~|~~~~~~

Dream a dream,
And see with angel's eyes,
A place where we can fly
Away.

Fly with me,
Upon a shining star,
Across the morning sky we will find
Elysium.


King Emp: Farewell, old friend. *he turns and disappears into the night*

-----

Present. Haunted House of Heroes, 8th dimension.

Highemp: *darkly* More deep stuff, Mustang.

Geb: Yeah, but what happened to King Emp?

Mustang: No one knows. He stole away Erro's body, for the next morning, the stone door of the mausoleum was broken. Within a year, the entire Armenian tribe that King Emp was ruler over vanished. Disappeared. Gone without a trace. According to history, that particular tribe never existed.

Geb: Interesting...

Highemp: Geb, we need to convene the other heroes here now.

Geb: Must we?

Highemp: Huh? Geb, you've always been enthusiastic- Oh. You're scared of CM, aincha?

Geb: Am not.

Highemp: Hahaha! Geb's scared of Cool Matty!

Geb: Am not! *chases Highemp around the room*

Mustang: Those two. . . they remind me so much ... of Erro and King...

-----

NSP: 1888 and the surrounding events of open to all. I had some big ideas, but Geb convinced they were probably too big, so most of 'em being scrapped, with the rest being insinuated into the story. Hope you like!
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-03-25, 7:27 PM #140
back in the NeS...

Jim7tW: this is odd... i know i wrote my character's scret base into this story... now where the hell did i put it?

Just then Jim7 appears from around a corner walking down the street when he spots his writer

Jim7: WTF!?

Jim7tW: Jim7, you....

Jim7: What are you doing here?

Jim7tW: I went through the portal... I believe i was sent to give you a message...

Jim7tW begins to remind Jim7 of his past and tells him of his future... since Jim7tW is the writer here he can do that...

Jim7tW: Do you remember... 1888... Austria?

Jim7: How, why, yes...

Jim7tW: You were in the castle... you were waiting in the cieling beams, waiting for your moment to kill Err Ohq II, but something caused you to hold your position, you did not take your opportunity to strike...

Jim7: I looked into his future... saw what was to become of him, and his children...

Jim7tW: and again in 1898 you were there...

Jim7: I watched him die... ever since that day in 1888 I vowed to watch over him...

Jim7tW: why didn't you stay to watch after his son after he died...

Jim7: That was unimportant... Marcus had returned to Hell, and Helebon's assassins...

Jim7tW: I know of this already...

Jim7: then why are you asking me these questions?

Jim7tW: because they must know...

Jim7: who?

Jim7tW: ... *gebs it*

WHOA DUDE... THAT WAS WEIRD...

------------------
wang is within all
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2004-03-26, 6:41 PM #141
(NSP: From Highemperor.)

Present. Haunted House of Heroes (HHH or H3), 8th dimension.

Highemp: Geb... there's something I have to tell you.

Geb: What? I'm adopted? *chortles at his little joke*

Highemp: ...

Geb: Oh, no, that is what you were going to say!

Highemp: Yes, old friend, older than you know, you guessed it-

Geb: Sorry to spoil your joke like that, Highemp, old buddy!

Highemp: No, it's like this-

Suddenly Jim7 bursts in.

Highemp: WHY does everyone keep interrupting me?

Jim7: Demons of mine, gather round, for-

He stops, as he sees only Highemp and Geb Ohq before him.

Jim7: *double take* Oh! Highemp, Geb, glad to see you found my secret base!

Geb: Er...

Highemp: Jim... I can't do it. I don't have the heart to tell him.

Geb: Well, unfortunately, I don't have the courage!

Jim7: Um... tell me what?

Highemp: We kinda, uh... *mumble*

Jim7: What? Speak up.

Highemp: *mumble*

Jim7: Louder.

Highemp: WE SLAUGHTERED ALL YOUR DEMONS!

Jim7: *flames dancing in his eyes* WHAT?!

Geb: They were kinda infesting the place, so we slaughtered them and dubbed this the new Hall of Heroes.

Highemp: I prefer Haunted House of Heroes, or H3, cuz there's still that monster in the closet, you know, and-

Jim7: WHAT. DID. YOU. DO. THAT. FOR!

Geb: Well, we figured, they're going to Hell anyway-

He and Highemp abruptly snicker.

Jim7: That's not funny.

Highemp and Geb: *snicker*

Jim7: It's not funny!

They erupt into a fit of hysterical giggles, and are soon rolling on the creaking floorboards, laughing.

Geb: *while rolling, between laughs* Hahahahahaha - Note to self: redo - ahahaha - redo floor - hahahahahahahahahaha...

Suddenly, Jim flares up, hellfire lighting up his frame, horns sprouting from his temple, and otherwise looking devilish.
Highemp and Geb quiet very quickly.


Jim7: *sigh* Well, at least, they're back down in Hell where I can retrieve them at will...

Highemp: Right, and think of the insurance coverage!

Geb: *snicker*

Jim7: Now don't start that again!

Geb: Yessir.

Highemp: Shutting up.

Jim7: Anywho... Geb, I was just reminded by my writer of the events of 1888.

Geb: You were around in 1888?

Highemp: *whispering an aside to Geb* He was a toddler.

Jim7: *glare*

Highemp: Zipping it.

Jim7: Thank you. Now then, upon seeing you, Geb, I remember that you-

Highemp: Wait! Don't spoil the suspense!

Jim7: I thought you were zipping it.

Highemp: My mouth is so big, it takes a while. I'm only a third of the way done. I'm talking out my other lip.

Geb: Huh? What am I missing here?

Highemp/Jim7: Nothing./Everything.

Geb: I'm confused.

Highemp: Good.

Jim7: Let me explain.

Highemp: No, keep the suspense going a little longer.

Jim7: Alright, you win. *pauses* That long enough?

Highemp: Good for me. Geb, you really are adopted.

Geb: WHAT?

Jim7: Huh? Now I'M confused. What does that have to do with-

He looks at Highemp and suddenly realizes the truth.

Jim7: OMQ!

Geb: Huh? Am I missing something?

Highemp/Jim7: Yes./No.

Geb: I'm confused. Again.

So what else is new?

Geb: *glare*

Shutting up. Zipping it. Turning off. Signing out. Shutting-

Geb, Highemp, and Jim7: Just shut up already!

*mumble*

Geb: I heard that!

Jim7: Geb, remember what Mustang was telling you about 1888? I'm immortal, you know, I WAS around then. *glaring at Highemp* NOT in my cradle.

Geb: *snicker*

What secrets will be revealed? OMQ!
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-03-28, 4:43 PM #142
Somewhere deep in the forest we find our hero (?) CoolMatty walking slowly, randomly.

CM: I'm so freakin stupid! Why the hell did I have to do that? What was wrong with me!? No wonder Mimiru hates me now!

