If corporations are people, does that mean they have second amendment rights?

Like in Aliens.

Change in topic. Science people: I consume a lot of soy milk. Am I going to be okay?

No.

That **** is disgusting and there's something wrong with you.

But physically, yeah, you'll be okay. If you can call that a life.

****ing soy milk, how does it work?

And I don't wanna talk to a scientist, y`all ************s lyin`, and gettin` me pissed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFabsRFnWy0

There's legit actual estrogen in your tap water. It's in urine, from women on birth control or hormone supplements, pregnant women, even pregnant animals. It's not removed by waste or water treatment. It's also not removed when they use that tap water to make Mountain Dew. If you're going to be concerned about dietary estrogen, that should probably be a more significant source of concern than trace amounts of phytoestrogens that may or may not behave like estrogen in your body.

Pfizer Premarin[sup]tm[/sup] = PREgnant MARe urINe. It's in your water.

So what you're saying is I can't even avoid consuming feminizing estrogen by drinking Mountain Dew instead of tap water?

Try Brain Force.

What about diet Mountain Dew?

That's right.

Also, feminine features in men are mostly caused by lack of exercise when you were young. Your weak jaw and slender frame are because you didn't chew fibrous husky foods or perform intense physical labor during childhood, like your ancestors did. Working a skeleton causes microfractures, which stimulates bone thickening, creating the heavy frame and strong jaw that we associate with masculinity. And your patchy beard is because of genetics. And your moobs are because you are fat.

I mean, not you specifically. I mean in general. Well, actually I mean to make fun of the kind of person who would actually be worried about this. 4chan nazi cosplayers in mom's basement.

But remember that you can fix it by eating raw onions.

Raw onions are ****in delicious, slice 'em up and blanch for 30 seconds. Skeleton primate mammary.

And to think I ever wondered how there was such a market for phony nutritional supplements.

I have this conspiracy theory that the modern rejection of the educated working class (professionals, college professors, scientists) by the conservative working poor was orchestrated by the educated rich to reassert the value of a college degree as a class signifier. College degrees have generally gotten less valuable as more people earn them, but nobody has lost as much utility from them as the rich, who have gone from using them as a shibboleth of their class status to being publicly humiliated for their poor academic performance. Creating an artificial divide between the rich who "deserve" their degrees and use them "properly", and the poor, who are merely out-of-touch ivory tower elitists, makes their degrees valuable again, and discourages more poor people from trying to elevate themselves.

Sort of like how conservatives talk about how we shouldn't worry about police killing black people until black people stop killing black people, but they don't do anything about that, either.

"Whatever you do, don't get educated. The path to riches surely is to slave your way up from the bottom by working for me."

Ok ok ok so what if I condense water from water vapor and make my own Mountain Dew? Will that make me a man? Also is there any amount of manual labor I can do now to compensate for my pampered post-industrial upbringing?

Nothing like a college-educated politician creating policies to discourage people from attending college and becoming active in politics.

https://www.infowarsstore.com/health-and-wellness/water-filtration.html

Make sure you don't use any plastic, because if your condenser has plastic parts, or the Mountain Dew syrup factory uses plastic or packaged the syrup in plastic, your Mountain Dew will contain trace amounts of plasticizers that may function like estrogen in your body. Also some industrial cleaners will do it too, so, like, you'd better make sure your process is filthy as **** too.

Building your own water purification plant is going to take a fair amount of time and effort. You'll probably learn a lot of stuff. I don't know if it'll make you man, but it'll make you better at doing something, and that's really all any of us can hope for.

No. You are stuck with your ****ty skeleton for the rest of your life. But at least your casket will be cheap.

soooooo much plastic on this page. lol.

Anybody want to buy some DNA pills?

Only $100.

DNA sounds like some ivory tower liberal egghead talk, I'm pretty sure God fashioned me from clay, and a stork delivered me to my parents.

I probably have self-esteem and self-image issues because I don't have enough DNA, so that could help.

A microscopic swirly thing that says how my body works? Well I don't see any swirly things here! Obama is making my frogs gay with DNA!

Also, that ad is getting me in the yuletide spirit.

NOT THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT.

thats cultural appropriation

Some of this stuff does seem to border on self-parody. It makes me wish that selling supplements was a crucial part of the Info Wars business model because Alex Jones had an incredibly weird, self-aware sense of humor, rather than because he was preying on the men's insecurities. I suppose both can be true.

Well you can't argue with 900+ five star reviews, can you?

You mean supplements won't only make me more masculine, they'll help me transcend time and space in an ecstatic face-to-face experience of God?

AND THEY'RE 33% OFF?!?!

They'll also collect all the toxins that Jon has been warning about.

I guess it's finally time I let you guys in on my first name.

How long did it take to apply the libertarian solution to a seemingly difficult problem here that Eversor was having?

The answer always lies in making a financial transaction (the solution to all our woes).

Not all of my problems will be solved with a transaction. I also need to learn basic engineering in order to build an atmospheric water generator.

Let's get manly, gents!

Would you like to buy a book that tells you how to do that?

"How to turn stuff you made in JED into real life"

"How to turn memes into true statements"

My personal belief is that Alex Jones does the humor bits in part for marketing / entertainment value, but also in part as a hedge against the inevitable depression brought on by that sneaking feeling that he is a worthless scam artist.

I mean, don't want to end up like this fellow 9/11 conspiracy theorist did.



https://www.theverge.com/2014/7/22/5881501/the-unbelievable-life-and-death-of-michael-c-ruppert