That's just par for the course for you though.

I see absolutely nothing to be confused about right there.

No sir.

Me neither. If there's one thing port visits in Malaysia and Thailand have taught me, it's that sailors have a soft spot for ladyboys.

Also, me cleaning a .50 caliber M2HB machine gun.

Your smile here scares me. It's like you are thinking about killing people with the .50 caliber and it makes you insanely happy.

I guess I'm jealous.

Lucky break for you that you ended up in the army instead of the navy. Narrow escape!

Edit: Oh wait..

sarn is in the navy

Well crap. The blue shirt should have clued me in.

I don't shave often, but when I do, I'm Mexican.

Whoah! I am impressed, sir.

That's just my "cleaning guns" smile... I enjoy it.

And yeah. I'm in the Navy. Doesn't stop me from making jokes about it. No, I don't have an interest in ladyboys. yes I have heard LOTS of stories about Navy guys getting drunk and "accidentally" hooking up with one. No I have not ever done this.

I'm trying to think of a way you could be more passively offensive, but I'm finding it difficult.

I didn't think I was being offensive. Just stating facts. Can you please explain why you are so offended by what I said?

(with the exception of my first sailor comment, but that was an intentional jab (really at myself, since I'm the only navy person here)

The term "ladyboy" for starters.

And just​ for starters, at that.

What is the PC term?

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/ladyboy

"An effeminate homosexual man, or one who adopts a feminine appearance, especially an intergender person"

Wonder if any of that will get censored. That does seem like a mouthful to say each time.

"Human/person/individual" for a start. Reducing anyone's entire self to a very specific noun is deeply dismissive and disparaging, versus applying adjectives to an ubiquitous parent class (eg "person"). Compare eg, "that Jewish guy" / "that Jew", "that person who happens to be homosexual" / "that homo". Calling an individual homosexual vs calling them "a gay" isn't about being PC, it's about actually respecting them as a complex and complete individual and not just a stereotype or The Other.

"Ladyboy" is a completely culture-bound categorization that isn't to be confused with the Western (admittedly poor) understanding of transgenderism. If anything it's closer to the idea of drag.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_identities_in_Thailand#Meaning_of_Kathoey.2FLadyboy

So asking "what is the PC term" is really unhelpful since it depends on greatly varying factors such as language, culture (since many many cultures around the world and history recognize more than two genders and even sexes), and most importantly personal identity.

In the West at least, the majority of transgender (and transsexual) [umbrella often is written just as "trans*"] individuals are binary-identified as one male/female (or man/woman. Not necessarily at the same time, eg bigender individuals may live different parts or locations of their lives as a different sex or gender). So with most Western trans* folk, it's not unreasonable to guess that it's respectful to address them based on their (current) gender expression, eg "that man" or "that woman" and not as "that transsexual" or "that ladyboy".

A subset of the trans* umbrella is non-binary identified individuals who don't identify as any one particular sex or gender, eg agender, genderqueer, androgynous, genderf*** individuals, or identify as "third sex" or "third gender" (India is probably most famous for "third sex" individuals, often referred to as "kinnar" or pejoratively as "hijra"; the Bugis culture in Indonesia recognize five genders). If hir gender isn't obvious to you, and you genuinely wish to respect hir, ask how zie would like to be addressed, but also don't feel like it's your right to know. "Them/they" can be acceptable, and isn't uncommon among non-binary trans* folk (since pronouns like zie/hir, ey/em, and so forth, aren't very commonly known outside of non-binary communities). "It" is considered deeply disrespectful unless it is its preferred pronoun, in which case by all means respect its wishes but don't assume that same usage applies to anyone else.

Long story short:
- Adjectives (if at all), not nouns.
- When in doubt, ask respectfully how to address someone and do not secondguess their answer. Your consideration may make their day. If you try to guess and misgender them, you may ruin their week.
- Don't assume anyone's sex or gender is any of your business. Unless you're in an intimate relationship, how is it possibly relevant to bagging their groceries or depositing their cheque?
- Lastly, don't presume that it's their responsibility to educate or enlighten you about the nuances of trans* experience or such. Some folk love to explain gender theory and anthropology at length; other people just want to buy some damn groceries and go home.