Voice: Calm down... for with God, there lies forgiveness. You need only to seek it, and you shall be given it.

CM: Who's that?!

Voice: I am an angel. Your angel. God has instructed me to appear to you, so that I may help you through this tough future you will have.

CM: What tough future?! I have no future left.

Voice: Deep inside you know that not to be true. Mimiru still loves you, you know that, I know that, God knows that, EVERYONE knows that. You are blaming yourself too much.

CM: But it was my fault! I had no faith in Mimiru's ability...

Voice: Don't lie to yourself Tsukasa.

CM: Don't call me that. No one can call me that.

Voice: But it is your name, Tsukasa! Why must you hide your past? You did no wrongs.

CM: Because my past is filled with pains I'd rather forget.

Voice: But you cannot learn from the past if you ignore it. You must reflect upon the past, and use it for the future.

CM: If your my angel, why didn't you come help me earlier?

Voice: I was there, Tsukasa. God was there, and so was I. It is standard procedure for us angels not to reveal ourselves to our protected. It causes great problems. But rest assured, Tsukasa. We were there during all your troubled days.

CM: So why appear now? What is going to happen?

Voice: I cannot tell you all, it is forbidden. But I can tell you that if you wish to protect the ones you love, you need to train. You magic, it is a god given ability.

CM: This ability of mine is a CURSE. Nothing more.

Voice: No, Tsukasa. The events that lead to your power was nothing more than a ceremony. You've had the power your entire life, waiting for you to unlock it. Waiting for the perfect time. And now, more than ever, you will need that power, if you wish to protect those you love.

CM: Are you saying Mimiru is in trouble?

Voice: I cannot tell you, it is forbidden as I mentioned. But know that if you reject my offer for help, you will quite possibly suffer.

CM: What kind of help?

Voice: Training. Magic training. Your powers have advanced tremendously over the years, but you still have weaknesses. You've never really trained your power, never since you first got it. You just became better with it after repetitive use.

CM: Seems plenty strong to me!

Voice: Your magic ability is based around anger. You can only release your power by focusing on pent up anger. This isn't how God intended you to use it. This is why you get those headaches when you use your power. It is limiting your strength. And your power is growing weaker over time. You may not have noticed it yet, but the headaches will come on more often, and quicker.

CM: So what can I do to stop it?

Voice: You have to learn how to use it correctly. That is what I am offering to you. To teach you how to use your power correctly.

CM: Fine, I'll accept your offer. But what must I do?

Voice: Well first, I must take human form. I cannot teach you well when you cannot see me.

In front of CM is a small ball of pure white light. Light seems to bend around the ball, collecting inside it. The ball continues to grow, larger, and larger. Finally, it stops growing, and begins to fade. A strong wind starts blowing, and electricity sparks from the ball. The ball disappears, and a figure is left standing there. It is a woman.

CM: *sigh* How did I know my angel would be a woman...

Angel: This is only a form I took. I am neither male nor female.

CM: Well, either way... would you mind putting some clothes on?!

Once the angel had appeared, she was naked. Apparently angels didn't wear clothing.

Angel: If you wish.

A cloak appears around the angel, and is put on her. The cloak is shimmering white, with a hood that is left off her head. The cloak falls all the way down to her bare feet.

CM: Don't you want shoes or something? This dirt isn't exactly comfortable.

Angel: I cannot feel pain. Do not worry.

CM: Whatever. Well, what's first?

Angel: Before you can continue, you must ask God for forgiveness of your sins...

CM: Huh?

Angel: You almost killed a man. That is a serious sin. But God can forgive anything. You must ask however.

CM: Alright then, if I must...

CM proceeds to kneel and ask God for forgiveness. After he is finished, the angel places her hands on his head, and blesses him.

Angel: You have been forgiven, Tsukasa. But know that although you have righted a wrong with God, you still must ask forgiveness of those you hurt, namely Mimiru and Gebohq. I will let you take care of that later. We need to begin now, for time is of the essence.

The angel and CM sit down on the ground, and begin talking. The angel instructs CM on a few things about his power...

Angel: You need to move away from releasing anger as a way of using your power. This is the most important thing. First, go ahead and summon a flame as you normally would.

CM calls up a lick of flame to appear in his palm

Angel: Good. Now, take that anger, and throw it away. Concentrate on keeping that flame lit after pushing out the anger.

CM does as he is instructed. He throws away the anger, and focuses on trying to keep the flame lit. The flame goes out almost immediately.

CM: Stupid flame... I can't do this...

Angel: Yes you can, Tsukasa. You just have to keep trying. It will require practice, but you can do it. That is a promise.

CM continues to try, failing over and over. However, after about thirty minutes of trying, he manages to hold the flame lit for 10 seconds.

Angel: Very good! Your getting the hang of it now! Did you feel it? Did you feel the power?

CM: Yeah, it was so strong! That surprised me, I didn't expect that.

Angel: Now try and use that power to create another flame.

CM does so. A very very small flame appears. CM focuses on it, and begins trying to make the flame grow.

Angel: That's it! Keep it up!

CM keeps the flame going, and it continues to grow. Suddenly, the flame explodes into a huge fire.

CM: Woh! Geez!

CM, surprised, quickly extinguishes the fire.

Angel: You have finally tapped into the power. Don't forget that feeling. It is the secret to your power.

CM: I'm going to test one of my skills with that power...

CM: Firewall!!!!

A wall of fire appears in front of CM, and stretches hundreds of feet into the air.

CM: HOLY $%#!

Angel: What was that?

CM: Erm... nothing. Sorry.

Angel: You must learn to control it now. You are not used to such unrestricted power. Control is the most important aspect. Without control you'll do much more than you wanted. This can be very dangerous. Not only that, but you'll wear out your power easily.

CM: So my power still is limited, then.

Angel: Yes, there is limits to all powers. The more you train it, however, the longer you can use your power, and you'll also use less of it for the same effects.

CM: Makes sense... so any tips on control?

Angel: Nothing short of pure practice will do. You will simply need to keep casting spells until you master it.

CM: Okay, but I need someone to spar with to do it effectively.

Angel: Feel free to fight me.

CM: An angel?! I won't fight an angel!

Angel: Do not worry, you cannot harm me.

CM nods, and grabs his staff. He summons a fireball, and fires it at the Angel. The angel sticks out her hand, and abosrbs the attack.

Angel: Much too weak. Try again.

CM casts fireball again, and again the Angel absorbs it.

Angel: Better, but you are holding yourself back. Trust me, you won't hurt me.

CM summons one more fireball, and puts much more behind it. The fireball connects with the Angel, and she bursts into flames.

CM: Oh my God!!!! No!!!!

However, the flames disappear, and the Angel reappears.

Angel: I told you to trust me. You cannot hurt me. But that was a good attack, you are becoming better. Now, give me everything you have.

CM begins to cast Phoenix Strike. The bird of flame CM usually expects to appear doesn't. Instead, a GIANT bird of flame appears, and swoops down. The bird is easily 100 feet wing to wing. The bird flies straight into the Angel, and she promptly bursts into flames again, along with all the forest around her.

CM: Wow....

The Angel reappears, and the fires immediately extinguish.

Angel: Now you are getting better. I would continue to train you, but unfortunately we have run out of time. You must head back to the Hall of Heroes.

CM: But the HH was destroyed!

Angel: The group has claimed the mansion to be the new Hall of Heroes.

CM: Ah. But I don't know how to get back there...

Angel: You have a way to return. Just think about it. I must go. Good luck, Tsukasa. Remember, control. It is all about control.

CM: Wait! I never caught your name!!!

Angel: If you require a name, you may call me Aura.

CM: Aura? Interesting. Thank you!

Aura: Go now, in peace. The threat grows closer.

CM: Thank you!

Aura disappears. CM is left in the woods.

CM: Well... how am I going to get back? I'm easily a few miles away...

CM: I wonder... with my new power... I might be able to teleport all the way...

CM: But if I don't make the teleport... I don't want that to happen again.

(Voiceinhead): Have faith, Tsukasa.

CM: That's it. I'm gotta try.

CM gathers all the strength he has, and focuses on the mansion. Finally, he disappears.

Back at the Mansion...

Highemp: Was Jimmy just a wittle wittle baby?

Jim7: SILENCE FOOL!

Highemp: What are you going to do, kill me?

Jim7: I MIGHT!

Highemp: Good luck with that! Been done already!

Jim7: Will you just *fart* shut up?

Geb: Hahahahahaha he farted!

Geb and Highemp burst out laughing, and again are rolling on the floorboards.

Jim7: BOTH OF YOU, CUT IT OUT!

Geb: Oh that's great!

Highemp: I bet it catches on fire when he is in Hell!

Geb: Hahahahaha!!!!

They both continue to roll around laughing. Suddenly, a blinding flash of light appears, and everyone freezes.

CM: I'm baaaaaccck!!!!

Geb: ... Er... Matt! ... You're ... back...!

CM: I want to apologize, Gebohq. I wasn't thinking right. I know it probably isn't enough to just say

Geb: Nah it's fine.

CM: No really, I want to say...

Geb: Really, it's fine. I forgive you.

CM: But I just want to ...

Geb: No that's alright. Your good.

CM: I mean, I can...

Geb: No... I forgive you already!

CM: But I was gonna give you donu....

Geb: I said I forg... did you say donuts?

CM: Errr yeah.

Geb: Fine. I won't forgive you until you get me some donuts.

CM: Fine with me!

CM closes his eyes, and imagines Geb holding a glazed donut in his hand. Almost instantly, the donut appears in Geb's hand.

Geb: Woohoo!!!

Jim7: WILL EVERYONE STOP IGNORING ME?! WE WERE ON THE VIRGE OF SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT HERE!

Highemp: Oh save it. We got donuts! Nothing can go wrong!

What is the evil the Angel speaks of? Is it the same evil that Morthrandur spoke of bringing to NeS? When is Mimiru and Subaru going to get to the mansion? And where in the heck are those robots?! Find out next time on the Neverending Story Thread... times 2!

CM: Actually... it's the second power. It's not multiplication.

Shutup.

CM: Shutting up.

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net
2004-03-29, 4:34 PM #143
* Meanwhilst... *

* At The Mega-ZZTer's secret base in Antarctica... in the main hanger bay... *

* The hanger is a small, rectangular room looking not much unlike the New Republic base on Hoth. There is a sleek, black fighter jet plane parked in the middle of it, filling up the room. There is a ramp in the back lowered down, with a few small boxes inside the cargo compartment. The Mega-ZZTer walks in, holding a box with both arms and huffing as he walks. *

MZZT: All right... finally, all my stuff packed up. * places the box on the ramp. He then reaches to a small black box on his belt and flips a switch, then speaks into his headset * Hero One, come in Hero One, this is Deep Freeze Base.

* Over the comm creaking floorboards and laughing can be heard, drowning out Jim7's yelling in the background *

Geb *over comm*: hehehe... kinda... busy here... Mega... hahaha...

Highemp * softer, over Geb's mic *: hahahahaha! Yeah... catches on fire! Hhehehee!!

Jim7: SHUT. UP.

* Suddenly, a tiny roar builds and crescendos in a huge ZAP, and the rolling and laughing stops rather abruptly. *

Jim7: Thank you... um... * shouting into Geb's mic * sorry Deep Freeze Base... Hero One is... out of commission for a bit...

Geb: Ow.

Highemp: Geez... we were only joking... um, do you know any heal spells CM? I feel a little... charred...

CM: Well... no...

The Mega-ZZTer: *ahem* er... ok... ANYways, Base 2, I am reporting in.

Geb: Er.... ok... what's up?

The Mega-ZZTer: Hero One, you KNOW that's not proper protoco... bah, whatever. Geb, I'm just about to close up my Secret Base(TM) here and head out, I'm all packed and loaded * slides last crate up the ramp with his foot *.

Geb: Great. Get here soon before Jim7 kills us. Hero One Out.

Jim7: *fart*

* The rolling, creaking, and laughing resumes as quickly as it had stopped *

Jim7: KAK FREAKING KAKKIT, I had Taco Bell for lunch, OK?!?!

Highemp: Yeah.. he'll *cough* kill us all right! I'll DIE laughing!! HEHEHE

Geb: Haha! Taco Bell... you know that bell dong? They should make it a farting noise instead.

Jim7: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!

* Suddently a huge burst of static comes over the receiver as Geb's comm "mysteriously" dies. *

The Mega-ZZTer: Hmmm... oh well. * switches comm off * I better pack another first-aid kit. * Heads for his office *

* A couple minutes later... *

* The Mega-ZZTer comes back in, turning lights off as he passes the switches, the hanger is now pitch-black save a few lights on a console near the door. *

* He walks through the dark hanger confidently, tosses the kit in the back of the jet, and presses an inner button. With a whir of a motor, the ramp raises and closes off the cargo section. *

* The Mega-ZZTer walks over to the glowing console and presses one button. With a rumble of big motors, the over-head doors open and light streams in. *

* He strides over to the jet cockpit, now only carrying a pack on his back and a laptop case slung over his shoulder. He enters a number on a keypad, and the canopy slides open. He jumps in, sets his gear down, and closes the canopy. The doors above finish opening and grind to a halt as the bright Antarctian sky is revealed. *

* With a whine, the jet engines start up, the running lights come on, and then it vertically takes off (the vertical lifters run on a secret power source), and when it clears the doors, they automatically begin closing... *

* The engine whine increases in pitch and the jet zooms off horizontally as the vertical lifters quit... soon it is cruising at mach .9 over the water... then, all of a sudden, as it hits mach 1, an indigo field envelops the jet, and the sonic boom (if there had been anyone to hear it) is accompanied by a flash of light, and it disappears into the 8th dimension... *

(NSP: Yecti... those are awesome. Make one the standard 88x31, so I can use it on my site. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/smile.gif])

------------------
The Mega-ZZTer's Gaming Haven!