I'ma bag your groceries and deposit your cheque in a second here, Dor ~_^.

Don't tease! ^+^

Not teasing if they are ACTUALLY going to show up at your door at 2 AM, is it?

Also he's smiling because he knows he's going to put it together, and fuck up the headspace and timing as a present for the next sailor to come along.

But since Sarn specifically mentioned Thailand doesn't that make it a cultural reference and an acceptable use of the word?

No, that just makes it racist.

Either way, "ladyboy" is not generally considered an inappropriate or negative term. In fact, the Thai people who are transgenders refer to themselves as ladyboys when speaking in English, and non-transgendered Thai will refer to them as ladyboys as well in a way that has no negative connotations. If you walk down the market district streets of Thailand in the evening, women will step in front of you and grab your arms and say something along the lines of, "You want sexy massage? I have nice girl for you." When you politely refuse, and try to step around them, they will continue to block your path and ask you "You don't want girl? I have nice ladyboy for you," or some such. Other vendors will joke with you about finding a "ladyboy" for the evening.. It's a pretty common thing in Thailand, and the "ladyboys" there are treated with much more respect there than their equivalents are here in the states. That said, it is true that "ladyboy" is not a commonly used term when referring to other cultures besides Thai, so I can see where the confusion would arise. But it's not specifically derogatory.

That said, I chose the term "ladyboy" over transgender or transvestite any other applicable term because I was making fun of Navy sailors (and specifically the old gentleman Dor mentioned who asked her? to dance, who probably did not know the intricacies of Dor's gender). I guess it was a joke that went over CM's head because it was not culturally relevant.

Dor, if you did take offense at the term, then I apologize. I've never heard the term ladyboy used in a derogatory way, so it didn't occur to me that it might be taken as such. It was certainly not meant to be.

And Sppok, I know how to set headspace and timing, thanks. (Btw, did you know those keys cost roughly $300? Ridiculous.)

Sarn, I think the crux was that- while it is used by certain segments of drag/trans* culture in Thailand- that there is still a huge diversity of identities it obscures. There are "kathoey" (there is a more recent/accepted term that escapes me at the minute) may identify as gay men in drag, as an intermediary and/or third sex/gender, as bigender, as transgender in the usual Western understanding, or as nothing more than or less than women, &c. So the blanket use of the term for anyone Thai who doesn't self-identify as such is pretty problematic since it erases and clumps together so many different and unrelated narratives.

To be honest I was more startled than offended by your usage since it's pretty incompatible with my culture (I'm wayyyy too pale and Nordic; and for that mattere Thailand is hardly the only example-- I'm looking at you, British Navy) and I didn't honestly think people still talked like that. (And to be fair, the sailor was super old so it probably didn't even cross his mind. However, there were rather younger men who also asked- and were turned down since they weren't aged and harmless- as well, so I don't think it was just naval confusion). Any case, in answer to your question mark, I tend to prefer anything along the lines of she(makes the math easiest since it's what people tend to assume)/them/zie depending on how savvy the speaker is. Thanks for kind of asking.

But enough of this, I demand more amazing mustache portraits.

Oh no, not this again.

At least it's better than ragna confusing Dor's gender with being a hipster.

Well people do talk like that in Thailand, and (probably as a result of being exposed to that) Navy sailors talk like that. In retrospect, the joke was probably directed at the wrong audience, but I do appreciate you taking the time to educate me (us) on that different way of thinking. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me, but it's an interesting viewpoint to say the least.

All Sailors are racists.

that's true. Proof: I'm quite clearly about to shoot this black person.

here also:

Is that guy behind you wearing desert BDU's? Is this 2001?

That's what the VBSS team wears.. I'm not really sure why. Apparently it's all tactical.

Smooth.

Alan is on MILF patrol

What can I say, they dig hawaiian print and hats at jaunty angles

no offense but ide fucking kill myself if i ever wore a hat like that in public, but you pull it off somehow in a "go to bed kid so i can bang your three times divorced mother" sort of what

yes

that is a compliment

maybe im just jealous because i cant pull off any hats, is it because ive got a mighty nose? no idea.

If that's pulling it off in your mind, I'd hate to see what you look like in a hat.