Bot Pack JO | Let's Roll JK | Bespin JA | Patch Enforcer JK/MotS | Pac-Man JK

[This message has been edited by The_Mega_ZZTer (edited March 29, 2004).]

2004-03-29, 7:27 PM #144
Jim7, tired of the laughing, storms off back to the NeS...

Jim7: WHAT THE...

Jim7, having just returned form the 8th dimension, notices a castle not previously there...

Jim7: This must be Helebon's doing... I cannot confront him here... it is not my place... the heroes must take care of this themselves...

Jim7 enters a trance like state to contact Geb...

Jim7 out of body: GEB!!!

Geb: AHHH A GHOST!!!!

Geb jumps back into the closet with the monster

Jim7oob: The monster is still in there geb...

Geb jumps out of the closet...

Jim7oob: Geb... you must return to the NeS... Heleb....

Just then Jim7's ghostly out of body image disappears

Geb: Huh? oh well... back to the doughnuts...

back in the NeS...

Jim7: Damn... something interrupted the connection...

Just then Tony walks in

Tony: Boss, Geb pushed a button on his belt that hung up on your call...

Jim7: DAMN HIM... DAMN HIM TO HELL AND DAMN THIS PLACE!!!!

Jim7 storms out, heads to the docks and moments later the sky blackens, the ground shakes and the docks and a large part of the city near the docks bursts into flames

Jim7: WRAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

At the old HoH...

Qhobeg: PREPARE TO DIE GANON!!!!

Jim7 busts into the room, walks to the Gamecube, turns it off and runs off with it

Qhobeg: YOU **** I DIDN'T EVEN SAVE MY GAME!!!!

Later in the 8th dimension....

Geb: I love doughnuts...

All: we know already...

Geb: oh...

Just then Qhobeg busts into the room and starts to tell Geb what happened...

Qhobeg: Geb, it's Jim7, he is destroying th city...

Geb: So, he's Satan, and I have doughnuts...

Qhobeg: ... and the stole the gamecube

Geb: HE'S GONE TOO FAR!!!!

WHY WOULD JIM7 DO SOMETHING SO UNSPEAKABLY EVIL? WHY DID QHOBEG PLAY THROUGH THE WIND WAKER WITHOUT EVER SAVING? WHAT DID THE GAMECUBE EVER DO TO JIM?

------------------
wang is within all
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2004-03-29, 8:24 PM #145
Geb: We need to round up everyone again -- back to our home dimension!

Everyone else: O_o

Geb: What?

CoolMatty: *to Highemperor* Which one's the real Geb?

Highemperor: *to CM* I dunno, they moved around too much.

Geb: What are you guys talking... *looks at Qhobeg* --Ah. How odd...*goes to poke Qhobeg*

Qhobeg: Don't touch me! You're Gebohq, I'm Qhobeg. My left eye is pale, see?

General sounds of recognition are heard from the others.

Qhobeg: Now maybe you'd like to transport us all out of the 8th dimension?

Geb: Right. Let me just get out my PHP here...oh crap, that's right. I ran out of ammo.

Everyone else: Wha?

Highemperor: That weapon was just a crutch, Geb. Wield the NeS, and us out of this dimension.

Geb: OK...

Geb twirls his arm around, with no effect. Dissapointed at a lack of cool swooshing fade effect of the environment, he simply concentrates. The surroundings begin to distort and alter, with walls shifting violently. Gebohq lets out a deep breath, and the environment turns back to normal.

Geb: Let me try that again...

CM: Uh--better not Geb. Our journey here wasn't exactly a safe process.

Geb: Can you do anything with your magic, CM?

CM: My transportation powers are limited, especially dealing with a dimension I don't still fully understand. Sorry.

Geb: Highemperor?

Highemp: No dice. Being dead puts a hamper on things...

Geb: Wait... how the hell did you get here, Qhobeg?

Qhobeg begins to open his mouth, but stops short of saying anything. He scratches his head.

Qhobeg: You know, I don't remember...

CM: We're trapped, great.

Geb: Maybe MZZT will be able to help us out when he gets here. Until then, we better get everyone together.

Mustang: Gebohq, I fear the current events may be interconnected with the events that occured in 1888.

Geb: Perhaps we should have listened to Jim... man this place gives me the creeps. What's with this place?

Mustang: Its history is woven deep with dark mystery, tracing back to 1888 and Jim.

Highemperor: You care to be more informative?

Mustang: Uh...we better find your other friends.

Geb: Right then. We'll be out of this place and kicking evil butt before you can say "plothole."

CoolMatty: Plothole?

Geb: ...a hundred times.

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited March 30, 2004).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-03-30, 3:19 AM #146
* Suddenly, a high-pitched whine can be heard outside the HHoH... then it cuts out and is replaced with the sound of an explosion. Five minutes later, The Mega-ZZTer staggers in with his gear, slightly charred and coughing. *

Highemp: Something... wrong?

MZZT: Bah. Stupid jet.

Geb: I thought it was your best jet. Where'd you get it?

MZZT: Pepsi points.

Geb: Oh... did the dimension-crossing thingy come with it?

MZZT: Yup.

CoolMatty: I take it it malfunctioned?

MZZT: Er... *shifteyes* MALFUNCTIONED... yeah... I did NOT crash it because of poor flying skills... ahem.... ANYWAYS, what's up?

Mustang: We need to get back to the real world...

Highemp: Out of the 8th dimension.

Mustang: ...and your leader Gebohq does not seem to be able to do it with his powers.

MZZT: Hm... do we have the Thingy™ here?

CM: Well... sorta...

Geb + MZZT + Mustand + Highemp: "Sorta?"

CM: Welll... after the HoH went blooey... I brought it's PIECES...

All: *groan*

MZZT: Well... I can try to use my knowledge of temporal physics to repair/rebuild the Thingy™.

Mustang: Temporal?

Highemp: Deals with time. Mega, but we want to move betwen DIMENSIONS.

MZZT: Well, time is simply the fourth dimension. All I have to do is take all my training and extend it by four more dimensions! *whistles happily and walks off*

Geb: Is that possible?

CM: No... I'm sure he'll find out himself though.

* Later, in the Thingy™ room…*

* CoolMatty walks in *

CM: Er... how’s it coming?

MZZT: I just finished!

CM: I’m sorry to hear that you weren’t able to... WHAT?!

MZZT: All done!

CM: ... HOW?!?

MZZT: Er... I... um... fixed? *waves the wrench he is holding around aimlessly in the air*

* CM stares at the new… improved… Thingy² ™!!! It is polished and sparkling as if it is brand new… the lights on the control panels are blinking as if happy, and there is not a spark or a loose gear to be seen. *

CM: So... let me get this straight...it WORKS now.

MZZT: Er... well in THEORY.

CM: Ah. *sigh* Well… do you know if it’ll still HURT?

MZZT: I dunno.

CM: And you “fixed” it... and yet you don’t know what will happen when we step inside.

MZZT: Er...

CM: Sounds good enough to me *pats MZZT on the back* I’ll go get Geb and the others... let’s make sure they go through first. *winks at MZZT and goes to get Geb and the others*

[Edit: I resized one of those buttons to 88x31 if anyone wants it:
[http://www.mzzt.net/images/nes.gif]
]

------------------
The Mega-ZZTer's Gaming Haven!

Bot Pack JO | Let's Roll JK | Bespin JA | Patch Enforcer JK/MotS | Pac-Man JK

[This message has been edited by The_Mega_ZZTer (edited March 30, 2004).]

2004-03-30, 11:38 AM #147
nsp: uh, what happened to TLTE and qwerty? we were in the lobby, TLTE about to start attacking wizards... and now we're nowhere to be seen. I don't want to write for TLTE yet, i don't think i'll do his character well, but could someone write us back in? (TLTE, preferably, but he's not written yet, either)

------------------
"No good can ever come from staying with normal people"
-Outlaw Star
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul"
-Tycho, Penny Arcade
"I'm a Cannabal-Vegitarian. I will BBQ an employee if there is no veggie option"
-DX:IW
A Knight's Tail
Exile: A Tale of Light in Dark
The Never Ending Story²
"I consume the life essence itself!... Preferably medium rare" - Mauldis

-----@%
2004-03-30, 12:28 PM #148
NES^2 ?! ... good Lord!
*notes for noteworthyness that he is, in fact, -not- dead...just too lazy to post anymore...*
You crazys have fun and try not to poke out too many eyes. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/wink.gif]

GuardianFox.Net

[This message has been edited by Randy (edited March 30, 2004).]
"Build a better level, and the JK community will beat a path to your door." - Randy
GuardianFox.Net
2004-03-30, 1:18 PM #149
[NSP]

Quote:
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Randy:
just too lazy to post anymore...*</font>


YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!

FEEL THE NeSFORCE, RANDY. LET IT FLOW THROUGH YOU.

[/NSP]

------------------
The Mega-ZZTer's Gaming Haven!

Bot Pack JO | Let's Roll JK | Bespin JA | Patch Enforcer JK/MotS | Pac-Man JK

[This message has been edited by The_Mega_ZZTer (edited March 30, 2004).]

2004-03-30, 2:05 PM #150
Meanwhile, as MZZT and CM run off to find Geb, the Thingy^2 starts to make noise

Thingy: BING!

I said THINGY. you are not TMTGB^2, you are the THINGY.

Thingy: BING!

No thingy thats a bad thingy!

Thingy: *sad*bing.

Now, now, i didnt mean to hurt your feelings, its just thats not the noise you're supposed to be making.

Thingy: *remorseful, muttering*bing.

Its okay, how bout this: If you make the noises youre supposed to make, i'll give you a treat.

Thingy: *excited* BING BING BING!

Allright heres your chance. *ahem* As i was saying the Thingy^2 starts making strange noises. humming thrumming wooshing squooshing crackly dackly noises.

Thingy: HUMmmmmmm. Thrummm. WOOOSH! SQUOOOSH! CRACKLE! DACKLE! BING!

HEY! No treat for y...hey...whats this? just as the Thing said BING!, a figure was flung against the wall! Hes a long hair, dressed in a black shirt with strange symbols, denim boot flares and...converse tennis shoes? man what a hippy!


Who could this figure be? Where did he come from? Why is the THingy makign Bing! noises? Whats with the questions man? Peace, Love, Rock & Roll!


Thingy: BING!

------------------
<Dormouse> there are very few things quite as comforting as smelling like a close friend.

We are only human, perfect in our imperfections. - Erin amie du Dor

<Dormouse> it's really cute in the way that a sherman tank with a fuzzy steering wheel is cute

[This message has been edited by Ford (edited March 30, 2004).]
My girlfriend paid a lot of money for that tv; I want to watch ALL OF IT. - JM
2004-03-30, 2:09 PM #151
* Soon, after the mysterious figure has left the room, the heroes in the HHoH walk into the room and are gathered before the new Thingy²™. *

Geb: This is wonderful! We can go back!

Mustang: But wait! Something will happen here soon, I am sure of it! We must stay here!

Highemp: Throw the switch Mega!

* MZZT throws the main switch on the Thingy²™. The Thingy²™ had been putting out an unnoticable hum until now, but now it begins growing in intensity and volume. A ring-shaped portal, which looks not unlike a Stargate, begins flashing and a small tear of light can be seen in it's center *

All: Ooh!

CM: Wow... Mega, I thought the old fuse box in this place wouldn't be able to handle this type of power! But I gotta hand it to ya...

MZZT: Wait... what? ... oops

* Suddenly the room darkens and the hum stops. *

MZZT: Carp.

Mustang: Ah... good, we can stay!

All: Shut up.

------------------
The Mega-ZZTer's Gaming Haven!

Bot Pack JO | Let's Roll JK | Bespin JA | Patch Enforcer JK/MotS | Pac-Man JK

2004-03-31, 3:13 PM #152
Subaru and Mimiru are still walking in the forest...

Subaru: How far away exactly did you run from the mansion?

Mimiru: ... uhhh... not this long...

Subaru: We're lost, aren't we?

Mimiru: Maybe... erm... yeah.

Subaru: Great. Well, we should just keep walking straight ahead. We have to hit something event u al .... ly......

Mimiru: What is it?

Subaru: Look between those trees ahead...

Mimiru: ... Is that a house?

Subaru: Are you that ignorant? It's YOUR HOUSE!

Mimiru: You mean... we were on the island the entire time?!

Subaru: Sure seems like it!

Mimiru: Well this is good news! We can pick up equipment and head back to the mansion in the jet.

Subaru: Yeah! GIRL POWER CONTINUES!

Mimiru: ... that's enough of the 'girl power' thing. I thought you were joking before.

Subaru: Oh... sorry... I thought it was the 'in' thing now.

Mimiru: I thought you knew better by now. Your travels have pushed you so far behind it's scary. So don't try and be 'in' anymore. Please.

Subaru: Ouch, harsh words!

Mimiru: Well let's not waste time!

The two hurry off to the house, or more appropriately, the apartment complex, due to its size.

Mimiru: Computer, open basement level one bay doors.

Computer(Far away megaphone): Analyzing voice fingerprint.... Analyzed. Welcome home Mimiru. Now opening bay doors.

Suddenly, the ground began to tremble before them. It then split, and moved to the sides. Below was a huge hangar, complete with lift, a couple of jets, a helicopter, and the remains of the old Cadillac with a jet engine. A small lift raises up to pick up the two, and they head down to the floor.

Subaru: This place amazes me every time I come in.

Mimiru: Meh, it's only the first level.

Subaru: Oh you're so modest!

Mimiru: Heh. Computer, hangar lights on.

Computer: Hangar lights on.

Mimiru: Computer, prepare the triforce jet for liftoff.

Computer: Preparing the TRIFORCE for liftoff.

Subaru: I'll pick up my adventuring bag.

Mimiru: Okay, I'm going to grab a few things myself. Meet back here in 10?

Subaru: Sure.

The two scatter off in different directions, into the depths of the complex. Meanwhile, the sounds of machinery can be heard, as the jet is moved up on the launch platform, and the launch ramp is extended. Just as the engines are started and warmed up, the two return.

Mimiru: Well, you ready?

Subaru: Yep, all packed!

Mimiru: Well, let's hit it!

Subaru: I'll fly, you get on the radar and GPS system and find the mansion. I'm not as good with that stuff.

Mimiru: Alright.

Subaru jumps in the front seat of the cockpit, and Mimiru slips into the back seat.

Mimiru: Computer, ready for takeoff.

Computer: Acknowledged. All equipment is now detached and moved. Your launch path is clear. TRIFORCE is ready for takeoff. Goodbye, Mimiru and Subaru.

Mimiru: Computer, understood. After launch, run lockup sequence 3.

Computer: Waiting to launch lockup sequence 3.

Mimiru: Aight Subaru, we're clear. Let's hit it.

Subaru: Hold on to your purse, this girl is now moving!

The engines fire, and the jet takes off. Not seconds later, they are in the air. The bay doors close, and the house is locked up. Mimiru and Subaru head back to the mansion, following Mimiru's flight path instructions. Find out what happens next on THE NEVERENDING STORY SQU-- HOLY BEJEBUS!!!!

Mimiru: WATCH IT SUBARU, YOU'RE GONNA HIT THE NARRATOR!

Subaru: Eh? OH HOLY MOTHER OF CARP!

AHHH!!!!!

M&S: AHHHHH!!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHHHHH....

Mimiru: Next time, I fly.

Subaru: Hehe... oops.

... I don't get paid well enough for this.

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net
2004-04-01, 10:57 AM #153
We rejoin Subaru and Mimiru in the TRIFORCE...

Mimiru: There is the mansion... it's only 1 mile away.

Subaru: Ready?

Mimiru: Bombs away!!!!

Suddenly, Subaru flicks a switch, and the bomb bay doors of the jet open wide. One enormous bomb drops out of the doors, and falls straight for the mansion.

Mimiru: It's away! LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!

The TRIFORCE takes off away from the mansion, as the bomb rapidly decends. Little do the heroes know they are about to be obliterated...

Highemp: I got a weird feeling...

Geb: What's that?

Highemp: As if we are about to be obliterated by an enormous bomb dropped from a huge jet piloted by Subaru and navigated by Mimiru...

CM: Hogwash! Subaru can't fly!

Finally, the bomb makes contact, obliterating all the heroes.

Highemp: Well, all but one. One bonus of being dead, you can't die again. WEEEEEEEeeeeee!

In the rubble of the mansion, Highemp finds a conveniently placed Gamecube, complete with TV, controllers, a stack of games, and an independent power source, all in a bomb shelter.

Highemp: Woohoo! They have Metroid Prime!

And so Highemp proceeds to play Metroid Prime, while the evils of NeS take over, and destroy the world. THE END!


Weeee april fools post!!!!

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net
2004-04-01, 11:08 AM #154
* What S & M could not have known is that MZZT had crashed his jet just outside the mansion. What they also could not have known is that MZZT liked to carry 10 experimental nukes on it, each with the force of 10 of the nukes S & M had dropped on the mansion. You can guess what happened when the explosion hit the jet. *

[http://mink.weezel.net/~tristan/vProfile/gbktext.php?text=BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!&lite=255&bold=0&italic=0&ul=0]

* The jet's explosion quickly overwelms the comparitively tiny explosion made by S & M's nuke. The name of these experimental nukes that were detonated are "SmartNukes" (patents pending), and they have the intelligence to blow up the most important, annoying, or aggrivating targets first. Needless to say, first the explosion vaporizes any pieces of CoolMatty that were left. (Die.) However, it manages to completely avoid the GameCube, then it vaporizes everything in a 3-mile radius. Unfortunately, the TRIFORCE is only 1.5 miles away at this point. *

S & M: Ahhh!! It's caught us!!! The TRIFORCE is decintegrating!!!

* I hope you've learned your lesson. *

S & M: What?

* Removes mask *

MZZT: Don't piss me off. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/biggrin.gif]

S & M: Bah. We hate you. [http://forums.massassi.net/html/frown.gif]

* MZZT, because he switched places with the Narrator for a day, is able to quickly get away with omnipotent powers. Bwhahahaha! *

S & M: No fair.

* The TRIFORCE finally explodes. *

Narrator in MZZT disguise: *dying* Carp, I knew I shouldn't have listened. "It's April Fools" he said. "They'll try to play a trick on you." he said. "Switch places with me for the day." he said. Blargh. *dies*

(NSP: April fools [http://forums.massassi.net/html/tongue.gif])

------------------
The Mega-ZZTer's Gaming Haven!
"One Forum to rule them all, One Forum to find them, One Forum to bring them all and in the darkness PWN THEM." - Mega-ZForums ... coming soon... maybe... .'/

Bot Pack JO | Let's Roll JK | Bespin JA | Patch Enforcer JK/MotS | Pac-Man JK

[This message has been edited by The_Mega_ZZTer (edited April 01, 2004).]

2004-04-01, 8:34 PM #155
(NSP: From Highemperor, heavily edited by yours truely.)

London, England. The Tower on the Thames. 1873.

Erro Ohq II is currently being held in the Thames Tower prison for daring to break with tradition. A Japanese warlord named Sword Wader in a black cloak, cape, and samurai mask is questoning him.


Sword Wader: I will wask you one moa time: whea is the location of the Webel base?

Erro Ohq II: For the last time, there is no Webel base! I have no clue what you're talking about!

Random Guy in Next Cell: Hey, uh, Mister Wader, sir, I'M the Webel suspect, not him.

Sword Wader: Woh, yes. *checks docet* Sowwy, mistah Ohq. A vewy unfoatunate soycumstance. *leaves to torture the Webel suspect*

Erro: WHAT? You mean, you tortured me for nothin'! Grr. . .

He hears a chinking sound in the rock behind him, and a stone block in the tower wall is pushed into the room, leaving a gaping hole through which King Emp stares through.

King Emp: Hello, Erro. I see you've gotten into no world of trouble while you've been away.

Erro: Well, at least the lamps aren't broken.

King Emp: *sigh* Let's you out of here. *undoes Erro's chains* You contacted me about a League of Heroes?

The cell door opens and Sword Wader and some English soldiers rush in.

Sword Wader: Coysed webels! Bweaking into my towah to steal my pwisonah!

Erro: *to Emp* I'll explain later.

King Emp: Good call.

They escape, diving out the hole in the tower wall into the churning river below. In the mist, they swim away without being seen.

Erro: Whew! That was a close one! But, yes, friend King, I wish to start a League of Heroes. Would you be interested in being a member?

King Emp: Certainly. BTW, what were they holding you prisoner for?

Erro: For being too foolish.

King Emp: Hmm. . .

-----

Present Day. 8th dimension. In a now very dark, unlit H3.

CM: So we're stuck. Again.

MZZT: Thanks in no small part to Geb.

Geb: What? Someone's actually thanking me for a change?

MZZT: Uh, well, if you want to look at it that way-

Geb: Yeeeee! *breaks down in tears and hugs MZZT*

MZZT: Er... guys?

Highemp: Don't look at me. YOU said it.

CM: We better find the circuit breaker. *wanders in the dark* If this place HAS one--*trips*

Voice: Oof! Watch where you're walking!

Geb: Mustang?

Mustang: Over here!

CM: Then who'd I just trip over?

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited April 01, 2004).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-04-02, 3:32 PM #156
We revisit Geb and the gang at the HHH...

CM: Then who'd I just trip over?

Geb: Oh, it's you!

Highemp: I was wondering where you went!

Mustang: What're you doing down there anyway?

CM picks himself up off the floor, and turns around to see who he tripped on.

CM: Oh, hey Ford.

Ford: Hi... I was wondering when you all would realize I'm still here. After the thingy knocked me to the floor, I just decided to stay there... felt kinda good.

Geb: Sounds sensible.

Suddenly, a loud plane is heard flying past the mansion. It shakes the mansion.

WOOOOOSHHHHHH

MZZT pops back into the room from where the Thingy2 was.

MZZT: What in sam hell was that?

CM: Sounded like a jet!

MZZT: WHAT? NOT MY JET! Who's stealing my jet?! I thought I totalled that thing!

MZZT panics and runs out the door. The sound of the jet returns, but this time, much slower. The jet seems to be hovering next to the HHH.

MZZT (yelling): Wait, that isn't my jet!

Geb: What did you say? I can't hear you over your jet!

MZZT: I SAID IT WASN'T MY JET!

Geb: WHAT?

MZZT: FORGET IT!

Geb: WHAT DID YOU FORGET?

MZZT: THE BAT TO SMITE YOU WITH!

Geb: I HEARD THAT!

MZZT: Figures.

CM: WELL WHO'S JET IS IT?

MZZT: IT SAYS TRIFORCE ON THE SIDE, I THINK!

CM: WHAT?! TRIFORCE? THAT'S MY JET!

MZZT: YOU HAVE A JET?!

CM runs out the door next to MZZT. Sure enough, his jet, the TRIFORCE, was currently hovering, and slowing decending for landing.

MZZT: SINCE WHEN DID YOU HAVE A JET?

CM: IT'S NOT REALLY MINE, IT'S MIMIRU'S. SHE GAVE IT TO ME FOR A BIRTHDAY PRESENT THOUGH.

MZZT: SHE GAVE YOU A JET FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?!

CM: WELL, WHEN YOU'RE AS FILTHY RICH AS SHE IS...

The jet finally touches down, and the engines shut off. The forest becomes eerily quiet.

CM: Who's flying my fine vessel?

The cockpit pops up, and Mimiru stands up, along with Subaru.

CM: Mimiru! ...

Mimiru: I'm sorry about earlier...

CM: Not half as sorry as I am... I didn't put enough trust in you...

Subaru: Hey! We can have these little make-up discussions later. I wanna get off this thing!

The two climb down the plane. Mimiru runs over and hugs CM.

Mimiru: I was so worried about you!

CM: About what?

Mimiru: I thought you might do something drastic...

CM: I wouldn't do something like that to you!

Mimiru: Oh Matt...

They continue to embrace, while the rest of the gang proceeds outside to see what's going on.

Geb: Woah... hello...

Highemp: Weren't they at their throats like, 3 hours ago?

Geb: That's what I thought!

Suddenly, someone else comes running out of the HHH.

Ford: GEEZ, LEAVE ME BEHIND AGAIN! DO I NOT EXIST TO YOU OR SOMETHING?

Mustang: Say, Geb, when's the last time you talked to Losien anyway?

Geb: Ya know, I don't really remember.

Ford: You're ignoring me again!

MZZT: Oh, hi Ford. Where'd you come from?

Ford: THE MANSION! I WAS STANDING IN THE ROOM FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

MZZT: Oh, right.

Subaru: ... Mimiru, Matt... you can kinda ... let go of eachother now. It's been a few minutes already...

M & M: Oh... heh.

The two break up, and Mimiru gives CM a peck on the cheek.

Mimiru: Don't get me so worried again...

CM: I'll try.

Geb: SOOoooo... what'd you bring?

Subaru: Sort of obvious, isn't it?

Geb: ... Traveling pack?

MZZT: No, the plane! You know, THE PLANE!

Geb: Oh, right. I knew that. Really, I did.

Highemp: That sure is a big jet...

Mimiru: Yeah, but what else you going to spend money on?

Geb: Donuts?

Mimiru: Besides that.

Geb: People use money for stuff other than donuts?

Mimiru: *sigh* Well... now what? Who's still missing?

Geb: Oh, umm... I dunno.

Subaru: You... don't know? YOU'RE THE WEILDER OF THE NES! IF YOU DON'T KNOW, WHO DOES?!

Geb: God?

Subaru slaps her head

Subaru: Come on... let's just start naming people.

Geb: Okay, we have...

Everyone starts throwing out names...

Thrawn the bot
His bot pal
Qwerty
TLTE
Jim's compadres
Qhobeg
EvilGeb

CM: Bah, there has to be more...

Geb: Probably... but I can't think of anyone.

Mustang: So anyway, about the past...

Highemp: Here we go again! ...

Senseless bickering continues from there. Where are those people? Who else is still lost in this new dimension? And just how obsessed IS Geb with donuts?! Find out next time, on the story of +5 neverending!

------------------
"The future is not determined by a throw of the dice, but is determined by the conscious decisions of you and me."
I am addicted to ellipses!!! AHHH!!! ...
Make Sorrowind Worthwhile... join it! http://sorrowind.net


EDITS: WEEE, BUTCHER FRESH! GET THE MEAT WHILE IT'S HOT!

[This message has been edited by Cool Matty (edited April 02, 2004).]

[This message has been edited by Cool Matty (edited April 02, 2004).]
2004-04-05, 4:43 AM #157
This just in! Gebohq really likes doughnuts. A lot. Especially the blueberry ones. He is, however, not obsessed with doughnuts -- he likes a number of other pastries equally as much, including but not limited to pies, eclairs, cakes, turnovers, and muffins. Geb does often have a one-track mindset though.

So, that's one questioned answered, it seems... But don't forget about those other CLIFFHANGER QUESTIONS! Stay Tuned, for surely THOSE will be answered!


==The Never-ending Story Thread (squared) will return after these messages.==

Announcer: Buy B.U.M.P.! Buy it now!! Only 5 easy installments of $13.37! Act now and get this $69 NSP ABSOLUTELY FREE! No interest, no annual fee, no long distance or roaming charges until 2005!

[This message has been edited by Gebohq (edited April 05, 2004).]
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-04-08, 8:45 PM #158
Back in the old NeS dimension that has been overlooked...

Jim7: What the hell is taking them so long?

Tony: Well, it's the heroes... they probably blew a fuse

Jim7: oh... yeah...

------------------
wang is within all
eat right, exercise, die anyway
2004-04-11, 6:35 AM #159
(NSP: Happy Easter all! Imagine Geb in a bunny outfit until I can make a story post [http://forums.massassi.net/html/wink.gif])
The Plothole: a home for amateur, inclusive, collaborative stories
http://forums.theplothole.net
2004-04-13, 9:01 AM #160
Thrawn42689 and Ahnuld wake up dazed and confused.

Thrawn42689: Wh..what happened?

Ahnuld: I don't know, last thing I remember...actually..I don't really re..

Suddenly Ahnuld gets a huge flashback

Ahnuld: Qwerty! CM!

Thrawn42689: Yes! That's it! We were trying to catch up to CM and Qwerty so we could kill them.

Ahnuld: Yes, yes! And then that ship blew up!

Thrawn42689: But...we weren't affected by the blast. We are robots! I just remember suddenly shutting down after....

Ahnuld: ...what?

Thrawn42689 gets increasingly mad

Thrawn42689: GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Ahnuld: Uh oh...

Thrawn42689: Now I remember...You and your freaking s’more. The explosion didn’t effect us...but, that s’more did. I remember!

Ahnuld: What did my S’more do?

Thrawn42689: You don’t remember do you?! The s’more got into one of my circuits and the sticky marshmallow just ruined me. You tried getting it all out, and you did, but along with it you clipped my memory wires. I got angry and bashed you over your memory circuit, then you fell on top of me, and since I couldn’t move I went into standby mode. Something must of hit us, because now we are awake......obviously.

Ahnuld: So are you still mad at me?

Thrawn42689: Meh...Stuff happens

Ahnuld: Wait...The s’more was from the Jet explosion...what about the mine?

Thrawn42689: Umm errm..

Suddenly a plot hole appears, Thrawn42689 and Ahnuld fall through it

Suddenly, a cloaked figure appears from the dark plot hole

Cloaked Figure: Hello Thrawn42689, Hello Ahnuld.

Thrawn42689: You..you know us?

CF: Of course, I know all. I am the Plot Hole Wizard!

Ahnuld: Oh! Will you grant us each 3 wishes!??!

PHW: Errm...

Thrawn42689: Ahnuld, shut up!

Ahnuld: Hey, you got us into this!

Thrawn42689: Pffft.

PHW: Silence!

Ahnuld: Oh, echo-y kind of.

PHW: If you two stop fighting I will grant you three wishes!

Thrawn42689: Really?

PHW: Sure, why not.

Thrawn42689: Okay.

Ahnuld: Done.

Silence strikes the room

PHW: So?

Thrawn42689: Shh, I’m thinking!

Ahnuld: Hmmm, I dunno Thrawn42689, I think we should wish for a Pony and some jellybeans.

Suddenly a large jellybean filled pony appears

Thrawn42689: WHAT THE HECK!?

Ahnuld: Woah...cool.

Thrawn42689: No, not cool! We didn’t even wish for that?! Ahnuld was just pondering!

Ahnuld: I dunno Thrawn42689, I mean...It’s a pony! With jellybeans!

Thrawn42689: This isn’t the time for jellybean pony’s Ahnuld!

Ahnuld: It’s jellybelly jelly beans...

Thrawn42689: Oh well, maybe just a few.. ohh! Loo...what am I saying!? We need to catch up to the he...I just got an idea

Ahnuld: Oh! Oh! Idea!

Thrawn42689: Plot Hole Wizard!

PHW: Aye?

Thrawn42689: I wish that you transport Ahnuld and I to the area in which CM and Qwerty are!

Ahnuld: ehem...

Thrawn42689: Oh and the Jellybean Pony too!

PHW: So be it!

POOF![/i]

Ahnuld: Whe...

Thrawn42689 whispering: Shhhhh.. Look. CM and Qwerty.

Ahnuld: Oh wow, look, there must be five or six, even more maybe.

Thrawn42689: Yes, but only two of us..well three.

Ahnuld pets the Jellybean pony

Ahnuld: So? We are robots.

Thrawn42689: Good point.. Still maybe we should stay here. Try to stay close to me. We will follow them wherever they go. With this jellybean pony, we will never run out of food.

Ahnuld: Wait, we are robots we don’t even eat.

Another plot hole opens, The Jellybean Pony, Ahnuld and Thrawn42689 fall through

PHW: you again?!

Ahnuld: Oh crap...

Thrawn42689: Just put us back where we were okay?!

PHW: Ugh, fine.

POOF!

Ahnuld: Sorry.

Thrawn42689: ... Just...don’t talk...just sit there and watch the Heroes. Also, turn on your hovering mechanism so you don’t make any sound when you walk. Be as quiet and calm as possible...Oh crap.

Ahnuld: What?

Thrawn42689: What will we do with the jellybean pony?

JBP: I’ll just fly around.

Thrawn42689 and Ahnuld stare at the JBP in shock

Thrawn42689: You can talk?

JBP: Yeah, duh. I can even refill myself. I’m very magical! I supply an infinite amount of jellybeans, and I can fly!

Two wings pop out of the JBP

Thrawn42689: Wow...That’s cool

Ahnuld: Woah..

Thrawn42689: What?

Ahnuld: I have hover shoes. That’s so cool.

Thrawn42689: ... Yeah.

Thrawn42689, The Jellybean Pony and Ahnuld are all right near the Heroes! They don’t even know! What will happen?! Will there be a fight? Will the villains be sneaky and wait for the opportune moment to attack? Will Evil Geb join forces with Our Villains?! Find out next time on..... THE NEVER ENDING STORY SQUARED!

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I’m not going to die, I’m going to see if I was ever alive. - Spike
It's not your right to decide whether they live or die. They deserve a chance! - Vash
Originally posted by Elana14: i would love a dong like that!
Think while it's still legal.
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